Restoring Friendships

Introduction

Relationships can be tricky. Marriages, siblings, children, friendships, associations. If you have ever gotten to know any one for any length of time restoring one another for the sake of the relationship is very important. I believe we have moved on from various relationships even when we did not have to. Sometimes we can prematurely move on, without allows patience to have it’s perfect work. When it comes to friendships, they have attributes that are healthy to one’s life. Having a friend is a good thing, but having a friend that can give you healthy advice in your time of need is a gift a gift from God. Having a friend is a good thing but having a friend that is there in your time of need is a gift from God. We thank our friends but do we thank God for our friends. There is a difference, many times we can overlook God that has brought us the friend that we need in our time of need. Rebuilding relationships with the Luke’s of our life is not difficult, we know Luke will be there. It is the Mark’s of our life that we have a problem with. Paul is one of the coveted writers in New Testament history, Mark walked with Jesus, wrote from a personal point of view about our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and there was a point in time in which these two men could not get along. Relationships are restored in a number of ways but we have to remember that we must be thankful to God that those restorations happen otherwise we are missing the power of God and his hand in our relationships.

Background

Now Paul and his companions put out to sea from Paphos and came to Perga in Pamphylia; but John left them and returned to Jerusalem.

Mark also known as John Mark had deserted Paul and his companions. This is said to be the reasoning behind the fact that this dispute later on in this book had taken place. We see in After some days Paul said to Barnabas, “Let us return and visit the brethren in every city in which we proclaimed the word of the Lord, and see how they are.” Barnabas wanted to take John, called Mark, along with them also. But Paul kept insisting that they should not take him along who had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the work. And there occurred such a sharp disagreement that they separated from one another, and Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus. But Paul chose Silas and left, being committed by the brethren to the grace of the Lord. And he was traveling through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches.

36 After some days Paul said to Barnabas, “Let us return and visit the brethren in every city in which we proclaimed the word of the Lord, and see how they are.”

37 Barnabas wanted to take John, called Mark, along with them also.

38 But Paul kept insisting that they should not take him along who had deserted them in Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the work.

There relationship was damaged, two men working together to further the gospel were no longer going to work with each other. Think about the relationships or friendships you have had in the past that ended over a sharp disagreement. Often times those relationships are the ones we have no desire to rekindle because of how they ended.

39 And there occurred such a sharp disagreement that they separated from one another, and Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus.

40 But Paul chose Silas and left, being committed by the brethren to the grace of the Lord. And he was traveling through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches

These two men went in different directions, achieved many things for the cause of Christ nonetheless their relationship was damaged. We have to know how to bounce back from those types of things.

41 And he was traveling through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches

When Friends Desert You

It is hard enough to forgive someone when they do something that you say “I would have never done that to them”. Nevertheless Jesus has to be our baseline. When friends desert you, you still need to forgive them. Being deserted hurts, especially when you feel as if it is a time when you needed that friend or family member the most. See, the catalyst is when people desert us, we have to know that God will never us nor forgive us. Why do we expect imperfect people to have perfect attendance in our life.

Who do you depend on?

“I will never leave you nor forsake you”

When friends desert you, lean on the Lord. It is not the end of the world, it could mean that God is looking for you to depend on Him. Do not look at it as losing a friend but look at it as an opportunity to trust God even more. Look at it as an opportunity to forgive and exemplify Jesus in your life more than you ever have.

Do not take it personal, you cannot do anything about people not being by your side. Sometimes people are just observers in your life and not supporters. Observers may stand close to you to look at what is going on but never have any intention of helping you in your time of need. Job went through this very thing. "My relatives have failed, And my intimate friends have forgotten me. Mother and Father may leave, son and daughter may leave but God will never leave.

Observers watch, the 5000 Jesus fed watched him. Judas watched Jesus, Eliphaz watched Job. Some people are only observers. Disclaimer, do not take the observer for granted because they are watching you because they may need an example to change their life accordingly.

Youth, some of the biggest observers may even be the adults you hold in high regard that are not there we you need them the most. Adults we have to understand that the same youth we push to the side are watching our every move.

Let no man despise thy youth; but be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity.

Even if people are just observing, we are still held accountable to be an example to them.

We all need a Mark in Our Life

Luke alone is with me. Get Mark and bring him with you, for he is very useful to me for ministry. Luke is not the issue, we all have a Luke in our life, our relationship with Luke is not the issue. Sometimes we will use the loyalty of Luke as an excuse to refuse to forgive Mark. Sometimes it takes other folks and family to desert us for us to see that Mark is needed in our life.

Without cannot minister effectively, without cannot love properly. As long as I am holding on to the resentment of previous desertion my life will never be at peace. We have to stop pouting about trivial things and focus on reconciliation. Sometimes we have to let people know we need them and they are profitable to our life. As strong and as independent you may be, understand that companionship is something we all need. Sometimes life gets so tumultuous that Mark is the only one that can provide comfort in our life. Thank God for the Mark’s in life, sometimes we have to forgive and allow Mark to offer the support that only Mark can.

We have to stop holding on to the past desertion, and move toward rebuilding a healthy relationship. Our lives are way to short to hold on to things that no longer matter! Many of us are holding on to grudges with friends and siblings that we could have solved a long time ago.

Brothers and sisters in Christ are not talking, husbands and wives are not building healthy marriages at the expense of problems that ensued early in the relationship. Churches are not fellowshipping because we have become so comfortable with the loyalty of Luke that we forget to rebuild what we had with Mark.

Dear God, I pray that we can rebuild relationships and let go of resentment. Holding grudges will never be beneficial for us, refusing to forgive will never create a healthy church. If we are going to minister together we have to be willing to settle our differences and look to God to provide the health we need in our relationships. We have to ask God for the tools to sustain our rebuilding once we have made the choice to entreat that our Mark come back to our life. Who is your Mark this morning and what is getting in the way of you reconciling and rebuilding the relationship with Mark?

The Holy Bible: English Standard Version. (2016). (). Wheaton: Standard Bible Society.

New American Standard Bible: 1995 update. (1995). (). La Habra, CA: The Lockman Foundation.