Loving the Unlovable

Loving the Unlovable (slide)

Have you ever had someone in your life that feels like sandpaper to you? That every interaction seems to rub you the wrong way?

Well, sandpaper has a purpose. It smooths rough edges. God sometimes uses sandpaper people to smooth our rough edges, teaching us patience, humility, and Christlike love. This sets the tone for this series love when it is hard: A call to Christlike perseverance. It is not optional to love difficult people, God uses these people and relationships to shape us.

(Illustration) I once read a story about a janitor and an angry professor. . . set in a well known Christian college, the janitor worked the night shift and had a song on his lips and the love of Christ in his heart daily, and the professor was angry and and storming the halls and slamming doors nightly muttering complaints, most of the staff avoided him, but not the janitor. He greeted him warmly every night and cleaned up after him without complaint and even prayed for him quietly as he swept the floor. One night the professor stopped and asked the janitor why are you always kind to me, I am not kind to you? And the janitor replied to him, Because Jesus was kind to me, when I wasn’t kind to Him. Months later that professor came to Christ —and he said it began with the janitor’s undeserved love. The point of the story is loving the unlovable is not about their behavior; it’s about reflecting Christ’s heart.

God Loved Us When We Were Unlovable

I know I have Rom5:8 up there, but to keep in context lets back up to Romans 5:6–8 “For while we were still helpless, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die. But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.”

Christ didn’t wait for us to clean up, mature, or become pleasant

He loved us “while we were still sinners.”

We were spiritually hostile, stubborn, self-centered —yet He pursued us.

When we forget how God loved us, we become stingy with love toward others.

Key truth: Remembering God’s mercy fuels our mercy.

Loving Hard People Reflects God’s Nature (Lk6:32-36)

Luke 6:32–36 ““If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. “If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. “If you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same amount. “But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High; for He Himself is kind to ungrateful and evil men. “Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.”

Jesus asks “What credit is it if you love those who love you?” Anyone can do that. But loving the difficult, the draining, the different –that’s divine

God is kind to the ungrateful and evil

When we love the unlovable, we show the world what God is like. §We become a living picture of His grace

Key truth: Loving difficult people is not about them being lovable –it’s about us being Christlike.

Love depends on God’s strength, not our capacity

Some people drain us. Some people hurt us. Some test every ounce of patience we have.

Good news: Jesus never asked us to love in our own strength.

The Spirit produces love in us (Gal5:23)

God supplies what we lack (Php4:19)

We love from His love, not toward our own limits (1Jn4:19)

Key truth: God never commands what He does not empower. (Lk24:49; implied)

Application - How do we love the unlovable

Pray for them daily. You cannot stay bitter toward someone you consistently pray for.

Look for one small act of kindness. A text, a smile, a gesture —love grows through small seeds.

Remember their story. Hard people often have hard histories. Compassion grows when we consider their wounds.

Set healthy boundaries when needed. Loving someone doesn’t mean enabling sin or abuse.

Ask god to change your heart first. The Spirit often works in us before He works through us.

(conclusion)

Loving the unlovable is not easy - but it is holy.

It is not natural - but it is supernatural.

It is not comfortable —but it is Christlike.

When we love difficult people, we preach a sermon without words. We show the world the God who loved us at our worst. We become living testimonies of grace.

This is the call of Christ. This is the heart of the gospel. This is the love that changes the world.

Major Takeaway