Gospel-Shaped Forgiveness
Notes
Transcript
Planning
Planning
Passage
Passage
1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our dear friend and fellow worker—2 also to Apphia our sister and Archippus our fellow soldier—and to the church that meets in your home: 3 Grace and peace to you from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. 4 I always thank my God as I remember you in my prayers, 5 because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus. 6 I pray that your partnership with us in the faith may be effective in deepening your understanding of every good thing we share for the sake of Christ. 7 Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people. 8 Therefore, although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do, 9 yet I prefer to appeal to you on the basis of love. It is as none other than Paul—an old man and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus—10 that I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, who became my son while I was in chains. 11 Formerly he was useless to you, but now he has become useful both to you and to me. 12 I am sending him—who is my very heart—back to you. 13 I would have liked to keep him with me so that he could take your place in helping me while I am in chains for the gospel. 14 But I did not want to do anything without your consent, so that any favor you do would not seem forced but would be voluntary. 15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord. 17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. 18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. 19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back—not to mention that you owe me your very self. 20 I do wish, brother, that I may have some benefit from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in Christ. 21 Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I ask. 22 And one thing more: Prepare a guest room for me, because I hope to be restored to you in answer to your prayers. 23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, sends you greetings. 24 And so do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas and Luke, my fellow workers. 25 The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit.
Passage structure
Passage structure
Introduction (Philemon 1-3)
Thanksgiving and prayer (vv. 4-7)
Paul’s Plea for Onesimus (vv. 8-21)
Farewell (vv. 22-25)
Big stuff
Big stuff
Big idea: The gospel empowers us to forgive our brothers and sisters.
Fallen condition focus: We find it hard to forgive our brothers and sisters in Christ.
Good news statement: The gospel empowers us to forgive our brothers and sisters.
Felt need: We don’t know how to our brothers and sisters who have hurt us.
Big question: How do we relate to those who have hurt us?
Sermon structure
Sermon structure
Intro
Grudge against Carole/Louisa
How do we relate to those who have hurt us?
Sermon structure
Listening in to a phone call
0, Setting the scene
The four points
1, Philemon as a mature Christian
Philemon 1–2 “1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our dear friend and fellow worker—2 also to Apphia our sister and Archippus our fellow soldier—and to the church that meets in your home:”
Philemon 5–7 “5 because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus. 6 I pray that your partnership with us in the faith may be effective in deepening your understanding of every good thing we share for the sake of Christ. 7 Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people.”
2, Philemon’s past relationship with Onesimus
Philemon 15–16 “15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord.”
Short excursus on slavery
Colossae and Rome
Colossians 4:9 “9 He is coming with Onesimus, our faithful and dear brother, who is one of you. They will tell you everything that is happening here.”
Map - 1,500 km - here to Brisbane
Likely stole money for the long trip
3, Onesimus met Paul in prison and became a Christian
Became a Christian - Philemon 10 “10 that I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, who became my son while I was in chains.”
4, Paul is now sending Onesimus back to Philemon
Philemon 15–18 “15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord. 17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. 18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me.”
A remarkable command to forgive
[blank slide]
Imagine being Philemon
Onesimus has approached you to become your slave
He then left you and stolen money
It’s in this pain that Paul’s instructions are remarkable
Philemon 17–18 “17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. 18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me.”
Doesn’t Paul know the hurt that Philemon has experienced from Onesimus? Is he being insensitive?
No, Paul knows the hurt… and he knows something greater. He knows the gospel and he knows that Philemon knows the gospel. And this gospel can release Philemon from that hurt and allow Philemon to forgive.
And the gospel can release us from our hurt and allow us to forgive.
How does the gospel allow Philemon/us to forgive?
1, The gospel compels us to love.
Paul knows that Philemon understands love.
Philemon 4–5 “4 I always thank my God as I remember you in my prayers, 5 because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus.”
“your faith in the Lord Jesus”
Love is sacrificial. It’s doing what’s best for the other person, even if it’s costly.
Jesus’ love for us means we love others.
“your love for all his holy people”
That’s why he appeals to love.
Philemon 8–9 a “8 Therefore, although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do, 9 yet I prefer to appeal to you on the basis of love. ...
So if love is doing what’s best for the other person, even if it’s costly, what’s best for Onesimus? The best thing for him is to be welcomed back by Philemon. To be cared for as a brother. To be forgiven.
Love motivates forgiveness.
Application: Think about a Christian who has hurt you.
2, The gospel reveals our brotherhood/sisterhood in Christ.
How might Philemon naturally view Onesimus?
Easy to focus on seeing him as someone who hurt you
Negative effects of focussing on the hurt
There must be a better way
Brother in Christ
Philemon 15–16 “15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord.”
How? Justified by faith = declared righteous
[blank slide]
When someone becomes a Christian, their identity is changed from a sinner to a righteous person. It’s like God is saying, “You are righteous. You are righteous, not because of what you’ve done, but because of Christ.”
If that’s the case, then Philemon connects the dots and sees that Onesimus is righteous. Not because of what he’s done, but because of Christ.
Application: Think of a Christian who has hurt you.
3, The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
The gospel reminds us about how we have sinned against God and we have a massive debt we cannot repay.
But God has forgiven that massive debt. And that frees us to forgive those who have hurt us and are in some sense indebted to us.
Jesus in Matthew 18:21-35 on the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant
Now Paul is imitating Jesus
Paul previously shared the gospel with Philemon, so in some sense, Philemon owes Paul his very life. In some sense, that’s a massive debt.
And Paul appeals to that massive debt to help Philemon forgive Onesimus of that significant but smaller debt.
Philemon 18–19 “18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. 19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back—not to mention that you owe me your very self.”
[blank slide] Application: The Christian who has hurt you.
Invitation to speak to me, Tim, Michael, Trent, Dave, or a home group leader or a friend
The fruit of gospel-shaped forgiveness
Philemon 21 “21 Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I ask.”
[blank slide] Imagine being Philemon’s friend
You know Philemon is a mature Christian, but he’s hurt from Onesimus running away and stealing his money
You hear in the Colossian news that Onesimus has come back! You don’t know how Philemon will react.
And when you go to church on Sunday, you see Philemon and Onesimus embrace one another. You see them standing side by side during the church service as they and the whole church sing songs of praise to God. And you think to yourself, “Wow, isn’t God good? Not only does he reconcile us to him but he has helped these two brothers reconcile as well.”
That wonderful reconciliation isn’t just for Philemon’s church of course.
Last year’s hurtful comment to a couple
Good for me: receiving forgiveness, restored relationship, reminder of God’s forgiveness
Carole/Louisa
Feedback from Olivea
Feedback from Olivea
27/5
- "I'd like to confess" sounds too positive
- shorten setting the scene and summarise the scene at the start
- betrayal might be better worded as wronged
- angry father section was too long - child making a mess should clean it up
- maybe include v 25
- is Paul being insensitive vs isn't Paul
Sermon
Sermon
Intro
Intro
I used to hold a grudge against my friend.
For her privacy, I won’t use her real name.
I’ll call her Louisa.
Louisa and I were both at the same church.
We were good friends.
In the trust of that friendship, I shared with her some personal information.
Information that was to be kept confidential.
One day, Louisa and I were hanging out with some other church friends.
And she thought it would be funny to share my personal information with them.
I didn’t find it funny.
I felt betrayed.
I felt like I couldn’t trust her anymore.
Now, back then, I would’ve called myself a mature Christian.
I knew the gospel.
I knew God’s forgiveness to me in Christ.
But I didn’t know how to deal with this hurt, aside from just holding a grudge.
And as I look at Christians in Canberra, in Australia, and across the world, there are many Christians who have been hurt by their brothers and sisters.
Many people who don’t know how to deal with that hurt.
Perhaps that’s you too.
Perhaps you’ve been hurt by someone, maybe even someone else in this church.
How are we to relate to those who have hurt us?
Thankfully, God in his kindness has given us answers in Paul’s letter to Philemon.
This letter to Philemon shows us that the gospel hasn’t just transformed our relationship with God.
The gospel continues to transform our relationships with our brothers and sisters in Christ.
Specifically, the gospel empowers us to forgive our brothers and sisters in Christ.
The gospel empowers us to forgive.
We’re going to see in this letter the gospel empowering us to forgive in three ways:
1, The gospel compels us to love.
2, The gospel reveals our brother-/sisterhood in Christ.
3, The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
The gospel compels us to love.
The gospel reveals our brother-/sisterhood in Christ.
The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
But before we do that, we need to spend some time setting the scene.
[Don’t read]
0, Setting the scene
1, The gospel compels us to love.
2, The gospel reveals our brother-/sisterhood in Christ.
3, The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
That’s because this letter is a bit overhearing someone on the phone.
You can make out some details.
But it only makes sense if you know more of the context.
Thankfully, this letter is also God’s word to us.
And God has given us enough information within the letter to help us figure out what has happened.
This is what we’re going to do first.
0, Setting the scene
0, Setting the scene
We’re going to jump around the passage to set the scene.
To see the situation that Paul is speaking to.
We’re going to see four things.
1, Philemon is a mature Christian.
2, Philemon had Onesimus as a slave, but Onesimus ran away.
3, Onesimus met Paul and became a Christian.
4, Paul is now sending Onesimus back with this letter to Philemon.
Let’s see that a bit more in the passage.
Firstly, Philemon is a mature Christian.
That Christian maturity is partly seen in Paul describing him as a fellow worker.
And Philemon even hosts a church in his house.
Let’s read of that in verses 1 and 2.
Verse 1-2.
1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our dear friend and fellow worker—2 also to Apphia our sister and Archippus our fellow soldier—and to the church that meets in your home:
Philemon is also known for his great love for others.
That love is clear in verses 5 to 7.
Let’s read verses 5 to 7.
5 because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus. 6 I pray that your partnership with us in the faith may be effective in deepening your understanding of every good thing we share for the sake of Christ. 7 Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, brother, have refreshed the hearts of the Lord’s people.
The second thing to know as we set the scene is that Philemon previously had Onesimus as a slave but Onesimus ran away.
That’s implied in verses 15 and 16.
15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord.
That could sound a bit strange to us.
Philemon is a mature Christian and yet he had a slave?
Aren’t mature Christians against slavery?
Well we have to remember that slavery in the Greco-Roman world was different to modern-day slavery.
Much of the slavery in the Greco-Roman world was taken on by the initiative of someone in debt.
Someone in debt goes to a wealthy person and says,
“Let me work for you, let me be your slave, so that I can pay off my debt.”
Onesimus had made an agreement with Philemon to work for Philemon and pay of a debt.
However, Onesimus ran away.
We know that because we’ll soon see that Onesimus met Paul.
Paul is in prison in Rome.
Onesimus used to be a slave for Philemon, who lives in Colossae.
Let’s put that up on a map.
The straight-line distance between Colossae and Rome is roughly 1,500 km.
That’s a bit longer than from here to Brisbane.
It’s a very long journey, especially when they didn’t have cars and planes like we do.
So we’re not certain, but it’s likely that Onesimus stole some money from Philemon for this very long trip.
Philemon is a mature Christian.
Onesimus was a slave to Philemon but ran away.
And the third thing in setting the scene is that Onesimus met Paul in prison and became a Christian
Let’s read verse 10.
10 that I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, who became my son while I was in chains.
Paul often uses that language of becoming his son to describe someone who believe the gospel.
And now, the fourth and final thing in setting the scene
Paul is now sending Onesimus back to Philemon with this letter.
Paul wants Onesimus to welcome Philemon as a brother in Christ.
That’s in verses 15 to 18.
Let’s read verses 15 to 18.
15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord. 17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. 18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me.
Now, this could feel a bit distant for us since it happened almost 2,000 years ago.
But what Paul is telling Philemon to do is quite remarkable in light of what Onesimus has done.
To help us see how remarkable that is, I’d like you to imagine being Philemon.
One day, a man named Onesimus asks you for help.
He tells you he’s in debt.
He doesn’t have the money to pay it off.
So he begs you to take him on as a slave so that he can pay that debt.
Well, you’re a mature Christian.
You have compassion on Onesimus and you take him on as your slave.
Things are going well for a while.
You trust Onesimus more so you give him more responsibility, including giving him access to your money to buy food for the household.
Then one day, someone comes to you and tells you that Onesimus has run off with some of your money!
You look around for Onesimus, but you can’t find him anywhere.
You look for your money that Onesimus had access to, but it’s gone.
It’s true.
Onesimus has run off with your money.
It’s in this pain that Paul’s instructions are remarkable.
If Paul was a product of today’s culture, you might expect him to say,
“Philemon, Onesimus cancelled on you. It’s your turn to cancel him.”
Or perhaps:
“Philemon, you don’t need that kind of negative energy around you.”
But what does Paul say?
Let’s read verses 17 and 18.
Verses 17 and 18.
17 So if you consider me a partner, welcome him as you would welcome me. 18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me.
Wait… is Paul asking Philemon to welcome this person who has hurt him?
Doesn’t Paul know the pain Philemon has experienced because of Onesimus?
Is Paul being insensitive?
No, he’s not being insensitive.
Paul does know the hurt.
But he knows something greater.
Paul knows the gospel.
But it isn’t just that he knows gospel.
It isn’t just that Philemon knows the gospel as well.
Paul knows that this gospel can release Philemon from that hurt and allow him to forgive.
The gospel can release Philemon from that hurt and allow him to forgive.
That’s true for those of us who are carrying hurt as well.
There are people here who have been hurt by another Christian.
It has caused you great pain.
And perhaps this morning, God is showing you how to deal with that pain.
He is reminding you of the power of the gospel.
The gospel hasn’t just transformed our relationship with God but it continues to transform our relationships with others.
So, how does the gospel release us from our pain and allow us to forgive?
How does the gospel do that for Philemon?
We’re at point 1.
1, The gospel compels us to love.
1, The gospel compels us to love.
The gospel compels us to love.
Paul speaks to Philemon about love because Philemon is a mature Christian.
Philemon understands love.
Let’s read verses 4 and 5.
Verses 4 and 5.
4 I always thank my God as I remember you in my prayers, 5 because I hear about your love for all his holy people and your faith in the Lord Jesus.
Philemon knows what love is because he has a strong faith in Jesus.
He knows the clearest expression of love in Jesus laying down his life for us.
Love is doing what’s best for the other person, even when it’s costly.
Love is doing what’s best for the other person, even when it’s costly.
And because Philemon is so convicted in his faith in Jesus, Philemon pours out his love for others.
Philemon loves people so much that Paul has heard about it.
And that’s why Paul appeals to Philemon about love.
Let’s read verse 8 and the start of verse 9.
Verse 8 and the start of verse 9.
8 Therefore, although in Christ I could be bold and order you to do what you ought to do, 9 yet I prefer to appeal to you on the basis of love. ...
So if love is doing what’s best for the other person, even if it’s costly, what’s best for Onesimus?
The best thing for Onesimus is to be welcomed back by Philemon.
To be cared for as a brother.
To be forgiven.
For Philemon, the gospel has compelled him to love.
And that love enables him to forgive Onesimus.
Let’s try to apply that to our lives.
I’d like you to think about a Christian who has hurt you.
You remember the pain they caused you...
And as you remember that pain, you also remember the gospel.
In the gospel, you’re reminded of how you have greatly pained God.
You remember that despite your sin, Jesus loved you so much that he laid down his life for you.
You remember that he has set the ultimate example of love.
A love that is for the good of the other, even when it’s costly.
And that example compels you to love others as he has loved you.
Even the Christian who hurt you.
So as you think about the Christian who has hurt you, what does it look like to love them?
The answer for each of us will be different based on our circumstances.
Sometimes the most loving thing to do is to just let it go.
Or it could be lovingly speaking to someone about how they’ve hurt you.
Not to force them to apologise, but to help them see their wrong, to help them grow in godliness, and to reconcile the relationship.
It could include bringing a trusted friend or church leader to help with the reconciliation.
Parents who have been hurt by their kids can engage in loving discipline.
Hopefully, however we end up loving those who have hurt us, we move closer to forgiveness.
Because the gospel compels us to love.
The gospel shows us the ultimate example of love, of God forgiven us in Jesus, even though it cost Jesus his life.
And as we are compelled to love, that love motivates forgiveness.
But the gospel doesn’t just compel us to love.
It also reveals the true identity of Christians who have hurt us.
We’re at point 2.
2, The gospel reveals our brotherhood/sisterhood in Christ.
2, The gospel reveals our brotherhood/sisterhood in Christ.
The gospel reveals our brotherhood/sisterhood in Christ.
Let’s take a step back.
I’d like to ask you, how do you think Philemon would have felt about Onesimus after Onesimus ran away?
How do you think Philemon would have felt about
someone who he had taken on as a slave to help him with his debt
someone who had probably stolen a lot of money from him?
I imagine that Philemon was greatly hurt by this betrayal.
Perhaps he was angry that Philemon ran away.
Perhaps he was disappointed.
It would’ve been very easy for Philemon to remember Onesimus as that slave who wronged him.
That slave who ran away.
See, when we are hurt, our default is to focus on the pain.
That can be a good thing when it’s something like a cut on your arm.
When you have a cut on your arm, the pain alerts you to your bleeding and tells you to do something about.
But what about pain in our relationships?
It can cause us to see those who have hurt us only through the lens of pain.
That person… I’ve forgotten about all the good things he’s done.
He’s the one who hurt me.
And that pain can be carried for years.
And at its worst, that pain brings about revenge.
The pain spreads like a deathly virus.
There must be a better way to deal with the pain.
And that better way includes how we should perceive others.
How does Paul encourage Philemon to see Onesimus?
As a brother in Christ.
Let’s read verses 15 and 16.
15 Perhaps the reason he was separated from you for a little while was that you might have him back forever—16 no longer as a slave, but better than a slave, as a dear brother. He is very dear to me but even dearer to you, both as a fellow man and as a brother in the Lord.
Do you see what Paul is doing here?
Paul is helping Philemon see Onesimus’ true identity.
At the very heart of Onesimus’ identity is his Christian identity.
It’s who he is before God.
Now that Onesimus has trusted in Jesus, God doesn’t see Onesimus based on what Onesimus has done.
All of Onesimus’ evil deeds has been taken on by Jesus on the cross.
Onesimus’ betrayal of Philemon has been taken on by Jesus on the cross.
And so when God looks at Onesimus, he sees the righteousness of Jesus.
He sees Onesimus as his son.
He has brought Onesimus into his family.
Now that is a significant shift in perception for Philemon.
He needs to take off the lens of pain and put on the lens of Christian family.
He needs to stop focussing on seeing Onesimus as a runaway slave but as a brother in Christ.
And Paul knows Philemon can do it.
Because Philemon himself knows the gospel.
That gospel reveals someone’s true identity.
A fellow Christian is ultimately a brother or sister in Christ.
I’d like you to think of a Christian who has hurt you.
When you think about them, what is the first thing that comes to mind?
It’s probably how they’ve hurt you.
That’s the default for us and it’s understandable, especially if it’s very painful.
At the same time, we also know the gospel.
We know that the gospel shows us Jesus, who died on the cross to take the punishment for all sin.
All sin includes the sins of this Christian who hurt you.
All sin includes the present and future sins of this person.
We remember, even if it’s painful, we remember that God has forgiven them because of Jesus.
The gospel declares them as righteous.
And that means if you are a Christian, this Christian who hurt you is your brother or sister in Christ.
That is their true identity.
If you know who someone is, that helps you to respond to them appropriate.
Brothers and sisters still fight, but they work to forgive, to reconcile, because they’re family.
So the second way the gospel helps us forgive is that it reveals the true identity of fellow Christians who have hurt us.
They are still our brothers and sisters in Christ.
And so we love them, as brothers and sisters in Christ.
The gospel empowers us to forgive by compelling us to love and revealing our brotherhood/sisterhood in Christ.
Now the third way it empowers us to forgive is in its reminder.
We’re at point 3.
3, The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
3, The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
The gospel reminds us of our own debt.
When we remember the gospel, we might remember that we have sinned against God.
Each of us had a massive debt that we couldn’t repay ourselves.
But God has forgiven that massive debt by paying it through Jesus dying on the cross.
And that in turn frees us to forgive those who are in some way indebted to us.
Jesus makes a very similar point in Matthew 18 when he tells the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant.
You might remember that parable.
In that parable, a master forgave a servant a huge amount.
But the servant was unwilling to forgive a fellow servant a small amount and he was condemned for it.
Now, in this letter to Philemon, Paul is imitating Jesus.
Paul had previously shared the gospel with Philemon and it was through Paul that Philemon trusted in Jesus and was saved.
So in some sense, Philemon owes Paul his very life.
In some sense, Philemon owes Paul a massive debt.
So Paul reminds Philemon of that massive debt to help Philemon forgive Onesimus of the smaller debt.
Let’s read verses 18 and 19.
18 If he has done you any wrong or owes you anything, charge it to me. 19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand. I will pay it back—not to mention that you owe me your very self.
Do you see Paul’s logic?
He helps Philemon remember his own debt.
That debt has been forgiven.
Which then allows Philemon to forgive the smaller debt from Onesimus.
So we come back to the Christian who has hurt you.
As you think about them, you think first about the gospel.
And you remember that God has forgiven your massive debt.
How massive is that debt?
Well it includes every lie you’ve told.
Every form of pride and selfishness.
All your angry thoughts and words.
The times when you have been judgemental towards other.
When you have envied others.
When you have gossiped and slandered others.
When you have been ungrateful to God or forgotten him when you should’ve thanked him for all the gifts he has given you.
In light of all that, the gospel really is good news, isn’t it?
We each have a massive debt forgiven by God.
And when we appreciate just how much we are forgiven by God, we are so thankful!
And we are freed to forgive others.
So let me ask you, how big is the debt of the Christian who has hurt you?
And how big is the debt that God has forgiven you?
The gospel helps us forgive, because it reminds us of our own debt.
Now I realise that we’ve touch on a big topic, the topic of relational conflict.
There could be so much that could be said on this.
And I recognise that some people here have experienced very painful hurt from another Christian.
So I want to also say that God has given us each other to work through these hurts.
If you want to talk about something pain, Tim and I and the elders (Michael, Trent, and Dave)… we’re all willing to listen, to pray, and to talk through these things with you.
You could chat about it with your home group leader or another friend.
The fruit of gospel-shaped forgiveness
The fruit of gospel-shaped forgiveness
But I also trust that the letter to Philemon is a big piece to the puzzle.
It has shown us how we see fellow Christians because of the gospel.
They are our brothers and sisters.
This letter has shown us how the gospel empowers us to forgive.
It reminds us that our brothers and sisters are declared righteous.
It shows us what love is.
And it reminds us of our own debt.
That was enough for Philemon to forgive Onesimus.
It’s why Paul writes as he does in verse 21.
Let’s read verse 21.
21 Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I ask.
So let’s end by thinking about the joy of forgiveness, both in Philemon’s context, and then in our context.
Imagine for a moment that you’re Philemon’s friend.
You know Philemon is a mature Christian.
But he’s hurt from Onesimus running away and stealing his money.
You hear in the Colossian news that Onesimus has come back!
But you don’t know how he will react.
On Sunday, you go to church.
And you see Philemon and Onesimus embrace each other.
You see them standing side by side during the church service as they and the whole church sing songs of praise to God.
And you think to yourself,
“Wow, isn’t God good?
Not only does he reconcile us to himself… but he has helped these two brothers reconcile as well.”
That wonderful reconciliation isn’t just for Philemon’s church of course.
Last year, I said some hurtful and insensitive things to a couple at my church.
They were hurt.
I felt quite guilty.
We met up to discuss what had happened.
I apologised.
They forgave me.
That forgiveness was a wonderful blessing to me.
I was greatly relieved.
My relationship with them was restored.
It reminded me of God’s forgiveness too.
I trust that the forgiveness was good for them too.
They no longer have to hold onto that hurt.
And they can relate to me as their brother and pastor again.
And what about my friend, Louisa, who I shared about at the start?
Well one year after she made fun of me with the information I had given her, I talked about the situation with her.
She apologised.
I forgave her.
And it felt like a great burden was lifted.
It felt like I was no longer weighed down by my hurt.
And rather than feeling pain in that friendship, I could enjoy that friendship again.
Let’s pray.
Heavenly Father,
Thank you that you loved us so much that you sent Jesus. Thank you that even though we had a massive debt from our sin, you have forgiven that debt. Jesus has taken that debt on himself at the cross. Through him, we are declared righteous. And you have brought us into a family, where we can call each other brothers and sisters in Christ. Thank you.
We know that while we wait for Jesus to return, there will still be conflicts. And so we pray for people who are hurt by their brothers and sisters. Please help them to know the power of your gospel. May they see the person who has hurt them as you see them. May they be motivated by the love of Christ. May the remember how much you have forgiven them. So we pray that you would bless them with the joy of forgiveness and reconciliation.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen
[Introduce the Lord’s Supper]
