Flipped Righteousness (Part 4)

Flipped: Promises That Hold, Words That Mean Something

We’ve been walking through the Sermon on the Mount in our series Flipped, where Jesus turns our assumptions upside down and shows us what life in His kingdom really looks like.

Before the sermon even begins, Matthew tells us Jesus’ first message: “Repent, for the kingdom of heaven is at hand” (Matthew 4:17). Repentance is turning — changing direction because you’ve changed your mind about who is right and who is worth following.

Then Jesus sits down on the mountain as a King forming a people. The Beatitudes show us what a repentant, believing heart becomes — poor in spirit, mourning sin, meek, hungry for righteousness, merciful, pure, and peacemaking. Belief produces a Beatitude‑shaped life.

And as that life takes root, Jesus says His people become salt and light — preserving what is good and revealing what is true.

From there, Jesus begins correcting the ways we’ve misunderstood righteousness. He moves from murder to anger, from adultery to lust — always pressing deeper, not to burden us but to free us.

And now He turns to our promises and our words. Because in His kingdom, promises hold and words mean something.

Now we come to the passage for today.

Matthew 5:31–37 ““It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery. “Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely, but shall perform to the Lord what you have sworn.’ But I say to you, Do not take an oath at all, either by heaven, for it is the throne of God, or by the earth, for it is his footstool, or by Jerusalem, for it is the city of the great King. And do not take an oath by your head, for you cannot make one hair white or black. Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.”

Pray

Imagine a young couple — Evan and Marissa — sitting in a counselor’s office because their marriage has hit a hard season. They’re not unfaithful to each other. They’re just tired. Life has been busy, the kids need constant attention, work has been stressful, and somewhere along the way they stopped feeling like a team.

When the counselor asks what’s going on, the words come out slowly at first.

Marissa says, “I feel like we’re roommates. We talk, but we don’t connect. I’m carrying so much, and I don’t know how to say it without starting a fight.”

Evan looks down and adds, “I’m trying. I really am. But it feels like whatever I do isn’t enough. I miss how we used to be. I don’t want to keep disappointing her.”

Conversations turn into misunderstandings. Small frustrations pile up. They love each other, but everything feels heavier than it used to. So they schedule an appointment.

The first counselor listens carefully and finally says, “Marriage is supposed to make you happy. If you’re not happy anymore, maybe this isn’t the right relationship. People change. You deserve to feel fulfilled. If it’s not working, you can walk away.”

On the drive home, Evan can’t shake the feeling that something is off. “Marissa,” he says quietly, “I don’t know… that didn’t sit right with me. I know we’re struggling, but I don’t think the answer is just walking away. That feels too small for what we promised each other.”

Marissa nods. “I felt the same way. I don’t want to give up. I just want help.”

They talk it through — honestly, maybe more honestly than they have in months — and agree to get a second opinion.

A few days later they meet with another counselor who hears the same story and responds very differently: “Marriage can only be broken if there has been sexual immorality. Otherwise, you stay. Hard seasons aren’t grounds for leaving.”

Two counselors. Two voices. Two completely different visions of marriage.

And this is exactly the kind of debate Jesus stepped into.

Some people said marriage was mainly about personal happiness. Others said marriage was mainly about following the rules. But Jesus goes deeper than both.

He takes the conversation back to God’s heart: “From the beginning it was not so.”

Jesus isn’t just giving a ruling — He’s restoring the purpose. He’s saying:

Marriage isn’t built on shifting feelings.

Marriage isn’t held together by technicalities.

Marriage is a covenant designed to reflect God’s own faithfulness.

Jesus is getting at something bigger than “When can I leave?” He’s calling us back to why marriage exists in the first place — to display a love that endures, forgives, sacrifices, and keeps its promises.

He pulls marriage out of loopholes and legal debates and back into the heart of God — a covenant meant to reflect His faithfulness, His steadfast love, His unbreakable commitment. Marriage is a covenant, not a contract.

And with all of that in the background, Jesus begins this section of the sermon with the words, “It was also said…” (Matthew 5:31). That phrase is important. Jesus is signaling that He’s about to correct their view. He’s saying, “You’ve heard this taught. You’ve lived in this. But I’m going to show you what God meant all along.”

Just like He did with anger. Just like He did with lust. Now He does it with marriage and divorce.

Jesus isn’t attacking Scripture — He’s correcting the teaching they had been given. He’s exposing the way God’s words had been bent toward convenience and loopholes. And now He’s going to flip their expectations and show us what it means to be people whose promises hold and whose words mean something.

Now look down with me at verse 31. Jesus begins this section the same way He began the others: “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’”

Jesus is quoting what the people had heard all their lives. This wasn’t new. This was familiar. And Jesus is saying, “You’ve heard this… but you haven’t understood it.”

To understand what Jesus is correcting, we need to see where this comes from. He’s pointing back to Deuteronomy 24, where Moses addressed divorce:

“When a man… finds some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce…” (Deuteronomy 24:1–2)

And here’s the key: Moses did not command divorce — he permitted it. Jesus explains this in Matthew 19:8:

“Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so.”

That line matters. “From the beginning it was not so.”

Jesus is reminding them — and us — that divorce was never God’s design. It was a concession in a broken world, not a reflection of God’s heart.

Why? Because God is a covenant‑keeping God.

From Genesis to Revelation, God binds Himself to His people with promises He never breaks.

He keeps His covenant with Noah.

He keeps His covenant with Abraham.

He keeps His covenant with Israel.

He keeps His covenant in Christ — the New Covenant sealed in His blood.

God never abandons. God never walks away. God never treats His people as disposable.

So when marriage — a covenant meant to reflect God’s covenant — is broken lightly or casually, it misrepresents Him. Divorce is so painful in the eyes of the Lord because it goes against the very character of who He is. It distorts the picture of His faithful, steadfast love.

This is why Moses required a certificate. In the ancient world, a woman without one was left in limbo — unable to remarry, unable to return home, socially and economically exposed. The certificate was meant to protect her, not to encourage divorce.

The certificate was meant to slow divorce down, not speed it up. It was meant to guard the vulnerable, not free the powerful. It was meant to restrain sin, not justify it.

But by Jesus’ day, the religious leaders had flipped Moses’ intention. They treated the certificate as permission — as long as you filled out the paperwork, you were righteous. Divorce had become an outward act you could justify with the right form.

So Jesus says, “You’ve heard this said…” You’ve heard the outward rule. You’ve heard the technical requirement. You’ve heard the loophole.

But then comes the contrast that shapes this whole section: “But I say to you…” (Matthew 5:32)

Jesus isn’t contradicting Moses. He’s correcting the interpretation they had been given and the perception that they had been living under.

He’s moving the issue from the hands to the heart. From the paperwork to the promise. From the legal to the relational. From the certificate to the covenant.

Now watch the key terms in verse 32.

Jesus says, “Everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality…” The word for “sexual immorality” is porneia — a broad term that includes serious covenant‑breaking unfaithfulness. Jesus is not talking about minor offenses or personal disappointments. He’s talking about a deep violation of the marriage covenant.

Then He says that divorcing for lesser reasons “makes her commit adultery.” That sounds harsh until you understand the culture. In that world, a divorced woman almost always had to remarry to survive. So if a man divorced his wife for trivial reasons, he was forcing her into a situation where she would be treated as if she had broken the covenant — even though he was the one who broke it.

Jesus is saying: “You think divorce is just an outward action. You think it’s just paperwork. You think it’s just a legal transaction. But I’m telling you — it’s a heart issue.”

A heart that looks for loopholes is not a faithful heart. A heart that treats people as disposable is not a kingdom heart. A heart that breaks covenant lightly does not reflect the God who keeps covenant faithfully.

Jesus is not tightening the law to trap people. He’s restoring the meaning of a promise.

He’s saying, “In My kingdom, promises hold.” So Jesus is restoring the meaning of covenant, not tightening rules to trap people.

Just as marriage reveals covenant faithfulness, our everyday speech reveals it too.

And in the very next breath — in verses 33–37 — He moves from our promises to our words, because in His kingdom, words mean something.

Now look back down at vs 33 with me because Jesus continues the same pattern we’ve seen throughout this chapter. Over and over He has said:

“You have heard that it was said…”

And then, “But I say to you…”

We’ve heard that pattern in Matthew 5:21, 5:27, 5:31, and now again in 5:33. Jesus keeps repeating it because He is correcting their understanding and their perception — and likely ours as well. They had heard the Law, but they had not heard the heart of the Law.

And now He turns from marriage promises to everyday speech.

Jesus says, “Again you have heard that it was said to those of old, ‘You shall not swear falsely…’”

That command comes straight from the ninth commandment: “You shall not bear false witness…” (Exodus 20:16).

God has always cared about truthful speech because God Himself is truth.

His character is truth.

His Word is truth.

His covenant is truth.

His promises are true.

So when God’s people twist words, shade the truth, or use oaths to manipulate others, they misrepresent the God whose name they bear.

Now look again at the text vs 34 and watch the progression Jesus exposes — a whole system of graded oaths designed to make your words sound weighty while still giving you an escape hatch.

Do you see the progression? Heaven → Earth → Jerusalem → Your own head. High → Medium → Low → Lowest. All designed to make your words sound serious without actually binding you to anything.

Jesus is saying: “You’ve built a whole system to make your words sound true without actually being true.”

And then He gives the kingdom alternative — the heart of the matter — in Matthew 5:37:

“Let what you say be simply ‘Yes’ or ‘No’; anything more than this comes from evil.”

In other words:

Let your yes be a real yes.

Let your no be a real no.

Let your words stand on their own.

Let your integrity carry the weight — not your oaths.

Why?

Because God is in control of all things. You don’t own heaven. You don’t own earth. You don’t own Jerusalem. You don’t even own yourself.

And because God is a covenant‑keeping, truth‑telling God, His people must reflect His character.

Just as marriage is a covenant meant to reflect God’s covenant‑keeping nature, our speech is meant to reflect God’s truth‑telling nature.

In His kingdom:

Promises hold. Words mean something.

Gospel Invitation

When you step back from Jesus’ words about marriage and about oaths, you see more than commands — you see a King revealing the heart of His kingdom. A kingdom where promises hold. A kingdom where words mean something. A kingdom shaped by God’s own faithfulness and truth.

And His teaching exposes all of us.

Some of you hear these words and feel conviction. You know where your promises have slipped. You know where your words have been careless. You know where your heart has drifted.

Jesus is not pushing you away — He is calling you back. The King who commands faithfulness is the King who restores it. He disciplines those He loves and invites them to return.

Others hear Jesus’ words and realize you’ve never entered this kingdom at all. You’ve tried to manage life on your own terms. You’ve made promises you couldn’t keep. You’ve spoken words you couldn’t back up.

And Jesus is telling you the truth: You cannot live this kingdom life without the King.

The flipped kingdom isn’t something you achieve — it’s something you receive through repentance and faith.

One King. One invitation. Two responses.

The same King who calls us to covenant faithfulness in Matthew 5 is the King who knocks in Revelation 3:19-20

“Those whom I love, I reprove and discipline, so be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me.”

That is the invitation of the flipped kingdom.

To the believer: open the door again. To the unbeliever: open the door for the first time.

Turn to the King. Trust the King. Enter the flipped kingdom where Jesus makes broken people whole.

The door is open today.