Reliable Father

Reliable: Father

Reliable: Father / Growing up with no reliability.  

We can choose our friends, but we do not choose our parents.

Some of us hit the lottery when it came to our Dad’s. Especially those of you that were raised in a God honoring and God fearing home. Some of us hit bankruptcy in the Dad category. And some of you fall somewhere in between the two.

Trusting and seeing God as Father can cause anxiety for some people and is a stumbling block for some do to the fact that they did not have the ideal earthly father figure or example. So, they superimpose that on God. We look through the broken lens unhealthy fathers have left on us.

 I know I did. And learning the scriptures has changed my understanding and love of God as Father. 

What do you think about God and God as Father?

John 14:6–7 NIV (Slide Only)

6Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me. 7 If you really know me, you will know my Father as well. From now on, you do know him and have seen him.”

To know Him is to know God. This constant emphasis on Jesus as God incarnate is unmistakably clear in this Gospel.

The 6 types of fathers:Louie Giglio’s book - Not Forsaken.

1. An antagonistic Father Tears Down. Our Heavenly Father empowers.

An antagonistic father constantly communicates: You’re not enough.  You’ll never succeed. Why even try? His words discourage rather than develop.

But God speaks differently. God sees potential where we see weakness. God calls people into things they don’t feel capable of.

Moses stuttered. Gideon was afraid. Peter failed. Yet God called them anyway. God is not working against His children. He is working for their growth and His glory.

Some of us are still carrying voices from our past that tell us we’ll never be enough. Maybe from our earthly fathers.

But God reminds us:

Jeremiah 29:11 NIV (Slide Only)

11For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you,plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11 NIV (Slide Only)

11For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

2. An abusive Father creates fear. Our Heavenly Father is safe.

I had two step dads that fit this first description. One was physically abusive and the other verbally.

An abusive father uses his strength to control, intimidate, or harm. Children learn to walk on eggshells.

They never know what version of dad they’re going to get.

But God’s strength is different. God never uses His power to harm His children.

Psalm 91:1-2 NIV (Slide Only)

“The one who lives under the protection of the Most High dwells in the shadow of the Almighty.”

His power protects. His power shelters. His power provides refuge. The safest place in the world is in the presence of God.

Some people hear “Father” and feel anxiety. God wants to redefine what a father can be. He is not someone to run from. He is someone to run to.

3.A passivefather watches from the sidelines. Our Heavenly Father is intentional.

A passive father avoids hard conversations. He avoids correction. He lets life shape his children instead of helping shape them himself.

But God loves us too much to leave us where we are. God teaches. God corrects. God disciplines. Not because He is angry. Because He is invested.

Discipline is not rejection. Discipline is evidence of relationship.

Sometimes the discipline of God feels uncomfortable. But a loving Father doesn’t ignore His children. He intentionally develops them.

Hebrews 12:5–11 NIV (Slide Only)

5And have you completely forgotten this word of encouragement that addresses you as a father addresses his son? It says, “My son, do not make light of the Lord’s discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, 6because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son.” 7 Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as his children. For what children are not disciplined by their father? 8 If you are not disciplined—and everyone undergoes discipline—then you are not legitimate, not true sons and daughters at all. 9 Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of spirits and live! 10 They disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, in order that we may share in his holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

Vs. 9. You will thank me for this later. Ah no I won’t. Then later when we become parents we are then doing the same thing with our children.

Do you see your heavenly father like a father that is disciplining you for your good?

4. A performance-based father says, “Earn my love.” Our Heavenly Father is grace-filled.

Performance-based love sounds like:

Make me proud. Which really means make me look good by: Getting good grades. Win the game. Behave perfectly. The message becomes: “I love you because of what you do.”

You can’t earn it, He gives it.

Ephesians 2:8–9 NIV (Slide Only)

8For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—9 not by works, so that no one can boast.

Romans 5:8 NIV (Slide Only)

8But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

God loved us before we cleaned ourselves up. Before we got it together. God loves you the way a good father should (unconditionally). You don’t have to do anything more for Him to love you more. He has chosen to love you again unconditionally.

Many Christians spend their lives trying to earn what God has already given. You don’t obey to gain His love. You obey because you already have it.

5. An absentfather leaves empty spaces. Our Heavenly Father is present.

Deuteronomy 31:8 NIV (Slide Only)

8The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.”

I struggled with this verse early in my faith. Because Dad left.

An absent father leaves questions: Why did you leave? Why didn’t you show up? Do I matter?

Matthew 28:20 NIV (Slide Only)

20and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

But God has never abandoned His children. In every season: Celebration, Grief, Success, Failure, Waiting.

God remains present. You may feel alone. But feelings don’t determine reality. Your Father is closer than you realize.

The Heavenly Father was the one we’ve always needed.

According to the U.S. Census Bureau (2022), 18.4 million children under 18 years old, 1 in 4, live without a biological, step, or adoptive father in the home.That’s enough children to fill Los Angeles four times over.

There is another kind of fatherlessness. A spiritual fatherlessness.

Psalm 68:4–6 NIV (Slide Only)

4Sing to God, sing in praise of his name, extol him who rides on the clouds; rejoice before him—his name is the Lord. 5 A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. 6 God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.

Lonely: Deserted.

Jeremiah 31:3 NIV (Slide Only)

3The Lord appeared to us in the past, saying: “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.

His love doesn’t run out. His love doesn’t leave. His love doesn’t have conditions. Long before you ever reached for Him, He was reaching for you.

Video: Dad was there the whole time. – Salvation Op.