"Relationship Status"

1 Corinthians 7:1–40 ESV

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another. To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion. To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife. To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife? Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches. Was anyone at the time of his call already circumcised? Let him not seek to remove the marks of circumcision. Was anyone at the time of his call uncircumcised? Let him not seek circumcision. For neither circumcision counts for anything nor uncircumcision, but keeping the commandments of God. Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called. Were you a bondservant when called? Do not be concerned about it. (But if you can gain your freedom, avail yourself of the opportunity.) For he who was called in the Lord as a bondservant is a freedman of the Lord. Likewise he who was free when called is a bondservant of Christ. You were bought with a price; do not become bondservants of men. So, brothers, in whatever condition each was called, there let him remain with God. Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy. I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned. Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that. This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away. I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord. If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better. A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.

Facebook relationship status - “in a relationship,” “single,” “it’s complicated.”

Apparently, the Corinthians had written Paul to ask about what new life in Jesus looked like SEXUALLY - is sex “bad” now? Is marriage not a good thing? We HAVE TO REMEMBER - the context of Corinth. Remember where they’re coming from! This is a highly sexualized society! This gospel stuff is RADICAL to them! Paul’s teaching is RADICAL!

No matter what my relationship status is, it is a unique BLESSING and OPPORTUNITY from God.

MARRIAGE is a unique blessing and opportunity from God.

Our society isn’t much different at all from Corinth! We live in a HIGHLY sexualized culture. Sex sells…sex entertains…fulfill your pleasures, feed the desire and move on!

Listen carefully - sexual drive is part of our creation - God designed it. God gave it to us, but Satan perverts it!

FIVE TIMES in this chapter, Paul addresses sexual temptation, sexual desire and how a person should marry if he is overcome by it so he may not sin.

1 Corinthians 7:9 ESV

But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

OUR MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIPS SHOULD BE A WITNESS TO A WORLD THAT SEEKS TO GRATIFY SEXUAL DESIRE.

Is Paul saying that the only reason you should get married is for sex? NO!!! What he’s saying is that God designed sex EXCLUSIVELY for the marriage relationship and ONLY in that context can it be enjoyed fully and we be satisfied the way God wired us to be!

Christian marriage should witness to the world that sex is a beautiful gift from God and can only be fully enjoyed in the marriage relationship between a man and a woman.

Christian marriage should also be a witness to EXCLUSIVE COMMITMENT & UNCONDITIONAL LOVE (AGAPE).

1 Corinthians 7:10–11 ESV

To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.

1 Corinthians 7:39 ESV

A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.

Christian marriage should also be a witness to SELFLESS SERVICE - husband and wife giving to each other…also serving each other through prayer & fasting.

Corinth - a patriarchal society of male dominance - needs and desires of women were rarely considered. This is radically progressive teaching!

STEPHEN UM QUOTE

As Christian spouses you should be seeking the Lord in how you can serve Him and His Kingdom TOGETHER!

The world should see Jesus!

Marriage to an UNBELIEVER is a unique blessing and opportunity from God.

Again, these new Corinthian Christians are trying to figure out the Christ-following life. Should we divorce our spouse who is still a pagan/unbeliever?

The Bible does make it clear - Jesus made it clear - that marrying an unbeliever is disobedience. But, let’s be honest - we sin. And, we also know that many people get saved AFTER marriage.

I know - not firsthand, but from experience — this is EXTREMELY hard and difficult to live through. Maybe you face ridicule, maybe you face disinterest, etc. You’re definitely not on the “same page.”

GOD HAS GIVEN YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE THE SINGLE GREATEST GOSPEL INFLUENCE IN YOUR UNBELIEVING SPOUSE’S LIFE.

Their salvation is the great “end” -

1 Corinthians 7:14 ESV

For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.

What if they leave? Listen to me - fight for your marriage, seek unity, seek to be Christlike, but you can’t control the other person...

1 Corinthians 7:15 ESV

But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.

What is your unique calling/opportunity?

GOD HAS GIVEN YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE THE SINGLE GREATEST GOSPEL INFLUENCE IN YOUR UNBELIEVING SPOUSE’S LIFE.

The Message of 1 Corinthians 3. Marriage and Divorce (7:10–16)

A Cape Town brain surgeon put it most movingly. When asked what he found so difficult about his wife’s new-found faith in Christ, he stressed two things: first, she was no longer the person with whom he had originally fallen in love and whom he had decided to marry; secondly, there was another Man about the house, to whom she was all the time referring her every decision and whom she chose to consult for his advice and instructions. He was no longer the boss in his own house: Jesus gave the orders and set the pace.

PRAY - DON’T PUSH // SERVE - DON’T NAG

SURROUND YOURSELF WITH YOUR CHURCH FAMILY!!!!

SINGLENESS is a unique blessing and opportunity from God.

Is Paul saying that if you’re single, you shouldn’t get married? NO! God created and designed marriage. It is a beautiful and gracious gift from Him to us. What Paul is saying is, “Don’t be consumed with the idea and/or pursuit of marriage.”

I’ve met single people who are just obsessed with getting married…girls in seminary - MRS degree. Listen, those of you today who may be single - unmarried, divorced, widowed…you have a unique blessing and opportunity from God!

God has got you, right now, in a season of life when you can be more focused on your relationship with Him and serving Him and His kingdom in ways that you might not be able to do when you’re married!

Vs. 32-35…MY PERSONAL REGRETS - not getting married but how I spent my time as a single person.

At 15, 16, 17, 18 - YOU DON’T KNOW WHO YOU’RE GOING TO MARRY! Listen to me carefully - don’t rush to date. Don’t rush to find a mate. Don’t waste your present on someone who won’t be in your future.

Time isn’t your enemy! If God’s desire and will for your life is for you to get married/remarried, HE will send that person into your life. Don’t rush it and DEFINITELY don’t settle!

God’s #1 goal for your life is not for you to get married - it is to be obediently serving Him and growing in Christlikeness!

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