Marriage as Covenant
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The Pillar New Testament Commentary: The Gospel according to Mark Discipleship and Marriage (10:1–12)
In ancient Judaism, marriage was not regarded as a union of equals for the mutual benefit of both husband and wife but rather as an institution whose chief purpose was the establishment and continuance of the family and whose chief enemy was childlessness.
The Pillar New Testament Commentary: The Gospel according to Mark Discipleship and Marriage (10:1–12)
Jesus, however, teaches that marriage is not a male-dominated institution but a new creation of God, to which both husband and wife are equally responsible to practice discipleship in lifelong obedience.
The sermon this morning
The sermon this morning
The sermon this morning reminds my why preaching through books of the bible is the best way to preach. Because, if I chose the passages or topics that i wanted to preach on the subject of divorce would be pretty far down the list (next to tithing).
However we serve a faithful God who does not avoid difficult subject to talk about, and has called as your pastor to speak for him concerning what the bible says.
The reason divorce is a difficult subject to preach about is because divorce is such sensitive and painful subject to so many people. Statistics have shown that in the U.S. 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second, and 73% of third marriages end in divorce.
Not only is this a sensitive and painful topic, it is also a hotly debated topic within the church.
What does the bible say about divorce and remarriage.
Many different positions
No divorce, no remarriage
Divorce, no remarriage (adultery)
Divorce, remarriage (adultery)
Divorce, remarriage (for a variety of reasons)
I am not looking to argue a theological system that makes sense of divorce.
Divorce is messy.
Divorce is painful.
Divorce is rarely black and white.
Part of the reason there are so many different positions on divorce and remarriage is because the bible does not give a systematic treatment of the issue. To get the fullest sense of the issue requires us to have a broad understanding of the bible.
So this morning, We will be looking at and using that as a launching place to see what the bible says about divorce and remarriage
Lets Pray.
Contracts (Introduction)
Contracts are binding documents between to parties that
Sometimes that is a good thing
Russell Westbrook signed a point guard for the OKC Thunder signed a $205m contract
rental agreements
Employment Contracts
I had a friend who wanted to start a company but could not because of a non-compete clause in his contract.
What many people do is seek to find loopholes in a contract
In fact, there are times where I find it enjoyable and challenging trying to find loopholes in contracts
Sprint - bad service
Verizon - dead spot
Now, in our passage this morning the Pharisees were asking Jesus about a loophole they thought existed in the marriage contract.
This is the first flaw in their thinking - marriage is first a covenant before its any sort of contract.
But we’ll get into that first, turn with me to
1 And he left there and went to the region of Judea and beyond the Jordan, and crowds gathered to him again. And again, as was his custom, he taught them.
Location
The region of Judea beyond the Jordan
Jesus and his disciples are moving toward Jerusalem and now they are in the region of Judea.
Judea is the place where Herod rules with great authority.
And as he arrives crowds gather together around him, as his fame has spread into this region, and he taught them.
Jesus the Teacher
Jesus the Teacher
This verse struck me this week. Mark tells us that Jesus taught the people.
We serve of God who communicates, who teaches, who cares enough to reveal himself to his people through spoken and written word.
Mark does not tell us what Jesus was teaching, but it is amazing how revolutionary Jesus’ teachings were.
If you remember back in chapter one when Jesus taught in the synagogue the people marveled because he taught with such authority.
He was one who taught with the very authority of God himself. Why? because he is the word of God.
Who has Red Letter bibles?
I remember as a kid having a red letter bible going through the gospels and noting where Jesus was talking and where he was not talking.
Then you move through the rest of the NT and you see some red letters in Acts and you see some red letters in the first few chapters of Revelations.
However, if you go backwards from Matthew into the Old Testament you don’t see any red letters. As if Jesus doesn’t teach in the OT.
However, this is not good. because, Jesus didn’t begin his teaching ministry during his earthly ministry. Jesus was teaching from the beginning.
In fact, whenever you see God speaking in the OT, we often think that God the Father is talking, yet, according to Johns gospel when God speaks in the OT it actually Jesus speaking.
Almost the whole book of Leviticus should be red letters in your bibles
Most of the book of Exodus should be red letters
You see, Jesus has been teaching from the beginning. The book of Leviticus is like one big sermon from Jesus to Moses.
You see, Jesus has been teaching from the beginning. The book of Leviticus is like one big sermon from Jesus to Moses.
So when Jesus, who has been speaking and preaching throughout the ages to his people comes in the flesh and begins to teach, he teaches with all authority.
Why?
Because he is the one who spoke all things into existence.
He is the very word of God
He is the beginning and the end.
He is the great I AM who spoke to Moses from the burning bush
He is the one who met Moses on the mountain and gave him the law.
Jesus is the one who speaks to his people.
And here we see Jesus continuing to speak even in his earthly ministry.
The teaching of God’s words to his people is so important
Now, again, we don’t know what Jesus was teaching the people, but we do know that the Pharisee’s were not interested in his teaching, but were more interested in trying to get Jesus in trouble
2 And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?”
If you remember back in Mark chapter 3 the Pharisee’s teamed up with the Herodians (King Herod’s people) and they were plotting a way to destroy Jesus
So since then the Pharisee’s have had ill intentions when they have incountered Jesus. And this time is no different
Mark says that they came up in order to test him.
This word for test is means to try and trap someone, or to obtain information to be used against a person by trying to cause someone to make a mistake—‘to try to trap, to attempt to catch in a mistake.’
So the Pharisee’s have a plan here. They are scheming. So what is their plan?
M
2 And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?”
They ask him whether or not its lawful for a man to divorce his wife
So what the angle here? why are they asking Jesus about divorce?
Remember
They are in Judea - Herod’s territory
They have already teamed up with the Herodians trying to destroy Jesus
And if we remember in Chapter 6 John the baptist lost his head because he opposed Herod’s divorce and remarriage of his brother wife.
So now the pharisees and hoping that maybe they can catch Jesus in the same way John was caught. by asking him about marriage.
Example??
The reason marriage and divorce were hot topic issues, as they are today, is because even during the time of Jesus there were different views on what the OT, tradition, and rabbis had to say concerning marriage and divorce.
You see, what had happened in Jesus day is that marriage became less of a covenant, and more of a contract.
Marriage: Contract or Covenant?
Marriage: Contract or Covenant?
There was a leader of the Pharisee’s named Hillel, though he died when Jesus was around 7 years old, his influence and legacy lived on for over 400 years.
Hillel was very influential among the Pharisees and the entire Jewish religious system.
People considered Hillel a modern day Moses. And he had a lot to say about marriage.
Hillel argued that marriage was more of a contract than a covenant. And the contract heavily favored the husband in all matters.
Hillel argued that Moses allowed a husband to write a certificate of divorce to his wife for pretty much any reason.
The marriage was a contract and Hillel taught that there were a lot of loop holes that aloud the husband to divorce his wife.
Hillel taught
a man can divorce his wife if she is annoying, embarrassing, or burns dinner.
A man can divorce his wife if she talks to much or does not obey everything he says.
This is the interpretation of the OT that the pharisee are holding too.
So they come to Jesus, wanting to entrap him, and ask him about his view of divorce.
How does Jesus respond?
2 And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” 3 He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” 4 They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away.” 5 And Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment.
2 And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?” 3 He answered them, “What did Moses command you?” 4 They said, “Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and to send her away.”
Mark 10.2
What did Moses Command you?
Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament based on Semantic Domains 27.31 πειράζω; ἐκπειράζω
πειράζωb; ἐκπειράζωb: to obtain information to be used against a person by trying to cause someone to make a mistake—‘to try to trap, to attempt to catch in a mistake.’
to which they responded by quoting
Asking Jesus about divorce in Herod territory was an attempt to have Jesus share the same fate as John the Baptist
1 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house,
Deut 24:
The pharisees have already teamed up with the Herodians 3.6
Now what has happened is that the Pharisees have interpreted this verse to mean that divorce is ok as long as your write her a certificate of divorce.
d this verse to mean that divorce is ok as long as your write her a certificate of divorce.
Herod had John beheaded for opposing his divorce and remarriage.
However, that is not what this passage is saying
Contract divorce?
You see, the indecency that he has found in her is what allows for the divorce
The indecency is not
the wife being annoying, embarrassing, unable to cook or anything like that.
Because the husband doesn’t like the wife
The indecency is not just anything that the husband doesn’t like.
The word interpreted indecency is the Hebrew word עֶרְוָה which literally means, nakedness
and this word nakedness is a Hebrew euphemism meaning adultery
So in this passage Moses is allowing for divorce in the event that the wife cheats on her husband.
Yet, God is gracious and the certificate of divorce that was given to her freed her to marry again and it returned a percentage of the dowery she brought to the marriage.
The certificate of divorce provided provision for the woman.
Now we know its clear that God hates divorce, and we will get into why that is soon, but first why is it that if God hates divorce does Moses allow it to happen?
Jesus answers this in verse 5
5 And Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment.
5
God knows the hearts of his people, both men and woman, both husbands and wives.
because the wife gets board
God knows that his people are stiff-necked hard hearted people. Yet God loves his people like a husband
God allowed for divorce in some circumstances as a contingency for their hard heartedness.
because they don’t get along etc.
If a husband or a wife breaks th
You see, the allowance of divorce has to do with breaking the covenant of marriage, not breaking some contract. There are no loopholes in the covenant of marriage.
So what does it mean to break the covenant of marriage?
Certificate of Divorce
This is an issue that has a lot controversy surrounding it today. As it obviously did in Jesus’ day as well.
The Gospel of Mark 10. The Question of Divorce. Ch. 10:1–12
Moses permitted divorce providing a certificate of divorce was given to the wife. This provision assumes the practice of divorce and describes a right to which a wife is entitled: she is to be given a bill of divorce which authenticates her release from the marriage contract and affirms her right to remarry. The Mosaic provision was made for the contingency of divorce, but did not in itself determine whether that contingency was right or wrong. Its primary function was to provide a degree of protection for the woman who had been repudiated by her husband.9
I believe the bible gives three categories that can result in breaking the marriage covenant
It is important to note that if a spouse breaks the marriage covenant the Bible does NOT require the other spouse to divorce. But allows for it.
So under what circumstances does the Bible allow for divorce?
Sexual Immorality
Sexual Immorality
9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”
31 “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.
So Jesus is saying here that divorce is wrong except on the ground of sexual immorality
The word used for sexual immorality is the word Porneias
This word has a broader meaning that just being sexually unfaithful in your marriage
This word is used for all sorts of sexual sins
For us today this would include all sorts of sexual perversions including, but not limited to unfaithfulness
Another way we see the marriage covenant being broken is through
Covenantal Desertion
Covenantal Desertion
Transgender lifestyles
in we see Paul talking to husbands and wives who are married to someone who is not a believer. And he says that as long as they uphold God’s view of covenantal marriage the husband or wife should stay with them. But if they desert the covenant of marriage they believing spouse is not bound to the marriage, but they can divorce and be at peace.
To desert the covenant is when one spouse refuses to live according to the covenant of marriage.
They desert their role in the marriage
They no longer live at home, they no longer provide, they no longer share a bed, they no longer are living as married.
15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace.
The final category the bible gives us for divorce is death.
Death
Death
Now, in the OT when someone would do something that is deserving of the death penalty the marriage covenant is broken by death.
However, we do not enforce the death penalty today as they did in the OT.
However the principle still stands… If a spouse is living in such a way that would demand the death penalty the other spouse is biblically justified to divorce.
Matthew 5:
I have heard some people argue from a permanence view (No divorce, no remarriage) of marriage saying that divorce is sinful no matter what, under any circumstances
I’ve heard others argue the adultery is the only justifiable reason for divorce, saying that you could be married to a mass murderer and you are not allowed to divorce him.
This discussion Jesus had with the Pharisees got the disciples thinking, so they later asked Jesus about divorce and remarriage.
Covenant Divorce
Sexual immorality (adultery)
Covenantal desertion
Crime (OT death penalty)
The church should excommunicate, and a godly spouse may divorce. Both actions are NOT a removal of the offending party from the marriage covenant. They are a legal recognition that the person has already removed himself.
Remarriage
Remarriage
10 And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. 11 And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, 12 and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”
Remarriage
Remarriage
Remarriage
Here Jesus is talking about divorce that occurs without a breaking of the covenant.
You see, the marriage covenant is a real binding covenant between husband, wife, and God. And unless the covenant is broken divorce is not allowed
The marriage covenant is so strong and so real that divorce itself cannot break the covenant
So if a husband and wife divorce because they are cannot agree on what kind sheets they want on the bed they are not permitted to remarry another person because to do this is the break the marriage covenant. Its to commit adultery.
However, if the divorce is the result of a broken covenant then you are free to remarry.
Sexual immorality - Jesus says you can remarry
Covenantal abandonment - Paul says you can remarry
Death penalty - The Law and Paul says you can remarry
But outside of a broken marriage covenant remarriage is not an option.
So what is this marriage covenant?
Why is marriage such a big deal?
Why do we consider marriage a covenant rather than a contract?
Marriage Covenant
Marriage Covenant
Marriage is designed to demonstrate the covenant love God has for his people
We see in the OT that YHWH was married to his people Israel
8 “When I passed by you again and saw you, behold, you were at the age for love, and I spread the corner of my garment over you and covered your nakedness; I made my vow to you and entered into a covenant with you, declares the Lord God, and you became mine.
Eze
Yet Israel was an unfaithful bride, breaking covenant with God. To the point where in YHWH serves Israel a certificate of Divorce.
Its not until after this divorce that Israel repents and returns to God
The book of Hosea is an enacted parable demonstrating this reality that God loves his bride, yet his bride is a covenant breaker chasing after other men.
Malachi also describes the covenantal nature of marriage
13 And this second thing you do. You cover the Lord’s altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. 14 But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. 15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. 16 “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
Mal
Notice what he says in verse 14
“YHWH was witness between you and the wife of your youth
6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. 9 What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
14 But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant.
The marriage covenant is not only between husband and wife, but it is a three-way covenant with husband, wife, and God.
God is not talking to his people about breaking a contract, but about breaking covenant.
This is a very important reality in your lives if you are married
Your marriage not only involves you and your spouse, but God is part of that covenant as well.
Husbands, if you are not loving your wives well, you are not loving God well
Wives, if you are not respecting your husbands well, you are not respecting God well.
Your marriage is far greater than a contract signed on your wedding day, your marriage is participation with spouse and God in covenant.
This reality of marriage is what Jesus communicated to the pharisee’s when Jesus says
6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. 9 What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
6-
The Pharisee’s wanted to trip up Jesus, they wanted him to try and combat their logic and their arguments for marriage and divorce. And what Jesus does is brilliant
He asked them what did Moses command you?
They responded with the contract that Moses allowed because of sin
Jesus goes to Moses as well, as the author of Genesis, and gives the true answer
God made male and female - this is the only design that works for marriage
Man shall leave his parents (the covenant that he was once apart of) and hold fast to his wife
to hold fast is to cling to, to stay with, to bind together - this is the marriage covenant, the marriage bond.
They are so bound together that they become on flesh, no longer two, but one flesh.
Then Jesus says this, “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.
God is the one who joins us together with our spouses, and we are joined together in the covenant bond that includes God himself.
Marriage is a picture of God’s love for his people.
If you are married here this morning your marriage is a covenant bond between you, your spouse and God. And your marriage is to be a light in the dark world demonstrating God’s love for his people
5 And Jesus said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart he wrote you this commandment. 6 But from the beginning of creation, ‘God made them male and female.’ 7 ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, 8 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. 9 What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”
God has joined the church
I know some of you have experienced divorce first hand
Jesus does not try and debate the finer parts of the Law, he does not point out the flaws in their thinking, and he does not call them on their motives.
Some of you might be in the process of considering divorce
God made them male and female
Some of you may have come from a home where mom and dad were divorced
Some of you may still be grieving a divorce from your past
Some of you may need to be set free from unwarranted guilt because of a divorce
Some of you may need to be set free by walking the road of repentance because of an unbiblical divorce
And I want to encourage you that you don’t have to bear that pain alone. The gospel of Jesus offers healing.
Some of you may need to be reminded how precious marriage is in the eyes of God.
The gospel is for you.
Whatever the circumstances are, there is freedom in Christ
Jesus offers
you can be freed from guilt
you can be freed through repentance
you can be freed to pursue your marriage with Christlike vigor who loved his bride, though flawed and unfaithful, all the way to the cross.
Please know, that we have men and women in the church who are here for you if you have been affected by divorce in anyway, or if you fear divorce is in your future. please reach out and let us help you.
Lets pray.
What Jesus does is go back to Creation and argues that Marriage is God’s plan, and God’s plan is that in this union we will reflect God’s covenant love for his people
13 And this second thing you do. You cover the Lord’s altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor from your hand. 14 But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. 15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. 16 “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
14 But you say, “Why does he not?” Because the Lord was witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. 15 Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth. 16 “For the man who does not love his wife but divorces her, says the Lord, the God of Israel, covers his garment with violence, says the Lord of hosts. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and do not be faithless.”
-1
8 “When I passed by you again and saw you, behold, you were at the age for love, and I spread the corner of my garment over you and covered your nakedness; I made my vow to you and entered into a covenant with you, declares the Lord God, and you became mine.
Remarriage
Remarriage
10 And in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. 11 And he said to them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her, 12 and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery.”