Stop Grumbling! Start Groaning!

Jim and Bill received layoff notices from their employer, an insurance company that was being downsized by its new owner. “Once again the little man gets squeezed,” sighed Bill; “Is this the thanks I get for 15 years of loyal service?”

“Yeah, this stinks,” replied Jim, “but God is still with us if we continue to trust Him, even in hard times.” “Seriously?” blurted Bill. “Faith isn’t going to keep a roof over our heads or feed our kids. Where is God now? Why won’t He protect what He knows we deserve? I wish I had looked out for myself—inflated my commissions like everyone else—at least I’d have a little nest egg built up.”

Jim and Bill illustrate the difference between groaning and grumbling. There is a distinction between groaning and grumbling in the Bible. It’s important to know the difference between the two because one connects us to God and the other one disconnects us.

Groaning is what we do when we are suffering. We go to God and tell Him to His face, what is bothering us. When we do that, we respect God’s sovereignty, because even though we are suffering, we understand God is in control. Groaning is God centered. Grumbling, on the other hand, is what we do when people or circumstances in our lives don’t meet our expectations. We go behind God’s back and complain to people who will listen to us. Grumbling is self-centered.

I am stunned every time I read the story of the exodus. How can the people of Israel complain like they do? How could they be so ignorant, so stupid, so forgetful?

The God of the universe had just tossed around the most powerful man on the face of the earth like a toddler with a rag doll. God didn’t just humble Pharaoh; he broke his spirit and revealed Pharaoh’s impotence. A slave people and their God left him and his nation in shambles. This display of power sent vibrations throughout the world, inspiring fear and awe.

Yet Israel’s response to this spectacular deliverance from Egypt is not mainly praise, worship, and wholehearted trust. Instead, Israel responds with grumbling — complaining, murmuring, quarreling. “No water, Moses! Where’s the beef, Moses? I have blisters on my feet, Moses. Who died and made you boss? Are we there yet, Moses?”

Spiritual amnesia set in quickly and covered the eyes of Israel’s hearts. So soon had they forgotten God’s gracious and miraculous deliverance?This spiritual amnesia — forgetting God’s deliverance and provision — is a deadly disease. The people of Israel, on the heels of unthinkable miracles, with their pockets full of Egyptian jewelry, grumble at their less-than-five-star accommodations in the desert. This wasn’t just headache-induced grumbling or low-blood-sugar complaining. This was faithlessness. It is the heart that says, “I know better than God. If only he would follow my plan.”

And yet that’s my heart and yours. “Where’s the dinner, honey? Leftovers again? Where’s the protein? Is that all you got done today? Can you change the dirty diaper? What’s this sticky stuff on the chair?” I can be just like the people of Israel. “I know you’ve forgiven all my sins at the cross, rescued me from eternal conscious torment, and given me everlasting joy in your presence, but all we have for dinner is ramen or Cheerios.”

Grumbling distorts our past.

What we remember is not exactly where we came from. As one author states “are blinded by nostalgia.” “If only we could get back to those great days in the 60’s. If only we could have the Great Society. If only we could have these poverty programs. That would be it”, and people on the right think, “If only we could get back to the Reagan Revolution. If only we could turn back the clock to 1981.” In both cases, he says, people are blinded by nostalgia.

It’s not that we don’t have anything to learn from the past, but we tend to remember a golden age that didn’t really exist. The good old days weren’t always so good. Listen, if you tend to complain about everything now, chances are that you complained about everything back then—whenever then was. Back when you were in college—back when you were single—back when you had no kids—back when all your kids were in the house—those were the days. Yes, there are blessings and a sense of loss. Yes, things change, but the good old days weren’t always so good.

Grumbling exaggerates the present

Exodus 16:3 ESV

and the people of Israel said to them, “Would that we had died by the hand of the Lord in the land of Egypt, when we sat by the meat pots and ate bread to the full, for you have brought us out into this wilderness to kill this whole assembly with hunger.”

But notice something in

Exodus 17:3 ESV

But the people thirsted there for water, and the people grumbled against Moses and said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt, to kill us and our children and our livestock with thirst?”

. They have one more grumble session in . “But the people thirsted there for water, and the people grumbled against Moses and said, “Why did you bring us up out of Egypt to kill us and our children and our livestock with thirst?” Their livestock are still with them. They have all of their immense flocks and herds. Back in , they’re not exactly on the brink of starvation. They can milk their animals. They could make cheese. They probably didn’t know how to make ice cream, but that would have been nice too. If they were really starving, they had a lot of meat they could have eaten if they killed their own animals. So we’re not talking about needs so much as wants.

Their livestock are still with them. They have all of their immense flocks and herds. Back in , they’re not exactly on the brink of starvation. They could have milked their animals if they were thirsty. If they were really starving, they had a lot of meat they could have eaten if they killed their own animals. So we’re not talking about needs so much as wants.

Grumbling is not ultimately the heart’s response to circumstances, but to God.

The problem with grumblers is that they don’t really trust that God is big enough to help and good enough to care.

Grumbling, whining, and thanklessness are not ultimately the heart’s responses to circumstances, but to God. Israel grumbled at their enslavement, grumbled when Moses came on the scene, and still grumbled as they wandered safely in the wilderness. Their complaining wasn’t rooted in their scenery, but their heart.

The same is true for you. A heart of gratitude and thankfulness isn’t dependent on your bank statement, doctor’s diagnosis, or the praise you receive for a job well done. Thanklessness and grumbling — regardless of your situation, even your suffering — reflect your heart. They are sin. Spiritual amnesia is a deadly disease that threatens your faith and your joy more than any cancer. It penetrates to the core and rots your heart from within.

How can we guard ourselves from this spiritual forgetfulness? How can we root out the cancer that threatens our joy and faith? Very simply the antidote is to remember. Remember God’s gracious deliverance and redemption. Establish it in your memory. Memorialize it. Paint it on the walls of your house. Journal it and reread it each morning.

God gives us this pattern in the exodus. Israel has just been given their menu for the next forty years: manna from heaven. Gather six days, a double portion on the last, and rest on the Sabbath. But then God commands Moses to take an omer of manna (about two quarts) and keep it in a jar as a reminder of God’s faithfulness ().

There are two miracles here. The obvious is that God fed a couple million people with manna from heaven for forty years. No gluten allergies, no low-carb diet, and no lack of vital nutrients. God sustains his people miraculously to teach them he can and will provide their daily bread — everything they need.

The second is that the manna in the jar did not spoil as it normally would (). God kept the manna from spoiling to remind Israel that he not only keeps manna from spoiling, but that he will keep his people alive, even in the wilderness. This jar of white flakes was to be an enduring reminder that God provides. He provides in the exodus from Egypt, and he provides in the desert wasteland.

God is saying the same thing to you. Since we’re inclined to grumble, to be thankless, and to complain about our circumstances, God graciously reminds us that we must remember his gracious redemption and provision.

“Take a moment and look back on God’s fingerprints all over your life.”

Remember how God has protected you from making shipwreck of your life.

Remember how God has protected you from making shipwreck of your life. Remember how God graciously let you grow up in a godly family.

Remember how God graciously let you grow up in a godly family.

Remember how God awakened you to the ugliness of your sin.

Remember how you walked away from that terrible car crash.

Remember how your wife, sister, or mom survived breast cancer.

Remember how you had mentors and key friends guide you in your faith.

Remember how God sustained you during that season of unemployment.

Remember how God miraculously healed you.

Remember that impossible prayer request that God answered.

Remember how you had no money and an envelope just showed up in the mail with exactly the amount you needed.

Remember how the gospel came alive as it never had before.

Remember God.

The antidote to spiritual amnesia is making every effort to recall and remember God’s gracious deliverance. The fact that you — a sinner who was an enemy of God — are now a beloved child is a miracle. Don’t let that wonder ever fade. Remember.

Let this act of remembering awaken in you joy in God and a deep sense of gratitude that God loves you, knows you, and keeps you.

You will kill groaning by remembering.

Our Lord has given a way of expressing our emotions that guards us from sin and glorifies His sovereignty.

We must stop grumbling and start groaning. God understands that our human condition is fraught with pain and sorrow.

) Can you believe it? Even God groans! In fact, His whole creation groans: “We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.” ()Do we need to stop grumbling? Yes! How can we stop grumbling? We can replace grumbling with gratitude. When we look for things to be grateful for, we remember that God is in charge and everything is as it should be, so there is nothing to complain about!

Romans 8:26 ESV

Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

Can you believe it? Even God groans! In fact, His whole creation groans:

)Do we need to stop grumbling? Yes! How can we stop grumbling? We can replace grumbling with gratitude. When we look for things to be grateful for, we remember that God is in charge and everything is as it should be, so there is nothing to complain about!

Romans 8:22 ESV

For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now.

Groaning does not impugn God with wrong. Rather, it is an honest, expression of what it’s like to experience the trouble, anguish, and grief of living in this fallen, futile world

Romans 8:20–23 ESV

For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies.

). God does not mind this kind of complaining. In fact, he encourages it — and teaches us how to do it in the Bible.

God does not mind groaning. In fact, he encourages it — and teaches us how to do it in the Bible.

Psalm 142:1–2 ESV

With my voice I cry out to the Lord; with my voice I plead for mercy to the Lord. I pour out my complaint before him; I tell my trouble before him.

Most of these biblical and righteous complaints are contained in what we call the psalms of lament. The Book of Psalms contains the prayers and hymns that God chose to teach us how to express ourselves to him in worship. About one-third of these psalms are laments. And they are precious gifts from God.

In these laments, the writers pour out to God their

sorrow ()

anger ()

fear ()

longing ()

confusion ()

desolation ()

repentance ()

disappointment ()

depression ()

These psalms are expressions of God’s profound and deep compassion for us

James 5:11 ESV

Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast. You have heard of the steadfastness of Job, and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful.

He knows that we frequently will experience bewildering pain and therefore will frequently need to express our pain to him.

God wants us to pour out our complaints to him and tell him our troubles

Psalm 142:2 ESV

I pour out my complaint before him; I tell my trouble before him.

). He wants us to do it privately, like David did when he wrote in the cave of Adullam (). And he wants us to do it corporately, as when the people of Israel would sing together.

He wants us to do it privately, like David did when he wrote in the cave of Adullam (). And he wants us to do it corporately, as when the people of Israel would sing together.

He wants us to tell him exactly what it feels like, as when David exclaimed,

.

And he wants us to remember that despite how things look and feel right now, because of his very great promises

2 Peter 1:4 ESV

by which he has granted to us his precious and very great promises, so that through them you may become partakers of the divine nature, having escaped from the corruption that is in the world because of sinful desire.

, someday these troubles will no longer afflict us, as when David expressed his hope: “You will deal bountifully with me” ().

someday these troubles will no longer afflict us, as when David expressed his hope:

Psalm 142:7 ESV

Bring me out of prison, that I may give thanks to your name! The righteous will surround me, for you will deal bountifully with me.

).

The psalms of lament are treasures for the saints. They give inspired voice to our troubled souls. They model for us how to complain to God in a way that honors him. And they are themselves expressions of God’s merciful care for us, because in them we see that we are not as alone as we feel, and that God indeed does understand.

And if we have ears to hear, these psalms will also guard us from expecting too much in this age. God does not always intend his saints to experience prosperity. Rather, the psalms of lament remind us of the truth of Jesus’s statement,

John 16:33 ESV

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

). So go ahead and complain to God, but don’t grumble. Learn from the lamenting psalmists how to be a faithful complainer.

So go ahead and groan to God, but don’t grumble. Learn from the lamenting psalmists how to be a faithful groaner.

Deal with and express your emotions rightly through groaning.

Don’t let your feelings inform your faith but inform you feeling by your faith; remember.

Kill the sin of grumbling with singing and scripture.

In grumbling we rebel against God. In groaning we run to God.