Marriage Sermon

Kevin asks – “Who gives this woman to be married to this man?”

   Response: “Her mother and I.”

Welcome: Pray for God’s blessing.

All sufficient merit

To Grant and Averi:

Grant:

Fall 2023 - Free Chic-fil-a

Didn’t know if you were gonna stick around.

You did.

Invitation to Discipleship

Qualities:

Enthusiasm

Teachable: Seek wise counsel

What I’ve seen develop:

Mission: Invest in making disciples.

Integrity

Willingness to clear up relationships.

Averi:

Met 2 years ago.

1st time I spoke with Averi…

Join a group of us on campus to share the gospel.

Went on her own to go share the gospel.

Last summer: Internship.

Leap of faith.

Moved.

Passion for sharing the gospel.

Heart to disciple younger girls.

I also see how you have already helped Grant make wise decisions.

“Yea, she’s right.”

Pre-Marriage Counseling

Commitment to do things God’s way.

Seek him first and stand on his Word.

I’m excited to see the impact.

Reading

Ephesians 5:22–33 ESV

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, because we are members of his body. “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Introduction: The Calling of Marriage

Marriage is a high calling

The World’s Perspective:

"Marriage is about my happiness."

"Marriage will 'complete me.'"

The Biblical Reality:

A picture of Christ and the Church.

Marriage is more about your holiness than your happiness.

There will be great happiness and joy.

But if you keep in mind that marriage is about more than just your happiness, you won’t give up when things are hard.

Charge to the Wife (Ephesians 5:22–24)

Averi, I turn to you first:

This passage addresses the wife first.

You are a living picture of the Church (the body of Christ).

The Call to Submit:

God is calling the wife to submit to her husband.

It doesn’t say you are his slave, or that you are inferior.

But it does say the husband is the head. He is the leader.

In the same way the church submits to Christ, you are to submit to your husband.

A Specific Choice:

By choosing Grant McQueen to be your husband, you are choosing him as your head, your leader.

Part of your calling is to follow him as he seeks to follow the Lord.

This requires you to trust in the Lord—that God will be leading you through Grant.

What does this look like practically, Averi?

Pray: Pray for God to lead him.

Encourage:  In times when he doubts himself, remind him that God hasn’t just called him to try to be the head—God has made him the head. It is part of his identity.

Speak up: Share your perspective and opinions as you help him make decisions.

Grant will ultimately be held accountable before God for the decisions made and the direction of your life, but your insights will be priceless.

Charge to the Husband (Ephesians 5:25)

Grant, your calling:

By choosing Averi Yanney, you are taking her to be your body, whom you care for and cherish as your own.

You are called to love her in a very specific way.

"Being in Love" vs. True Love:

Often we think of "being in love" as that warm, fuzzy, infatuated feeling when a special person is around.

That is a special thing, and can be a great thing—but that is different than how you are called to love Averi.

The Standard of Christ:

You are called to love her "as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her."

What did Christ do for the church? He gave up his own comfort, endured pain, and gave up his life.

This is the true picture of love (1 John 3:16): "By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us..."

What does this look like practically, Grant?

Study her: Find out her needs, her interests, and her concerns, and see how the Lord would have you meet those.

Seek God: Meet with the Lord regularly to seek His leading for you and your family.

Navigate conflict well: When tension comes up, refuse the temptation to resort to either extreme—domineering or going passive.

Concluding Thoughts & The Covenant (Ephesians 5:33)

The Teamwork of Marriage:

Grant: By loving Averi as Christ loves the church, you make her job to follow you easier.

Averi: As you humbly submit to Grant, it makes his job to love you and lay his life down easier.

When You Get Off Track:

When your spouse is off track, let it never be an excuse to go slack on your own role.

You will both have times when you do a poor job.

When you mess up, fess up. Ask for forgiveness.

Seek the Holy Spirit, who will give you the power to fulfill your calling.

The Core Questions (Verse 33):

"Let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband."

Does this mean a wife doesn't need to love, or a husband doesn't need to respect? No.

This is speaking about a general, deep longing you will each have.

Averi’s daily question: "Does Grant really love me?"

Grant’s daily question: "Does Averi really respect me?"

Seek to mutually meet those felt needs through both your words and actions.

The Vows and The Covenant:

You are about to enter a covenant.

A promise to unite together as long as you both shall live.

Just as Christ made an unbreakable covenant with the church, you are entering a covenant with each other.

Verse 31: "The two shall become one flesh."

You are saying to one another: "I love you so much, I want to covenant with you in marriage."

The Declaration of Intent (The "I Do")

Transition:

You ready to make some vows?

Before you make these sacred promises to one another, I ask you now to declare your intentions before God and these witnesses.

To Grant:

"Grant, will you have Averi to be your wedded wife, to live together in the holy covenant of marriage? Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?"

Grant responds: "I will." (or "I do.")

To Averi:

"Averi, will you have Grant to be your wedded husband, to live together in the holy covenant of marriage? Will you love him, comfort him, honor and keep him, in sickness and in health, and forsaking all others, be faithful to him as long as you both shall live?"

Averi responds: "I will." (or "I do.")

The Vows

Charge to Grant:

As husband you will provide for Averi’s needs. She will be the special object of your care, and your truest friend.

Grant, please make your vows to Averi by repeating after me:

Grant's Vows (Line by line):

“I Grant take you, Averi,

To be my lawfully wedded wife

Forsaking all others

In sickness and in health

For richer or for poorer

’Til death do us part

We will be one person under God

And I promise my love to you forevermore.”

Charge to Averi:

As wife you will be Grant’s encourager and greatest supporter. You will be his companion and truest friend.

Averi, please make your vows to Grant by repeating after me:

Averi's Vows (Line by line):

“I Averi take you, Grant,

To be my lawfully wedded husband

Forsaking all others

In sickness and in health

For richer or for poorer

’Til death do us part

We will be one person under God

And I promise my love to you forevermore.”

Exchange of Rings

The Symbol:

Grant and Averi, you have rings to exchange today as an outward symbol of your spiritual bond.

Grant's Ring Placement:

Grant, place the ring on Averi’s finger and repeat after me:

“With this ring I pledge my love… my life… and my faithfulness to you.”

Averi's Ring Placement:

Averi, place the ring on Grant’s finger and repeat after me:

“With this ring I pledge my love… my life… and my faithfulness to you.”

Prayer of Blessing

God the Creator:

You are the Creator and Sustainer. You built this... you will sustain it.

The Need for Grace:

A lot has been said today; give them the grace to remember it and live it out.

Fill this home with your grace, love, and forgiveness through the Holy Spirit’s power.

Specific Requests:

Make them more like Christ daily.

Let their marriage be a witness of your goodness to the world.

Use them to advance your kingdom.

Grant them deep joy as they do life together.

Thank you for your goodness and kindness.

AMEN.

Pronouncement & Presentation

The Pronouncement:

By the power entrusted to me through the Gospel of Jesus Christ, I pronounce you husband and wife.

Grant, you may kiss the bride!

The Introduction:

It’s my great privilege to get to introduce to you, for the very first time...

Mr. & Mrs. Grant and Averi McQueen!

Announcements