Identifying Your Own Way

Prep: Slide - 2

P.R.A.Y.

Praise

Repent

Ask

Yield

Last Weeks Recap and Verse: Slide - 3-6

Last lesson - Knowledge Objectives:

Explain how the wrong view of man leads to the wrong diagnosis of man’s problems in the family, counseling, in Christian education, in the local church, and in management in Christian work. Slide - 3

Misdiagnosis in Parenting

What could be faulty reasons for teenage rebellion? hormonal battle, natural struggle for independence, etc.

How might them be solved? batten down the hatches, negotiate peace

Misdiagnosis in Counseling

What are unbiblical theories of human problems? codependency, low self-esteem and insecurities, damaged emotions, dysfunctional upbringing, unmet nee3ds, longings for security and significance....

Misdiagnosis in the Local Church

How might these impact the church?

Misdiagnosis in Christian Education

Explain what is wrong with man and why trusting the heart of man is so treacherous. Slide - 4

The Flesh Defies God

Isaiah 55:6–9 ““Seek the Lord while he may be found; call upon him while he is near; let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; let him return to the Lord, that he may have compassion on him, and to our God, for he will abundantly pardon. For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

Romans 8:7 “For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God, for it does not submit to God’s law; indeed, it cannot.”

Proverbs 28:26 “Whoever trusts in his own mind is a fool, but he who walks in wisdom will be delivered.”

The Flesh Defiles Man

Ephesians 4:18 “They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart.”

1 Corinthians 2:14 “The natural person does not accept the things of the Spirit of God, for they are folly to him, and he is not able to understand them because they are spiritually discerned.”

Ephesians 4:19 “They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity.”

Romans 8:13 “For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.”

1 Peter 2:11 “Beloved, I urge you as sojourners and exiles to abstain from the passions of the flesh, which wage war against your soul.”

The Flesh Deceives Man

Hebrews 3:13 “But exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.”

Jeremiah 17:9 “The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately sick; who can understand it?”

Ephesians 4:22 “to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires,”

The Flesh Destroys Man

Romans 8:13 “For if you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death the deeds of the body, you will live.”

James 1:15 “Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.”

The toxicity of the heart is so potent that when God wants to judge people, all he has to do is turn them over to their own hearts.

Romans 1

Understand why submission to the authority God has placed in your life is so crucial to your spiritual success. Slide - 5

God exists, and he made me.

My sin is against him, and he will hold me accountable for it unless I turn to him for salvation.

The way of the transgressor is hard.

There is only one way of salvation, not many.

Without him I can do nothing.

He loves me and skillfully orders my ways for my ultimate good and his ultimate glory.

His Word is the only trustworthy account of reality.

He has promised his grace for every trial and challenge of life.

Take Time to Reflect

How does what we have seen about the human heart fit with the common boasts we hear from those who are engaged in sinful habits (for example, “Don’t worry about me. I can handle it”)?

If people have been engaged in life-dominating sins such as drinking, doing drugs, practicing disordered eating, gambling, engaging in sexual perversions, and behaving self-destructively, why won’t ten or twelve simple steps restore them to usefulness and Christlikeness?

Why is it impossible to genuinely help people by encouraging them to feel good about themselves?

When in your life are you prone to raise a clenched fist to God and demand your own way?

How has your heart deceived you regarding sin in the past? What evidence do you see that it may be deceiving you in such a way again?

In what areas of your life is sin’s destruction making headway?

Application objectives : Slide - 6

Recognizing areas of your life where sin’s destruction is already making headway and where you are prone to raise a clenched fist at God and demand your own way?

Repenting of any self-confidence and self-reliance you tend to have.

Turning to God in dependence to keep you from trusting in your own heart

Bible Memory Lesson 2: Slide - 7

Proverbs 14:12 “There is a way that seems right to a man, But its end is the way of death.”

Introduction: Slide - 8

The Nature of our Nurture

Where do desires come from?

Some are natural bodily desires: Food, water, air.

most of the rest of the things we desire we learn from our surroundings.

Ephesians 2:3 “among whom we all once lived in the passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body and the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, like the rest of mankind.”

Can we unlearn these desires? Yup...see fashion trends

Where is the source of our temptations? from within

James 1:13–15 13 Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. 14 But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. 15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.

1 Corinthians 10:13 No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it. The New King James Version (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982), 1 Co 10:13.

The Masks of Rebellion: Slide - 9

Assertive Rebels

May do the following:

Consume drugs or alcohol, smoke, steal, lie, or gamble

Disobey, break curfews, behave disruptively or violently, bully others, or refuse to study

Engage in premarital sex, pornography, or other sexual habits

Dress unacceptably, behave obnoxiously, use bad language, or indulge in fleshly music or movies

Manipulate, argue, or act defiantly

What do assertive rebels say? “I won’t obey. Nobody is going to tell me what to do.”

Cooperative Rebels

Two Types

compliant at best: they are obedient but drag their feet, dawdle, are intentionally inefficient, slam doors, punish others by their attitude (pouting, sullenness), and think,

What might they say? “I’ll do what I have to do to get what I want, but I don’t agree with this and don’t want to do it.”

appears to be driven by a sense of duty: as children they are often described as “really good kids,” seem to go out of their way to be helpful, never seem to be a problem, are sometimes perfectionistic and legalistic, and think,

What might they say? I’ll do my best because I have learned that life works best this way” or “I’ll do my best because I like the image of being a great kid.”

Passive Rebels : Slide - 10

Three types

“I can’t obey,”

Passive rebels of this variety won’t get driver’s licenses or jobs. They won’t try out, reach out, speak out, or move out. They often excuse themselves with “I’m not feeling well” or “I have a disability” or “I’m a victim.

Proverbs 26:13–16 “The lazy man says, “There is a lion in the road! A fierce lion is in the streets!” 14 As a door turns on its hinges, So does the lazy man on his bed. 15 The lazy man buries his hand in the bowl; It wearies him to bring it back to his mouth. 16 The lazy man is wiser in his own eyes Than seven men who can answer sensibly. The New King James Version (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982), Pr 26:13–16.

“I forgot to obey,”

often indicates laziness and shows up in untidiness and constant sleepiness

conveniently forget chores, responsibilities, and appointments. They often appear absent-minded.

Their minds aren’t dysfunctional but distracted by some other obsession.

“I didn’t know to obey.”

often intentional ignorance

These passive rebels can claim they didn’t hear the instructions or didn’t think the instructions applied to their situation.

A further refinement of this is “I just acted without thinking.” They are not, however, acting without thinking. They are acting without thinking about the consequences.

The Reason for Hope: Slide - 11

1 Corinthians 6:9–10 “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, 10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. “ The New King James Version (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982), 1 Co 6:9–10.

1 Corinthians 6:11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God. The New King James Version (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982), 1 Co 6:11.

2 Corinthians 5:17 Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new. The New King James Version (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982), 2 Co 5:17.

Galatians 5:19–21 Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, 21 envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. The New King James Version (Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982), Ga 5:19–21.

• Sexual immorality—adultery; sexual intercourse between individuals married to someone else

• Impurity—lewdness; dirty-mindedness

• Sensuality—blatant and shameless contempt for public decency

• Idolatry—worshipping false gods

• Sorcery—use of magical powers, mediums, and occult practices

• Enmity—hostile attitude toward others

• Strife—contentious spirit; hostile actions

• Jealousy—spirit of envy

• Fits of anger—explosive, angry outbursts

• Rivalries—competition coming from devotion to self

• Dissensions—feuding, divisive spirit within the group

• Divisions—disunity created by a stubborn opinion

• Envy—embittered resentment often manifesting itself in hostile, spiteful deeds

• Murder—taking someone’s life unlawfully

• Drunkenness—intoxication

Are there any problems God’s word doesn’t address?

Discussion: Slide - 12

Where does the underlying sin or problem exist? The problem is in the heart, not the circumstances

God says our most basic problem is our propensity to turn “every one—to his own way” Isaiah 53:6 “All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned—every one—to his own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.”

What are some of the elements that constitute your own way? For further help, complete the sentences below.

I feel most secure when …

All I want to have/be/do is …

The thing I worry about most is …

The thing that keeps me awake at night is …

I go into a panic when …

I get most angry when …

I tend to get very discouraged when …

Do you find yourself depicted in any of the three kinds of rebels discussed in this chapter? Rather than trying to find out exactly which kind of rebel you are, identify the ways in which you are most prone to rebel and rebel characteristics that you most identify with. Write out your answers.

God exposes the rebellion of our own way by placing us in “hot water.” What hot-water situations has God placed you into at this time in order to expose your self-centeredness? (Hot-water situations include physical struggles, struggles with temptations and desires, pressures at home or work, and relational problems with others.)

What kinds of wrong responses come out of you when you can’t have your own way? How does your self-centered “tea” taste to others around you?

Conclusion: Slide - 13

Explain why the rebellion of our own way manifests itself differently in each of us?

Recognize different kinds of rebel ways evidenced in your own life and in the lives of those with whom you live and to whom you minister

Know why there is hope for any of us who wish to make biblical change

Application: Slide - 14

Being much more cautions of your own actions and reactions throughout the day since you are more aware of how your own way manifests itself in “hot water” conditions

Encouraging others who have lost hope about making biblical change

Asking God to increase your awareness of your rebel ways, repenting of their manifestations, and depending upon Him to help you change those ways.

Bible Memory - Lesson 3: Slide - 15

James 1:14–15 “But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. 15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death."