Bear and Forgive

Bear With Each Other

o bear (endure) v. — to endure something unpleasant or difficult whether on one’s own behalf or on behalf of someone else.

Forbearing one another

Not only bearing one another's burdens, and with one another's weaknesses, but forbearing to render evil for evil, or railing for railing, or to seek revenge for affronts given, in whatsoever way, whether by words or deeds:

https://www.biblestudytools.com/commentaries/gills-exposition-of-the-bible/colossians-3-13.html

Three Ways To Bear With One Another.

1. Forbearing has the idea of working with those that do not have the same abilities as you.

15 Now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves. 2 Each of us is to please his neighbor for his good, to his edification.

It would be easy to get frustrated with someone that doesn't understand as well as you do on getting the job done. Sometimes we will say it is just easier for me to do it myself than to teach someone else to do it. That is probably true, but in the long run, you will never advance yourself. Share example of doing something at the bank and passing it on to someone else.

We are to be patient with a person and work with them to get them to where they understand. When something comes easy to us, we think it should come easy to everyone else. It doesn’t. Or maybe they don't have the physical capability to do what you do. Do not put them down but instead encourage them in what they can do well.

2. Forbearing also has the idea of going through a struggle in life with someone.

2 Bear one another’s burdens, and thereby fulfill the law of Christ.

This could mean grieving with someone who has just lost a loved one. Walking with someone that is struggling in some type of sin. It is easy to say I am not going to associate with them until they get their life right. The better thing to do is to help them get their life right.

Life is hard. At some point in your life you will face difficulty. There will be a time in your life that you need someone else. As the church, we are to be that someone else. Many times people look to Jesus to alleviate their suffering and fail to see that Jesus has already put someone in your life to help you through your time of difficulty. God uses us to be His hands and feet for others.

This requires the sacrifice of time. We must be willing to help the carry the burden of someone else. Not because they deserve it but because it is what Christ would do for us.

28 “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”

https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+11%3A27-30&version=NASB

3. Forbearing also has the idea of getting along with people that you don't agree with.

Therefore I, the prisoner of the Lord, implore you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling with which you have been called, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, showing tolerance for one another in love, 3 being diligent to preserve the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.

We all have opinions on certain things. You will never find someone that has the same opinion as you on everything you have an opinion on. Forbearing has a way of disagreeing with someone and yet loving them. It focuses on the relationship and not the differing opinion. Divisiveness is not conducive to forbearing. We tend to be a divisive people. Democrat & Republican, Rich & Poor, Educated & Uneducated, White and Black, Alabama & Auburn.

Why don’t we all just get along. We become so passionate about being right that we are willing to jeopardize the relationship. Use illustration of husband and wife arguing about something. You both lose!

Forgive One Another.

Forgiveness. Ceasing to feel resentment for wrongs and offenses; pardon, involving restoration of broken relationships. Primarily, forgiveness is an act of God, releasing sinners from judgment and freeing them from the divine penalty of their sin

James M. Houston, “Forgiveness,” Baker Encyclopedia of the Bible (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House, 1988), 810.

Three Steps to Complete Forgiveness

James M. Houston, “Forgiveness,” Baker Encyclopedia of the Bible (Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House, 1988), 810.

1. Cease feeling resentment toward the person that has offended you or sinned against you.

Take control of your anger. Often when we are sinned against the emotion of anger comes to the forefront of our being. We must first get rid of our anger. Good sense makes one slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an offense. Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil.

The New International Version (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011), .

The New International Version (Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2011), .

The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), .

Can you control your anger. The Bible says we can. The question is do we choose to? When we are controlled by our emotion, we are allowing the flesh to dominate our life.

Do you want to continue in your misery by constantly feeling resentment toward someone who has offended you. Give Tony Evans example about ringing the bell.

The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016), .

2. Pardon the person from their wrong doing.

Our natural response when someone hurts us is for them to hurt as much or more than we are hurting. Relinquish your right to affect punishment or revenge. No longer hold the offender guilty for their offense. Give example of debt collector. When we release the other person of their debt, we release ourselves from the pain of the offense.

19 Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,” says the Lord. 20 “But if your enemy is hungry, feed him, and if he is thirsty, give him a drink; for in so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.”

It is never our place to seek revenge on anyone. This is God’s place. Magnificent 7 example. “It is not revenge that I seek but righteousness, but if revenge is what I receive then I will accept it.”

3. Restore the relationship.

It is one thing to control your temper and pardon the person from their wrong doing. It is something much different to restore the relationship. This requires an intentional effort to have a relationship with the person that has offended you. This is a genuine sign that you have forgiven them.

If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.

We are to make every effort to live at peace with all people. However there will be times when this is not possible. Not because of your part but because of the other parties part.

What offense would warrant not reconciling the relationship? The only time that I can think that reconciliation is not doable, is when the party you want to reconcile continues to pose a threat to your safety or well-being.