Take The Limits Off

We can’t dehumanize this topic because this topic isn’t about issues, it’s about real people. People who are created in the image of God. People who Jesus literally came to die for. People who have passions, hopes, dreams and desires. It’s a real person that chooses to hold hands or kiss someone else. WE can’t dehumanize the person who chooses to hold hands or kiss someone else. No, that’s not an issue, that’s a person

People are changing within our culture.

My parent’s generation would be appalled and outraged by some of what will be said today. They would be beside themselves knowing that we live in a society where’s it’s become increasingly acceptable to embrace the LGBT community. But now we have a generation that doesn’t understand why people would be so opposed to someone being who they are. We have a generation that truly doesn’t see anything wrong with our LGBTQ friends and are very comfortable with others who live this way. The cultural landscape is changing.

People are changing their biblical interpretation

Twenty years ago, a debate about the Christian view of homosexual behavior could be settled by simply quoting the Bible and using cute one sentence platitudes to shut people. But this is no longer true. You may find this shocking, but most books written about what the Bible says about same-sex relations conclude that the Bible does not prohibit consensual, monogamous, same-sex relations. This doesn’t mean they’re right. (I don’t believe they are.) What it means is that many scholars and writers are affirming same-sex relations by studying the Bible. not from experience.

Today, the debate is not about what the Bible says but about what it means. So when you discuss this topic, gone are the days where you could throw texts at people and settle the topic.

People are hurting

We have friends, sons, daughters, family members, co-workers and church family that are hurting because of what we’re looking at today. The stats are clear. LGBT young people are twice as likely to commit suicide than someone who is straight according to CDC

• Fifty-five percent of LGBT youth feel unsafe at school because of their sexual orientation, and 37 percent feel unsafe because of their gender expression.

• Seventy-four percent of LGBT youth were verbally harassed because of their sexual orientation, and 55 percent were verbally harassed because of their gender expression.

• Sixteen percent were physically assaulted, either punched, kicked, or injured with a weapon, because of their sexual orientation, and 11 percent of them experienced this type of assault because of their gender expression.

This doesn’t have to be the case for everyone but this topic presents difficulty because we want to be sensitive.

People that identify as LGBTQ have family and loved ones that are hurting them. The beliefs of their family are at odds in ways that severely injure and harm their gay loved ones (stats)

There’s an Adventist study out that confirms this. 81 percent of LGBT adventists confirmed that their parents struggled to accept their sexual orientation or gender identity. 65 percent of them said that they responded as if their sexual orientation was a poor reflection on them. 71 percent admitted that they were called names such as fag or sissy by their family. 55 percent witheld financial support unless they complied with their wishes about sexuality.

Now personally, I have a couple good friends that identify with the LGBT community. As a former music teacher for the Adventist school system, I faced numerous children confess how much inner turmoil and dissatisfaction with life beachse of their orienttation. And as a K-12 music teacher, I saw children who demonstrated a proclivity or inclination towards probably coming out when they’re a teenager.

And I stand before you as somebody who comes from a place of deep sexual brokenness who yes, did experiment and explore.

So I’m personally invested in addressing this topic, despite its difficulties, because it’s absolutely mandatory that we strive to be people that present the gospel in a way that includes good news even for our LGBTQ friends and family. I admit I don’t have all the answers and the church doesn’t have all the answers. But through all of this meaningful dialogue and discourse, Jesus still needs to be the answer.

With that in mind, let’s look at what the word says and then discuss how to live out the principles it teaches.

What does the Bible say?

So like pastor edmonds did last week to establish how to address marriage and divorce, we’re going to do the same thing to establish how to address why our church does not affirm LGBTQ behavior and practice. We have to start at the beginning. At the end of , we find the high point of God’s creative power:

Then God said,

“Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness;

let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over the cattle, over all the earth and over every creeping thing that creeps on the earth.” 27So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him;

male and female He created them.

Notice the author goes out of his way to point the differentiation or the duality within humankind.

goes on to further explain God’s original plan

And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. 22 Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.

23 And Adam said:

“This is now bone of my bones

And flesh of my flesh;

She shall be called Woman,

Because she was taken out of Man.”

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Now my parents are Jamaican. Back in the day, the island of Jamaica was part of the British empire. If you were in Jamaica, you were in Britain. As a matter of fact you didn't need a passport to travel because Jamaica was an extension of the empire.

God made Adam & Eve to live in a place that was considered to be an extension of heaven - planet earth. They were living on earth but governed by heaven’s rules. According to Genesis, God’s plan for human sexuality on earth finds expression in a heterosexual marital form. The reference to man and his wife leaves little room to interpretation as to how God would want our marriage relationships to be formed and modeled for all time. God intended for their marriage to reflect the image of God, raise godly children, establish and build his kingdom on earth, fulfill companionship and make a new family unit. A committed same-sex relationship could attempt to fulfill these intentions but would fall short and not fit this model. Not because God is harsh or inflexible. But simply because it would not be God’s ideal.

But this is what happened. Planet earth, an extension of heaven's ideal, fell into enemy territory through the mistakes of Adam & Eve. And now because Adam & Eve fell, humanity is fallen. Because Adam and Eve messed up, we’re all messed up. We all can be born with some level of brokenness, some level of dissonance, some level of damage because we all have been born in sin and have been shaped in iniquity. And sometimes we act on what we’re born with. So what are you saying, pastor Kim, that if I'm gay, I’m broken? Hang with me, we’ll get there. Let's think globally because what I’m establishing is a foundation for the gospel to be applicable for all humanity because from the beginning, we all messed up.

Now there are scriptures in the bible that highlight or demonstrates our fallen humanity and God’s redemptive response to it. Let’s look at a couple in the context of our topic today.

Sodom & Gomorrah

Sodom has been associated with homosexuality since the beginning of Christian history. For years, the term sodomite referred to men who had sex with other men. Many Christians believe God destroyed Sodom because its residents were gay.

But they weren’t. There’s nothing in that talks about gay people. The narrator first describes the condition of Sodom’s men as “wicked, great sinners against the Lord” . Are we to assume that if you’re gay, you’re automatically wicked and sinful? No. What was the sin? Well back then sex, outside of God’s ideal, had more to do with control and power than orientation. The main sin committed in was men trying to assert power, domination over Lot’s visitors. While it’s true that they attempted to have sex with other men in , this was an act of domination, not attraction, like when one male prisoner may rape another male prisoner as a display of power, not necessarily LGBTQ orientation. And I don’t know any gay person who would use this text and say I can be gay because these men attempted to gang rape angels in disguise. Regardless of how we may interpret the text, this story definitively highlights how wicked and messed up humanity had become and the lengths God went to redeem his people from it. The bible says that Lot and his family escaped. But it would be a stretch to say that the story of Sodom & Gomorrah somehow legitimizes our fallen humanity. Rather, If anything, it shows that we need to be saved from it.

Now Paul’s statements in Romans and is a bit better but let’s see where we land.

When Paul was speaking to the Roman culture, again we have to extract our westernized view of human sexuality to see what he was really saying. Within the greco-roman culture, it wasn’t so much homosexual behavior vs heterosexual behavior, the sexual culture was honor versus shame. It was passive versus aggressive. Because they had such a low view of women in that culture, men laying with men was generally acceptable not because they identified as homosexual but because they identified as men. but women laying women was considered unacceptable, not because they identified as lesbian but because of their sexually passive function.

In walks Paul who comes with a completely different perspective.

For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal power and Godhead, so that they are without excuse, 21 because, although they knew God, they did not glorify Him as God, nor were thankful, but became futile in their thoughts, and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22 Professing to be wise, they became fools, 23 and changed the glory of the incorruptible God into an image made like corruptible man—and birds and four-footed animals and creeping things.

24 Therefore God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves, 25 who exchanged the truth of God for the lie, and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen.

Paul adapts the Judaic approach to sexuality which is outrightly clashing with the greco-roman culture! He defines what’s natural according to the Creation story. Paul is saying I see that you use sex to serve you psychologically. I see that you use sex to serve you culturally. I see that you use sex to serve you (massagenistically) misogynistically. But here’s another perspective. in God’s ideal plan for sexuality outlined at Creation, sex serves to bring glory to the Creator!

Furthermore, Paul clearly articulates that these sexual vices are not found in isolation. Rather there are combined with quite a few things that don’t bring glory to the Creator. Let’s read;

And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a debased mind, to do those things which are not fitting; 29 being filled with all unrighteousness, sexual immorality,[c] wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, evil-mindedness; they are whisperers, 30 backbiters, haters of God, violent, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents, 31 undiscerning, untrustworthy, unloving, unforgiving,[d] unmerciful; 32 who, knowing the righteous judgment of God, that those who practice such things are deserving of death, not only do the same but also approve of those who practice them.

Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals,[a] nor sodomites, 10 nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. 1 corinthians 6

So I’m not sure why we take this text and bludgeon our LGBTQ friends with threats of hell and death when they are quite a few things listed that EVERYBODY struggles with.

so again, regardless of how we may interpret the text, Paul was writing letters to the church in rome and corinth to definitively oppose the brokenness and fallenness found in all of humanity.

not legitmize or normalize it. or even allow pure motives to justify it

But I'm so glad God isn’t afraid of our dysfunction. God has never been afraid of our mess. God isn't afraid of our orientation, proclivities and inclinations. Even though we find ways to legalize our mess, justify it, God still sent his only son into our mess. God still sent his only son into the midst of our dysfunction so that we can confidently agree with paul and say

11 And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.

God so deeply loves us, God so perfectly loves the fornicator, idolater, adulterer, homosexual, sodomite, theif, covetous, drunkard, revilers and extortioners,God loves every person that he gave his only son not to condemn them but that the world through Him might be saved.

this is why we hold fast to the convictions we believe. we haven’t always acted like what we believe which we’re going to talk about next but this church stands firm on the fact the gospel can be bigger in our lives than our sins and struggles if we let it. That the gospel can heal and set free when the gospel becomes bigger than what’s keeping us in bondage. We are not ashamed of the gospel because we really believe it is the POWER of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes.

(which leads me to make this statement:

If you are here and you are LGBT or questioning your sexuality, I can’t tell you what you should do. That’s your decision. You are the one who is going to have to make that decision, because you are the one who has to live with your decision. Grace Community teaches, per the official doctrine of the Seventh Day Adventist church, that God’s design is that marriage is between a man and a woman, sex outside of heterosexual marriage is wrong, and that God gave you your gender through biological identity at birth. We believe that it’s the sexual ethics taught in the Bible. Not everyone here believes that, but most do. We are here to support you in pursuing that goal, and we believe it is the best, most satisfying, and most holistic way to live. If you believe differently or choose to pursue a different goal, we still want you here but understand if this might not be the church for you.)

How does Grace Community church live out God’s love? (give commentary on each point) I don’t have all the answers. This church doesn’t have all the answers.

For my LGBTQ friends (and anyone who wants to listen)

Live out God’s love by being honest. Love doesn’t lie. Love tells the truth. God can handle your truth. God can handle your honesty. God can handle the tension you feel of acknowledging your reality and acknowledging the truth of God’s word. God can handle the fact that you know you should repent but you really don’t feel like repenting. God can handle the fact that your sin doesn’t feel like a sin because it feels so good! God can handle the fact that you don’t feel at home in your body! God desperately wants you to be real with him. He longs to speak and minster to your authentic self. Let all that’s good, bad and ugly in you be used as a catalyst to draw you closer to Jesus Christ and not away from him. The best way to feel the presence of God, to experience his comfort and peace, to really know the promises of God are true is to be daring enough to be honest. Let me say it like this. Remember the woman with the issue of blood? Yes, she was struggling but her issue didn’t keep her from the presence of God. Her issue caused her to desperately press into the presence of God. and when she got in the presence of God and touched him, she was made whole. Many of us want to be in the vicinity of his presence but we don’t want to touch him. We want to hang around Jesus but don’t want to touch him cause we’re comfortable with our issue. Don’t miss out on God’s healing and acceptance because you’re not being honest about what you need God to change. Only you know what needs to be changed and whatever it is, take advantage of the fact that Jesus has made himself available to be touched by the real you.

Live out God’s love by developing your own submissive relationship to God. Now let’s be clear, to experience victorious living, following God demands only one person in the driver’s seat. And it’s not you. Having a relationship with God requires submission. It requires submitting to the authority of God’s word and giving God’s word permission to interrogate and permeate every area of your life. It requires asking God not to baptize our feelings but instead create new feelings through the power of a submitted relationship with Him. Often that can be hard, painful and lonely. This often means that you don’t stop struggling right away and that change takes time. But it does mean that God promises to be gracious with you through the process of total submission. Now your relationship with God may not look like mine. The journey he has you on may not be my journey. But everybody that chooses to follow God, chooses to submit. If anybody knows this to be true, it’s Jesus! Father, seriously let this cup pass away from me but if not, let thy will be done. God’s will for my life may not be God’s will for your life but God’s will for everyone's life is that we all be saved. That requires entering into a covenant relationship with God that is totally submitted to him. Live out God’s love by finding a space where you can be honest with yourself and others. The love of God seeks to protect but you’re not protecting yourself when you keep your sexual turmoil bottled up inside. It’s actually quite harmful. We know this because way too much suicide and depression is happening within the LGBTQ community. So for the sake of your mental and emotional health, come out of somebody’s closet. Use your wisdom and discretion because everybody is not yet able. But find a counselor, a trusted friend, pastor, family member someone you can keep it real with. Live out God’s love by finding a community where you can grow in holiness and righteousness. Christianity was never meant to be a solo trip. You can’t do this by yourself. Don’t isolate yourself. The church needs you. You are not damaged goods. Remember the disciples in the book of Acts? They did everything together! That’s exactly what you need. Seek out Christians who value growing in Christ together. People that really believe in the power of Jesus. Find some church friends that you can run to day or night. That will help you with temptations and not define you by your temptations. Find some friends who understand the pain, struggle and intense loneliness that comes from choosing to grow in righteousness. Flowers grow together not only when it’s sunny but flowers grow together when it’s raining too. You don’t need fair weather Christians. You need Christians that are willing to grow with you when it’s hard as well. Live out God’s love by being quick to forgive. When Jesus said forgive 70 x7, this applies to you. Listen, people are going to say things that hurt, that are insensitive and mean. Some of it will be intentional and sometimes out of ignorance. Some things people will apologize for, others won’t. It is my prayer that every LGBTQ person finds it within themselves to declare Father forgive them for they know not what they do.

Live out God’s love by allowing people to disagree with you. Friends, there’s this notion out here that if people don’t agree with you, they can’t love or accept you. My friend and I have fairly open conversations about her decisions. So I asked her flat out if she got married to her partner, would she expect me to be there. And she was like no. And I really appreciate the fact that there can be healthy space for disagreements without severing the relationship. Not everyone that disagrees with you, hates you. If they choose not to wave a rainbow flag with you, it’s okay. Now when it comes to institutions and communities of faith, not all faith communities hate you because they disagree with your sexual ethics. It is unfair to say that the church doesn’t love me because I’m welcome but not affirmed in my LGBTQ practice.

Now for my straight friends

Live out God’s love by remembering that you’re not better because people sin differently than you. - Erykyah Badu For all have sinned and come short of the glory of God is not a fantasy. It’s an ever present reality. Refrain from judging them lest we ourselves be judged. Resist jumping on the hypocrite bandwagon that categorizes sins according to what’s popular and culturally acceptable. Your gluttonous, lustful self is not better than a murderer simply because your issues are more acceptable. Your 5th marriage is not any better than a same sex relationship. Live out God’s love by choosing compassion over condemnation. I am profoundly disappointed and upset when it comes to how we treat our LGBTQ community. We should strive to be a community where anyone can live under the umbrella of true love and grace. But I hear too many stories of LGBTQ people living under the umbrella of mistreatment and hatred within a Christian community. It’s vomit inducing to see so called Christians saddle a high horse and posture themselves as morally superior. We don’t just get to be FB bullies and shout that SS behaviors is a sin in all caps and then feel like we’ve fulfilled our membership checklist. We should be known as people who value humility, gentleness and patience because Jesus values this with us! How far is your compassion willing to stretch to see someone saved? How long are you willing to stay on your knees crying out to Jesus until your heart breaks for those whose hearts are broken as well. Compassion says I would rather place myself in a difficult space of compassionately and authentically loving gay people so they can experience the gospel versus robbing them of a chance to know Jesus for themselves because of my rigid, unloving approach. Sis in law. We can’t make anyone feel that their struggles or questions is somehow polluting the atmosphere. I’m not going to tell you exactly how to do this but the principle is that when in doubt, lean more into love than judgement. Lean more into opportunities for inclusion over exclusion. Good Samaritan Live out God’s love by Communicate effectively and with sensitivity. says “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear” Eliminate harmful language from your vocabulary. Eliminate catch phrases and cliche’s that are shallow and off putting We have got to stop making fun of people who identify with the LGBTQ community. At the dinner table, on our job. with your friends. If you go to grace community, it’s no longer funny to laugh at jokes and situations that demean or make fun of LGBTQ people. ppl should feel extremely uncomfortable around you with that behavior. One way we can begin is by eliminating harmful language from your vocabulary. First let’s learn what’s acceptable: LGBT/LGBTQ: An acronym that refers to Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Questioning/Queer. Sometimes letters are added for Intersex, Asexual, Ally, and others as well. The intention is to be inclusive. It’s sometimes referred to as alphabet soup. Though it is cumbersome, it includes groups that don’t fit into definitions such as gay Biological Sex: A person’s genetics and genitalia determine their biological sex. In most cases people’s biological sex is clearly male or female, but not always. For some people, their biological sex is different from their gender identity. Gender Identity: To be differentiated from biological sex. While sex is related to biology, gender is a social construct. That is not to say that gender is chosen, but that a person’s sense of gender may not match their biological sex. A person’s gender identity may be male though biologically and genetically his sex is female. Gay: Someone who is attracted to their same gender, it formerly referred to men only both now often refers to women as well. It also has come to have a more broad meaning in some contexts. It can be used as an umbrella term for LGBT people. Queer: This is often used of an umbrella term to describe LGBT people who often identify as queer or as an adjective in situations where LGBT might be cumbersome such as queer film, queer politics, or queer media. It was a pejorative term that is being reclaimed by LGBT people, but it is still sometimes used negatively. If you are straight and cisgender, you may want to use caution with this term as some LGBT people could be offended since it has only recently been reclaimed, and the process is not yet complete. It is still used pejoratively at times. Sexual Identity: This refers to the term a person uses to self-identify their orientation. It is how they choose to present themselves to the world, and people have different reasons for choosing identities other than only their orientation. A person whose orientation is bisexual may choose to identify as gay or lesbian if they identify more closely with that community, are interested primarily in dating the same gender, are concerned about biphobia in the queer community, or are in a relationship with someone of the same gender. Often people who are attracted to other genders choose to identify as straight to avoid harassment or because they believe same-sex sexuality is wrong.

Sexual Orientation: This refers to a person’s unchosen and natural sense of sexual attraction. Though a person’s sexual identity may change over time, research indicates that a person’s general sense of attraction is persistent and resistant to change. Sexual orientation should not be conceived of as binary, either straight or gay. Many people fall somewhere in between. Sometimes this means people who are primarily straight but experience occasional but persistent same-sex attraction. People can also be primarily gay and experience occasional but persistent other-sex attraction. Other people are bisexual and experience persistent attraction to their own and other genders though this attraction may ebb and flow over a lifetime and they may be more or less interested in different genders at different stages in life and different situations, their attraction over time is nonetheless bisexual. It may also happen that someone becomes aware of other attractions later in life, but it is very uncommon perhaps even impossible for a person to have persistent attraction for a gender that goes away.

Unacceptable: fag, sissy, sweet, queen, flaming

Homosexual: This terms comes from a time in which LGBT people were almost exclusively referred to in negative terms, and it is not a term which LGBT people often choose the describe themselves.

Homosexual/Gay Lifestyle: LGBT people have all kinds of different lifestyles. This terms is generally used to stereotype. Talk about LGBT lives instead of lifestyles.

Sexual Preference: People don’t choose their sexuality. Use the terms sexual orientation or sexual identity.

Tranny/Tranvestite: These are dated and pejorative terms. Speak about transgender or trans people.

Live out God’s love by not using people. There’s this mentality especially within the black community that says your gifts can come out the closet but your gayness needs to stay in the closet. Sing us into a frenzy, write songs that make us weep before the altar, play us into the very stratosphere of glory but only do this so long as you keep your sexuality a secret because I need you to set the atmosphere. And I’m saying we need to stop pimping out our brothers and sisters for our selfish gain. Remember the president is not your pastor and the country is not your church. There’s a big difference between sharing the gospel and imposing the gospel on someone as a moral standard who is not converted. Christians are not imposters. America is not here to legislate your christianity. America is here to provide freedom for anyone to live out what they believe to be true. Stop getting to know issues. Start getting to know people. I think Christians can do better at being better thinkers. It’s like our worldview only works in underground bunkers, sheltered from the real world. One way to move away from this is get to know people instead of issues. Make friends, talk to family members, read a book, watch a documentary. Do all you can to educate yourself not on an issue but on people. There should be no fear in learning from people who think differently than you do, feel differently, live differently. Welcome any chance to dialogue despite the difference. and when you have conversations don’t use the bible to stop the conversation, use the bible to continue the conversation. This is why small groups are so important. Speak only out of compassionate relationship. Not isolating conviction. says “Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear” The line “need of the moment” is crucial. Too often, we feel as though we must speak our full heart on all matters. We feel dishonest if we don’t tell the whole story. Honestly, forget about telling someone what’s right or wrong if you haven’t established a trusting relationship with that person. No biblical interpretation is legit if it’s in conflict with love for God and/or love for your neighbor. When we look at what the bible says, what ultimately should motivate our understanding of scripture should not be our desire to defend our own credibility and rightness but we should strongly aim to live out the core principles of love, mercy and grace. The woman caught in adultery can testify to this. She would tell you that her accusers were right to bring her out to be stoned but Jesus was more concerned about being just than being right. Justice and relationship work together. Because once Jesus was just with her, he was able to point her to what’s right.

Why is all of this important ,

We’re living in a world that keeps putting limits on God’s love and grace. That it only works for some people. for some sins.

People need to know that in every area sin abounds God’s grace abounds that much more! Like do we really believe in the power of Jesus or not? Do we really believe God’s grace can permeate every inch of our lives and completely transform us?

whatever you’re struggling with, take the limits off God’s grace! but y'all don’t understand run my struggle…take the limits off

y'all don’t understand what I’m feeling…take the limits off God’s grace

y'all don’t understand what it’s like to want love and feel like I’ll never be able to receive love…take the limits off God’s grace

my grace is sufficient

the world needs to see what that looks like…

Whether gay or straight, we have a unique opportunity to rise above the shallow christianity that keeps putting limits on God’s grace and show the world that there’s a church that has taken the limits off!