Following the Crowd

Wherever you look on the landscape of what is called Christianity today, there is a sobering fact that becomes apparent - Satan is at war against young people. He is attacking them hard - and he is being successful. Many studies and polls that have been done show that anywhere between 60-70% of young people either never come to believe the Gospel or leave the Lord for an extended amount of time after the age of 15.

Every young person is being attacked by Satan in some way. He desires that they fall and not believe.

Today, I would like to begin a series of lessons dealing with some of the attacks that Satan makes against young people so the young people here can be equipped better to face challenges they will face.

I have gotten a lot of feedback so far for these lessons from our young people and from young people I know elsewhere.

Peer pressure Busyness Worldly philosophies Sexual temptation & dating Pornography Being a light to your friends

If you are a young person here, and if you would like to share with me some of the areas where you are challenged the most, I would be happy to deal with that subject in a lesson also. This list of lessons is not written in stone in any way… Please share with me how I can be helpful to you.

For our first lesson in this series, I would like to discuss a challenge that young people face that many studies and polls show that over half of young people would say is their greatest challenge - that challenge is peer pressure

Types of Peer Pressure

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Depending on the circumstances, peer pressure can be either positive or negative.

Positive: spurs young people to try harder, avoid mistakes, make good choices, keep them from doing wrong. Negative (which we will focus on today): can cause young people to abandon Biblical principles in the decision making process. The desire to be liked and not made fun of or the desire to not be different than the crowd can lead young people to compromise little by little. It is easier at times to go with the flow - to follow the crowd - than it is to do what is right. Negative peer pressure affects even those who are in elementary school. Children of all ages are affected by their peers in some way. Even kindergarteners are made fun of by their peers. Kids who don’t fit in – might be excluded from playground activities, etc The media fuels the fire of negative peer pressure. They often set the standard for the peers of our young people regarding what is cool and what is not. Anyone not seen “buying in” is seen by peers are weird; old-fashioned; hopelessly outdated.

We need to keep in mind: With many young people – their peer group is their world. How their friends treat them or what their friends think of them impacts how they view themselves. They can be affected when they are around friends who care little/nothing about religion. Difficult for them to live their faith consistently Many young people put off obeying the Gospel because they are too afraid of what their peers will think

For our lesson today, I would like to talk about some areas where young people are challenged by peer pressure, and then we will consider some things at the end of the lesson about how to overcome it

SPECIFIC AREAS OF PEER PRESSURE

APPEARANCE

Having the perfect body. Self conscious society over-concerned with appearance. Vain society. Teens want to grow up looking good – however the media defines it. Girls – want to be beautiful and have guys give them attention Boys: big chest; six-pack abs; muscular arms, etc. Self conscious young people measure themselves against prevailing cultural standards. Are they growing too fast? Too slow? Too big? Too small? Fat? Skinny? Hair color; complexion, etc. Society continues to equate personal value & worth with outward appearance

Having right clothes & look. Dress is one of the strongest types of adolescent pp. Young people who wear “out of style” clothes automatically are classified as odd and strange by their peers. How many parents find frustration w/immodest clothing for kids? Form fitting; skin revealing, or clothing that will make your kids stand out The goal of young people in choosing attire often isn’t immodesty or being sexually appealing; it’s about wanting to appear older than they are, to be in style, or to be accepted by their peer group. The pressure is very real & the price of rejection can be huge

BEING SOCIALLY LINKED WITH THE RIGHT PEOPLE IN THE RIGHT ACTIVITIES

What makes a teen cool in the eyes of their peers? Studies show that it mostly has to do with their social life Being funny, having an outgoing personality, having lots of friends, popularity with the opposite sex. Relationships w/ the opposite sex Not being in a relationship with someone of the opposite sex can often make young people feel “left out” and compromise on who they would be willing to date so that they can have someone as a boyfriend/girlfriend. Not having a boyfriend/girlfriend can lead young people to become obsessed with their appearance. Peer pressure in this area can lead many young girls to starve themselves. Eating disorders are prevalent among young women who are trying to get the attention of guys Athletic ability & involvement in sports – play a significant role in how young people are accepted by peers. Avg. middle school and high school social ladder: boys involved in after school sports & girls involved in cheer-leading are typically the most popular, so many young people will be involved in these things so that they hopefully can become popular. Involvement in these activities increase the likelihood that certain people would want to be their friends

ENTERTAINMENT CHOICES

ENTERTAINMENT CHOICES Music, TV shows and movies, etc. Not feeling up to date on all of the famous people friends are talking about leads young people to feel pressured to keep up on all of these things so they don’t feel awkward in conversations with friends.

Music, TV shows and movies, etc. Not feeling up to date on all of the famous people friends are talking about leads young people to feel pressured to keep up on all of these things so they don’t feel awkward in conversations with friends.

ALCOHOL, TOBACCO, DRUGS

Media culture glorifies alcohol. Improve life; allow to have fun; increase sex appeal; fill days w/joy. Research shows a powerful connection between what ones friends are doing & how that influences what we do. Main indicator if they will start: do they have friends who are doing it? National Institute for Child Health & Human Development: the single most important factor is the behavior of your child’s 5 closest friends. Mueller: 9 out of 10 teens experiment with alcohol. 3 out of 5 experiment with illicit drugs. 10 out of 10 feel the pressure from friends who are doing it.

BECOME SEXUALLY ACTIVE.

Premaritial sexual activity of all kids is viewed as appropriate & normal. Family Planning Perspectives: 8 of 10 teen boys & 7 out of 10 girls will have sex – often with numerous partners. In the world, to be marked as someone who is not sexually active will often get you labeled in some way. Changing bodies, media portrayal of sexual behavior, and changing cultural norms all combine to put extreme pressure on our young people.

These pressures: Force young people into moral dilemmas Cause young people to buy into lies Cause young people to harm their self image Strain relationships between young people & parents

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Remember that Satan WILL use those who are close to you to get you to fall If Jesus was willing to do this with Jesus, he will be willing to do it with us also!

Remember your goal in life if you are a Christian “we make it our aim to please him. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, so that each one may receive what is due for what he has done in the body, whether good or evil.” The central focus of the life of the Christian is to please God, not man. Whenever we allow pressure from our peers lead us to compromise on our morality or our convictions, we are showing that we would rather please man than God, and that we fear what man may think of us more than God in these instances. We can make our relationships with friends an idol when we do this…

Remember that you are called to self-denial () Young people, if you have obeyed the Gospel, remember that you are not called to a lower standard of living than adults who are Christians. Sometimes we tend to talk like young people are on a lower rung of the ladder spiritually and have a different level of service they are called to. This is not the case… Young Christians are called to deny themselves just as much as older Christians are. Younger Christians are to use their resources and abilities to serve God’s people and to be a light to the lost in the world!

Remember what God says about the things you are being pressured to do Lying Immodest clothing Sexual immorality Alcohol & sobriety Materialism Idolatry etc.

Choose your friends carefully , Show us the dangers of surrounding ourselves with the wrong kind of people. "Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm." () "My son, if sinners entice you, do not consent. If they say, "Come with us, let us lie in wait for blood; let us ambush the innocent without reason; like Sheol let us swallow them alive, and whole, like those who go down to the pit; we shall find all precious goods, we shall fill our houses with plunder; throw in your lot among us; we will all have one purse"— my son, do not walk in the way with them; hold back your foot from their paths," () If you do have friends who are nonChristians, the wisdom given in these passages can be helpful to you. If you are a companion of those who do not obey the Lord and walk with them, it can hurt you spiritually. Don’t assume you will be the one who is strong enough to not be affected. Solomon says that when you are pressured to do wrong, do not consent. Don’t make the choice to do wrong. Get away. keep your feet from their paths!

Can you say someone is a ‘friend’ and that they care about you if they are trying to get you to compromise your convictions? If you have a nonChristian friend, remember your call to be a light to them

Conclusion & invitation

Conclusion

Conclusion & invitation Conclusion Young people, Satan is at war against you and he will use your peers, among many of the other things we will talk about in this series to lead you astray. Be aware of these truths - remember the things we have talked about so you can stand against the schemes of the evil one. Make it your goal to spend more time with peers who can be helpful to you spiritually. Invitation But most importantly, seek to draw nearer to God to find strength to overcome If you are falling prey to peer pressure, my prayer for you today is that you would reach out for help. If you are allowing fears of what your friends may think to keep you from doing what right, especially obeying the Gospel, today is a great day to begin to do what is right so you can be pleasing to the LORD.

Young people, Satan is at war against you and he will use your peers, among many of the other things we will talk about in this series to lead you astray. Be aware of these truths - remember the things we have talked about so you can stand against the schemes of the evil one. Make it your goal to spend more time with peers who can be helpful to you spiritually.

Invitation

But most importantly, seek to draw nearer to God to find strength to overcome If you are falling prey to peer pressure, my prayer for you today is that you would reach out for help. If you are allowing fears of what your friends may think to keep you from doing what right, especially obeying the Gospel, today is a great day to begin to do what is right so you can be pleasing to the LORD.

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