Sexual Temptation

Our culture practically drowns young people in seductive messages and sexual temptation. Virtually all popular media (movies, TV, videos, music, the Internet) have been deeply influenced by the sexual revolution of the 1960s. So have most educational, healthcare, and governmental organizations. As a result, unless they live in complete isolation, young people are regularly exposed to sexually provocative material that expresses immoral viewpoints, fires up sexual desires, and wears down their resistance to the attractions of physical intimacy.

There's also the problem of parents overreacting to these social trends. Moms and dads who (like you) worry about where the culture is headed morally and who want to protect their kids can easily fall into the trap of smothering young people in a controlling, micromanaging, suspicious environment where young people often feel like their parents do not trust them to do what’s right and to be faithful to Christ.

Then you have the flip-side of the "overbearing parent" coin… what we talked about in our first lesson: peer pressure. While mom and dad are saying "no," all the young people at school are saying "yes." Peer pressure is often strong in this area. There’s the general sense that "everyone is doing it except me." Then there are the remarks from peers about how weird it is that they are still a virgin. Then to top it all off, often when young people are dating, the person they are dating will try to get them to compromise.

These are just a few examples of the pressures that young people face in this area… Hopefully our lesson today can be helpful to them in overcoming

God’s Standard

Let’s begin by talking about God’s standard for us morally…

We need to remember the standard that the Lord gives us in His word. What is the standard that God gives all of us - including young people - in regards to sexual morality? Let’s look at verses 3&4:

[3] For this is God's will, your sanctification: that you keep away from sexual immorality, [4] that each of you knows how to control his own body in holiness and honor, (CSBBible)

Take note of two of the words Paul uses in these verses: sanctification and holiness. If you desire to do God’s will in this area of your life, the standard for you is to seek holiness, to seek to use your body for His purposes instead of sin. Look also at verse 7:

[7] For God has not called us to impurity but to live in holiness. (CSBBible)

It can be easy for us to accept a standard that is not as high as what God gives us in His word - the standard of seeking holiness and purity sexually. We see this often when young people date. I would encourage you to consider what I am about to say… There are questions that are often asked by people about dating and about having a boyfriend/girlfriend that I believe show that a lower standard has already been set for purity. Here are the questions: “how far is too far?” “Where is the line in a relationship?” Is it kissing? Is it making out? It is not wrong to ask these type of questions, but what often happens is that the questions are asked, “How far is too far? Where do you cross the line?” and then those who ask the questions try to get as close to the line as they possibly can…

I would encourage you to challenge yourself to ask WHY you ask these type of questions. If you have the mindset that you want to get as close to the line as you can - as close to sin as you can - you are already approaching your relationships with the opposite sex with too low of a standard - a standard that is going to put you into the line of fire of Satan! Just keep in mind, wherever you set the boundary for your relationship, you will be tempted to cross that boundary. If you have hugging as where you stop, you will be tempted to kiss the person. If you have kissing as the line, you will be tempted to have more passionate kissing or even putting your hands places where they shouldn’t go. We could go on and on - hopefully you get the point. Please try to show wisdom in where you place boundaries in the relationship.

And keep in mind, Paul says in our text in that it is God’s will that you “keep away from sexual immorality,” To keep away from it, not creep up as close as you can to it. This is like trying to see how close you can put your hand to a campfire before you get burned. It is dangerous. Keep away from it. Don’t take the risk.

Paul says in to “Flee sexual immorality!” Do the relationships that you have with the opposite sex show that this is your desire? To flee sexual immorality?

Motivation for Holiness

The second main point I would like you to consider is our motivation for holiness that Paul gives us in this passage…

First, this should be our motivation in all that we do as Christians: pleasing God… Paul shows us this in verses one and two. If you desire to please God in your life, remember the instructions that Paul gives here. Seek to please the Lord even more in your life by seeking to become more holy and by using your time more for his purposes. Paul says in verse 8 that if we reject these teachings about sexual morality and holiness, we are rejecting the Lord. We are not pleasing Him if we are rejecting these teachings. The one who has as their aim in life to please the Lord will look at these teachings of Paul, no matter how unpopular they may be in the world, and say, “I want to please the Lord. I want to follow what Paul says.”

We need to remember that we have been given God’s Spirit. Our bodies are temples of God, and because of this, what we do with our bodies is important.

This should be more than enough motivation for us to seek sexual purity. But if it is not, Paul reminds us in verse six that He will hold us accountable for sexual sin. “…the Lord is avenger of all these offenses” (4:6).

How Can I Be Holy?

And finally, let’s talk about application… Practically speaking, how can we grow in holiness?

Paul gives these brethren in Thessalonica the keys to grow in holiness…

Show self-restraint or self-control… (v4) Paul builds a contrast here in this passage. He says to control yourself, not with lustful passions, but instead, with holiness and honor. If you are following your passions, then you are not showing self-control. You choose what you allow to rule you. You decide what you think and what you do. You decide if you are going to do what’s right or to follow the standard of the world.

In talking about sexually immorality, Paul says in , [12] "Everything is permissible for me," but not everything is beneficial. "Everything is permissible for me," but I will not be mastered by anything. [13] "Food is for the stomach and the stomach for food," and God will do away with both of them. However, the body is not for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body. (CSBBible)

I believe that Paul is dealing with one of the sayings of the Corinthians in this passage. They were claiming that their bodies were made to do certain things. They have appetites that must be fulfilled - whether that be for food - for sexual pleasure, etc. But Paul tells them that they are not to be mastered by their appetites, and ultimately, their bodies were not made for sexual immorality but to be used for the Lord - to bring glory to him by using it in ways that honor Him.

Don’t let your flesh be your guide in making decisions in your relationships with the opposite sex. Let what God says to guide you in your relationship decisions - whom you are willing to date - what you choose to set boundaries - where you spend time with the person you are dating - and even in what you are going to wear when you are around the opposite sex. Let God’s wisdom be your guide. Choose to do it God’s way.

Then in v5, Paul tells them to not live like those who do not know God… Remember that the world’s perspective about sexuality, dating, and marriage is, the majority of the time, not God’s perspective. The world looks at living with someone before marriage as a good thing. The world, in general, looks at having a sexual relationship before marriage as a good thing. The world says, “do whatever pleases you and makes you happy. Everyone else is doing it.” Well, this is not true. Those who desire to please the Lord and to live lives seeking holiness so not approach life this way. The world allows their lustful desires to be their guide because they do not know God. Paul says, “Do not live like the gentiles who do not know God.”

Keep in mind that the traditional way of doing things in regards to dating is from the world. If you are going to take part in it, you need to make sure you do it in a God-Glorifying way that does not feed the flesh and shows concern for your purity and the purity of the one you are dating.

And our final point in growing in holiness: Don’t take advantage of others. Here in this context, Paul is talking about relationships within the church, but surely their is an application regarding relationships with outsiders also. Don’t sin against others and take advantage of others in this area… Some versions say, “do not defraud one another in this area. The word Paul uses here is talking about not having a covetous attitude and taking from someone what you do not have the right to take. Taking something selfishly and greedily at another’s expense. Don’t selfishly steal the purity of another or commit sexual sin with someone you don’t have the right to have a sexual relationship with.

The only person God has given you the authority to have a sexual relationship with is the person you marry. That is it… Only within the confines of a lawful marriage is the sexual relationship pleasing to the Lord and holy. To have this kind of relationship with anyone else - to allow your lusts to guide you into a physical relationship with someone who is not your spouse is to take advantage of another person who is made int he image of God and is worthy of honor - of being valued as God’s image bearer.

Conclusion

To bring our lesson to an end, I would like you, young people, to ask yourself some questions:

Are you aiming for the right standard in your thinking and your actions? Are you seeking to please the Lord in your relationships and to be sanctified and holy? Or are you trying to get as close to sin as you possibly can? God’s standard is high, and the one who is striving to please the Lord will aim to meet the standard of God instead of doing what everyone else around them in the world is doing.

Do you often put yourself into situations where you are tempted to sin? Remember, you have the choice of where you spend your time with the young person you are dating. Do not think that if you put yourselves into situations where you are often alone, such as at each other’s house or apartment or car, that you are not going to be tempted to fall. For many, if not most guys, that may mean not going to some school activities, such as dances or prom because of the temptations there will be to lust because of the immodest dress of the majority of the girls.

Don’t assume that you will be strong enough to overcome the temptation. Purity is too important to put yourself into positions where you may fall into sin.

Have you talked to the person you are dating about physical boundaries? Do you talk about your desire to remain pure and to meet the Lord’s standard of not having sex before marriage? If you don’t create boundaries right away and you are the only one in the relationship that is concerned about putrid, you are setting yourself up for failure.

Does the person you have a relationship with trying to get you to compromise? If they know you are a Christian and you have talked to them about physical boundaries (which should be the case)… If even after this, they still try to get you to compromise and tempt you to sin… How can I say this nicely…. KICK THEM TO THE CURB! If they don’t care enough about you and what is important to your life as a Christian, they don’t deserve your time and a relationship with you… Jesus’ instruction to “cut off an arm or a leg or to pluck out an eye” has a good application here… Don’t be in a relationship with someone who is not going to help you spiritually.

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