Drunk man in church
A man sobering up from the night before is sitting through the Sunday
sermon, finding it long and boring. Still feeling hung over and tired, he
finally nods off.
The preacher has been watching him all along, noticing his apparent hangover
and is disgusted. At the end of the sermon, the preacher decides to make an
example of him.
He says to his congregation, "All those wishing to have a place in heaven,
The whole room stands up except, of course, the sleeping man.
Then the preacher says even more loudly, "And he who would like to find a
place in hell please STAND UP!"
The weary man catching only the last part groggily stands up, only to find
that he's the only one standing.
Confused and embarrassed he says, "I don't know what we're voting on here,
Pastor, but it sure seems like you and me are the only ones standing for