Matthew 5:31-32

Introduction

English Standard Version Chapter 5

Divorce

31 “It was also said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ 32 But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

This week we continue our study in Matthew chapter 5 where Jesus is giving his famous sermon on the mount. His disciples are gathered around him, and in the second half of chapter 5 Jesus begins reforming the popular teachings of the scribes and Pharisees. It’s why he begins each topic with something like, “You have heard that it was said”, or “You have heard it was said to those of old”. Jesus is referring to the popular teachings of his day that had come from the religious leaders in Israel concerning God’s law.

There are six of these particular subjects recorded here in Matthew, and we’ve looked now at 3 of them, including Jesus’ teaching on the sixth commandment (you shall not murder), his teaching on the seventh commandment (you shall not commit adultery), and his teaching concerning oaths.

If you’ll remember two weeks ago I accidentally jumped ahead to verses 33-37, effectively leap frogging Jesus’ teaching on divorce, so today we’re going to spend our time looking at what Jesus teaches us concerning divorce here in verses 31-32. And I think it’s actually quite fitting that we looked at Jesus’ teaching on oaths two weeks ago because here we are today spending time together reading about one of the most sacred covenants in all of Scripture - namely, marriage.

Deuteronomy 24 ESV

“When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the Lord. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the Lord your God is giving you for an inheritance. “When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken. “No one shall take a mill or an upper millstone in pledge, for that would be taking a life in pledge. “If a man is found stealing one of his brothers of the people of Israel, and if he treats him as a slave or sells him, then that thief shall die. So you shall purge the evil from your midst. “Take care, in a case of leprous disease, to be very careful to do according to all that the Levitical priests shall direct you. As I commanded them, so you shall be careful to do. Remember what the Lord your God did to Miriam on the way as you came out of Egypt. “When you make your neighbor a loan of any sort, you shall not go into his house to collect his pledge. You shall stand outside, and the man to whom you make the loan shall bring the pledge out to you. And if he is a poor man, you shall not sleep in his pledge. You shall restore to him the pledge as the sun sets, that he may sleep in his cloak and bless you. And it shall be righteousness for you before the Lord your God. “You shall not oppress a hired worker who is poor and needy, whether he is one of your brothers or one of the sojourners who are in your land within your towns. You shall give him his wages on the same day, before the sun sets (for he is poor and counts on it), lest he cry against you to the Lord, and you be guilty of sin. “Fathers shall not be put to death because of their children, nor shall children be put to death because of their fathers. Each one shall be put to death for his own sin. “You shall not pervert the justice due to the sojourner or to the fatherless, or take a widow’s garment in pledge, but you shall remember that you were a slave in Egypt and the Lord your God redeemed you from there; therefore I command you to do this. “When you reap your harvest in your field and forget a sheaf in the field, you shall not go back to get it. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow, that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands. When you beat your olive trees, you shall not go over them again. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow. When you gather the grapes of your vineyard, you shall not strip it afterward. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow. You shall remember that you were a slave in the land of Egypt; therefore I command you to do this.

Deuteronomy 24

In verse 31 Jesus appears to be referencing the OT teaching concerning divorce, or more specifically, the popular understanding of divorce. And if we survey the OT as it pertains to its teaching on divorce we come to . If you would turn with me to we’ll read together verses 1-4.

English Standard Version Chapter 24

Laws Concerning Divorce

24 “When a man takes a wife and marries her, if then she finds no favor in his eyes because he has found some indecency in her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, and she departs out of his house, 2 and if she goes and becomes another man’s wife, 3 and the latter man hates her and writes her a certificate of divorce and puts it in her hand and sends her out of his house, or if the latter man dies, who took her to be his wife, 4 then her former husband, who sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after she has been defiled, for that is an abomination before the LORD. And you shall not bring sin upon the land that the LORD your God is giving you for an inheritance.

The text is not prescriptive

The first thing we ought to notice is that what Moses says here is not necessarily prescriptive concerning divorce. It does not say “When your wife commits adultery, you ought to hand her a certificate of divorce.” Instead it gives us a hypothetical scenario of a woman who is given a certificate of divorce because of some kind indecency found in her by her husband. Then that same woman goes and marries another man, again, only to be given a certificate of divorce, either because of his death or because he hates her. And finally, Moses, in verse 4, tells us that this woman is not permitted to return to her first husband because she had been defiled, and that remarriage at this point would be an abomination to the Lord.

Guidelines in the event of divorce

Moses doesn’t necessarily give his approval of either of the two divorces found her in verses 1-3. Instead, what I think we see here is a guideline given for divorce with an aim to discourage divorce, to make divorce a less desirable pursuit. There appears to be an underlying acknowledgement, or assumption, that divorce does indeed happen, and that it had been happening for centuries, and given the grievous reality of divorce Moses is writing because he thinks it’s needful to give some guidelines for when it does happen.

So it’s important that we approach this particular text realizing that it is in some ways different than the more direct commands given to us by God through Moses via the ten commandments, for instance. And what I mean by that is that while any of the guidelines given to us by Moses ought to be obeyed with equal necessity, what we find here is that Moses is writing to the Israelites with an assumption that divorce is a grievous result of our fallen and sinful world. If there were no sin there would be no divorce, but because there is sin God grants divorce as a provision for sinful people.

Divorce is a result of sin

While in a sinless world there would be no need for divorce but in a sinful world divorce provide protection against the one sinned against.

In a sinless world there would be no need for divorce, but in a sinful world divorce provides protection against the one sinned against, and what Jesus is getting at here in is that only in the event of sexual immorality is one permitted to seek a divorce. Divorce is never a preferred option, divorce is never to be desired, divorce is never to be held in honor, divorce is never to be a license, or an out, for you to have sexual relations with another person, or for you to escape relationally hard circumstances. Instead, divorce is a last resort in the event of adultery, a result of our sinful propensity to destroy one another by our lusts and unfaithfulness. So let us remember that divorce will have no place in God’s kingdom when Christ returns.

Ridiculous justifications for divorce

Yet, many of the religious leaders in Jesus’ day had come to follow a popular rabbinical teaching that read and understood it to be a favorable endorsement, or even a command, to give a certificate of divorce if the husband found anything shameful or unfavorable in his wife. This led to ridiculous justifications for divorce. In some areas of Israel they permitted divorce even if the husband was simply offended by a spoiled meal, or if he found someone else he preferred over and above his wife.

Jesus responds to the marriage covenant having been trampled under foot

The marriage covenant had been utterly trampled underfoot, and it’s why we see Jesus here making it very clear to his listeners that the only grounds for divorce in the eyes of God is sexual unfaithfulness. Which is why he says in verse 32,

English Standard Version Chapter 5

32 But I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

Illegitimately divorced people constitutes entering into an adulterous relationship

He’s saying that anyone who divorces his wife for anything other than sexual unfaithfulness causes her to commit adultery when she goes on to be remarried to another. In fact, he goes on and says that whoever marries her commits adultery. While a certificate of divorce may be seemingly valid in the eyes of man, unless that divorce is founded on the grounds of sexual infidelity, it’s not valid in the eyes of God. “Therefore, remarriage of illegitimately divorced people constitutes entering into an adulterous relationship.” (Divorce, Reformation Study Bible, p. 1755.)

Matthew 19

Now, I want you to turn with me to , because I think we’ll find significant clarity, particularly in verses 1-9 as Jesus elaborates on his teaching concerning divorce. In this particular instance Jesus is approached by the Pharisees and asked concerning his teaching on divorce which prompts a response from Jesus and in turn gives us a helpful explanation on the subject.

English Standard Version Chapter 19

Teaching About Divorce

19 Now when Jesus had finished these sayings, he went away from Galilee and entered the region of Judea beyond the Jordan. 2 And large crowds followed him, and he healed them there.

3 And Pharisees came up to him and tested him by asking, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” 4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” 7 They said to him, “Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?” 8 He said to them, “Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

Now notice the question that the Pharisees ask, “Is it lawful to divorce one’s wife for any cause?” which highlights two things, 1) that they were probably familiar with what Jesus had been teaching concerning divorce, and 2) that his teaching was in direct conflict with the popular teaching that it was lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause.

And Jesus’ initial response is very helpful and instructive, he says,

English Standard Version Chapter 19

“Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

What Jesus doesn’t do is simply say, “No, it is only lawful to divorce one’s wife on the grounds of sexual immorality.” He will eventually say that, but on the outset Jesus directs the conversation back to the original intent of marriage, because he’s fully aware that he is being tested. He knows that the Pharisees in this situation are not genuinely desiring to know the answer to this burning question, instead they intend to trap Jesus with their contentious question.

So Jesus points them back to Genesis to demonstrate that marriage was never intended to end in divorce, in fact, he shows them that in the marriage covenant the two become one flesh. He shows them that what God has joined together was never meant, or designed to be separated, or divorced.

So the Pharisees press him and ask,

English Standard Version Chapter 19

“Why then did Moses command one to give a certificate of divorce and to send her away?”

I want you to notice two things here 1) they’re attempting to pit Jesus against Moses and 2) in their question they assume that Moses had commanded divorce. Listen to Jesus’ response,

English Standard Version Chapter 19

“Because of your hardness of heart Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. 9 And I say to you: whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery.”

Jesus points out to them that Moses never commanded them to give a certificate of divorce but had only permitted it on certain grounds, and that Moses had only ever allowed it because of their own hardness of heart. In other words, if it weren’t for the sinful actions of men there would be no need for divorce.

To the Pharisees and many others divorce had become a light thing, and even somewhat normal, and Jesus would have none of it. By his assessment God hated divorce, and marriage was not something to be trifled with or taken lightly, divorce wasn’t simply some kind of get out jail free card. Divorce was the destruction of a one flesh union that God never intended.

And it’s quite easy to see this same flippant attitude toward marriage and divorce in our culture today. Marriage for many has largely become merely a means to self-gratification, and when I’m no longer happy or satisfied, or things get difficult, then that’s grounds enough for divorce.

No-fault divorce

In fact, all 50 states have what are called no-fault divorce laws. “[A] no-fault divorce is a divorce in which the dissolution of a marriage does not require a showing of wrongdoing by either party. Laws providing for no-fault divorce allow a family court to grant a divorce in response to a petition by either party of the marriage without requiring the petitioner to provide evidence that the defendant has committed a breach of the marital contract." (Wikipedia, 12/15/2017)

These laws turn the marriage contract into nothing but a formality or a show. There’s no obligation toward one another, no binding commitment. It makes divorce easy and convenient, with as little consequence as possible.

But as Christians we ought never forget that when we enter into a marriage covenant with another person, that God is our witness and that God has no such no-fault divorce laws. We are to remember that divorce was never God’s intention, and that it only exists because of the Fall.

Marriage is ultimately about God

Moreover, we ought to remember that marriage is not primarily about us, instead marriage is primarily about God. God instituted marriage not only for the good of man but ultimately for the glory of God. It’s the reason why Paul wrote these words in Ephesian 5.

English Standard Version Chapter 5

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

The order and structure within the marriage relationship has absolutely nothing to do with whether or not one party is smarter, or better, or of greater importance, instead God’s ordained order within the marriage relationship has everything to do with him. The marriage covenant is meant to be a cameo, or a picture of Christ’s relationship to the church. That’s the ultimate intention behind marriage, so when sin destroys the marriage covenant, and divorces what God never intended, it mars the picture God seeks to create in our marriages of his relationship to his people.

In fact, God demonstrates to us, as our husband and as our bridegroom, how we ought to be in our marriages. When we are faithless he is faithful, and while we were dead in sin and trespasses he sent his Son to redeem us, to purchase us for himself. This is the kind of bridegroom we have.

So when Jesus says,

English Standard Version Chapter 5

I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except on the ground of sexual immorality, makes her commit adultery, and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery.

hear his passion, and hear his zeal for marriage to be upheld, for the institution of marriage to be held in honor. Hear his righteous anger against the teaching that promotes divorce and trivializes the covenant of marriage. So my prayer for us is that we too would hold marriage in high esteem.

Prayer