The Power of Knowing Why

Opening Scripture

Haggai 1:1–5 NIV

In the second year of King Darius, on the first day of the sixth month, the word of the Lord came through the prophet Haggai to Zerubbabel son of Shealtiel, governor of Judah, and to Joshua son of Jozadak, the high priest: This is what the Lord Almighty says: “These people say, ‘The time has not yet come to rebuild the Lord’s house.’ ” Then the word of the Lord came through the prophet Haggai: “Is it a time for you yourselves to be living in your paneled houses, while this house remains a ruin?” Now this is what the Lord Almighty says: “Give careful thought to your ways.

This passage scripture takes place in 520 BC. and the Jewish exiles have been back in Jerusalem for about 18 years.

They Initially returned with a massive “Why” which was to rebuild the temple and restore their relationship with God.

The Stall: They started the work, but when opposition arose and the economy got tough, they quit. For nearly 2 decades, the foundation of the temple sat gathering dust.

The Pivot: Instead of fulfilling their commitment to God, they pivoted their energy toward their own “paneled houses”.

The Deception of "Not Yet": In verse 2, the people say, "The time has not yet come." This is the classic excuse for a failing commitment. We tell ourselves we’ll invest in the marriage after the kids are grown, or we'll commit to the community after we’re financially stable.

The Divine Discontent: Haggai points out that because their "Why" is misplaced, nothing they do satisfies. They eat but are never full; they dress but aren't warm (v. 6). Theologically, this suggests that any commitment made for the wrong reasons (ego, comfort, fear) will eventually feel hollow.

You can work incredibly hard and still feel empty if the foundation is wrong.

So many times we wonder why the relationship never seems to get better, why does the marriage seem not to heal could it be because we are approaching it with the wrong intentions.

When we try to fix something with false pretenses it only further damages the relationship or marriage.

We develop false pretenses when continually try to hide from the truth instead of accepting the reality of what is wrong and what we need to improve on.

False pretenses comes from a place of self deception.

The more deceived you have become the harder it will be for you to see the truth

Understanding the “Why” keeps us grounded in self truth which prevents us from developing false pretenses and being deceived.

The Mirror of Sincerity: Stripping The False Pretense

2 Corinthians 13:5 NIV

Examine yourselves to see whether you are in the faith; test yourselves. Do you not realize that Christ Jesus is in you—unless, of course, you fail the test?

Paul challenges us to test ourselves along with providing us with a reminder that Jesus is in us.

“Counterfeit” is literally the greek meaning of “Failing the test”.

If Jesus does not have access to our heart we have already failed the test — We have a counterfeit relationship/faith.

If our relationship with Jesus isn’t foundational neither will any of our other relationships…

Just as some folks have a counterfeit relationship with Jesus so they also have with others.

We can’t correct anything that we don’t see is wrong or incorrect

What determines if we have a counterfeit relationship with Jesus or anyone else in our lives is by understanding how committed we truly are to that relationship.

If you stripped away the social status, the financial security, or the convenience of this commitment, what would be left?

Character Vs. Chemistry

1 Corinthians 15:33 NIV

Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”

When we select who we want to be our friend we often times do so on the basis of “Chemistry”, how we connect with them instead of their Character.

Chemistry is on the basis of feeling… how much fun do i have when i am with this person? how does this person makes me feel? Feelings aren’t always a bad thing BUT its also not the most important thing.

Character shows us a persons true nature — there habits which relate to their personal values.

When we select friendships on the basis of Chemistry vs Character we are going to end up choosing the wrong friends

When having friends of the opposite sex this often times leads into a deeper commitment such as marriage in which case we end up at some point or another discovering that we are unevenly yoked.

Looking only at Chemistry will always leave you blind sided from the truth of who the person actually is.

We should look at Chemistry but in connection with Character

The Result of Authentic Alignment

Proverbs 3:5–6 NIV

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.

When we are authentically aligned with Jesus we step fully into the will of God

When we step fully into the will of God everything else falls into place

We can’t be truly committed to anything unless we learn what commitment looks like — this comes from our relationship with Jesus

When we authentically aligned with Jesus we naturally by default trust in Him with ALL of our Heart

It’s not always easy but we hold onto the truth of our testimony as a reminder of the faithfulness of God.

As we continue to trust Him He Will make every path straight —- that is our Relationships, our partnerships, our friendships, our marriages.

When the "Why" is corrected and the pretenses are dropped, the "path" becomes straight.

Your Next Steps:

1. Perform a "Paneled House" Audit:

Identify one relationship where you’ve been saying "the time has not yet come" to do the hard work.

2. Take the "Stripped Away" Test:

Mentally "strip away" the social status, financial convenience, or shared hobbies of your primary commitments.

Ask: "If this person could do nothing for me, would I still be committed to their growth and our shared mission?" If the answer is no, you are operating under a false pretense.

3. Conduct a "Habit vs. Vibe" Evaluation:

List your three closest influences. Next to their names, list their three most consistent habits, not their personality traits.

Do those habits align with the "Why" of your life? If their habits contradict your values, you must recalibrate the "access" they have to your heart.

4. Grant "Full Heart-Access" to Jesus:

Identify the one "room" in your heart you’ve kept locked (a secret resentment, a hidden habit, or a fear).

In prayer, explicitly invite Jesus into that specific room. Tell Him, "I am done pretending this isn't here." You cannot correct what you refuse to see.

5. Trade "Leaning" for "Leading":

When faced with a relational choice, stop and ask: "Is this choice based on my 'understanding' (how I feel right now) or God's 'Straight Path' (His Word and Character)?"

Practice Active Submission. Before making a commitment, wait 24 hours to ensure you aren't being "blindsided" by chemistry or impulse.