Beloved 5: The Responsible Pursuit
Notes
Transcript
Bookmarks & Needs:
Bookmarks & Needs:
B: Song 2:8-17
N:
Welcome
Welcome
Bye, kids!
Again, welcome to Family Worship with the church body of Eastern Hills this morning! I’m Bill Connors, senior pastor of the church family here.
It’s been a great morning of praise and worship, and it’s a joy to be able to share in this experience together. If you’re visiting with us this morning, thanks for being here today. We’d really like to be able to connect with you to thank you for joining us for worship. If you could take a second during my message and fill out a communication card, which you’ll find in the back of the pew in front of you, we would really appreciate it. You can return that to us one of two ways: First, you can bring it down to me at the end of the service, because I’d like to meet you and give you a small gift as a token of our gratitude for your visit today. If you don’t have time for that this morning, you can drop the Welcome card in the boxes by the doors as you leave after the service ends. If you’d rather fill out something online, you can head to ehbc.org or download our church app (EHBC Albuquerque) and fill out the contact form at the bottom of the “I’m New” link.
I’d also like to say thanks to those who serve our church family as Bible Study Leaders. If you’re a Bible Study Leader, would you raise your hand for a moment? Thanks for your service. If you’re not in a Bible study—these people know of one you can go check out next week!
Announcements
Announcements
WHDR ($7,760) Goal $7,500 Goal surpassed!. Disaster Relief: The Quick Response Kitchen trailer was recently dispatched to Jemez Mountain Baptist Church to feed fire evacuees. This is your giving at work right here in New Mexico. Taking up the offering through Friday the 31st, if you’d still like to give.
Opening
Opening
Our current sermon series, Beloved, is a verse-by-verse look at the Song of Songs, a poetic celebration of an ideal romantic relationship, written by Solomon nearly 3000 years ago. The Song is a wonder of poetry, metaphor, and picturesque imagery that draws us into the feelings between this man (who I’m calling the Lover) and woman (the Beloved). While it’s notoriously difficult to understand, it’s been a joy to study it together so far.
Last week, we learned that God’s beautiful boundaries are not barriers to love, but guardians of it. They aren’t there to hinder love, but to protect love.
Most of us understand that idea in theory. The challenge comes in practice. Waiting is rarely easy. Patience is rarely natural. Whether in relationships, parenting, ministry, suffering, or our walk with Christ, we often find ourselves wanting tomorrow's gifts today.
So what does love look like while it waits?
How do we honor what God is doing in the present without rushing ahead of His timing?
This ideal couple is about to help us answer those questions through today’s passage.
So please open your Bibles or your Bible apps to Song of Songs chapter 2, and stand as you are able in honor of the recitation of God’s Word and follow along as I read our focal passage:
8 Listen! My love is approaching. Look! Here he comes, leaping over the mountains, bounding over the hills. 9 My love is like a gazelle or a young stag. See, he is standing behind our wall, gazing through the windows, peering through the lattice. 10 My love calls to me: Arise, my darling. Come away, my beautiful one. 11 For now the winter is past; the rain has ended and gone away. 12 The blossoms appear in the countryside. The time of singing has come, and the turtledove’s cooing is heard in our land. 13 The fig tree ripens its figs; the blossoming vines give off their fragrance. Arise, my darling. Come away, my beautiful one. 14 My dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the crevices of the cliff, let me see your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely. 15 Catch the foxes for us— the little foxes that ruin the vineyards— for our vineyards are in bloom. 16 My love is mine and I am his; he feeds among the lilies. 17 Until the day breaks and the shadows flee, turn around, my love, and be like a gazelle or a young stag on the divided mountains.
PRAYER
The Internet is an incredible thing, isn’t it? I remember back in the days before the Internet as we know it existed (I know, I’m old). Public access to the World Wide Web didn’t start until 1993, and our connection speed at the time what an incredible 14.4 Kbps. Downloading a song at that speed if everything was running perfectly took 46 minutes. Today, many home high speed connections are easily over 200 Mbps (about 14,000 times faster), and our 5G mobile devices often access the Internet faster than that, sometimes as fast as 1 Gbps (about 70,000 times faster than 14.4 Kbps). The same song would take 2 tenths of a second, or 4 hundredths of a second to download on those speeds, respectively. Downloading an HD movie (4 GB)? 32 seconds on 1 Gbps, 2 min 40 seconds at 200 Mbps, and would have taken a whopping 617 hours: nearly a MONTH of continuous downloading in 1993 (it’s okay...HD movies didn’t exist yet either). (mph comparison: dial-up: snail @ 0.03 mph; 200 Mbps: A-10 Thunderbolt: 420 mph; SR-71 Blackbird: 2,100 mph)
We have become conditioned to nearly instantaneous access to just about anything we want. Entertainment, news, information, shopping, all carried around in our pockets and available at truly a moment’s notice.
Do you think that this has had an impact on our patience? Our ability to wait responsibly? Of intentionally delaying gratification of our desires?
This is something that the Beloved in the Song warned the young women of Jerusalem about in the verse that ended last week’s passage:
7 Young women of Jerusalem, I charge you by the gazelles and the wild does of the field, do not stir up or awaken love until the appropriate time.
As I said in my introduction before we read our focal passage, waiting responsibly—being patient—can be really HARD. And some situations actually demand that we wait patiently if we’re going to see the outcomes that we truly want to see. Some things are worth waiting for.
In the Song, so far as we’ve considered the relationship between the Beloved and the Lover, we have seen that this is just the start. Their relationship is one of engagement, betrothal, or courtship. They are not married yet (the wedding begins at the end of chapter 3). And while we’ve seen that they are very much attracted to one another, the sexual side of their relationship is something that has to wait if they want to honor God, their families, and one another with their engagement. And they are both committed to the fact that it is worth waiting for, and they are going to manage the temptation responsibly.
But that doesn’t mean the passion, the romance, the pursuit aren’t there, because they are. They’re just not out of control. It’s a responsible pursuit, because the pursuit is tempered by patience and governed by a profession of love.
Let’s look at the pursuit first:
1: The Pursuit (8-13)
1: The Pursuit (8-13)
One thing that I want to keep reminding us as we go through the Song is what our interpretive framework is: I believe that this is a song about the ideal romantic love, penned by King Solomon nearer to the end of his life, looking back at the foolish choices that he made in this regard. In a way, he’s reflecting on what an Eden-type love might look like in the world that he lived in.
And the shepherd-king hero, the Lover, is so enthralled by his Beloved that he constantly desires to be with her, to be near her, to see her. So he pays her a visit at her house:
8 Listen! My love is approaching. Look! Here he comes, leaping over the mountains, bounding over the hills. 9 My love is like a gazelle or a young stag. See, he is standing behind our wall, gazing through the windows, peering through the lattice.
Nearly every action word in these two verses is the Lover, coming to see his betrothed. (The only one that isn’t him is “Look!”, “Listen!” is more like, “My love’s voice!”). But notice: he’s coming, he’s leaping, he’s bounding… you get the feeling that she’s looking out over the hills around her (parents’) house and sees him running and leaping over things on his way to visit her. He is in a hurry to be near her!
And then once he arrives, he’s still the one doing everything: he’s standing, he’s gazing, he’s peering. He’s taking action to show her how passionate he is for her. He’s not being domineering. He’s not being forceful or demanding. And no, he’s not being some kind of ancient peeping tom or stalker. They’re already betrothed. He just wants to be able to see her, even if only for a moment. He communicates his love for her through the actions that he takes, through the longing that he displays, through his presence and pursuit. She could have no doubt in her mind about his feelings toward her, because his actions make them clear.
Further, the references to the “gazelle or young stag” both here and at the end of the chapter actually serve to help us keep verse 7 rattling around in our minds as we think about this interaction. In fact, it’s as if this story is being given as an example of what it means to not awaken love until the appropriate time.
Gentlemen: The Lover’s actions prompt us to ask ourselves in particular: “Would my wife be confident of my love for her because of my actions?” And while it’s our role, guys, to actively pursue our wives, that doesn’t mean that, wives, you shouldn’t pursue your husbands at times. Remember that she is the one who went looking for him while he pastured his flocks back in chapter 1. And even here, she is looking for him, listening for him, waiting for him. Let this be a lesson to those who are not married, but want to be.
In verse 10, we the Lover speaks (but we’re getting it second-hand, reported by the Beloved through verse 13):
10 My love calls to me: Arise, my darling. Come away, my beautiful one. 11 For now the winter is past; the rain has ended and gone away. 12 The blossoms appear in the countryside. The time of singing has come, and the turtledove’s cooing is heard in our land. 13 The fig tree ripens its figs; the blossoming vines give off their fragrance. Arise, my darling. Come away, my beautiful one.
His invitation to her is actually a poem within a poem. He bookends it (a literary device called an inclusio) with two references to her: “my darling,” his favorite pet name for her, and “my beautiful one.” Remember that “my darling” isn’t primarily a romantic name, but a relational name that primarily means “companion,” or “friend.” He sees her as his partner, his equal, as well as his love interest. That’s of course not to say that he doesn’t appreciate her beauty, which he certainly does.
He’s not calling her to elope or to do anything improper. The word for “come away” ordinarily refers to walking. He’s asking her to go for a stroll. Why? Because spring has arrived. The weather is warmer, the sky is clear, and all around them are the signs of new life, reflecting the hope that they have for their own life together which is soon to begin.
Consider the imagery between the two bookends:
Winter is the rainy time in Israel, where it rarely snows except on the mountains. And now, the first blooms of wildflowers poke up from the undergrowth in the fields and hills, and the trees are filled with the sound of singing birds. Doves are cooing, probably referring to the “perch coo,” a mating call used by males to attract a female. Spring is kind of universally considered the season for love.
Do any of you remember the Disney movie, Bambi? When spring comes along, all of the animals of the forest become what Friend Owl calls, “twitterpated.” His explanation is terrifying to the trio of Bambi, Thumper, and Flower. “You begin to weak in the knees, your head’s in a whirl...you’re knocked for a loop, and you completely lose your head!… And you’d better be careful, because it can happen to anybody… It could happen to you!” Friend Owl makes it seem as though love is something that sneaks up on us and pounces, and there’s nothing we can do about it. And all three of the guys: Bambi, Thumper, and Flower fall victim to the seemingly unstoppable force of twitterpation.
We might think that this is what it’s like for our lovers here in the Song as well. But that’s not exactly true. There’s an interesting hint of restraint, even in the shepherd-king’s description of the verdancy around them: Verse 13 says that the “fig tree ripens its figs;” and, “the blossoming vines give off their fragrance.” The fig trees in Israel bear spring figs from old growth, called the breba crop, without any seeds in them. These figs are not as sweet, nor do they help propagate the species because they are sterile. But without this early production, the trees will not yield a crop of mature figs later on new growth. Furthermore, the vines are blossoming—they have not yet produced grapes. However, their fragrance makes a scented promise of future grapes. So notice: it’s not time for either figs or grapes—it’s not time for the harvest—but the harvest will come.
22 As long as the earth endures, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, and day and night will not cease.”
For the lovers in the Song, the spring around them is a reflection of their relationship. Yes, love is in the air around them, but that doesn’t mean that they should be irresponsible or foolish, trying to experience tomorrow’s gifts today. Instead, they can enjoy their time together without crossing the beautiful boundaries God has established.
They must be patient, which brings us to our second point.
2: The Patience (14-15)
2: The Patience (14-15)
Especially in modern thinking, we tend to see the ladies as kind of the “gatekeepers” of sexual purity in relationships—that somehow, guys are basically incapable of controlling their sexual urges, and therefore, women have to constantly play defense if things aren’t going to get out of hand. And given our hero’s obvious attraction to his Beloved and his drive to be near her, we could easily see the Song that way also. But is this actually true? Do men really lack self-control, and women need to make sure things don’t go too far?
Verses 8-13 were all her recollections of what her Lover said to her when he called her to “come away” with him. In verse 14, we break from her memory, and come to what he says to her right then:
14 My dove, in the clefts of the rock, in the crevices of the cliff, let me see your face, let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet, and your face is lovely.
Notice that this kind of dove in inaccessible: it’s in the clefts of the rock, the crevices of the cliff. This dove cannot be reached, cannot be touched. It can be seen, and it can be heard, but that’s it. If he called her to “come away” with him, why didn’t she? Did she say, “no,” to his invitation to go on a walk? Did her father tell her that she was not allowed to go spend time with her fiancé?
Nope. She didn’t reject him at all. I think that they’re on their walk together. It can’t be that she’s unavailable for a walk with him—they’ve already spent time together in the pasture (chapter 1). She’s not unavailable, she’s inaccessible. Their love is real, but for the moment, they are keeping their access restricted because the time isn’t right.
Remember back in chapter 1, when they met in the pasture, that the things that he said all stayed from the neck up?
9 I compare you, my darling, to a mare among Pharaoh’s chariots. 10 Your cheeks are beautiful with jewelry, your neck with its necklace. 11 We will make gold jewelry for you, accented with silver.
He’s still keeping things where they need to be: he can look upon her face, he can hear her voice (and he can kiss her, as we will see), but that’s it. She’s inaccessible because he’s being responsible in his pursuit of her—he’s exercising patience. It’s not that she said no to his invitation. It’s that he is taking responsibility for the purity of their relationship. The cliche idea that men have no ability to control themselves is a lie. But guys: you need to choose it in God’s strength and for God’s glory.
Look at what Job said:
1 I have made a covenant with my eyes. How then could I look at a young woman? 2 For what portion would I have from God above, or what inheritance from the Almighty on high?
Job's purity wasn't accidental. It was pre-decided. For Job, and for our shepherd-king in the Song, he’s just not going to go there until the time is right, because doing so would not only dishonor her, but would dishonor his relationship with God. To do so would awaken love before the appropriate time. And Paul wrote to the church at Thessalonica:
3 For this is God’s will, your sanctification: that you keep away from sexual immorality, 4 that each of you knows how to control his own body in holiness and honor, 5 not with lustful passions, like the Gentiles, who don’t know God.
Purity is a choice that must be made before you’re under pressure to make it. This demands patience—knowing that waiting for God’s perfect timing is best, and trusting His timing.
This brings us to verse 15, possibly the most important verse in this book for application. It’s so rich, in fact, that we’re going to camp on it for the next couple of Sundays. For this morning, however, we will keep verse 15 in the instant context of the lovers in the Song:
15 Catch the foxes for us— the little foxes that ruin the vineyards— for our vineyards are in bloom.
I believe that verse 15 is said by both of them. All of the pronouns in are first-person plural (“us,” “our”). The command to “catch” the little foxes is basically just announced to whomever is listening—even to themselves collectively. The point isn’t the who is supposed to catch these foxes, but the fact that the foxes must be caught. Why? Because foxes were, and still are, notorious for ruining vineyards.
Foxes are omnivores. They will eat anything they like. They’re also very agile, able to bypass ways to keep other animals out of a vineyard. Not only that, but they’re good at burrowing, so they can dig under those same obstacles, and in the process, ruin the roots of tender grapevines. They are a threat. Some commentators suggest that they aren’t really much of a threat because they are “little foxes.” This is foolish. As a general rule, foxes aren’t large. We have a dog named “Hunny.” She’s a chihuahua-terrier mix, and she’s a whopping 12 pounds—I carry her with one arm. 12 pounds—the average weight of a red fox. Saying foxes are “little” isn’t minimizing their threat level… it’s simply describing them.
The “little foxes” are a threat to the health of the vineyards of their love, which weren’t ready to be harvested yet. Did you notice the state of the vineyards? They are “in bloom.” Their desire for one another is blossoming, however, again, there are no grapes there—it’s not time for experiencing the harvest. Perhaps the most potent and dangerous “little fox” for engaged couples is that of sexual temptation. It seems that this could be the case for this couple, as the admonition not to awaken love and the command to catch the little foxes occur so close together in the Song.
But something that we will see over the next couple of weeks is that it’s often the little things, left unresolved, that cause big problems in relationships. I hope you’ll plan to be here for those messages.
Being patient as we wait for God’s best for us (and I don’t just mean in the context of the Song, but in just about anything) can sometimes be very difficult. This can be true in any relationship, as well as in things like employment, ministry, and spiritual growth, but can be especially difficult when we face suffering. God’s timing is often not our timing, as I mentioned in my introduction. We want God to give us His best when WE want His best for us, and let’s be honest—we usually want His best to look exactly like what we think would be best, rather than trusting Him for His plans. We HATE waiting. But Jeremiah in Lamentations wrote:
26 It is good to wait quietly for salvation from the Lord.
Waiting on God is good? “No, Bill...that can’t be right.” Scripture is full of this truth!
14 Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart be courageous. Wait for the Lord.
31 but those who trust in the Lord will renew their strength; they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not become weary, they will walk and not faint.
7 Therefore, brothers and sisters, be patient until the Lord’s coming. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth and is patient with it until it receives the early and the late rains. 8 You also must be patient. Strengthen your hearts, because the Lord’s coming is near.
God will produce patience in you as you trust Him and walk with Him. That’s why patience is a fruit of the Spirit:
22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, and self-control. The law is not against such things.
This isn’t to say that we’re to take on an irresponsible passivity, but rather, we are to obey God’s commands in the things that He instructs us to do, and trust Him in the things that really are outside of our ability to control.
But the world would tell us that being patient is the threat—if we don’t act in the way we desire to act, then we are going to miss out—especially when it comes to love. But again, the lovers in the Song show us that that isn’t the case at all. Their patience in their pursuit of one another shows the depth of their care for their future, not a cooling of their passion for each other. She makes this completely clear in the profession she makes in verse 16.
3: The Profession (16-17)
3: The Profession (16-17)
One of the beautiful things about the Song is that there is a mutuality of love on display between the Lover and the Beloved. They love each other passionately, and they readily declare that they belong to one another—not like slaves or possessions, but as true partners (which goes back to his name for her, “my darling”):
16 My love is mine and I am his; he feeds among the lilies.
The Beloved is the one making this declaration, but to a certain extent is speaking for them both. This profession of love says that the fact that right now they need to be patient doesn’t matter—neither of them is going anywhere. Their commitment to one another is firm. It doesn’t matter what “little foxes” come their way—they will do whatever it takes.
There are three such professions throughout the Song, each one said by the Beloved, and they form a progression of sorts. The next one in is 6:3:
3 I am my love’s and my love is mine; he feeds among the lilies.
and the last one is in 7:10:
10 I am my love’s, and his desire is for me.
Notice the progression: in the first in today’s focal passage speaks first of how the Lover is hers, then how she is his. The second one reverses that order, and the last one doesn’t even mention that the Lover is hers, but only that she belongs to him. As she becomes more and more secure in his love for her, she thinks less and less about what she is getting, and more and more about what she is giving. We can assume that that Lover feels the same way.
And this is truly what defines an intimate relationship of any kind: when both people are primarily concerned with being givers in the relationship, instead of takers. Whether we’re talking about romance or friendship, both parties intentionally giving to the other is vital to intimacy.
The last phrase of verse 16 is an odd one: He feeds among the lilies. The words lily/lilies appear 8 times in the Song, but the context is inconsistent. Perhaps her lips are the lilies in this passage, and they are sealing their commitment to one another, with a kiss (or kissing).
One of the ways that this passage reflects our relationship with God is that God has chosen that our relationship to Him also has a mutuality aspect, though not exactly like the lovers in the Song:
7 For he is our God, and we are the people of his pasture, the sheep under his care. Today, if you hear his voice: 8 Do not harden your hearts as at Meribah, as on that day at Massah in the wilderness 9 where your ancestors tested me; they tried me, though they had seen what I did.
We’re in the place of the Beloved in this example. He is our God, and we are his people if we belong to Him by faith—the sheep of His pasture. Jesus is the Good Shepherd who laid down His life for us, dying on the cross so we could be forgiven and adopted as God’s very own children. We deserve death because of our sin—the ways that we reject God and rebel against Him. But Christ paid our penalty, and then overcame death in our place as well, so that if we trust in Him for our salvation, then we will have eternal life in Him also. And He calls to us by His Holy Spirit: “Come away with me!” Do not harden your hearts against His loving call this morning. Profess your faith in Jesus Christ!
This brings us to our last verse, which has garnered a wide variety of interpretations.
17 Until the day breaks and the shadows flee, turn around, my love, and be like a gazelle or a young stag on the divided mountains.
I believe that there are two keys to understanding this verse: First, the word for “turn around” means to change direction, but it is always used for turning away from someone or something, not towards it. Second, the word translated “divided” literally means “ravine or gorge.” Many read the divided mountains as the Beloved’s breasts, but I don’t believe this is the case. It doesn’t fit with the rest of the passage and the themes of responsibility and patience.
Instead, I would interpret it this way:
Until the day breaks: The right day, the day that they are married;
and the shadows flee: the shadows of sin if they were to dishonor their marriage bed.
Turn around: turn away and as you came, so go back (be like a gazelle or a young stag). Go back the way you came.
on the divided mountains: across what would keep them apart, whether that be physical distance or geographic obstacle. Basically—to the mountains that keep us apart.
The reference to his being like a gazelle or a young stag is very important. This forms another inclusio, which began in verses 8 and 9, bracketing the relationship in the framework of him coming to her and his returning home, as they await their wedding. She’s not rejecting him. His leaving protects them both from temptation.
Closing
Closing
Five times she calls him “my love” in this passage, including in verse 17 when she tells him to turn away from her. Just because they can’t stay with each other just yet, that doesn’t mean that her love has grown weaker. In fact, the responsibility and restraint that the lovers show in their pursuit of one another says that their love is mature: Mature love is not merely passionate enough to pursue one another. It is disciplined enough to protect one another.
Thinking back to the beginning of this message, did you notice how this passage starts? It says, “Listen! My love is approaching.” And when she hears him, her heart it opened to his arrival. Listen! The voice of the One who loves you! Will you believe in Jesus and surrender to Him today?
Salvation
Baptism
Church Membership
Giving
Prayer
PRAYER
Closing Remarks
Closing Remarks
Neighboring Moment (I had to shorten this a little):
One of our families has set up a “TrinketTrade Box” on their property, and each week kids and their parents come by to trade trinkets with the box. It’s allowed this family to build relationships and share the unexpected love of Jesus.
One special moment with the box was when a mom brought her son by on his birthday, and encouraged him to get a trinket, as they didn’t have enough money to buy him anything. This church member was able to give them not only the trinket, but a few dollars they had on hand, and even a children’s Bible. The boy was overjoyed.
Bible reading
Pastor’s Study tonight
Prayer Meeting Weds
Instructions for guests
Benediction
Benediction
22 Flee from youthful passions, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart.
