Sorrow into Joy

Intro

The day was September 23, 2008, just after midnight

Kim went into labor and we headed to the hospital

Well, Jeremiah was not born until 5:31pm, so 17+ hours of labor

Of course it was uncomfortable - Kim couldn’t eat or drink, she was in pain, the anesthesia did not work

But then, the last couple of hours, in the worst of the pains of childbirth, Kim started yelling at me

“You did this to me! This is all your fault! We are never doing this again!”

And then… the baby was born

Kim held Jeremiah in her hands, looked at his face

And everything changed… the pain didn’t immediately disappear, but it no longer mattered

Whenever Kim or I talk about that day, we don’t talk about the pain and sorrow…

I don’t talk about leaving because I was hungry - just because she couldn’t eat didn’t seem like a good reason for me not to eat

Or how I ran to the little hospital gift shop to buy flowers, only to get back to the room and have Kim yell at me for leaving her alone in the middle of the pain

We talk about the joy of meeting our son, of looking him in the eyes for the first time, of introducing him to his grandparents, etc.

What I want us to understand is that sorrow was transformed into joy

And it is that imagery that we will encounter in our passage this morning

Please turn in your Bibles with me to John 16 where we will look at verses 16-24

Scripture Reading: John 16:16-24

John 16:16–24 ESV

“A little while, and you will see me no longer; and again a little while, and you will see me.” So some of his disciples said to one another, “What is this that he says to us, ‘A little while, and you will not see me, and again a little while, and you will see me’; and, ‘because I am going to the Father’?” So they were saying, “What does he mean by ‘a little while’? We do not know what he is talking about.” Jesus knew that they wanted to ask him, so he said to them, “Is this what you are asking yourselves, what I meant by saying, ‘A little while and you will not see me, and again a little while and you will see me’? Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice. You will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will turn into joy. When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world. So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you. In that day you will ask nothing of me. Truly, truly, I say to you, whatever you ask of the Father in my name, he will give it to you. Until now you have asked nothing in my name. Ask, and you will receive, that your joy may be full.

Pray

Main Point

In college, with a couple of friends, someone asked about the difference between happiness and joy

Certainly they are synonyms, but are they fully interchangeable?

In the moment I commented that happiness comes and goes based on the present circumstances , but joy is more of an abiding contentment that can transcend circumstances

And I would say, for something I said at 19 or 20 years old, not too bad

Happiness is hard to find when being laid off from a job, hearing the big “C” word from the doctor, sitting at the bed of someone as they die

And those are the “big” things in life

It’s also hard to be happy when cut off in traffic, pulled over for speeding, or when someone is unkind to us for no reason

Happiness, understandably, is squashed by sorrow

But, here is the promise:

The sorrows of this life will give way to a joy that can never be taken from you

Sorrow

Expectations Regarding Sorrow

Last week we saw in John 15 that if the world hated Jesus, as our master, we should expect that the world will hate us, his servants

And I keep thinking of the far-reaching implications of our expectations

For example, when I do premarital counseling, I spend almost the entire time talking about expectations with the couple

Turns out, couples never argue about the things they agree about

I know that sounds silly, but nearly every disagreement in a marriage has, at its core, a difference of expectations

One is a spender, the other is a saver

One expects to spend Christmas with extended family and the other grew up traveling to exotic locations over Christmas

I could go on and on… whether it is finances, relationships with in-laws, sex, parenting… clarity on expectations matters

So let me ask this: When it comes to sorrow, what are your expectations?

Do you expect it?

Do you have expectations of what it will look like?

On Sorrow

Grief, sadness, mourning, lament, pain, suffering

So many words that we could apply to idea of sorrow

Just consider the topics we have covered in the last few weeks:

Betrayal

Denial

Hated by the world

All that is fresh in the minds of the disciples when Jesus continues:

John 16:16 ““A little while, and you will see me no longer; and again a little while, and you will see me.””

“Wait, Jesus, you drop all that on us and now you are leaving us?”

You can sense their confusion and unease

They start looking around, whispering to one another, trying to make sense of it all

What is Jesus talking about?

Look again at verse 19

John 16:19 “Jesus knew that they wanted to ask him, so he said to them, “Is this what you are asking yourselves, what I meant by saying, ‘A little while and you will not see me, and again a little while and you will see me’?”

Jesus leans in, knowing what they were thinking

So let’s look at some of Jesus’ next comments

John 16:20 “Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice. You will be sorrowful…”

John 16:22 “So also you have sorrow now…”

Or skip down to verse 33

John 16:33 “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation…”

Uhh, Jesus, promising tribulation is not the most peace-inducing thing you could have said!

Couple of key elements of sorrow

We should expect sorrow as these verses have shown (I mean, we have an entire book of the Bible called “Lamentations!”)

The appropriate response toward sorrow is to weep and grieve

Unfortunately, in too many Christian environments, weeping is seen as weakness and sorrow as a lack of faith

This is both ironic and woefully misguided given that we have a verse that reads, simply, “Jesus wept”

The world is going to rejoice

This is one of the hardest things to consider

For all our sorrow, as verse 30 says, “the world will rejoice”

In this case, the world was rejoicing because the people thought they had gotten rid of Jesus once and for all

It is good and right and God-honoring when we grieve that which is broken in this world

Have you ever considered that?

When you grieve at the reality of death, when you weep with a friend who just received horrible news, when sorrow reaches to the depths of your soul, you are glorifying God in that moment

Because in that moment, as you weep with those who weep (to quote Romans 12:5), you are recognizing that this world is not as it should be, and that something greater awaits!

And for all the discussion of sorrow here, it takes place in the context of Jesus’ words that “A little while, and you will see me no longer”

Within moments, Jesus would not be with them

And the absence of Jesus’ presence is, more than anything else, a cause for sorrow

So what exactly did Jesus mean?

Because it wasn’t just the disciples there who were confused by that statement

It’s tough for us to wrap our minds around as well

So what did Jesus mean when he said that they wouldn’t see him and then they would see him again?

Joy

First, hold that thought and let’s return to the promise:

The sorrows of this life will give way to a joy that can never be taken from you

Contrasted with sorrow, here is a promise of joy

You’ve probably heard me say that recurring words are some of our best hints as to the primary meaning of a passage

Four times in this passage - and seven times overall in the Upper Room Discourse - Jesus uses the word “joy”

So let’s look at a few aspects of joy

Definition of Joy

First question is: what is joy?

Ever have a word for which every definition feels inadequate

That’s how I felt this week studying and considering joy

It feels insufficient to say define it as “extreme happiness” or something purely emotive

And then there are the overly technical definitions that feel way too cerebral for a topic that should tug at our hearts like joy

CS Lewis (I’m a big fan of quoting Lewis if you haven’t picked that up already!) wrote a book, Surprised by Joy

Here is how he defined it: Joy is an “unsatisfied desire which is itself more desirable than any other condition.”

Frankly, I’m not even completely sure what he meant by that except maybe it does highlight the somehow mysterious nature of joy

Maybe instead of defining joy, we can look at the key markers of joy:

It is grounded upon God himself and derives from God

It is forward looking, anticipating the day we will be with Jesus in the New Creation

It is possible today because Jesus has given us the gift of the Holy Spirit

Grounded Upon God Himself

Let’s start with the idea that joy is grounded upon God himself and derives from God

Think about the verse I read a little bit ago

John 16:33 “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.””

It is in Jesus that we have peace, in Jesus we can find joy because he has overcome the world

But let’s keep going

John 15:11 “These things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full.”

John 17:13 “But now I am coming to you, and these things I speak in the world, that they may have my joy fulfilled in themselves.”

Or even the passage that comes immediately before

John 16:6–7 “But because I have said these things to you, sorrow has filled your heart. Nevertheless, I tell you the truth: it is to your advantage that I go away, for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you. But if I go, I will send him to you.”

Joy is possible because it is grounded in the character of God, the work of God, and the presence of God

Joy in the NT

As I was preparing, I wanted to see where else in the NT that same word of “joy” appeared

What struck me is that the word is used several times surrounding the birth of Jesus, further connecting joy to the presence of God

Matthew 2:10 “When they saw the star, they rejoiced exceedingly with great joy.”

See also Luke 1:14, Luke 1:44, Luke 2:10

And several times in connection to trials and hardship

James 1:2 “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds,”

See also 2 Corinthians 7:4, 2 Corinthians 8:2

Immediate fulfillment at the resurrection

Now we can come back to the question I posed a little bit ago:

What exactly did Jesus mean when he said “a little while, and you will see me no longer; and again a little while, and you will see me”?

Really, here is the question:

Was Jesus talking about his death and subsequent resurrection?

In other words, is Jesus saying they wouldn’t see him for a couple of days and then he would rise from the dead and they would see him?

Or was Jesus referring to his ascent into heaven and promised return?

Here is a little hint: If I ask an either/or question, the answer is probably “yes”

Was Jesus anticipating his own resurrection from the dead?

So after a couple of days in the grave (not seeing Jesus), he would rise (and they would see him again)

Look at verse 22

John 16:22 “So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you.”

But also consider the description of the women after they went to and saw the empty tomb on that first Easter morning:

Matthew 28:8 “So they departed quickly from the tomb with fear and great joy, and ran to tell his disciples.”

When the disciples encountered the risen Christ, they were filled with joy

There was a near-term (almost immediate) fulfillment to Jesus’ words where his followers would experience the joy of his presence at his resurrection

Long-term fulfillment at the parousia

But there is also long-term fulfillment at the return of Jesus

Notice in verse 17 “because I am going to the Father”

That could only be a reference to Jesus ascending back into heaven after his resurrection where, even right now, he sits at the right hand of the Father

But as he promised throughout the Upper Room Discourse

John 14:3 “And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.”

Jesus is coming again one day and will restore all that is broken, heal every sorrow, and the whole world - us included - will be filled with joy forevermore

So yes, there is both a short-term and a long-term picture as it pertains to joy in the presence of Jesus

Joy as Antidote for Sorrow

Earlier I read only part of a couple verses

Now I want to circle back and complete those

John 16:20 “Truly, truly, I say to you, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice. You will be sorrowful, but your sorrow will turn into joy.”

John 16:22 “So also you have sorrow now, but I will see you again, and your hearts will rejoice, and no one will take your joy from you.”

Jesus promises that sorrow will give way to joy

More than that, sorrow will be transformed into joy

And that joy will never be taken away

This is not a “pretend everything is ok” faux joy, but a genuine ability to find peace in the presence of God, savoring his goodness and trusting his providence

Jesus concludes this passage in verse 24, saying “that your joy may be full”

Not a half-baked joy, not an incomplete joy, not a partial joy

But a full, complete, lasting joy that cannot and will not be taken away

Can Sorrow and Joy Co-Exist

Let me ask an important and real world question for us: How do sorrow and joy co-exist?

Notice I didn’t ask, “Can they co-exist?” but “How?”

Does one fully block out the other with either sorrow swallowing joy or joy eliminating sorrow?

Sorrow runs deep, but joy is possible because of the presence of the Holy Spirit

Suffering happens, but it cannot erase the joy of the resurrection

Grief and weeping and mourning are all around us, but our joy cannot be taken from us because it is grounded in God himself

And all as we wait for, and long for, the day when our joy is not only full, but forever unshakeable

Conclusion

I opened with the story of Kim in labor with Jeremiah

And that is the picture we see here

John 16:21 “When a woman is giving birth, she has sorrow because her hour has come, but when she has delivered the baby, she no longer remembers the anguish, for joy that a human being has been born into the world.”

If we went back to Genesis 3, we would see that pain in childbirth is part of the curse of sin upon the world

As long as we are after Eden and before the New Creation, there will be pain in childbirth

And as long as we are after Eden and before the New Creation, there will be grief and sadness and mourning and lament and pain and suffering… and sorrow

A day is coming when all sorrow will be banished forever

But until that day, sorrow and joy do more than co-exist

Because on the cross of Jesus, sorrow and joy met

To quote from a song appropriately titled, Where Joy and Sorrow Meet:

“There is a place where hope remains In crowns of thorns and crimson stains And tears that fall on Jesus’ feet Where joy and sorrow meet

Until that day, we find joy in the promise that the resurrection of Jesus is true, is effective, and is for us at the moments of our greatest sorrow

We can be full of joy now, even in the midst of sorrow, because Jesus is alive and he has given his Spirit to us

And all this is true because, on the cross, sorrow and joy not only co-existed, but met

Pray

Blessing

Romans 15:13 “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.”