M.A.R.R.I.A.G.E: (M)arriage as God Designed It

Introduction

Over the past few weeks, we’ve laid the foundation for this series by looking at God’s original design for marriage and the devastating impact of the Fall. We saw what God intended in the beginning and how sin distorted our relationships, our desires, and even our understanding of marriage.

But now, we shift from the foundation to the application. From what marriage was in Eden to how redeemed people live out marriage — and singleness — in a fallen world.

Before we talk about marriage, Scripture requires us to talk about something else first: how to live faithfully as an unmarried person. The church is made up of both single and married believers, and both are essential to the body of Christ. So today, we will look at God’s call for singles and God’s design for marriage, because both matter deeply to God.

Let’s begin with the unmarried.

I. BIBLICAL SINGLENESS — A CALL TO UNDIVIDED DEVOTION

1 Corinthians 7:25–35 ESV

25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away. 32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.

Paul writes to a church filled with married people, widows, divorced individuals, and unmarried believers. And he says something that is contrary to what our culture thinks:

“Each has his own gift from God.” (v. 7)

Paul calls singleness a gift.

Not a curse. Not a waiting room. Not a punishment. A gift.

A. Singleness Is a Gift with Purpose (v. 7)

Paul is not saying singleness is easy. He is saying singleness is purposeful.

Marriage is a gift.

Singleness is a gift.

Both are God-ordained contexts for glorifying Him.

Your worth is not determined by your marital status. Your identity is not “single.” Your identity is “in Christ.”

B. Singleness Allows Undivided Devotion (vv. 32–35)

Paul says the unmarried believer can be “concerned about the things of the Lord.”

Not because married people are less spiritual, but because married people have divided responsibilities.

Singles have a unique freedom to:

Serve without divided obligations

Pursue ministry opportunities more freely

Cultivate spiritual disciplines with greater focus

This is not a burden — it is a blessing.

C. Singleness Is a Season to Seek God First (Matthew 6:33)

Jesus says, “Seek first the kingdom of God.”

Singleness is not a pause button. It is not preparation for “real life.” It is real life.

It is a season — temporary or lifelong — where God shapes character, deepens devotion, and forms identity.

D. God Himself Is the Portion of the Unmarried (Isaiah 54:5)

“For your Maker is your husband.”

This is covenant language. God is the provider, protector, and companion of the unmarried.

Singles are not spiritually incomplete. They are not relationally deficient. They are not waiting to be whole.

They are fully known, fully loved, and fully valued by God. Now let us shift focus to marriage.

II. MARRIAGE AS GOD DESIGNED IT — A REDEEMED UNION THAT REFLECTS CHRIST

Ephesians 5:21–33 ESV

21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ. 22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Now that we’ve honored God’s Word to the unmarried, we turn to God’s design for marriage — not in Eden, but in the gospel. Paul does not begin with Adam and Eve. He begins with Christ and the Church.

Ephesians 5 is not merely a marriage passage. It is a Christ-centered, gospel-saturated vision of marriage. Marriage is Spirit-filled worship towards God (v. 18-21).

A. Marriage Is a Picture of the Gospel (v. 32)

Paul says:

“This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”

Marriage is not ultimately about compatibility, romance, or personal fulfillment. Marriage is about displaying the gospel.

Husbands represent Christ.

Wives represent the Church.

Marriage represents redemption.

Marriage is a living parable of Jesus’ love.

B. Wives Reflect the Church’s Devotion to Christ (vv. 22–24)

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord.”

This is not about inferiority. This is not about oppression. This is not about silence or passivity.

This is about voluntary, joyful, Christlike devotion.

Just as the Church follows Christ:

willingly

joyfully

trustingly

so the wife supports her husband’s leadership. She is the helper not him!

This is not cultural. This is Christ-centered.

C. Husbands Reflect Christ’s Sacrificial Love (vv. 25–30)

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.”

This is the highest calling in Scripture for any husband.

Christ loved the Church by:

giving Himself

sacrificing Himself (Loving Protector)

sanctifying her (Loving Priest)

nourishing her (Loving Provider)

cherishing her

A husband’s leadership is not about control. It is not about dominance. It is not about privilege.

It is about loving sacrifice.

A husband leads by dying to himself. He leads by loving. He leads by serving. He leads by protecting. He leads by pointing his wife to Christ. (Priest, Provider, Protector)

Biblical headship is not about superiority — it is about responsibility.

D. Marriage Is a One-Flesh, Christ-Centered Union (v. 31)

Paul quotes Genesis:

“The two shall become one flesh.”

But he interprets it through the gospel.

One flesh is not merely physical intimacy. It is covenant intimacy.

One mission

One purpose

One direction

One life

Marriage is a covenant union empowered by Christ. Your marriage must reflect your relationship with Jesus.

III. WHY BOTH SINGLES AND MARRIED BELIEVERS NEED THIS MESSAGE

A. Singles need a biblical vision of marriage

So they pursue it with godly wisdom, not desperation.

B. Married couples need a biblical vision of singleness

So they can honor and support unmarried believers.

C. The church needs both

Because the body of Christ is made up of both, and both are essential to the mission of God.

IV. Practical Application

For Singles:

Pursue holiness, not just marriage

Cultivate community

Guard your heart from idolatry

Serve with your freedom

For Married Couples:

Build on God’s Word, not culture

Practice covenant love, not consumer love

Pursue unity intentionally

Protect your marriage fiercely

For the Church:

Honor both callings

Disciple both groups

Celebrate both gifts

Conclusion

Singleness is a gift. Marriage is a gift. Both are callings. Both are sacred. Both are God-ordained contexts for glorifying Him.

And as we continue through this series — M.A.R.R.I.A.G.E. — we will see how God’s design shapes every part of our lives.

Let us now commit ourselves to living redeemed lives — whether single or married — in this fallen world, for the glory of God.