Promises promises
Promises, Promises
Matthew 5:33-37
1. INTRO: New Year’s Resolutions
ØWhat were your resolutions?
ØDid you keep last year’s?
ØPromises, promises… talk is cheap
ØToday we are going to be talking about promises, and being people of our word.
Ø Think of 2 people you know that are least likely to lie or deceive you. Ok, if both of the people you were thinking of were under 30, stand up.
Ø Younger generations usually consider themselves less likely to keep their word.
Ø We will have better relationships with God others and ourselves if we apply what we learn today about keeping our word.
2. Scripture, Matthew 5:33-37
Ø (Today’s sermon draws from an email with ideas for use on New Year’s Day.)
Ø The Pharisees had developed elaborate rules for when one was bound by his word and when he wasn’t. Any promise made using God’s name was binding, but if one avoids using God’s name he’s not bound, they thought.
Ø In fact a whole book of their law-code dealt with making vows and promises – which ones you had to keep, and which ones you didn’t.
Ø Some think this passage means Christians cannot take oaths in courts or anywhere else. However, the Old Testament records that Abraham, Issac, Jacob, Joseph and Jonathan all took oaths; and Jesus swore an oath in His trial.
Ø God did too: Hebrews 6:13-14 (screen)
Ø Deut 23:21-23. (screen)
Ø I am convinced God is teaching us to avoid the need to swear by always speaking the plain truth.
3. Lying
Ø Why don’t politicians always tell the truth?
Ø Do people hear us the way they hear politicians?
Ø Dishonesty destroys trust.
Ø It is in God’s to be always truthful, while lying is Satan’s native language. (screen)
Ø Who do we want to imitate?
Ø If you have a relationship with someone who is not very truthful, how does that impact the relationship?
Ø Our relationships will be better if we are more truthful.
4. Keeping Your Word
Ø “I promise.” I love to kid my kids, but I want them to know that I don’t lie. They need to be sure. Is what I am doing wrong? I don’t think so. It is not that I often lie, and need to swear to have any chance of being believed. It is my kidding with a straight face that can breed confusion.
Ø My kids know that I am either telling the truth or kidding… kind of…
Ø Do what you say you will do. Incremental loss of integrity. Me and my weekly time with my kids. I have to fix this.
Ø Why don’t lawyers always tell the plain truth?
Ø When we speak, do people hear us the way they hear lawyers?
Ø There are many things we do like this, unfortunately: we exaggerate, we mislead, we give false flattery, or we deceive.
Ø When you speak, can people trust that you are telling the truth?
Ø Our word should not be conditional or negotiable. Sometimes it is impossible. Two promises conflict, and we must simply do the best we can and be straight forward with our apologies.
Ø However, in most cases we need to follow through, even when it is hard to keep our promises. For example:
· Marriage.
· Promises to ourselves about changes (diet, exercise, etc.)
· Promises to Jesus about time spent with him and his body.
Ø What do we do when keeping our word will keep us from what we want in the moment? That is the test of our integrity in this area.
Ø If you have a relationship with someone who doesn’t exactly lie, but whose word can’t be counted on, how does that impact the relationship?
Ø Our relationships will be better if others know that our word is truly our bond, even when it may not be easy.
Ø Our relationship with God and ourselves will be better when we exchange shame for integrity.
5. Learning to Keep Your Word
Ø How can we get better?
· Admit we struggle, and then pray & discuss.
· Monitor our promises. Think about what we say in our personal, spiritual and business lives.
· Examine the nature of our temptation to lie or fail to fulfill our promises. Is it laziness, popularity, over-promising, greed, etc.?