Dealing With Pain
Notes
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It is very humorous at times to watch children react when some kind of pain is introduced into their lives. Now, I don’t mean when they are actually in a significant amount of pain and discomfort. When your kids are sick, there is nothing funny about that. I mean when something small happens to them and you know they are overreacting. When they are really young and your baby isn’t getting his way instantly and he starts to cry sometimes that is humorous. After five kids we are able to tell when our little ones are overreacting. I love it when babies cry and no sound comes out of them, and you think to your self- breathe kid, breathe. Or when your four year old stubs his toe and screams bloody murder. They do it for a reason, because they are in an amount of pain, and they only know one way to deal with that pain. They know nothing else that works as effectively as crying and making a fuss. Even if it is ridiculous and ineffective it is the only way they know to deal with pain.
Sometimes, believers act in ways that are silly and ineffective in order to deal with pain, or irritation, or suffering in their lives. We deal with difficulties in our lives in an un-biblical manner because we nothing else seems to be working, and all we can think about is getting some relief.
Job has made the progression in his argument to now viewing God as a threat in his life. He is still in pain and suffering. He is still in the eyes of the community an outcast, guilty of the punishment that God has devastated him with. First, Job asked God to simply end his life. When that did not work he asked God to vindicate him. God has not yet done that, so now Job is taking matters into his own hands. He is in pain, and since nothing else is working Job will now attempt to get himself out of his painful situation. None of the solutions that his fiends offered him have been effective. So, we are now on to round two of Job responding to bad counsel. Unfortunately Job attempts to eliminate his pain in poor manner. And his attempt to eliminate his pain ultimately leads him to distrust and to distance himself from God.
What are some reasons that would cause us to attempt to avoid pain or suffering in our life in an unbiblical manner?
I. When we are no longer certain what to believe about God.
I. When we are no longer certain what to believe about God.
A. Job’s Previous Beliefs
A. Job’s Previous Beliefs
Behold, God will not cast away a perfect man,
Neither will he help the evil doers:
Job’s previous belief is represented by Bildad in chapter 8, and is a succinct recap of retribution theology. God always blesses righteousness in this life, and punished evil doers in this life. This is Bildad’s (and previously was Job’s) standard of justice and righteousness that they knew God to operate by. But now, Job is no longer certain he can believe this about God, because it no longer works with his present circumstances. Job is a perfect or an mature believer in God, and yet God (so it seems to Job) has still cast him away. Job is not an evil doer, yet God (so it seems to Job) will not help him. So while Job’s friends are still absolutely certain about what they believe about God (retribution theology), Job no longer can be.
B. Job’s Present Confusion
B. Job’s Present Confusion
20 If I justify myself, mine own mouth shall condemn me:
If I say, I am perfect, it shall also prove me perverse.
21 Though I were perfect, yet would I not know my soul:
I would despise my life.
V. 20- Though I am just (in the right, innocent)
V. 21- Though I am perfect (blameless, free of guilt), I do not care for myself, I despise my life.
The Book of Job (c) Job’s Misgivings about Arguing His Case before God (9:14–24)
The conviction of his own moral purity does not ease the deep sense of meaninglessness he feels from his anguish, fed by the lack of any sense of God’s presence or any insight into his design
Job is frustrated because he knows himself to be innocent of any sin that would warrant this kind of suffering from God. Yet he also believes that he can never prove his innocence and regain his life, so he despises his life.
Then in vv. 22-24 Job directly contradicts retribution theology. And in so doing, issues a serious complaint against God.
God destroys both the blameless and the wicked.
22 This is one thing, therefore I said it,
He destroyeth the perfect and the wicked.
The innocent die brutally
23 If the scourge slay suddenly,
He will laugh at the trial of the innocent.
The Book of Job (c) Job’s Misgivings about Arguing His Case before God (9:14–24)
scourge (šôṭ) means “whip” or “plague” and applies to a devastating judgment that brings widespread death
He will laugh- means that God gladly lets them vainly cry out for help as a part of their suffering. He lets them struggle hopelessly until they die.
The wicked subdue whole lands
24 The earth is given into the hand of the wicked:
He covereth the faces of the judges thereof;
If not, where, and who is he?
God gives a land or a nation into the power of the wicked. These wicked rulers coerce and exploit for their own profit. They dominate the law courts by threats and bribes. It appears that God covers the faces of the judges so that they allow the mighty to exploit the poor and the weak to build their own wealth.
Then Job ends the verse with a poignant charge in the form of a question.
If not, where- the word “where” is better translated “then”
If not (he), then, who is it?
The Book of Job (c) Job’s Misgivings about Arguing His Case before God (9:14–24)
Given the fact that injustices exist throughout the land and that there is only one God, one can only conclude that God himself is the cause of these injustices. Job’s questioning leads him to wonder if God is really just.
Illustration:
Beyond Suffering: Discovering the Message of Job Job: Seeking a Mediator, Soliciting His Maker (Job 9–10)
C. S. Lewis married Joy late in life. Not long after, he watched helplessly as cancer sunk its claws into his wife’s life. He recounted much of his internal wrestling in A Grief Observed. The parallels between Lewis and Job are remarkable.
Beyond Suffering: Discovering the Message of Job Job: Seeking a Mediator, Soliciting His Maker (Job 9–10)
I tried to put some of these thoughts to C. this afternoon. He reminded me that the same thing seems to have happened to Christ: “Why hast thou forsaken me?” I know. Does that make it easier to understand? Not that I am (I think) in much danger of ceasing to believe in God. The real danger is of coming to believe that God is far different than what I always thought. The question I am faced with is not, “So, there is no God after all?” Rather, it is, “So, this is what God is like?”
Beyond Suffering: Discovering the Message of Job Job: Seeking a Mediator, Soliciting His Maker (Job 9–10)
That Lewis (like Job) later describes these doubts as “filth and nonsense” does not diminish the reality with which they press down upon the sufferer. Not every sufferer thinks such thoughts but many have, both in and out of the Bible. These are not thoughts to be pretended away but confronted head-on with Scriptures (a luxury Job apparently did not possess) that remind us of what God really is like despite all appearances to the contrary.
Refutation:
We must again remember who is the cause of Job’s suffering? Satan is. And he is cruel in his working out the suffering in Job’s life because he makes it appear that God is the one causing the suffering. Now, God does allow the suffering in Job’s life, but Satan is the cause.
Yet God does allow Job, a blameless man, to suffer- and to suffer to a great degree, and for an extended length of time. And now that Job is no longer certain what to believe about God, he is taking matters into his own hands in finding a way to deal with his pain.
Application:
Are you in Job’s position right now? Do you no longer know what to believe about God because of the pain that is present in your life at the moment? These are not thoughts to be pretended away, but confronted head-on with Scriptures! We have been going over the attributes of God on Wednesdays. Only a high view of God- a view that sees an infinite, transcendent, eternal, immutable, omniscient, omnipotent, faithful, good, just, merciful, gracious, loving, holy, and sovereign God- will be able to carry you through the difficulties, sufferings, and pain that God allows into your life. Confront your doubts with faith in the inspired word of God- only then can you manage difficulties they way God intended.
12 For the which cause I also suffer these things: nevertheless I am not ashamed: for I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed unto him against that day.
II. When we believe that there is no other solution
II. When we believe that there is no other solution
A. I don’t have time for that
A. I don’t have time for that
25 Now my days are swifter than a post:
They flee away, they see no good.
26 They are passed away as the swift ships:
As the eagle that hasteth to the prey.
He knows his time is coming to an end quickly (25-6).
“Although the moments go by slowly, Job is also aware that his life is flying by with no apparent improvement and will soon be over.” (Hartley, 179).
3 similes regarding the brevity of his life:
(a) As a swift runner.
(b) As a reed boat – “Made out of reeds, had wooden keels, and they were very light (cf. Isa. 18:1-2). They traveled so fast that they seemed to skim over the water.”
(c) Eagle/falcon – swoops down at great speed (Pope estimates 150 mph)
Job feels like his time is running out. He no longer has the luxury of waiting on the Lord, so he must take matters into his own hands.
Parents- when you kids are misbehaving, and you just want some relief from the “suffering”, tempted to just yell at them. Why? Because I don’t have the time to deal with this God’s way.
Husbands / wives- instead of trusting God to work in the hearts of your spouse, or sitting down and having a peaceable conversation- we yell at one another. (I don’t have the time to do anything else) We try to manage away the pain of parenting or of marriage through an unbiblical way, because we feel there is no other solution.
B. I’ve tried that already
B. I’ve tried that already
27 If I say, I will forget my complaint,
I will leave off my heaviness, and comfort myself:
28 I am afraid of all my sorrows,
I know that thou wilt not hold me innocent.
Job has made a resolution with himself. He is going to forget his complaint against God.
Leave off my heaviness-
“Leave off”- to restore, to bring back into original existence, use, function, or position.
“Heaviness”- lit. face- in the context it is talking about Job’s countenance or the feeling conveyed by a person’s face.
So Job is saying I will forget my complaint, I will restore my countenance, and comfort (be happy).
I will change my sad countenance and instead I will be joyful and cheerful.
But Job’s resolution comes to a sudden end. His effort to be positive and to be happy dies with the onslaught of sudden pain.
I am afraid of all my sorrows, I know you will not hold me innocent.
The Book of Job (2) Job’s Inability to Demonstrate His Innocence (9:25–35)
The appalling reality of his pain convinces him that God will not acquit him. No amount of hopeful thinking can calm his thoughts, which are troubled by God’s seemingly capricious power.
I tried to just be happy- to rejoice in sufferings, but it failed miserably!
29 If I be wicked,
Why then labour I in vain?
30 If I wash myself with snow water,
And make my hands never so clean;
31 Yet shalt thou plunge me in the ditch,
And mine own clothes shall abhor me.
In every possible way, God makes him appear guilty
(1) It seems pointless to make himself appear righteous for God makes him appear guilty (29). “One could cryptically translate the verse: ‘I’m guilty. Why bother?’”
(2) Washing/cleansing won’t make him seem innocent to others [note how Pilate washed his hands].(30)
(3) Even if his actions did clear his name, God would make him appear guilty again by “plunging him back into a ‘quagmire of filth.’”
How many times have we excused some kind of sin in our lives, because we have used the excuse, “I’ve tried God’s way already, and it didn’t work.” At least not in our timeline.
I’ve tried God’s way it didn’t work so I am justified in yelling at my kids.
I’ve tried God way and it didn’t work so husbands and wives, as Paul says in Galatians, we bite and devour one another.
Because, we attempt to manage away the pain and difficulty in our lives in an unbiblical manner. We excuse our sin by saying nothing else works.
C. God doesn’t understand what I am going through
C. God doesn’t understand what I am going through
Job feels that an arbiter could resolve his problem by mediating between him and God (32-35).
a) Given all the above considerations, he believes that no man can enter into any negotiation with God (32).
32 For he is not a man, as I am, that I should answer him,
And we should come together in judgment.
b) Job therefore wishes for an arbiter to help him (33).
33 Neither is there any daysman betwixt us,
That might lay his hand upon us both.
Daysman- arbiter, mediator- a negotiator who acts as a link between parties; sometimes specifically selected.
c) If there were such an arbiter, then Job is certain his situation would be different (34-5).
34 Let him take his rod away from me,
And let not his fear terrify me:
35 Then would I speak, and not fear him;
But it is not so with me.
Why does Job believe he needs an arbiter or a mediator in the first place? Job wants to argue his case before God, he wants to please his innocence. And Job is certain that if such an arbiter could be found that God would change the way he is acting towards him. In other words Job believes that God does not understand him or his situation completely. If only God knew the truth, then I would be free from this pain and suffering. Since God obviously has made a mistake and doesn’t understand fully what I am facing, I will go ahead and manage my pain in my own way.
Job’s desire to bring a lawsuit against God seems obscure to us, until we understand what he is trying to do with it. He is now beginning to exhibit the response we all have in similar situations – trying to find a way to self-protect or eliminate pain by using whatever resources he has available. Job is too moral and too mature a believer to turn to overtly sinful actions, but he will attempt to use what he views as his greatest personal resource - his character and his knowledge of legal procedure (He is very much involved in government affairs, has been a participant in the adjudication of many lawsuits, and feels quite at home in the legal sphere – see ch 30-31). Of course, as godly as he was and as knowledgeable in the legal realm as he was, these resources were not really able to protect him or resolve the issue for him. Only God could do that.
So, what personal resources might people resort to in an attempt to deal with trauma?
A person who feels alienated and alone in the world (i.e. “God has made me a social outcast”) may resort to homosexuality in an attempt to gain a sense of belonging/the feeling that somebody wants me.
An adult who is only an occasional drinker but who thinks it is okay may resort to alcohol as their best available resource to cope (i.e. I cannot face the level of pain that God is making me face, so I will drink/take drugs).
People who have some Christian maturity may feel that if they can only repent well enough or identify some hidden sin, they can get out of the painful situation.
The problem with relying on any of these resources is that they will not work since suffering is determined by the sovereign God who allowed it. Some of these are inherently immoral and some are not, but all are wrong in that they bypass God (a sin no matter what the issue is) in an attempt to protect myself from pain in self-destructive ways.
So how about you this morning Christian? Are you trying to manage away the pain in your life that has been God ordained, in an unbiblical manner? What excuses are you believing in order to permit sin in your life?
Have you bought into the lie that there is no other solution for your pain? Are you attempting to bypass God in your suffering. How are you dealing with pain?
III. When we fundamentally misunderstand what God is trying to accomplish
III. When we fundamentally misunderstand what God is trying to accomplish
A. Job’s Demand
A. Job’s Demand
1 My soul is weary of my life;
I will leave my complaint upon myself;
I will speak in the bitterness of my soul.
2 I will say unto God, Do not condemn me;
Shew me wherefore thou contendest with me.
Do not condemn me- Do not treat me as if I am already guilty. You never even gave me a trial or a fair hearing, how can you already treat me as if I am guilty?
Shew me why you contend against me-
The Book of Job (1) A Complaint against God (10:1–7)
Behind this request is the conviction that a plaintiff is obligated to make known to a defendant whom he intends to take to court the charges that he has against him, Job does not question God’s right to punish him, but he thinks that God must try him officially before acting with such hostility against one who has been faithful.
Now why did God allow Job to be treated as guilty? God was testing Job in order to vindicate God’s trust in Job before Satan. Do you think Job’s attitude towards his pain would have been different if he understood all of this?
The Book of Job (1) A Complaint against God (10:1–7)
But for his testing to be as severe as possible Job must be unaware of God’s confidence, for trust in God is tested to the ultimate when circumstantial evidence calls into question the integrity of one’s devotion to God. God’s silence intensifies a person’s testing far more than physical and emotional pain.
This is where our faith in God’s fundamental purpose in our life must kick in. God is according to Romans 8:28-29 working all things out for out good in order to conform us to the image of Christ. If we fail to get that, if we fundamentally misunderstand God’s purposes in our pain then we will attempt to manage away the pain in an unbiblical manner.
B. Job’s Wondering
B. Job’s Wondering
1. He wonders what God could gain by such harsh actions (3).
3 Is it good unto thee that thou shouldest oppress,
That thou shouldest despise the work of thine hands,
And shine upon the counsel of the wicked?
Job demonstrates in 10:3-7 a fundamental misunderstanding of what God is attempting to accomplish. Particularly in verse 3, Job suggests that God has thrown him away, like some part of the past that one is now tired of.
In reality, he has been the focus of God’s attention. God actually IS vindicating Job beyond his wildest dreams; he just does not know it at the moment. Furthermore, he is doing so in a way that will provide immediate benefit to his friends as their bad theology will be corrected and in a way that ultimately wound up as a book of scripture.
2. He wonders why God acts as a mere mortal (4-7)
4 Hast thou eyes of flesh?
Or seest thou as man seeth?
5 Are thy days as the days of man?
Are thy years as man’s days,
6 That thou inquirest after mine iniquity,
And searchest after my sin?
7 Thou knowest that I am not wicked;
And there is none that can deliver out of thine hand.
3. He wonders why God mistreats his own creation (8-12).
a) Summary: Job cannot understand why after all the care God has given him, He is now allowing this to take place.
b) God had created him (8-11).
(1) The intricacy of God’s creative work makes this even more difficult to understand.
(2) This is poetic language describing the journey from fertilized egg to person with flesh
8 Thine hands have made me and fashioned me
Together round about; yet thou dost destroy me.
9 Remember, I beseech thee, that thou hast made me as the clay;
And wilt thou bring me into dust again?
10 Hast thou not poured me out as milk,
And curdled me like cheese?
11 Thou hast clothed me with skin and flesh,
And hast fenced me with bones and sinews.
c) God had cared for him (12)
12 Thou hast granted me life and favour,
And thy visitation hath preserved my spirit.
4. He wonders why God makes him look guilty regardless of what he does (13-17).
a) God concealed the trials Job was to have to make them more intense (13).
13 And these things hast thou hid in thine heart:
I know that this is with thee.
b) God knew of anything that Job did.(14)
14 If I sin, then thou markest me,
And thou wilt not acquit me from mine iniquity.
c) Job’s innocence or guilt seems irrelevant – God is his adversary in either case (15).
15 If I be wicked, woe unto me;
And if I be righteous, yet will I not lift up my head.
I am full of confusion; therefore see thou mine affliction;
d) God’s opposition is unrelenting (16-17).
(1) God stalks him like a lion.(16).
16 For it increaseth. Thou huntest me as a fierce lion:
And again thou shewest thyself marvellous upon me.
(2) He does so by multiplying witnesses against him and multiplying his hardships (17).
17 Thou renewest thy witnesses against me,
And increasest thine indignation upon me;
Changes and war are against me.
(3) ILLUS: he is like an enemy that has no mercy. Most coaches will let up a bit by putting in reserves if a game is out of reach. It takes either an intense hatred or a demented coach to avoid doing so.
5. He again wishes he might have died (18-19).
18 Wherefore then hast thou brought me forth out of the womb?
Oh that I had given up the ghost, and no eye had seen me!
19 I should have been as though I had not been;
I should have been carried from the womb to the grave.
6. He again wishes for a season of peace before he dies (20-22).
20 Are not my days few? cease then,
And let me alone, that I may take comfort a little,
21 Before I go whence I shall not return,
Even to the land of darkness and the shadow of death;
22 A land of darkness, as darkness itself;
And of the shadow of death, without any order,
And where the light is as darkness.
All of this points to a fundamental misunderstanding by Job of what God was accomplishing in his life.
Illustration:
Story of working on an Indian reservation all day in hot weather. Then for supper the people that ran the camp only gave us a half cup of rice, because that was what a significant portion of the world had to eat, and we needed to experience what that was like. Ya sure, ok can we really eat now? No more food. So we started piling into the van to head to town to get some more food. Then they stopped us and I think a little disappointedly called us back and gave us a meal. We fundamentally misunderstood what they were trying to accomplish, so we took matters into our own hands.
So we too as believer’s if we fail to trust God, and know what he has in store for us we will take matters into our own hands to manage away the pain.
The question is not actually “how can I get God to do what I need him to do for me right now?” Rather, it is “how will God ultimately use this?” The very fact that something has happened is a partial answer to that question, for you know that whatever the future holds, it will now involve having gone through this event. But it is a mistake to go too much beyond that and we should resist the temptation to answer the “how will God use it” question too soon.
The gospel is no guarantee that we will have less misery than Job. Rather the gospel has brought with it a sharing of Christ’s sufferings.
10 That I may know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the fellowship of his sufferings, being made conformable unto his death;
In fact Paul says that we should
3 And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; 4 And patience, experience; and experience, hope: 5 And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.
Also:
29 For unto you it is given in the behalf of Christ, not only to believe on him, but also to suffer for his sake;
So we are privileged to share in Christ’s sufferings, and we should glory in our sufferings, and that our sufferings are a gift from God Himself. We won't be able to do any of those things if we don’t accept by faith God’s purpose in them.
11 Now no chastening for the present seemeth to be joyous, but grievous: nevertheless afterward it yieldeth the peaceable fruit of righteousness unto them which are exercised thereby.
29 For whom he did foreknow, he also did predestinate to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brethren.
7 That in the ages to come he might shew the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus.
So we attempt to manage away pain in an unbiblical manner:
When we are no longer certain what to believe about God.
When we believe there is no other solution
When we fundamentally misunderstand what God is trying to accomplish in our lives
The question is not actually “how can I get God to do what I need him to do for me right now?” Rather, it is “how will God ultimately use this?”
What unbiblical ways are you using right now to deal with your pain? What excuses are you buying into to justify your sin? How are you attempting to bypass God’s working in your life?
Will you confess them before God today? To confess means to acknowledge them to God, to say the same thing about them that God does. Christian will you confess your sin, for God is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.
Will you determine to by faith trust God through the pain. Will you determine to do things God’s way and trust Him for the results. Will you allow God to use the pain in your life to accomplish His purposes?