The Big Little Books of Truth and Love - Part 7
I wrote something to the church; but Diotrephes, who loves to be first among them, does not accept what we say. For this reason, if I come, I will call attention to his deeds which he does, unjustly accusing us with wicked words; and not satisfied with this, he himself does not receive the brethren, either, and he forbids those who desire to do so and puts them out of the church. 3 John 9-10 (NASB95)
Intro: In our series we’ve been looking at a man the Apostle John thought much of, a man named Gaius. Gaius, as we’ve seen already, was a model Christian.
He was spiritually fit because he lived within the balance of truth and love. He had a good testimony because he lived within the balance of truth and love. And he was a man involved in practical ministry because he lived within the balance of truth and love.
He was a study of truth and loved lived out in balance. The second man mentioned in 3 John is the opposite, a study of truth and love absent. John wrote to Gaius…
I wrote something to the church; but Diotrephes, who loves to be first among them, does not accept what we say. For this reason, if I come, I will call attention to his deeds which he does... 3 John 9-10a (NASB95)
John penned a letter of instruction or exhortation to the church (most likely the church which Gaius belonged to and possibly met in his house) but a leader, maybe an elder, named Diotrephes rejected it.
From the few words of this verse we learn much about this man:
It says he loved to be first among the church. This reminds me of the Pharisees.
Then Jesus spoke to the crowds and to His disciples, saying: “The scribes and the Pharisees have seated themselves in the chair of Moses; therefore all that they tell you, do and observe, but do not do according to their deeds; for they say things and do not do them. … they do all their deeds to be noticed by men; for they broaden their phylacteries and lengthen the tassels of their garments. They love the place of honor at banquets and the chief seats in the synagogues, and respectful greetings in the market places, and being called Rabbi by men… But the greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted.” Matthew 23:1-12 (NASB95)
They loved to be first among the Jews. They wanted recognition, no, they craved it. And they longed for authority. They wanted to set the rules but not necessarily have to live by them. That’s why the sparks flew when they rubbed shoulders with Jesus!
In the same way, Diotrephes lusted after recognition and authority in the church – a classic symptom of a life out of balance – and this lust put him at odds with John the Elder. He didn’t accept what John said because it was a threat to his authority.
Diotrephes selfishly tried to hold on to authority and recognition in the church by…
I. Spreading rumors about those threatening his authority
… unjustly accusing us with wicked words… 3 John 10b (NASB95)
John MacArthur comments: “[unjustly accusing] comes from a word meaning “to bubble up” and has the idea of useless, empty jabber, i.e., talking nonsense. The charges against John were completely unjustified…”[1] Not only was he talking nonsense about John, he was malicious about it. His words were wicked, intended to do John harm.
There’s an old saying that a lie travels halfway around the world before the truth even gets its boots on. For some reason folks are inclined to believe a lie before they’ll accept the truth. I try to be careful when I hear gossip about other churches and especially other pastors. Folks, a half-truth is still a lie. That’s probably what Diotrephes was doing. Maliciously telling half truths about John to gain support.
I have a friend who, last I heard, is no longer in the ministry. He pastored a church in east TN and they had a Diotrophes, three of them actually. They wanted him out of there so they started spreading rumors about him. In one deacons’ meeting they produced “proof” of the pastor’s unfitness for ministry. They had a police report showing there had been 13 domestic related calls to the pastor’s home in the past three months. Bad weather had set of his security alarm thirteen times and they are recorded at the police department as domestic calls. That’s the kind of stuff Diotrephes was doing.
Paul gave special instructions to Timothy about making accusations…
Do not receive an accusation against an elder except on the basis of two or three witnesses. 1 Timothy 5:19 (NASB95)
I think would be a good way to handle accusations about anyone!
So the first thing our case study in a life lived out of balance did was spread rumors. The second thing he did to hold on to authority was…
II. Rejecting those who have authority
… and not satisfied with this, he himself does not receive the brethren, either... 3 John 10 (NASB95)
This means that Diotrephes refused to show hospitality to certain traveling ministers because they associated with John. This is exactly the opposite attitude of Gaius. If Diotrephes had accepted them he would have had to accept the authority of John.
I try to be careful to respect those worthy of respect. There are those I know by their witness, fruit, and way of life that are to be listened to and deferred to. The writer of Hebrews reminds us that God puts spiritual authorities in our lives and we are to submit to them…
Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they keep watch over your souls as those who will give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with grief, for this would be unprofitable for you. Hebrews 13:17 (NASB95)
John wasn't just any church leader; John the Elder was an overseer of the churches in Asia Minor, which would have included the seven churches of Revelation. He traveled from church to church as he was able to appoint pastors, teach the Scriptures, settle disputes, and lovingly guide his “children” as he loved to call them into truth.
Listen to the resume of John…
q One of the twelve disciples chosen by Christ
q One of the three disciples given special attention
q The only disciple referred to as the “one whom Jesus loved”
q The only disciple singled out to remain until He came back
q He spent three years at the feet of Jesus, saw every miracle, heard every word, touched him, saw him crucified, saw the empty tomb, saw the risen Lord and saw the Lord rise
q He was there when the tongues of fire rested upon them in the upper room
q He was there when Peter preached his first message and saw the church grow
q He was the author of a gospel and three NT letters
q He would become the author of the last and most mysterious book of the Bible
John was not perfect and he was not divine but he was a spiritual authority and it was this authority Diotrephes went up against.
We should be careful to acknowledge the authorities God places in our lives.
The last thing Diotrephes did to hold onto his authority was…
III. Bullying those who accept authority
… and he forbids those who desire to do so and puts them out of the church. 3 John 10 (NASB95)
Now this evidence that our man is totally out of control. He was forbidding anyone in the church to show hospitality to ministers associating with John. And he even threw them out of the church. Church discipline is biblical and much too absent in the church today, but Diotrephes had no right to take on a responsibility left to the congregation.
He was acting like a dictator, and according to the dictionary a dictator is “an absolute ruler, a tyrant.”
Listen to the words of a well-known pastor
Church “dictators” are dangerous people but, fortunately, they are easy to recognize. They like to talk about themselves and what they have “done for the Lord.” They also have the habit of judging and condemning those who disagree with them. They are experts in putting labels on other Christians and classifying them into neat little categories of their own intention. They base their fellowship on personalities, not the doctrines that are fundamental to the faith. The tragedy is that these “dictators” actually believe that they are serving God and glorifying Jesus Christ.
It has been my experience that most of the distress and division in local churches, and between churches, has resulted from personalities more than anything else. If only we would return to the New Testament principle of making the person and work of Jesus Christ our test for fellowship, rather than associations and interpretations of nonessential doctrines. But people like Diotrephes will always have their enthusiastic followers because many sincere but immature and untaught believers prefer to follow such leaders.[2]
I would add that for some reason folks in typical churches think its spiritual to tolerate intolerable behavior from its members. There are men and women like Diotrephes in churches all over the place because folks allow them to be leaders even though they are not living in the balance of truth and love. I have seen this played out in business meetings, in families leaving the church, in churches splitting.
What do you do about a Diotrephes? Exactly what John said he was going to do: call attention to the deeds he or she does.
Conclusion : The spirit of old Diotrephes is still around. Some years ago AT Robertson wrote an article on Diotrephes for a denominational paper. The editor told him that twenty-five deacons stopped the paper to show their resentment against being personally attacked in the paper.[3]
This spirit can rise up in anyone if they are not careful. It can happen to deacons, teachers, pastors, and anyone else in leadership. We must guard ourselves against it.
Have you been hurt by a Diotrephes? Please don’t judge Christ or His church.
The question this week is the same as last week:
Are you living in the balance of truth and love?
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[1] MacArthur, John Jr. The MacArthur Study Bible. electronic ed., 3 Jn 10. Nashville: Word Pub., 1997, c1997.
[2] Wiersbe, Warren W. The Bible Exposition Commentary. "An exposition of the New Testament comprising the entire 'BE' series"--Jkt., 3 Jn 9. Wheaton, Ill.: Victor Books, 1996, c1989.
[3] A.T. Robertson, Word Pictures in the New Testament, Vol.V c1932, Vol.VI c1933 by Sunday School Board of the Southern Baptist Convention. (Oak Harbor: Logos Research Systems, 1997), 3 Jn 9.