Joseph & Mary: A Match Made in Heaven

Introduction:

                Joseph and Mary are great examples to us in every way. Like them, we have a “job” to fulfil in God’s eternal plan. Each job is important. Each job needs to be done. Each job contributes to the completion of the overall plan. Therefore, no one job is really more important than any other job. Still, some Christians sit around and mourn, thinking themselves unimportant and not taking seriously the task God has assigned them. In reality, while God’s servants may have different tasks, all of God’s servants are of equal value. Each successfully completed mission, no matter how humble, earns the smile of the Father and his statement of approval, “well done, good and faithful servant.”

                We may never be used by God to do something that seems so pivotal to his plan from our perspective, but our perspective is flawed. Therefore, let’s briefly take a look at Joseph and Mary and see what this married couple have to teach us about what we as married couples should be working toward, or what you as a young person anticipating marriage should be striving for.

I. Mary’s Foundational Character (Lk 1:26-56)

A. Mary exhibits humility (Lk 1:29; Ps 25:9)

Quotation: “And when she saw him, she was troubled at his saying, and cast in her mind what manner of salutation this should be.” (Lk 1:29)

Explanation: Mary appears to be overwhelmed at the very idea that the God of Israel should be taking note of someone of a poor background from an insignificant, even despised, city.

Quotation: “The meek will he guide in judgment: And the meek will he teach his way.” (Ps 25:9)

Application: As creations rather than the Creator, we have no control or input into our creation. We have no input into what talents and abilities we receive. We have no ability to gain true knowledge or wisdom apart from God putting an awe of him in our hearts.

Quotation: “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge: But fools despise wisdom and instruction.” (Pr 1:7)

B. Mary exhibits faith (Lk 1:34)

Quotation: “Then said Mary unto the angel, How shall this be, seeing I know not a man?” (Lk 1:34)

Explanation: Mary’s question expresses no doubt by asking for a sign, but rather she asks for understanding to fulfil her calling.

C. Mary exhibits obedience (Lk 1:38)

Quotation: “And Mary said, Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be it unto me according to thy word. And the angel departed from her.” (Lk 1:38)

Explanation: You have to stop and think a moment to grasp the reasons why Mary’s obedience here is remarkable. She cannot have known for certain the response of her betrothed. It is entirely possible that her submission to God’s will in this matter will lead to her divorce in a few, short months. She must have known for sure the public embarrassment and social ostracism that would result from her situation. Still, her determination to obey trumps any hesitation over the personal consequences and causes her to express willing participation in God’s eternal plan of redemption.

Quotation: “The beginning of Jesus’ life is marked by a mother who submits to the will of God. The end of Jesus’ life is marked by the words: ‘Not my will, but yours be done.’” [R. C. Sproul, A Walk with God: An Exposition of Luke (Great Britain: Christian Focus Publications, 1999), 21.]

D. Mary exhibits thoughtfulness & wisdom (Lk 1:29, 39-56; 2:19)

Quotation: “And when she saw him, she was troubled at his saying, and cast in her mind what manner of salutation this should be.” (Lk 1:29)

Explanation: Notice that Mary, almost immediately, left to visit and rejoice with her relative, Elisabeth, in her miraculous news. I believe that Mary was truly excited for Elisabeth, who had endured the shame of barrenness for many, many years.

Quotation: Paul writes, “Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep.” (Ro 12:15)

Explanation: Mary may also have been visiting Elisabeth to seek comfort and support from someone who could understand her supernatural news.

Explanation: It appears that Mary may have left Elisabeth prior to the birth of John so as not to become a distraction from her relative’s joy.

Quotation: “And Mary abode with her about three months, and returned to her own house. Now Elisabeth’s full time came that she should be delivered; and she brought forth a son. And her neighbours and her cousins heard how the Lord had shewed great mercy upon her; and they rejoiced with her.” (Lk 1:56–58)

II. Joseph’s Foundational Character (Mt 1:19-25)

A. Joseph is just (Mt 1:19; 1 Jn 1:9; Ro 3:26)

Quotation: “Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a publick example, was minded to put her away privily.” (Mt 1:19)

Explanation: The word “just” can have a connotation of mildness or mercy (cf. 1 Jn 1:9). We see in God the Father the perfect balance of righteousness and mercy. He is just and the justifier of the one that believes.

Quotation: As Paul says, “To declare, I say, at this time his righteousness: that he might be just, and the justifier of him which believeth in Jesus.” (Ro 3:26)

B. Joseph is slow to anger (Mt 1:19-20; Joe 2:13)

Explanation: Notice that Joseph has not immediately sprung into action the heat of his initial emotions upon learning of Mary’s apparent unfaithfulness. Instead, he takes some time to think about things.

Quotation: “But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost.” (Mt 1:20)

Quotation: “And rend your heart, and not your garments, And turn unto the Lord your God: For he is gracious and merciful, Slow to anger, and of great kindness, And repenteth him of the evil.” (Joe 2:13)

C. Joseph exhibits humility (Mt 1:19-20; Ps 25:9)

Explanation: Joseph’s humility is seen here as well. A person of pride would have acted rashly and immediately to promote his own reputation rather than considering the reputation of another. Also, a humble person is willing to receive the instruction that the Lord is about to send to him. A prideful individual has no mind to receive such instruction. The cacophony of self-justifying thoughts present in his mind leaves no ability to hear the voice of reason or of explanation.

Quotation: “The meek will he guide in judgment: And the meek will he teach his way.” (Ps 25:9)

D. Joseph exhibits faith (Mt 1:20-25; Ro 4:19-21)

Quotation: “But while he thought on these things, behold, the angel of the Lord appeared unto him in a dream, saying, Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins. Now all this was done, that it might be fulfilled which was spoken of the Lord by the prophet, saying, Behold, a virgin shall be with child, and shall bring forth a son, and they shall call his name Emmanuel, which being interpreted is, God with us. Then Joseph being raised from sleep did as the angel of the Lord had bidden him, and took unto him his wife: And knew her not till she had brought forth her firstborn son: and he called his name JESUS.” (Mt 1:20–25)

Explanation: Joseph here reminds me of Abraham, the father of the faithful, as Paul describes him in Romans. When confronted with the humanly impossible, he overcomes incredulity by faith in the God with whom all things are possible.

Quotation: “And being not weak in faith, he considered not his own body now dead, when he was about an hundred years old, neither yet the deadness of Sara’s womb: He staggered not at the promise of God through unbelief; but was strong in faith, giving glory to God; And being fully persuaded that, what he had promised, he was able also to perform.” (Ro 4:19–21)

E. Joseph exhibits submission (Mt 1:20-25; Lk 3:23)

Explanation: Like Mary, Joseph too, is willing to obey in spite of any personal consequences. Joseph had to know that going through with the marriage to his pregnant betrothed was tantamount to an admission of guilt to impregnating his promised one prior to the culmination of the betrothal period.

Quotation: “And Jesus himself began to be about thirty years of age, being (as was supposed) the son of Joseph, which was the son of Heli,” (Lk 3:23)

Quotation: “Ye do the deeds of your father. Then said they to him, We be not born of fornication; we have one Father, even God.” (Jn 8:41)

III. Mary’s Developing Character

A. Mary exhibits submission (Mt 2:13-15, 19-23)

Explanation: God gives us no record of Mary’s inner feelings about the decision to flee Israel for Egypt, the decision to leave Egypt for Israel, and the decision to go back to their former hometown of Nazareth. We simply know that Mary followed her husband. She may have not understood everything Joseph conveyed to her about the revelations he received from God. She may not have agreed with every detail. What we do have on record is that she trusted in the Lord enough to submit to her husband’s leadership as God commands.

Quotation: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” (Eph 5:22)

B. Mary exhibits perseverance (Lk 2:48-51)

Quotation: “And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing. And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father’s business? And they understood not the saying which he spake unto them. And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.” (Lk 2:48–51)

Explanation: The human psyche does not naturally or easily follow the path of obedience when complete understanding is absent. Mary persevered in following and obeying the Lord’s leading in spite of her human inability to understand everything that was going on in the Father’s plan. She carefully noted things she did not understand and determined in her heart to hold on to them until the Lord chose to give her understanding.

IV. Joseph’s Developing Character

A. Joseph exhibits love (Mt 2:13-15, 19-23)

Explanation: Joseph is an excellent example of a man who did what was necessary to protect his family and lead them in the path that God had set for them. I’m reminded of Paul’s commands to husbands in Ephesians chapter 5.

Quotation: “Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it…So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” (Eph 5:25, 28)

B. Joseph exhibits wisdom (Mt 2:22-23)

Quotation: “But when he heard that Archelaus did reign in Judaea in the room of his father Herod, he was afraid to go thither: notwithstanding, being warned of God in a dream, he turned aside into the parts of Galilee: And he came and dwelt in a city called Nazareth: that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the prophets, He shall be called a Nazarene.” (Mt 2:22–23)

Explanation: What I see in these verses is that Joseph’s walk with God allowed him to anticipate the Lord’s thoughts. He does not assume that he does this correctly, but he seems to ask the Lord for confirmation. The Lord grants that request and gives him instruction to avoid the realm of Archelaus. Joseph’s original thought may have been to settle in Bethlehem, the hereditary home of descendants of David. This seems logical, given the son he was raising was to be the promised Son of David, the Messiah. After hearing the news of the new ruler of that section of the Promised Land, he doubted the wisdom of that course of action. The Lord confirmed his thoughts and instructed him to go back to their original home in Nazareth.

C. Joseph exhibits faithfulness (Lk 2:41-51)

Quotation: “Now his parents went to Jerusalem every year at the feast of the passover. And when he was twelve years old, they went up to Jerusalem after the custom of the feast.” (Lk 2:41–42)

Explanation: Joseph is very devout in his fellowship with the Lord. He led his wife and young son in worship, even in the long, difficult trip down to celebrate the Passover in Jerusalem. This was above and beyond the requirements of the law, which specified that only the men were required to “appear before the Lord” to celebrate the Passover.

Conclusion:

                What then should we be looking for in a spouse or to be so that we may be the spouse that God designed us to be? To sum it all up, we should be looking to find and be a person in relationship with the Lord who both exhibits some Christlikeness already and is growing in Christlikeness as they walk with God. Would you be what Christ wants you to be? Then you must be nothing of yourself so that he can make you into what you ought to be. Consider the truth of the Scriptures as Christ phrased it in his Sermon on the Mount: “Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted. Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.” The Psalmist put it this way, “The Lord is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart; And saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.”