Husbands Love Your Wives - the Home

Introduction

Good morning, blessed to see my brothers and sisters here in worship this morning.

This is a joyful day? why?

Because we are together!

We have come to worship the Lord our God!

There is nothing better in all the world to do today..... would you agree?

YES! Without a doubt this is where we need to be today!

Now last week I began talking about the home.

The homes is more than a structure, it is the place where people unite their hearts, where marriages and families grow… and the home without a doubt is important.

How do I know this?

Because the devil will stop at nothing to destroy it.... The devil knows if he can divide a home, if he can get his foot in the door, well he can wreck it.

Now last week we examined just two thoughts.....

A. The origin of the home is the Lord himself.

God who is our benevolent Creator, the one who loves us, cares about our relationships. He saw that Adam was alone, and brought him a helpmate, a blessing, He gave Adam a wife.

So the first union of marriage came about as the Lord God gave Adam a wife, Eve.

And the first union was made that day. The first home began and it continues to today.

and as God united the

But how can the home survive?

B. Jesus must be Lord over the home! He must build it!

Do you remember our key verse from last week?4

Psalm 127:1 ESV

1 Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Unless the Lord watches over the city, the watchman stays awake in vain.

The home can only survive, can only endure the storms of life it the Lord builds it.

Doing any things else, trying to build the home on anything else and it will fail. God said himself--- their labor will be in vain.

Do you want your home to stand.... allow Jesus to build it!

Now.... we’ve refreshed the old memory banks a bit… let’s move forward-

Lets discuss the people in the home....

Husbands! Lets talk about you and your role in the family!

So this morning lets look at Ephesians chapter 5

Ephesians 5:25–31 ESV

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

What a great passage the Lord has given to us who are husbands....

So what can we learn men from these verse that will assist us in being the men God has called us to be, and the husbands are lives long for and our children are blessed by.....

A Little Background

Now the time of this writing is about 62 AD, from everything we can tell, Paul is under this first imprisonment in Rome.

Ephesus hosted what was called the 7th wonder of the world in its day, the temple to Artemis.

Artemis was a Greek goddess supposedly a daughter of Zeus . So there was a lot of people coming to the temple to worship. And the city was such a diverse place that The Greek historian Strabo called Ephesus the greatest emporium in the province of Asia Minor.

So you see a world pulled in many directions, false religions, Roman culture prevailed and there was a pull at how men and women were to live and act in this culture.

But Paul reminds the church not to give in and not to fall to the ways of the world. The home was dependent on godly men and women who dedicated to the home and Christ being the center of the home.

So lets begin....

The Home Needs Men who have Christ in the center of their lives and who Love their Wives...... so there is a command from Scripture for us to recognize....

1. Husbands Love Your Wives....

There is a command for us to follow… Now some of you here today might say… Preacher, I’ve got that covered! I love my wife?

My response to you is this.... Ok, Great!

But do you love here like the Scriptures command us to love our wives?

Look back at verse 25 with me..

Ephesians 5:25 ESV

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,

Man, this is a powerful verse with great expectations tied to it....

You see as a husband I am (You are) commanded to love our wives, No doubt about it.

Paul says Husbands, love… the word love there is a verb, and its tense int he Greek is what we call "present active imperative…” So what’s it mean… right now, you must love. She if your wife. God gave her to you, she blesses you each day… her presence is captivating,

Song of Solomon 4:9 ESV

9 You have captivated my heart, my sister, my bride; you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes, with one jewel of your necklace.

Husbands with each moment you are commanded to “love” your bride! And never stop loving her.

Wives here today, punch your husbands in the shoulder and remind him how blessed he is to have you!

But now… consider the meaning of the word “love” here in this verse… It is more than a fondness for your wife, it is m a caring attitude, you want the best for her and but this word is not implying a sexual desire as love...

But consider the word “love” here in this verse… It is more than a fondness for your wife, a caring attitude or the physical or emotional attraction ...

How do I know...

The word love here isn’t “eros” where we get our word erotic, highly sexual type of love.... Now the word here in the Greek is “Agape”.

It is a godly type of love. In fact it has God and his loving attitude toward us at the very core of its meaning. You see it is a love that lays aside, forfeits all of its rights and privileges, it does so to bless the other person. To help the other person...

It is the love Jesus has for us....

John 10:17 ESV

17 For this reason the Father loves me, because I lay down my life that I may take it up again.

we see how much he loved those around him, he had an “agape” love for Mary, Martha and Lazarus

John 11:5 ESV

5 Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.

And is it the sacrifice love that is talking Jesus to the cross....

John 15:9 ESV

9 As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Abide in my love.

Paul says we are to love our wives with that type of love, a godly love, but listen Paul is not done, Paul says “kick it up a notch.”

Go back to verse 25.... in Ephesians 5.,

“Husbands love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her..."verse 25

Man, do you see it. husbands you are to model love, reflect love to your spouse in the same way Christ loved the church. It is a Christ like spirit in your love, a sacrificial, a laying down of my life type of love.”

Now do you remember what I said an “agape” type love is?

And “Agape” love is a love that lays aside “me”, my rights and privileges, I forfeit it all for her.

reminds us that Christ lay aside ALL for the sake of the church. Jesus left the splendor of heaven, allowed himself to be made in the fashion of a man, yet without sin. He came to us, he loves us so much that he became obedient to death, even death on the cross.

Jesus did all this to ransom us from sin. He gave up his life that we might have life. But thanks be to God.... no one takes His life, He laid it down for us and the Father has given him the power to pick up up again.

He now sits at the right hand side of God waiting for the word, to not only give us life, but to pick us up

Man that is love.

Why, to ransom us from sin. we are to love our wives with a sacrificial,

Husbands lay aside all for your wife. Love her with a godly type of love first!

You want your wife to know you love her, don't just buy her flowers, or chocolate or something sparkly… all those are nice.

Die to self, put her first and let her know she is truly more important than “you” .....to her, you place her right under Jesus.

That is the love we are to have for our wives....

Love her as Jesus loved the church!

It cant get any better than that..... wow!

Men can you do that.... here is the secret if Jesus is the center of your heart you can..... I’m telling you! You can with Jesus. Be the man your wife desires, love her with an agape love!

I almost feel like Rick Flair, what to give a shout to the Lord, a woooo.

Now lets move on to a second thought today....

2. Remember Who She Is.... and Who She Represents...

Now lets dive deep right here....

Husbands you are commanded to love your wives as Christ loved the Church

So the wife is a symbolic representation of the church, and in the same way men are to love their wives as Jesus loved the Church.

So lets look back at the text see what is being said....

Ephesians 5:25–27 ESV

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.

Ephesians

Now think back what did Jesus did for us...... He died on a cross, was crucified under the hand of Pontius Pilate. His death was an atoning sacrifice for sin.

His death, the shedding of blood satisfied the law, paid the penalty of sin, our sin, the sin of the whole world - past, present and future. Jesus died for us..

We ( the church who is also called the bride), we have been cleansed from our sin. when the church stands before God, all that God sees is Jesus because they have been covered by the blood. Jesus who is both Lord and groom has presented His wife as spotless before God.

We have been cleansed from our sin. when the church stands before God, all that God sees is Jesus because they have been covered by the blood.

Man, Jesus has done so much for us....

Isaiah 53:5 ESV

5 But he was pierced for our transgressions; he was crushed for our iniquities; upon him was the chastisement that brought us peace, and with his wounds we are healed.

Isaiah 55:2 ESV

2 Why do you spend your money for that which is not bread, and your labor for that which does not satisfy? Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good, and delight yourselves in rich food.

Jesus did all this for us...

Husbands, you have work to do....

Men you are to give to her.... let me explain

Now, men, we do not do the work of Salvation in our wives lfe, Jesus is the only one capable of such. But we can help make our wives radiant, uplifted and blessed by our attitude to her.

We are to bless her, encourage her, help her find and fulfill her calling before the Lord so that she is a fragrant blessing to the Lord and the people God has placed around her.

So often a husband dominates his wife, he doesn’t support her or believe she is able and as such she believes it as well.

Help her serve the Lord and be a blessing to others so that verse 27 is fulfilled in her life

Ephesians 5:27 ESV

27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.

Men your wives are holy creations of God, they have a calling, a purpose in life. Help them fan into flame their spiritual lives...

And just one last thought today....

3. Men Loves Your Wives Better than Yourselves....

Without a doubt God made sure that Paul communicated just how much love a man is supposed to have for his wife....

We are to love her, help her and bless her in such a way

I think the push is there to remind us that there is no room for a selfish person in the home, in a marriage or the kingdom of God.

God instructs the husband, love her like you love your own body, or own flesh.

That is a powerful thought, and it contradicts the teaching of the world that promotes self love, taking care of self, you know there is on one better that numero uno. You are number one.

But its not true… lets look back at the text and see what Paul tells us ....

Ephesians 5:28–29 ESV

28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,

Ephesians 5

There is a pull in the natural man, in the flesh to just do for self. But that is un-natural in the kingdom of God.

Why? Jesus demonstrated it when He put the needs of the world ahead of his own life, thus dying on a cross for our sin.

In comparison, men of God are to have a love, an ( agape) love for their bride. This love is greater than the love of their own lives, their own flesh.

You want for the other more than you want for yourself....

As a husband I always want Marci to be blessed above me… I want her to have the last piece of pie....

Why?

Verse 29-31

Ephesians 5:29 ESV

29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church,

Ephesians 5:29–31 ESV

29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”

Men you are to act and reflect exactly what you received from the Lord. As Jesus has nourished and cherished the wife his bride, you are to do the same to her

Verse 31 reminds us that a man and woman become one flesh.

The Lord gives to Paul the very same statement from the first wedding in

One flesh speaks to the truth that we ( man and women) have come together has one. A home under the Lordship of Jesus Christ.

Genesis 2:24 ESV

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

As members of this one body, this home if you will we desire the very best for the other.

Men, God has placed a great responsibility in your life. Those who are married are to love their wives better, with a pure heart above themselves for the glory of God.

But men who are not married, perhaps a widower. You can reflect that love to others, demonstrate to them the love of God by your actions

Men love as Christ loved the World…

It is possible but it begins today with a surrendered heart.

Men, is your heart pure today

Men, is your heart free to love her and others like Christ loved the church.

Men, if not come, open your heart to Jesus and ask Him to help you love like Jesus loves us.

That is a high calling....

Now