Does god care when we hurt?

INTRODUCTION

Look at Romans 8:28 with me on the screens.

Romans 8:28 KJV 1900

28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

This is a tough truth. Christians believe that the God who made the universe is in control of everything.

How can we believe that? If there is a God in charge of everything why would he let bad things happen? How can we believe that God is full of power when he lets our families break up, kids get bullied, loved ones die unexpectedly, or babies die?

These are questions everyone should ask, and indeed you might currently be asking… watch this movie clip with me…

If we stopped the movie right here, you'd think this was the end.

But you know something the characters don't know: the story isn't over.

And sometimes suffering feels like we're watching our lives at the worst possible moment and saying, “God, this is the end.” But for the Christian, suffering is never the end of the story.

Turn with me in your Bibles to John 11. We’re going to look at one story about Jesus and what it tells us about suffering. From this story, we’ll see that God really is in charge, and that he really does care.

WHEN JESUS DOESN’T COME

Mary and Martha were two of Jesus’s best friends. They’d welcomed Jesus to their house and hear him teach (Luke 10:38-42).

One day, their brother Lazarus got sick. Really sick. But Mary and Martha knew a miracle worker. Thousands of sick people had come to Jesus, and he’d healed them. So they sent Jesus a message.

John 11:3 KJV 1900

3 Therefore his sisters sent unto him, saying, Lord, behold, he whom thou lovest is sick.

You’d think that Jesus would come at once, right? But no. Notice John 11:5-6

John 11:5–6 KJV 1900

5 Now Jesus loved Martha, and her sister, and Lazarus. 6 When he had heard therefore that he was sick, he abode two days still in the same place where he was.

How weird is that? John doesn’t say, “Jesus loved his friends, but he was super busy with others things, so he couldn’t come right away.” He doesn’t say, “Jesus didn’t love his friends, so he thought he’d make them wait.”

John says that because Jesus loved his friends, he didn’t come. In fact, Jesus waited until Lazarus was dead. And then he came.

What do we learn from this? One thing we learn is that there are times when God intends for us to suffer, not because he doesn’t love us but because he does.

We may not understand it at the time, but we know that Jesus loved Mary and Martha and Lazarus, and because he loved them, he didn’t come.

Maybe you’ve had suffering in your life, and you’ve prayed really hard for God to take it away. Maybe you prayed and prayed that your parents would stop fighting, but instead they got divorced. Maybe a family member has gotten really sick, and you prayed for them to get better. But they didn’t.

*write down in the lines below a time where you were suffering and you just wanted God to take it away.

If God loves us and he is in charge, we might think he’d take sad things away when we ask. Sometimes he does. But sometimes he doesn’t. Just like when Mary and Martha called for Jesus and he didn’t come.

But that’s not the end of the story. Notice next…

JESUS COMES

When Jesus finally comes, Lazarus has been dead and buried for four days. Look at John 11:21-22

John 11:21–22 KJV 1900

21 Then said Martha unto Jesus, Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died. 22 But I know, that even now, whatsoever thou wilt ask of God, God will give it thee.

Isn’t her faith amazing? Martha believes Jesus can heal her brother even though he’s been dead for days! So does Jesus rush to bring Lazarus back from the dead? No. Instead they talk.

John 11:23–24 KJV 1900

23 Jesus saith unto her, Thy brother shall rise again. 24 Martha saith unto him, I know that he shall rise again in the resurrection at the last day.

And yet we can almost hear her thinking, But what about now, Jesus? What about now? Why won’t you help me now?

The Bible promises that God will put everything right for his people in the end. We’ve been seeing this truth in Revelation for the last 9 months. When Jesus comes back as King, there will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain.

But… sometimes that doesn’t feel very comforting.

Martha believes that her brother will come back to life at the end of time. But she wants him back now. She knows how powerful Jesus is. She knows he could raise Lazarus right away. But he doesn’t. Instead, Jesus looks into this heartbroken women’s eyes and says these astonishing words:

John 11:25–26 KJV 1900

25 Jesus said unto her, I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: 26 And whosoever liveth and believeth in me shall never die. Believest thou this?

And maybe you're here tonight and you've never actually trusted Jesus. Notice what Jesus doesn't say. He doesn't say, “Martha, if you believe hard enough, you'll get everything you want.” He says, “Believe in me.”

Christianity isn't ultimately about getting God to fix your life. It's about coming to Jesus. Because Jesus isn't simply someone who can give you resurrection. Jesus is the resurrection and the life.

And that means the most important question isn't, “Will God make my life easier?”The most important question is, “Do I belong to Jesus?”

Instead of giving Martha her wish, Jesus tells her that what she most needs is not Lazarus, but Jesus himself. He is the resurrection and the life.

Sometimes, if we’re honest, we want a gift more than we want the giver.

Imagine your favorite artist announces they're coming to Seattle. And you've been waiting for this for months. You finally get tickets. You're counting down the days.

But then, the day of the concert, something happens. You can't go. Maybe you're sick. Maybe your parents have to work. Maybe something completely outside your control happens.

And you're devastated.

Someone comes to you and says, “I've got something even better for you.” And you're like, “I don't care. I don't want something better. I want to go to that concert.”

Why? Because you've already decided what will make you happy.

And sometimes we do exactly that with God. We come to God and say, “God, I need you to fix this. I need you to heal this person. I need you to fix my family. I need you to change this situation.” And those aren't wrong things to ask God for. We should pray about those things. But sometimes we become so focused on the gift that we forget about the Giver.

And that’s the lesson Jesus was teaching Mary and Martha…

Jesus isn't just the one who gives us what we need. Jesus is what we need most. He is the resurrection and the life.

God is not merely the greatest gift giver in the history of the world. He’s the greatest gift. And he (God) meets us most tenderly in our suffering.

And these next verses are powerful.

JESUS WEEPS

John 11:27 KJV 1900

27 She saith unto him, Yea, Lord: I believe that thou art the Christ, the Son of God, which should come into the world.

Martha calls Mary, who falls at Jesus’s feet, and repeats her sister’s complaint:

John 11:32 KJV 1900

32 Then when Mary was come where Jesus was, and saw him, she fell down at his feet, saying unto him, Lord, if thou hadst been here, my brother had not died.

Like Mary and Martha, we can cry out to God in our suffering. In fact, the book of Psalms in the Bible is full of suffering people crying out to God and asking why he isn’t helping them.

If you’re a follower of Jesus, you’ll find yourself in that place before long. Lying, like Mary, at Jesus’s feet and wondering why he didn’t answer your prayer.

So how does Jesus react to Mary? And how does he react to us, when we cry out in our pain?

Jesus asks where Lazarus’s body has been laid. And then we read one of the shortest and most surprising verses in the Bible:

John 11:35 KJV 1900

35 Jesus wept.

Why is Jesus so upset? If he had come when Mary and Martha called, Lazarus would not have died, and no one would be crying now.

When people saw Jesus weeping, some thought he must have loved Lazarus very much. But notice what others asked in John 11:36-37

John 11:36–37 KJV 1900

36 Then said the Jews, Behold how he loved him! 37 And some of them said, Could not this man, which opened the eyes of the blind, have caused that even this man should not have died?

The answer is, yes. Jesus could have stopped Lazarus from dying. He chose not to. But even so, he cried with his friends.

Jesus is not faraway God, watching us suffer from a distance. He is the God who steps into our suffering. The Prophet Isaiah calls him a “man of sorrows” (Isaiah 53:3), and we see in the Gospels how Jesus hurts for hurting people.

Jesus weeps with us when we weep. He knows the end of the story, when he will one day wipe every tear from our eyes. But this does not stop him from holding us now in our pain. In fact, pain is a place of special closeness with him.

Perhaps you’ve noticed this in your own life. We can laugh with anyone. But we tend to cry only with those closest to us; and the bond is strongest when their suffering matches ours, because we know they really understand.

In Jesus, we find the one person who knows all our heartache and our pain.

Jesus was abandoned by his closest friends, beaten by strangers, stripped, abused, and hung up on a cross to die. If you’ve ever been let down or teased or bullied or felt alone or got terribly sick, Jesus knows how you feel. There is no wound of ours he cannot touch. He knows the end of the story, when he will make a whole new better world. And yet he weeps with us when we weep.

But that’s not the end of the story…

JESUS SAVES

When Jesus comes to Lazarus’s tomb, he is deeply upset again, and he commands that the gravestone be taken away.

John 11:39 KJV 1900

39 Jesus said, Take ye away the stone. Martha, the sister of him that was dead, saith unto him, Lord, by this time he stinketh: for he hath been dead four days.

But Jesus insists… John 11:43-44

John 11:43–44 KJV 1900

43 And when he thus had spoken, he cried with a loud voice, Lazarus, come forth. 44 And he that was dead came forth, bound hand and foot with graveclothes: and his face was bound about with a napkin. Jesus saith unto them, Loose him, and let him go.

If you haven’t been close to people who have died, it’s easy to forget that you’ll die one day yourself. But believers can be confident that when death comes, Jesus will be with them. And one day, when our bodies have rotted and our lives have been forgotten, Jesus will call us out of our graves.

The one who called stars into being will also call believers back from death to life. Jesus isn’t just loving. He’s also powerful.

If we’re trusting in Jesus, we’re holding resurrection power. Nothing can take it away from us, because nothing can snatch us away from Jesus, who is the resurrection and the life.

Lazarus was raised to die again. Jesus was raised never to die again.

The only man who has ever beaten death beat death for us. And he promised to give us life: not just for a few more years, but forever.

Jesus didn't come into the world merely to make Lazarus's funeral better. He came to defeat the enemy that caused every funeral in the first place. And that's why Jesus eventually went to a cross.

He died for sinners. He took the judgment our sin deserved. And three days later, he rose from the grave.

So when Jesus says, “I am the resurrection and the life,” he's not making a nice religious statement. He's telling you who he is.

And then he asks Martha a question that he asks every one of us: “Believest thou this?”

IS IT WORTH IT?

So the question we must ask when we’re suffering is this: What could possibly be worth it? Worth all of the suffering?

Jesus’s flabbergasting claim is that he is. If you’re trusting in Jesus, you can be sure that any suffering you face is not because he doesn’t love you, but because he does.

This doesn’t mean we’ll always understand. Often, we won’t.

We don't know how every story is going to turn out.

We don't know what God will do with every sickness. We don't know why every prayer gets answered the way it does. We don't know why some people are healed and others aren't. We don't know why some families stay together and others don't.

But we know Jesus. And that's what Mary and Martha needed to learn.

Jesus didn't give them an explanation first. He gave them himself. “I am the resurrection, and the life.”

So if Jesus was willing to suffer and die for us, we can trust him even with our most terrible hurts. He is the resurrection and the life. He is writing our story right to the end. And if we’re trusting in him, that ending will be unimaginably good (Romans 8:18).

So when you suffer, don't measure God's love by your circumstances. Look at the cross.

And when you're afraid of what comes next, don't put your hope in an easier life. Put your hope in Jesus.

He is the resurrection. He is the life.

And the question he asked Martha is the question he asks you: “Believest thou this?”

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

Why do you think suffering can make us question whether God really cares about us?

Have you ever prayed for God to change a situation but He didn't answer in the way you hoped? What was that experience like?

How does knowing that Jesus understands suffering change the way you respond to your own pain?

Why is the resurrection such an important source of hope when Christians experience suffering, sickness, or death?

PRAYER PROMPTS

Pray that we would trust God even when we don't understand what He is doing or why He allows us to suffer.

Pray that we would want Jesus Himself more than we want Him to simply fix our circumstances.

Pray for anyone in our group who is currently hurting, struggling, or going through something difficult. Ask God to remind them that He cares.

Pray that we would bring our honest questions, fears, and disappointments to God instead of running away from Him.

Pray that the hope of Jesus' resurrection would give us courage when we face sickness, suffering, loss, and the fear of death.

Pray for someone we know who is hurting right now. Ask God to help us be a source of Christ's love and comfort to them.