Kingdom Living for the Family, Headship
Kingdom Living for the Family
Pastor E. Keith Hassell
Headship
Foundation Scripture: 1 Corinthians 11:3-16; Ephesians 5:22-33; John 17:6-19
I. The family is an extension of God’s kingdom order
A. Genesis 1:27-28 (NKJV) “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.’”
II. God’s Kingdom involves an order of headship
A. God is the head of Christ
B. Christ is the head of the husband
C. The husband is the head of the wife
III. Headship in the home is NOT
A. Superiority
B. Domination
C. Control
D. Abuse
IV. Headship means fulfilling the following roles:
A. Servant
1. Matthew 20:25-28 (NKJV) “But Jesus called them to Himself and said, ‘You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and those who are great exercise authority over them. Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.’”
2. John 13:3-5 (NKJV) “Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into His hands, and that He had come from God and was going to God, rose from supper and laid aside His garments, took a towel and girded Himself. After that, He poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet, and to wipe them with the towel with which He was girded.”
3. John 13:12-15 (NKJV) “So when He had washed their feet, taken His garments, and sat down again, He said to them, ‘Do you know what I have done to you? You call Me Teacher and Lord, and you say well, for so I am. If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you.’”
4. Ezekiel 34:1-2 (NKJV) “And the word of the Lord came to me, saying, ‘Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel, prophesy and say to them, “Thus says the Lord God to the shepherds: ‘Woe to the shepherds of Israel who feed themselves! Should not the shepherds feed the flocks?’”’”
B. Leader
1. Genesis 3:16 (NKJV) “To the woman He said: ‘I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children; your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you.’”
2. 1 Timothy 3:4-5 (NKJV) “one who rules his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence (for if a man does not know how to rule his own house, how will he take care of the church of God?);”
3. 1 Corinthians 11:1 (NKJV) “Imitate me, just as I also imitate Christ.”
a Headship involves leading by example
b Headship involves submission to Christ
C. Lover
1. Ephesians 5:25 (NKJV) “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her,”
2. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 (Amplified) “Love endures long and is patient and kind; love never is envious nor boils over with jealousy, is not boastful or vainglorious, does not display itself haughtily. It is not conceited (arrogant and inflated with pride); it is not rude (unmannerly) and does not act unbecomingly. Love (God’s love in us) does not insist on its own rights or its own way, for it is not self-seeking; it is not touchy or fretful or resentful; it takes no account of the evil done to it [it pays no attention to a suffered wrong].It does not rejoice at injustice and unrighteousness, but rejoices when right and truth prevail. Love bears up under anything and everything that comes, is ever ready to believe the best of every person, its hopes are fadeless under all circumstances, and it endures everything [without weakening]. Love never fails [never fades out or becomes obsolete or comes to an end].”
3. What is your wife’s love language?
D. Steward
1. Entrustment
a John 17:10 (NKJV) “And all Mine are Yours, and Yours are Mine, and I am glorified in them.”
2. Accountability
a Hebrews 13:17 (NKJV) “Obey those who rule over you, and be submissive, for they watch out for your souls, as those who must give account…”
3. Parable of the Faithful Steward
a Luke 12:42-48 (NKJV) “And the Lord said, ‘Who then is that faithful and wise steward, whom his master will make ruler over his household, to give them their portion of food in due season? Blessed is that servant whom his master will find so doing when he comes. Truly, I say to you that he will make him ruler over all that he has. But if that servant says in his heart, “My master is delaying his coming,” and begins to beat the male and female servants, and to eat and drink and be drunk, the master of that servant will come on a day when he is not looking for him, and at an hour when he is not aware, and will cut him in two and appoint him his portion with the unbelievers. And that servant who knew his master’s will, and did not prepare himself or do according to his will, shall be beaten with many stripes. But he who did not know, yet committed things deserving of stripes, shall be beaten with few. For everyone to whom much is given, from him much will be required; and to whom much has been committed, of him they will ask the more.’”
V. Principles of Headship from John 17
A. Manifesting the Father
1. John 17:6 “I have manifested Your name…”
2. Manifesting the Father’s name—His nature and character
B. Accepting his family as a gift from God
1. John 17:6 “to the men whom You gave Me out of the world. They were Yours, You gave then to Me.”
C. Bringing his family into obedience to God’s Word
1. John 17:6 “They have kept Your word”
D. Functioning by the wisdom and power of God
1. John 17:7 “Now they have known that all things You have given Me are from You.”
E. Giving his family words received from God
1. John 17:8 “For I have given them the words You have given Me.”
F. Leading his family into faith
1. John 17:8 “And they have received them.”
G. Praying for his family
1. John 17:9 “I pray for them. I do not pray for the world but for those whom You have given Me”
H. Acknowledging personal stewardship
1. John 17:9b-10a “for they are Yours. And all Mine are Yours and Yours Mine”
I. Being honored in them
1. John 17:10 ‘I am glorified in them”
J. Praying for their future without him
1. John 17:11 “Holy Father, keep them through Your name”
K. Preserving them in the faith
1. John 17:12 “Those whom You gave Me I have kept; and none of them is lost”
L. Maintaining family joy
1. John 17:13 “And these things I speak in the world that they may have My joy fulfilled in themselves”
2. Romans 14:17 The kingdom of God is…joy in the Holy Spirit
M. Separating them from the world
1. John 17:14 “They are not of this world, just as I am not of this world”
N. Praying that they might influence the world around them
1. John 17:15 “I do not pray that You should take them out of this world”
O. Praying that they be kept from the evil one
1. John 17:15 “But that You should keep them from the evil one”
2. Psalm 91:9-11 (NKJV) “Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge, even the Most High, your dwelling place, no evil shall befall you, nor shall any plague come near your dwelling; for He shall give His angels charge over you, to keep you in all your ways.”
P. Setting them apart unto God’s purpose
1. John 17:17 “Sanctify them by Your truth. Your word is truth”
2. Ephesians 5:25-27 (NKJV) “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish.”
Q. Sending them out in ministry
1. John 17:18 “As You have sent Me into the world, I also have sent them into the world”
R. Sanctifying himself
1. John 17:19 “And for their sakes I sanctify Myself”