Denial

CELEBRATE RECOVERY – LESSON 1

DENIAL

I. Principle 1 – I Am Not God

Core Truth:

We are powerless to control our tendency to do the wrong thing. Our lives become unmanageable when we try to play God.

Scriptures:

Matthew 5:3 – Blessed are the spiritually poor

Matthew 5:3 ESV

“Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

We start on our paath in denial because we think we are in control.

We think that we can overcom grief -

we think that we can control if were goin to have another drink,

or if were going to have another bite.

And so if this is your mindset -

step one is quite the jarring sentence for you “powerles to control our tendency to do the wrong thing” You might feel that this is a weak thing to do.

That we should just try harder or be stronger.

And yet - the powerlessness that we are admitting is not weakness-

its recongnzing spiritual truth -|

Romans 7:18 “For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.”

. We’ve tried trying harder,

it doesn’t work. its hard to come to this conclusion because our culture is a work harder culture

- work harder, do better, you can be whatever you want.

and yet, if you’re in here youve found all those things to ve lies because you are incapable. Once we can humble our selves and reconginze this reality -

its only then we can actually make change. its only when we realize we cant make change that change can actually happen. Christ says in the beattitudes Matthew 5:3 ““Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.” So thats us - we are poor inspirit we have nothing to offer. And because of that we get blessing - and this kingdom of heaven And thats the change. Christ came not only promising a kingdom to come but a kingdom now - and that kingdom now is something we recieve through the holy psirit - and its the holy spirit that is what changes us. Does the work of morphing and transfomring us into new being So for us to become new kingdom people, its start by reconginzing we are not.

II. Two Roadblocks to Recovery

Now this is a great step to take. But there are two things that will hold us back when we get there. First thing - failures of the past. We can reconginize our spiritual voidness - but if it comes with shame its not really progress

A. Failures from the Past

First thing - failures of the past.

We can reconginize our spiritual voidness

- but if it comes with shame its not really progress

. We then end up in this shame loop wheree we recongize were but

but are frozen by shame and guilt and continue to be spirtually void. Hebrews 12:1 “Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,”

he writer of hebrews tells us to strip those things off —

and funnily enough this likely is refferign to how in the greek olympics the runners would start the race by stripping everything they were wearing and just start running.

This is funny,

but it helps give us a good idea of what the writer means.

Strip everything thing that is slowing you down.

Strip the shame —

strip the sin from the past

and the weight of it.

You are forgiven by Christs work on the cross —

so you can.

But it does take time for this to get engrained into your soul.

Udnerstanding the forgiveness God does have for you.

But its true —

Christ and his perfect life has been declared over you —

and your sin was beared by him.

So you’re delcared righteous

and every sin you have commited

and will commit

has been paid for.

So what are you carrying

that God didn’t tell you to?

he didn’t tell you to carry a thing.

Its okay to remember the past,

remember the depravity of your soul,

but to live in it

isn’t healthy

or good.

Take after what paul says in Philipians 3 —

English Standard Version Chapter 3

forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus

Leave it in the past

and continue to strain forward toward the future Christ has for you

But if we forget that it is “Christs” future for us

and just look at the future we can have fear.

B. Fears for the Future

Hebrews 13:6 – The Lord is my helper

1 John 4:18 – Perfect love drives out fear

And we do know that our future will be different than our past -

and thats scarey too. Even if we do remember its God’s -

that might scare you even more.

What will he do with you, how will he change you, who will you be?

And we might want to return to know what we know. All this Change might threaten what you know about yourself and who youve been up to this point And that might make you freeze. But we have help in this we have

Hebrews 13:6 “So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?””

No matter what changes come no matter what we face we have the lord with us now.

So when we are walking with him we have nothing to fear even when the fear is what God is doing.

That fear is misplaced trust -

you’re placing trust in your plans/understanding over Gods

but we must remember thats what has brought us here in the first place.

But all this fear tends to fall flat when we live in community.

So in your small group -

or with your accountability partners -

share whats scaring you.

Most the time by the tim you even speak it aloud you come to find that its not true Ask yourself today - why am i afraid of change?

And this really tends to bebecause we haven’t totally admitted to what needs to be changed That’s denial - and weve mentioned it but we didn’t fully unpack it-

III. What Is Denial?

Denail is a false belief system not based on whats real. And its not a lie because you have fun lying to yourself -

buyt really its a self protecting behavior.

You want to uphold this good view of yourself or of your life -

so you dont full look at it without some bias

And this tends to be something we are taught

It could have been a coping skill you learned as a kid,

or your could have been driven to hide things and have shame and secrecy,

or maybe you’re family had a pink elefant in the room

You never talked about it but it was something eveyrone in the family saw.

But no one else could know about this thing now we can reconginze denial by the way we talk about something

You know you’re entering into the waters of denial

“It’s not that bad.”

“If we don’t talk about it, it’ll go away.”

“I’m fine.”

“Everyone else does worse.”

“I work hard; I deserve this.”

See - those are all very sublte ways to avoid a real issue.

And you might feel like you are protecting yourself or that might by your subconcious intention -

but really its destructive.

Because if you’re contantly not recongnizng your issues you cannt get help with them you can heal a wound you dont treat thats all this is - its not something to be shameful You have a wound that needs treated, we all do Whats yours? Jeremiah 6:14 “They have healed the wound of my people lightly, saying, ‘Peace, peace,’ when there is no peace.” “healed it lightly” There is no healing where there is no healing And thats wound thats festering is our Acrostic tonight Its the effects of denial

IV. Effects of Denial (Acrostic)

D – Disables our feelings

We numb to survive.

Frozen emotions block freedom.

Application:

Encourage safe emotional honesty.

E – Energy lost

Anxiety drains present strength.

Worry about past and future steals today.

Application:

Shift energy from hiding to healing.

N – Negates growth

We are only as healthy as our secrets.

Growth requires truth.

Application:

Call out secrecy as the enemy of growth.

I – Isolates us from God

Adam and Eve hid.

Shame drives hiding.

Application:

Expose the lie that God rejects you when you fail.

A – Alienates us from relationships

Secrets cost connection.

Lying fractures trust.

Application:

Encourage truth-telling in safe relationships.

L – Lengthens the pain

Denial doesn’t protect; it multiplies.

Truth hurts briefly; lies hurt long-term.

Application:

Contrast short-term discomfort vs long-term healing.

V. Wrap-Up Call

John 8:32 “and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.””

Big Close:

Denial is a mask - and this road of recovery really cant start until that mask comes off

Healing begins where hiding ends