What To Do When You're Depressed

Psalms To Warm Your Heart  •  Sermon  •  Submitted
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Spiritual depression is real, it's common, and it hurts. Here are the steps we can take to lift our hearts out of the pit.

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Psalm 42:1–2 ESV
As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God?
Psalm 42 ESV
To the choirmaster. A Maskil of the Sons of Korah. As a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God. When shall I come and appear before God? My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all the day long, “Where is your God?” These things I remember, as I pour out my soul: how I would go with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God with glad shouts and songs of praise, a multitude keeping festival. Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God. My soul is cast down within me; therefore I remember you from the land of Jordan and of Hermon, from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep at the roar of your waterfalls; all your breakers and your waves have gone over me. By day the Lord commands his steadfast love, and at night his song is with me, a prayer to the God of my life. I say to God, my rock: “Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?” As with a deadly wound in my bones, my adversaries taunt me, while they say to me all the day long, “Where is your God?” Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation and my God.
Psalm 42:3–5 ESV
My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all the day long, “Where is your God?” These things I remember, as I pour out my soul: how I would go with the throng and lead them in procession to the house of God with glad shouts and songs of praise, a multitude keeping festival. Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation
Psalm 42:6–7 NASB95
O my God, my soul is in despair within me; Therefore I remember You from the land of the Jordan And the peaks of Hermon, from Mount Mizar. Deep calls to deep at the sound of Your waterfalls; All Your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me.

Psalm 42

What To Do When You’re Depressed

We’re starting a new series for the next 5 weeks entitled “Psalms to Warm Your Heart”. It’s getting cold outside. I’m from Texas. I don’t like the cold very much, although my wife Jen is from the north and she claims she’s going to turn into a popsicle if it gets below 25. So I’m not sure how that works.
But not only is it getting cold outside, sometimes things can get cold in our spiritual lives as well. The temperature sort of drops in our walk with God.
It could be a specific, traumatic event that happened, or maybe you’ve been persecuted for your faith, maybe you have no idea why you feel depressed… you just do.
Maybe something happens that rocks your faith. Maybe you are being persecuted or made fun of for following Jesus and it hurts. Maybe you’ve just slowly been drifting away. Maybe there’s some sin in your life you haven’t addressed. Or maybe there is no cause - you just wake up depressed, and you can’t get out of it.
Whatever it is, you are spiritually down in the dumps. God seems far off. He’s not “picking up the phone” when you call.
Anyone know what I’m talking about?
Spiritual depression is real. It’s common. And it hurts.
Some Causes of Spiritual Depression
Physical
A traumatic Event
Unconfessed Sin (secrets)
A slow drift from God & community
Persecution
Physical
Clinical depression, anxiety are real! 25% of Canadians will meet the criteria for clinical depression in their lifetime.
The good news? God’s Word has answers for this, too. You may need to go to counselling or see a doctor, or maybe you don’t. But it’s OK if you do.
A traumatic event
Oftentimes, traumatic events can send us reeling. Just ask Job. He lost everything in the span of a few days. It’s OK to be upset about a traumatic event - but Job shows us how to be upset.
In all this, Job did not sin by charging God with wrongdoing” -
Unconfessed sin (secrets)
New study: Avg person is holding onto 13 secrets, 5 of which they’ve never told anyone!
When participants were asked to judge the slope of a hill or the length of a distance, those who were preoccupied with keeping secrets judged the hills as steeper and the distances longer than they really were
When participants were asked to judge the slope of a hill or the length of a distance, those who were preoccupied with keeping secrets judged the hills as steeper and the distances longer than they really were
When I kept silent, my bones wasted away… I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity… and You forgave the iniquity of my sin” - ,
A slow drift from God & community
This one seems obvious on the surface, but it’s the most common culprit. If you don’t spend time with God & God’s people, you’ll feel far from God.
Which will result in spiritual depression.
Persecution
This was a common cause for David in the psalms. Saul hunted him on numerous occasions, his son Absolom hunted and tried to kill him… people hated him because he was “a man after God’s own heart”.
Being made fun of for our faith or rejected can be extremely discouraging, and can cause us to wonder why God doesn’t step in at times...
Maybe something happens that rocks your faith. Maybe you are being persecuted or made fun of for following Jesus and it hurts. Maybe you’ve just slowly been drifting away. Maybe there’s some sin in your life you haven’t addressed. Or maybe there is no cause - you just wake up depressed, and you can’t get out of it.
The Effects of Depression : Depression Wreaks Havoc
A loathing of life and a desire to end it
Loneliness - surrounded by people, but we still fill alone (“nobody understands what I’m going through”)
Distance from God/Inability to “hear God speak”
Frustration with prayer & Scripture reading
Doubt & Fear - questioning our faith, fearing judgment
Fear
Self-loathing & selfishness (“woe is me” attitude)
For those that don’t know, I’ve struggled with depression my entire adult life. There are days where I wake up and I simply don’t feel good. At all. And I can’t seem to get out of it no matter how many people try to cheer me up. It is well known that Charles Spurgeon, probably the best preacher who ever lived, battled severe, chronic depression. He once said:
“My spirits were sunken so low that I could weep by the hour like a child, and yet I knew not what I wept for… This shapeless, undefinable, yet all-beclouding hopelessness cannot be reasoned with.”
“My spirits were sunken so low that I could weep by the hour like a child, and yet I knew not what I wept for… This shapeless, undefinable, yet all-beclouding hopelessness cannot be reasoned with.”
The Sons of Korah, the authors of this psalm, were godly men who loved the Lord. Yet it’s clear that spiritual depression was a very real part of their experience in life.
Psalm 42:3 ESV
My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all the day long, “Where is your God?”
Psalm 42:3 NASB95
My tears have been my food day and night, While they say to me all day long, “Where is your God?”
Psalm 42:9 ESV
I say to God, my rock: “Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?”
, 9
“My tears have been my food day and night, while they say to me all the day long, ‘Where is your God?’”
“I say to God, my rock: Why have you forgotten me? Why do I go mourning because of the oppression of the enemy?”
It’ good to know that spiritual depression doesn’t disqualify us from being godly men & women, isn’t it?
While it can be encouraging to know we aren’t alone in this depression - in fact, one of the ways depression can attack us is feeding us the lie that “you are the only person who is like this” (which isn’t true) - while it’s encouraging, it’s not enough. We don’t want to stay depressed, and we aren’t meant to.
The Psalmist in might appear week in his faith here, but this is actually an incredible example of strength from someone enduring real spiritual depression & suffering.

The Effects of Depression

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I see 6 things that he does in this psalm that we can do, too, when we are in the midst of spiritual depression. So lets get to it…

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A loathing of life and a desire to end it
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Loneliness

Pray Honestly To God

Distance from God
Explanation
Doubt
In verses 2, 3 & 9, the psalmist lays out his complaint before God. He gets honest, and he prays.
Fear
Verse 2 - “When?” --- When will this end?
Verse 3 - “Where?” - Where is God?
Verse 9 - “Why?” - Why hasn’t God ended this yet?
Though he asks God “Why have you forgotten me”, it’s clear he doesn’t actually believe God has forgotten him. Just look at verse 8!
But it feels like God has forgotten him.
he’s fighting to believe God’s promises, because the circumstances around him all scream, “God isn’t there”. Can anyone relate?
I find today that most people trust their feelings more than they trust God
If I feel like God is punishing me, it must be true. If it feels like God doesn’t care about me, it must be true. That’s not what the psalmist did here.
Sometimes in life, we have to do things we don’t feel like doing. And sometimes that’s the only way up from the stubborn darkness.
Feelings don’t define faith. Instead, faith is simply turning to the Lord” - Ed Welch, Pastor, Author, Christian counsellor
God said of the Israelites in , “They do not cry to me from their heart, but they wail upon their beds”.
God told the Israelites in
Hosea 7:14 ESV
They do not cry to me from the heart, but they wail upon their beds; for grain and wine they gash themselves; they rebel against me.
Rather than seeing their situation as an opportunity to draw closer to God, they wailed upon their beds in self-pity!
But God doesn’t operate on our timetable.
Isaiah 55:8 ESV
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
b.
We want God to cancel out our enemies right now. We want Him to take away our depression right now. And if He doesn’t, we’re tempted to question whether He is good or whether He is even there.
But when we think like this, it betrays a small view of a small god.
We hardly consider that God may have purposes in our suffering that we are not big enough to see.
It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” -
If you are a parent, I’m sure you know the feeling when your child gets angry with you because you won’t let her have or do something she wants. The child believes this thing will be good, but as the parent you know it will not. You don’t withhold because you are unloving. You withhold precisely because you love.
Why is it so hard to believe that God does the exact same thing?
Imagine with me: What if God is much bigger & wiser than you’ve ever believed? What if God sees ten thousand things you can’t see?
Imagine with me for a moment. What if God is way bigger and way wiser than you’ve ever imagined? What if He knows more than you do?
The first step out of the darkness is to cry out to God when you don’t feel like crying out to God.
What if God actually does have a specific plan for this difficult time?
Feelings don’t define faith. Instead, faith is simply turning to the Lord” - Ed Welch, Pastor, Author, Christian counsellor
Because I guarantee you, one of the purposes of God in allowing suffering in our lives is to draw us closer to Him.
to decrease our reliance on self & increase our reliance on Him
God wants to hear from you, and He wants you to hear Him.
God wants to hear from you, and He wants you to hear Him.
Psalm 50:15 NLT
Then call on me when you are in trouble, and I will rescue you, and you will give me glory.”
Turn to the psalms. Let the psalms give you the words to say, and listen to God, who speaks through His Word in the psalms

Rest in God’s Sovereignty

Explanation
“Deep calls to deep” = two waterfalls crashing. “Breakers & waves” = violent storm at sea.
Notice something in verse 7… “YOUR breakers and YOUR waves”. These circumstances causing this depression are not just allowed by God - they are caused by God... How does that sit with you?
It may be one of the hardest truths about God to grasp. Think with me for a moment here…
What most of us want to believe is that God has nothing to do with our depression or suffering. But what would that say about God? Well, it would say that He either does not care, or that He doesn’t have the power to stop it.
Let me put it this way: What is more comforting? A storm sent & controlled by God, or a storm that God did not send & is out of control?
"God is over all things, and nothing happens apart from his knowledge and will. By the time suffering or depression comes to our doorstep, God did it. To believe anything else is to opt for a universe that is random and out of control, without a guiding hand bringing all things to a purposeful and awe-inspiring conclusion." - Ed Welch
The universe is not random & out of control, and neither are the events in your life.
Why would God send difficulties & sufferings into our lives?
I’ve come to see over time that God has allowed depression to remain a reality in my life to discipline me & to keep me close to Him.
Hebrews 12:7 ESV
It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?
“It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” -
If you are a parent, I’m sure you know the feeling when your child gets angry with you because you won’t let her have or do something she wants. The child believes this thing will be good, but as the parent you know it will not. You don’t withhold because you are unloving. You withhold precisely because you love.
Why is it so hard to believe that God does the exact same thing?
Imagine with me: What if God is much bigger & wiser than you’ve ever believed? What if God sees ten thousand things you can’t see?
Isaiah 55:8 ESV
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord.
, the disciples were crossing the sea while Jesus was asleep in the bottom of the boat, and a fierce storm arose & the boat was filling with water.
“Lord, don’t you care that we are going to drown??!!”
Is that not how we feel sometimes? “Don’t You care, God?!”
Mark 4:39–40 NLT
When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm. Then he asked them, “Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?”
Jesus woke up, rebuked the wind
Listen to me: Don’t disconnect verse 7 with verse 8! God’s love is a sovereign love. Day and night it is steadfast. Through the storms, it is steadfast.
“It is for discipline that you have to endure. God is treating you as sons. For what son is there whom his father does not discipline?” -
If you are a parent, I’m sure you know the feeling when your child gets angry with you because you won’t let her have or do something she wants. The child believes this thing will be good, but as the parent you know it will not. You don’t withhold because you are unloving. You withhold precisely because you love.
Why is it so hard to believe that God does the exact same thing?
Imagine with me: What if God is much bigger & wiser than you’ve ever believed? What if God sees ten thousand things you can’t see?
Though it might seem that all God’s breakers & waves are passing over you right now, the only one who ever experienced all God’s breakers & waves was Jesus on the cross. In God’s mercy, He doesn’t deal with us according to what we deserve.
Instead, Jesus took the full wrath of God on the cross in your place, so that you could be forgiven and receive God’s grace.
If you are in Christ, this storm will NOT end in your destruction, because your debt is paid in full! Jesus is with you in the storm, and He controls the storm. The storm is not sent to punish you, but to purify you.
Don’t disconnect verse 7 with verse 8! God’s love is a sovereign love. Day and night it is steadfast. Through the storms, it is steadfast. Jesus, asleep on the boat with His disciples, was not caught off guard by the storm. Disciples: “Don’t you care that we are going to drown?”
No matter how fierce the waves, God’s love is steadfast day & night towards His children. Period. This storm will NOT end in your destruction! Jesus is with you in it.
Rest in God’s Sovereign Love.
Jesus: “O you of little faith”.

Stop Listening To Your “Self” & Start Talking To Your “Self”

Explanation
Two times in this psalm, he repeats a refrain:
Psalm 42:5 ESV
Why are you cast down, O my soul, and why are you in turmoil within me? Hope in God; for I shall again praise him, my salvation
He actually has an inner dialogue with himself. The psalmist preaches the Gospel to himself.
"Most of the unhappiness in your life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself" - Martyn Lloyd-Jones
“My sin is far too great for God to forgive”
“These things are happening to me because God is punishing me”
“No one else has these problems. Something is wrong with me”
“If God loved me He wouldn’t let this happen to me”
My dad used to call it, “Stinkin’ Thinkin’”
Make no mistake. Depression is spiritual warfare. Behind depression is the “Father of Lies”, Satan. Depression leaves us vulnerable, and Satan attacks.
Can I get a witness on this? How many have been attacked by Satan like this?
When negative thoughts & doubts come, ask yourself, “Would God say something like that? Or does this sound like something the devil would say?”
Ed Welch describes the process like this:
You are spiritually vulnerable —> your emotions are so powerful they skew your interpretations —> Satan attacks —> you swear allegiance to your most pessimistic interpretation no matter what others say (Ed Welch, Depression: Looking Up From the Stubborn Darkness)
Can I get a witness on this? How many have been attacked by Satan like this?
Talk to Your “Self”
We’ve got to stop internalizing destructive lies & speak truth back to them! You cannot let how you feel govern what is true.
“My sin is far too great for god to forgive”
Why are you cast down, “Self”? Christ Jesus died for sinners! And He rose from the dead, proving that my sentence has been paid in full!
“These things are happening to me because God is punishing me”
Why are you in turmoil, Self? “There is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus”! God will not punish me for my sin, because Jesus was punished for my sin. I’m forgiven and redeemed by grace through faith
How To Talk to Your “Self”
Look to the cross
Jerry Bridges says we should preach the Gospel to ourselves every day.
Jerry Bridges says we should preach the Gospel to ourselves every day.
Jerry Bridges says we should preach the Gospel to ourselves every day.
“All have sinned & fall short of the glory of God”. Though I am not perfect, I am a new creation being transformed to be more like Jesus each day. I’m not what I should be, but I’m not who I used to be.
“Why are you cast down?”
Stop looking to your circumstances for evidence that God loves you!
Stop looking to your circumstances for evidence that God loves you!
“If God loved me He wouldn’t let this happen to me”
"The cross is the only evidence that can fully persuade you that God is, at all times, good and generous" - Ed Welch
You don’t need to look for signs. GOD: "I've already sent My Son Jesus to die on a cross for you. What else do I have to do to convince you that I love you?"
You don’t need to look for signs. GOD: "I've already sent My Son Jesus to die on a cross for you. What else do I have to do to convince you that I love you?"
GOD: "I've already sent My Son Jesus to die on a cross for you. What else do I have to do to convince you that I love you?"
If you are “in Christ”, God loves you with an everlasting love!
I don’t care how many storms you endure. It’s true!
Memorize the Word
We talked about spiritual warfare the other day. How are you going to have faith in God’s promises if you don’t know what they are?
We don’t urge you to read your Bibles so God will love you. We urge you to read your Bibles because God ALREADY loves you!
What if, in the midst of your deepest depression, you had at the ready?
Romans 8:38 NLT
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love.
Be with people of the Word
The psalmist had enemies that taunted him. “Where is your God?”
Some of you even have family members who will try to poke holes in your faith & urge you to abandon God when things get hard.
That’s why Lighthouses & Stages are so important.
Be around people who will speak the truth of God’s Word to you!
You might say to me, “I have cried out to God, and it does no good. He doesn’t answer me when I pray. Things only seem to get worse”.

Seek God, Not Relief

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