Covenant and Faithfulness

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INTRODUCTION

One of the things that happens often after I teach is someone will walk up to me and ask, Were you talking directly to me today? And my answer is always, No.

But what they were feeling in that moment was conviction.

The Holy Spirit was revealing something in their heart.

That’s important because many people misunderstand the teachings of Jesus, especially passages like the one we will address today

They assume Jesus is trying to condemn people, shame people, or push broken people away.

But Jesus teaches differently.

Jesus does not reveal things to destroy us.

He reveals things so He can heal us.

Throughout the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus keeps moving beneath surface behavior and into the deeper condition of the heart.

Not because He hates people, but because He loves them too much to leave them unchanged.

So today, if you feel conviction, don’t confuse that with condemnation.

Condemnation says:

You are beyond hope.

Conviction says:

There is something broken that Jesus wants to restore.

PRAY

TENSION

Most people don’t enter marriage planning for divorce.

No one stands at an altar imagining betrayal, distance, resentment, or heartbreak.

Yet almost everyone has been touched by relational brokenness:

divorce

abandonment

infidelity

emotional distance

family fracture

regret

We live in a culture that swings between two extremes:

treating marriage casually

or treating divorced people shamefully

Jesus does neither.

He elevates covenant relationship without crushing broken people

We often want covenant benefits without covenant formation.

We want:

intimacy without sacrifice

commitment without surrender

closeness without transformation

Cant teach an old dog new tricks

But covenant relationships expose us

Marriage reveals:

selfishness

pride

insecurity

unforgiveness

control

emotional distance

Marriage problems are often heart problems hiding…

TRUTH

Matthew 5:31–32 “You have heard the law that says, ‘A man can divorce his wife by merely giving her a written notice of divorce.’ But I say that a man who divorces his wife, unless she has been unfaithful, causes her to commit adultery. And anyone who marries a divorced woman also commits adultery.”

Jesus is exposing how people had reduced God’s commands down to technical loopholes

During Jesus’ day, religious leaders debated acceptable reasons for divorce.

The conversation had shifted from:

How do we honor covenant? to…

What’s the minimum requirement to get out of it?

Some rabbis allowed divorce for extremely trivial reasons

By the time of Jesus:

the debate was no longer, How do we protect the covenant?

but

What are acceptable reasons to exit covenant?

That’s why in Matthew 19:3 the Pharisees ask:

Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any reason?

They were essentially asking Jesus:

Which rabbinical school do You agree with?

The School of Shammai says: A man may not divorce his wife unless he has found sexual immorality in her.

The School of Hillel says: He may divorce her even if she spoiled his food.

Rabbi Akiva says: Even if he found another woman more attractive than her. 

Why It Matters for Jesus’ Teaching

When Jesus speaks about divorce in Matthew 5 and Matthew 19, He is speaking into an already active rabbinical debate.

The religious leaders weren’t asking:

Does marriage matter?

They were debating:

Under what conditions can a man legally end it?

Think about how this passage now fits into the conversation

last week we learned…

anger fractures relationships internally

lust erodes faithfulness internally

divorce often becomes the visible fruit of deeper unseen fractures

So instead of talking only about divorce

Let me speak to the importance of marriage

Marriage points beyond itself

Genesis 2:24 “This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”

Marriage was never merely legal

It was spiritual

Ephesians 5 Paul says marriage reflects:

Christ’s love for the Church

sacrificial faithfulness

covenant commitment

Marriage is not merely about personal happiness

It is designed to point people towards Jesus

That does not mean marriage is ultimate.

Jesus is ultimate.

Some of you hear this topic and immediately feel pain, regret, grief, or shame.

Maybe you were betrayed.

Maybe you were abandoned.

Maybe your marriage ended despite every effort you made.

Maybe divorce was part of your story long before you knew Jesus.

Please hear me clearly:

Jesus is not weaponizing Scripture against wounded people.

He is revealing the beauty and sacredness of a covenant relationship because people matter deeply to God

Scripture itself acknowledges the complexity of broken relationships.

sexual immorality (Matthew 5:32),

abandonment (1 Corinthians 7),

hardness of heart, (Matthew 19)

safety realities in abusive situations.

No where in scripture is Jesus calling people to remain trapped in abuse or destruction

APPLICATION | FACTS

1. Marriage requires ongoing surrender

Healthy marriages are not sustained merely by promises

They are sustained by transformed hearts

Every relationship drifts without intentional surrender

Questions:

Where has selfishness taken root?

Where has resentment gone unresolved?

Where have convenience and comfort replaced covenant?

What have I normalized that Jesus wants to heal?

2. Faithfulness begins long before crisis

Most broken marriages do not collapse overnight

They erode slowly through:

hidden resentment

emotional disengagement

pride

secrecy

lust

neglect

3. Jesus can restore what is broken

The Gospel is not:

Perfect people stay married.

The Gospel is:

Broken people can be redeemed by Jesus.

Jesus is faithful even when humanity has not been.

Jesus does not stand over broken people with condemnation.

He stands before us inviting transformation, healing, faithfulness, and grace.