1 Corinthians 7:25-40

Godly Wisdom for Singles

Happy 250th Independence Day! Thank you to those who have served our country. 

We are continuing our study through 1 Corinthians where Paul is instructing the new believers about Christian living. 

In Chapter 7, Paul begins answering questions that the church sent him, starting with marriage, surrendering to God’s will where He has called you, as Brother Frank preached about last week, and now Paul is addressing the Corinthians question regarding betrothed. 

Paul offers Godly wisdom for being single, while also giving all of us a reminder that our time on earth is short, and shifts our focus to an eternal mindset. 

PAUSE 

A Barna study conducted in 2021 for married couples showed that 59% of people were satisfied in their marriage. That was not as high as I would have expected. 

Another study shows that 40% of single people report being happy. 

My conclusion after looking over these reports is that it’s hard to make everyone happy. 

Marriage or singleness alone will not bring us contentment; we can only find that in Jesus Christ.  

That is the heart of the message that Paul writes in this passage. 

Turn to 1 Cor 7:25-40 

Paul gives us Godly Wisdom for Singles: His first piece of wisdom is 

1.) Marriage Brings Trouble in This Life 

2.) The Present World is Passing Away 

3.) Singleness Allows for Full Devotion to God 

4.) Godly Singleness is Not Less Than 

25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.  

32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.  

36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38 So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.  

39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.  

PRAYER 

1.) Marriage Brings Trouble in This Life 

I asked Maren if she thought that marriage brought trouble in this life, and she answered yes instantly. 

I would like to start off by saying that I love my wife and we are happily married. This is not a cry for help; I am just following scripture. 

25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. 

Paul is typically known for his directness and boldness of commanding people the obey God’s word, comes across here in a more docile tone. 

The Corinthians earlier in chapter 7 had asked if it was better to withhold from intimacy in marriage or even leave an unbelieving spouse to be more holy and righteous; Paul clearly stated no to both of those questions. 

Now they are asking about what is best for the betrothed, some translations say virgins or engaged? What is best for those of the normal marital age who are not yet married? 

Paul says that there is no direct scriptural command, but he shares his wisdom with them.  

Paul was chosen by God to make disciples and plant churches, he had the wisdom of the Holy Spirit in him, so it is wise to heed his wisdom. 

26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 

Paul reiterates what he stated earlier in the chapter that it is good to stay as you are. 

But he offers us the freedom to choose between singleness or marriage. That would have been a bold statement at that time. Marriage was expected, especially for woman. 

A woman found her identity in that time by raiser her family and keep up her household. And her husband was her source of security and income. 

That’s why there was a command to take care of widows for the early church. 

But Paul says you can choose marriage or singleness, because of the current distress. 

The Greek work for distress translates to necessity.  

Paul is saying, based on the present necessity, you can choose. 

I believe distress here has two-fold meaning; one, the current state of the city of Corinth and all the calamities and persecution that was coming upon Christians at that time. Nero had just begun his reign when Paul wrote this letter, and he massacred Christians. 

Secondly, I think Paul has a much bigger picture in mind of the end times, which began when Jesus was crucified and then ascended to the Father. 

Considering that, Paul’s says it’s wise to remain how you are. 

27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. 

If you are married, stay married and let your marriage be an example of the gospel to a lost world. 

If you’re not married, then you can choose to stay single.  

But if you choose to marry, that’s fine too. 

Paul’s saying there is no right or wrong answer. You have the freedom to choose. 

Godly marriage is good and Godly singleness is good as well. Neither are sin. 

But Paul’s counsel to the singles is that they will be spared of trouble in this life by not being married. 

😊 If Paul was married, he wouldn’t be after saying that. 

We are not told if Paul was ever married, but we know he was single during his missionary journeys. 

Some scholars think that because Paul may have been a member of the Sanhedrin, an exclusive Jewish Counsel that was the central governing body for the Jews. 

One of the requirements to be in Sanhedrin was that you had to be married. There were exceptions to the rule, and the truth is we don’t really know if Paul was married or not. 

Whether Paul was ever married or not, he has wisdom to offer in regard to marriage and singleness. 

PAUSE 

When you take two sinful people and join them together, there will be troubles. 

Both people have their preferences on how they do things, and you have to learn to be unified and work together. 

I have throw pillows on my bed or couch. I have decorative towels in the bathroom. Those would not be my preference, but I love my wife, so we have them. 

I would spend all my money on guns and ammo, but I don’t because I’m married. 

If you aren’t married, you don’t have to worry about outlaws...excuse me...in-laws. I don’t think we need to expound on how that may cause troubles in life. 

You know the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted! 

I love my in-laws; they are a blessing to my life. 

PAUSE 

And then you add kids to the mix. Life is busy, it’s hard to parent well. 

Kids get sick and hurt. As they get older you worry about the decisions they make, it’s added troubles to your life. 

Adoniram Judson is a world-renowned missionary who spent his life sharing the Gospel and translating the Bible into the Burmese language. Many churches were planted because of his work and communities changed. 

His work was not easy. Judson’s perseverance — through imprisonment, illness, and cultural isolation — revealed a depth of conviction that make his contributions to Burma and to the Burmese church impossible to overstate. 

But his greatest perseverance was through the death of two wives and seven children. 

Judson wrote of the sorrow that was his near constant companion during his life. 

But he continued because of the hope he had in God. 

I think this is one of the many troubles Paul is referring to about marriage. 

Not that single people don’t experience loss, but when you become one flesh with a spouse and have to watch them suffer and die, it is excruciating.  

I got to watch firsthand the toll my own kidney transplant had on my wife. 

The burden that it was for her to take care of a sick husband, two young children and a household was overwhelming. 

Those are the kinds of troubles, I think Paul is referring to here.  

If you remain single, you are spared from some of those troubles. 

Paul single and was free to share the Gospel in many places, because he was free from caring for a family. 

2.) The Present World is Passing Away 

Prior to Jesus coming to earth and dying on the cross, it was a person’s lineage that define who they were. 

Marriage was important, and marrying a person from your nation was important. That’s why God commanded Israel not to intermarry with the surrounding nations. 

God’s covenant was to Abraham and the Israelites. 

But when Jesus came, He changed to game with a New Covenant in His blood. 

It was no longer our heritage that identified who we are, it is our relationship with Jesus. 

Jesus’s death and resurrection marked the end times for this world. 

Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words never will. 

Our lives and this earth in its current state are not eternal. They are passing away. 

But the promises and word of God will last forever, there will be a new heave and new earth. 

29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away. 

Paul says the end is near. 

Friends our lives are but a vapor. We don’t like to think that way, but it is important that we keep a proper eternal perspective. 

Earthly relationships, sickness, sadness, pleasures, jobs, careers, wealth and property are all temporary. And the time that we have them is short compared to eternity.  

Don’t get so caught up in what this world has to offer that you lose out on what matters in eternity, and that’s our relationship and obedience to King Jesus. 

PAUSE 

Paul is not saying if you have a spouse, to abandon your marriage, that goes against everything else he has said in 1 Cor. 

He’s simply saying keep your marriage in perspective with eternity. 

Love your spouse well, enjoy your marriage, glorify God in your marriage; but know that marriage is not eternal. Death ends the marriage covenant. 

Marriage should not be where our hope or identity is found.  

Neither should singleness. 

If you’re looking at marriage as a way of making you happy or finding contentment, you’ll be disappointed. 

PAUSE 

No person can fulfill a hole in your life that only King Jesus is meant to fill. 

PAUSE 

That’s not fair to the person you would marry to expect them to make you happy and content. That’s a burden they were never meant to carry. 

PAUSE 

And in heaven, we will not marry or be given in marriage.  

Jesus is our groom, and we the church as His bride, will spend eternity worshipping Him. 

PAUSE 

Likewise, Paul’s not saying we don’t mourn; there will be plenty of that in our lives. 

But don’t let your mourning identify who you are as a person. 

There may be pain in the night, but joy comes in the morning. 

Our earthly mourning is temporary. We have eternal hope! 

Likewise, rejoicing in this life will end as well.  

Paul's saying don’t get caught up in the emotion of this world. 

Our feelings and emotions can prevent us from fully surrendering and obeying God. Don’t allow that to happen. 

Focus on eternity. 

The same goes with our possessions and our careers. 

Don’t get so caught up in trying to be successful in business in your life, that you waste your whole life building up a great business portfolio, but have nothing in eternity. 

Remember the story of Lazarus and the rich man.  

The rich man spent his whole life accumulating the best the world has to offer and spent eternity is torment. 

The world, as we know, will come to an end. 

PAUSE 

The last year before my kidney transplant, I lived like each day could be my last. 

I woke up grateful to be alive. 

I served and lead youth ministry, which I said I would never do. 

I convinced Maren to serve in youth ministry, which I didn’t think I could do. 

I was going to go out with my boots on for Jesus. I wanted to leave everything I had on the dance floor, so to speak, if God called me home. 

Maren was nervous about what I would give away or volunteer to do next.  

I was living so I could hear well done good and faithful servant when God called me home. 

And I did that until my body physically would not allow me to any longer. 

I need to regain that perspective. I’ve gotten comfortable again living in this world. 

And when we are comfortable in this life, we often don't give God our all. 

3.) Singleness Allows For Full Devotion to God 

Paul kind of veered off singleness momentarily in those verses, but devotion to God whether you’re single or married is important. 

32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 

When you are not bound by the covenant of marriage, you have freedom. 

Not the freedom our society promotes for singles; to focus on your career more or hit every club in town to experience the best social life. 

It’s the freedom to fully devote yourself to God and do His will. 

A single person doesn’t have to worry about caring for another person. Their attention is not divided. 

If God calls you to be a missionary, you don’t have to consult your spouse, you just obey God. 

If a friend calls you in the middle of the night for help, you don’t have to think about if your wife is ok with you heading out or who might watch the kids, you just go. 

If you’re unmarried, you don’t have to make sure wives emotional, spiritual, and physical needs are being met.  

You just get to focus on your relationship with God and obeying Him.  

PAUSE 

When you’re married, you are not your own, you are one flesh with your spouse, so you work to meet their needs. 

That means you can’t spend every moment focusing on spiritual things; you have to provide food and shelter for your spouse. 

If I didn’t have to worry about caring for my wife and kids, I’d have more time to work on sermons and study the Word. 

That sounds like I’m blaming them for my preaching; I am not. Just stating the reality of divided focus that Paul is speaking to. 

Jim Elliot went to Ecuador to share the Gospel to the Huaorani people. An isolated and violent tribe. He left behind a young wife, Elizabeth, and 11-month-old daughter. 

The group of men left gifts and made many attempts to show signs of peace and friendship with the tribe, before making direct contact with them. 

Two days after they were on the ground with the tribe, Jim and four other missionaries were speared to death by the tribal warriors.  

Jim had to a be anxious about his family when he left on that trip, but he was devoted to obeying God. 

Two years later, Elizabeth and her daughter Valerie, who were now free to go where they wanted, chose to return to the jungles where her husband was killed. 

She was free from worry about a husband and pleasing him, and fully available to focus on God’s will. 

Her full devotion to God led her back to the same people that killed her husband, and her obedience led those people to Jesus. 

What an amazing testimony of these verses. 

Elizabeth devoted every area of her life to God.  

She fully devoted herself to Jim in marriage and supported him, anxious about her husband as Paul writes. 

And when Jim was killed, she fully devoted herself to God. 

I pray that we all devote ourselves to God in that same manner, whether married or single. 

 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord. 

Paul reminds us that he is not restraining singles from marrying, but pointing out one of the benefits of singleness is the ability to fully devote yourself to the Lord. 

4.) Godly Singleness is Not Less Than 

One of the things I felt most convicted about as I prepared for this message was the Christian view of being single. 

If we are truly honest, we are always trying to get everyone married off. 

We start singles Bible studies, in hopes that it will become a newly married Bible study. Not that that is wrong; it’s just how we are. 

Paul gives a different perspective. He says marriage is good, but singleness is better. 

Not something you hear often in church these days. 

36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin.  

If you desire to get married to give yourself wholly over to your spouse and walk together in obedience to God and making disciples; that’s a great thing, get married. 

Paul’s saying here, if you don’t have self-control over your desires, it’s better to get married than be sexually immoral. 

But he goes on to say that it may not be what is best. 

37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well.  

There are split views on what Paul means here. Some think he is talking about father’s who have dedicated their daughters to remain as virgins. 

The context surrounding this verse does not seem to agree with that. You are free to read this for yourself and decide. 

It seems to be talking about a man that is engaged to a woman of marital age. 

Paul says if you are not under compulsion to marry and you have self-control and your passion will not drive you into sexual immorality; then it is better to not marry. 

38 So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.  

In the world you will find that those who are single and those who are married will claim to have found the secret to fulfilling everything your heart desires. But that’s not true. 

Marriage is great and singleness is great. They are both equally great, whichever gift God has for your life, enjoy it. 

But neither are the answer to fulfillment of your heart's desires. Both will always let you down in some way, shape or fashion. 

But the good news is Jesus is the fulfillment of your greatest desire, and He will never let you down, in all of eternity. 

Whether you are single or married God loves you with a love that will never let you go! With a love that fully satisfies our desires, our soul. 

39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God. 

Paul closes his thought on marriage with the reminder that marriage is binding on earth, but if a spouse dies, you are free to remain single or remarry, but only to another believer. 

Though remaining single is better, as it does not resubmit a woman back into the troubles I spoke of earlier.  

Paul had the Spirit of God and shared this wisdom with the Corinthians, and with us. 

CONCLUSION 

I want to close this morning with a single application. 

Whether you are married or single, live your life fully devoted to King Jesus. 

Friends, if you are here this morning and looking for your satisfaction in marriage or in singleness; you’re not going to find it there. 

As a matter of fact, everything in this life will pass away, so if you set your hope on the things of this world, it's like trying to hold water in your hand, it’ll just keep slipping away. 

But God’s Word and His promises are eternal. And He will fully satisfy our desires. 

Paul says in Philippians that the secret to contentment in all circumstances is Christ in me. 

I invite you this morning to find your contentment in Christ, right where you are. Changing your circumstance will not change your contentment but surrendering to King Jesus will. 

But changing your perspective to the hope you have in King Jesus and the treasure He has laid up for us in heaven, will bring contentment to your soul, not matter what you are facing today. 

Prayer