The Measure of a Man

Genesis 27:1–4 NET

When Isaac was old and his eyes were so weak that he was almost blind, he called his older son Esau and said to him, “My son!” “Here I am!” Esau replied. Isaac said, “Since I am so old, I could die at any time.Therefore, take your weapons—your quiver and your bow—and go out into the open fields and hunt down some wild game for me. Then prepare for me some tasty food, the kind I love, and bring it to me. Then I will eat it so that I may bless you before I die.”

Genesis 27:

Genesis 27:15–23 NET

Then Rebekah took her older son Esau’s best clothes, which she had with her in the house, and put them on her younger son Jacob. She put the skins of the young goats on his hands and the smooth part of his neck. Then she handed the tasty food and the bread she had made to her son Jacob. He went to his father and said, “My father!” Isaac replied, “Here I am. Which are you, my son?”Jacob said to his father, “I am Esau, your firstborn. I’ve done as you told me. Now sit up and eat some of my wild game so that you can bless me.”But Isaac asked his son, “How in the world did you find it so quickly, my son?” “Because the Lord your God brought it to me,” he replied.Then Isaac said to Jacob, “Come closer so I can touch you, my son, and know for certain if you really are my son Esau.”So Jacob went over to his father Isaac, who felt him and said, “The voice is Jacob’s, but the hands are Esau’s.” He did not recognize him because his hands were hairy, like his brother Esau’s hands. So Isaac blessed Jacob.

Genesis 28:10–17 NET

Meanwhile Jacob left Beer Sheba and set out for Haran. He reached a certain place where he decided to camp because the sun had gone down. He took one of the stones and placed it near his head. Then he fell asleep in that place and had a dream. He saw a stairway erected on the earth with its top reaching to the heavens. The angels of God were going up and coming down it and the Lord stood at its top. He said, “I am the Lord, the God of your grandfather Abraham and the God of your father Isaac. I will give you and your descendants the ground you are lying on. Your descendants will be like the dust of the earth, and you will spread out to the west, east, north, and south. All the families of the earth will pronounce blessings on one another using your name and that of your descendants.I am with you! I will protect you wherever you go and will bring you back to this land. I will not leave you until I have done what I promised you!” Then Jacob woke up and thought, “Surely the Lord is in this place, but I did not realize it!” He was afraid and said, “What an awesome place this is! This is nothing else than the house of God! This is the gate of heaven!”

There’s a bit of back story missing from these events.

[Explain how Jacob acquired Esau’s birth right, and Esau is now trying to steal it back.]

Most interesting of all, though, is the way gender norms are present in this interaction

Esau - Hairy, outdoorsy, works with his hands, a REAL MAN(tm) is his father’s favorite. So much so that Isaac is ready to give him what rightly belongs to Jacob.

Jacob - smooth skinned. Stays at home and cooks (not a manly thing to do). Is his mother’s favorite. So much so that Rebekah is ready to deceive her husband to help Jacob get what’s coming to him.

Assumptions about what makes for a real man are so tightly woven into the fabric of this story, they’re impossible to ignore. It’s not just their personalities. It extends to the way the two brothers operate in this story. Esau goes out hunting, prepared to make something of himself on his own. Like a man. Jacob instead resorts to trickery and cunning - which are women’s tactics - and lets his mother do much of his work for him.

When Jacob’s womanly behavior results in his receiving the birth right and Esau being left with nothing but a bowl of soup - appropriate, no? - their natures again take hold. Esau does what comes naturally to him, setting out to take it back by force - he’s ready to kill Jacob if he has to. Jacob, too, does what comes naturally to him, and runs away.

Which brings us to the part of the story that surely would have offended the tribes of shepherds and hunters who first heard it. God shows up and blesses one of the brothers. But it’s not hairy, burly, hot-headed Esau, who handles his business and his problems like a REAL MAN. It’s that scheming, conniving, cowardly, womanly Jacob. God appears to him and makes the same promise that he made first to Abraham, and then to Isaac: I’m giving you and your descendants this land. You will become a great nation and your offspring will be too many to count. I have chosen you to be the father of my people.

God is not interested in Esau’s potent masculinity. There are no Divine standards for what makes a real man. What God wants is someone who actively pursues God’s blessing, and refuses to give it up for any reason. Jacob fits that bill. Esau does not. Although their friends and neighbors probably all agree that Esau is the better man, it is Jacob who finds favor with God, because instead of seeking to fit others’ mold, he seizes the gifts God has given him and uses them to chase after God.

We like to think we live in a more enlightened society than did Jacob and Esau. Perhaps we do, but the same toxic form of masculinity which blinded Esau to God’s promises is certainly alive and well today. We continue to judge men favorably for exhibiting traits of “manliness,” and criticize women for the same. Perhaps it’s time we learned the lesson God is teaching us through the story of Jacob and Esau: The true measure of a person is not determined by how well the fit a prescribed gender role, but by how fiercely they chase after the blessings God has to offer. When it comes to that standard, how do you measure up?