Stop The Drama #2
Stop The Drama • Sermon • Submitted
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· 71 viewsDrama. It’s all around us. Drama in politics. Drama with celebrities. Drama at work, at school, at home. But why? Why does life always seem to be so full of drama?
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Intro:
Intro:
Raise hands?
All of us...
I’m a complainer. Confession. Our culture is a culture of complaining. The more complants the more drama the less complaining the less drama.
We all agree that their is to much drama. We all agree that we need to stop it.
The number one source of drama in my life is ME/YOU.
When we understand the source, system and solution to drama we can stop the drama.
God:
Stop complaining. It is natural. The goal in my life is to complain, complain, complain… Never meet anyone.
AREAS OF COMPLAINTS
Unmet needs - my wants and wishes not being meet
Unfulfilling expectations - god given right
(Religious leaders complained against Jesus)
Unhealthy perspectives - we are opinionated and voice it. Many times we don’t have the right perspective.
Ungrateful attitudes - it is just never good enough
Complaining does not serve us well. They contribute to a life full of drama.
THE FACTS ABOUT COMPLAINING:
It is contagious - if your kids complain they caught it from somewhere
It is toxic - it will kill relationships
It is useless - it doesn’t make things better
It angers God - It is a complaint against God
It is unattractive - I’m looking for friends, where do they hang out?
It has consequences - I’m focused on the problem and not the solution. Health - people that complain about their health have more health problems. It destroys relationships.
Ill - 1911 Divorce common denominator COMPLAINING
What is complaining?
To express discontent, dissatisfaction or unhappiness. Complaint
When I’m discontent, dissatisfied or unhappy something rages inside of me. I’ve just got to get this off my chest.
Is there any hope?
Paul, in prison, gives us hope. He is in prison for doing good.
What I want to do today is I want to look at a text that to me is blow away powerful. It's written by the apostle Paul, and if there's anyone who had the right to complain, if there's anybody who had the right to complain, it was certainly the apostle Paul. The top thing on his bucket list, it was more than a bucket list, it was what he felt called to do. The number one desire of his heart was to go to Rome as a preacher, to go to Rome to communicate the gospel. He knew if he could go to Rome and reach the leaders in Rome, that he could have a chance of impacting the whole world. At the top of his list of things that he wanted to accomplish in life was to go to Rome as a preacher. Instead, he was arrested and sent to Rome as a prisoner. The dream is a preacher. Instead he is a prisoner. Not just a prisoner, but he was locked up for about two years, locked 24 hours a day, chained to different Roman guards, awaiting his very possible execution.
I'll be honest. Put me in that place. I want to go there as a preacher. I'm there as a prisoner. I'm locked up. I've been serving God. I'm going to be so tempted to complain to God. This isn't fair. Why are you allowing this to happen? I've served you. I've been faithful. If I'm the apostle Paul, I've been shipwrecked, I've been beaten, I've been snake-bitten, I've been left for dead. All I've done is serve you, serve you, serve you. You know how strategic this city is. If you just give me a shot at this city, we could make a difference here. Instead, here I am as a prisoner. The floor is hard. The food is bad. This Roman soldier's body odor is so bad it makes me want to puke even on him right now. That's kind of what would be going through my mind.
Instead of complaining, instead of whining, instead of telling God why God got it wrong, this is what the apostle Paul penned in a letter to the Christians in Philippi. Here's what he said. . Paul said this. He said to the Philippian believers, he said, "Do everything without grumbling or arguing." Another version translates it, "Do everything without complaining." Do everything without grumbling or arguing, "so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation." That is a very high standard. Whatever you do, wherever you are, and whatever deed or word, do everything without grumbling or complaining. There's a lot of very spiritual reasons why we should live without complaining. There's also a lot of practical reasons. I want to talk about the spiritual reasons, but I want to spend just a moment and talk about some of the practical reasons.
14 Do everything without grumbling or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky
14 Do everything without grumbling or arguing, 15 so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky
12 And I want you to know, my dear brothers and sisters, that everything that has happened to me here has helped to spread the Good News. 13 For everyone here, including the whole palace guard, knows that I am in chains because of Christ.
Phil 1:
Phil 1:
Do not lie, steal, lust, NO he says complaining
You want to shine? Stop The Drama of complaining. Work, school, neighborhood SHINE
HOW TO QUIT:
1. Admit the problem - turn to the person next to you… I complain to much.
13 People who conceal their sins will not prosper,
but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.
Research - the average person complains 15 to 30 times a day. Complaining is like bad breath you notice it in others.
Ill - Complaining kept the Israelites out of the promise land. You will die in your wilderness.
2. Ask god for understanding -
2 Tune your ears to wisdom,
and concentrate on understanding.
3 Cry out for insight,
and ask for understanding.
Why? Where did that come from? (5 reasons) We complain to get attention, we want to remove the responsibility, humble brag, power (build an alliance), excuses poor performance.
3. Accept responsibly - It an excuse. We lived in an entitlement age. I deserve this!
3 People ruin their lives by their own foolishness
and then are angry at the Lord.
Complaining is irresponsible.
Vent = victim - when someone vents they are playing the victim card. I don’t plan on doing anything about it.
Process = purpose - I take responsibility now what do I need to do? I will then be part of the solution.
That which you will not CONFRONT you have no right to COMPLAIN about.
4. Develop a grateful heart -
3 People ruin their lives by their own foolishness
and then are angry at the Lord.
Sign of a spiritual slip. Ungratefulness.
18 Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.
Not for but in...
5. Guard your heart -
Speak directly and only to the person who can resolve the issue.
Ill - Cold soup.
“My soup is cold and needs to be heated up.” = Facts/Confronting
“How dare you serve me cold soup?” = Feelings/Complaining
Jesus go to person
1 About that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “Who is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?”
2 Jesus called a little child to him and put the child among them. 3 Then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. 4 So anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven.
5 “And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me. 6 But if you cause one of these little ones who trusts in me to fall into sin, it would be better for you to have a large millstone tied around your neck and be drowned in the depths of the sea.
7 “What sorrow awaits the world, because it tempts people to sin. Temptations are inevitable, but what sorrow awaits the person who does the tempting. 8 So if your hand or foot causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It’s better to enter eternal life with only one hand or one foot than to be thrown into eternal fire with both of your hands and feet. 9 And if your eye causes you to sin, gouge it out and throw it away. It’s better to enter eternal life with only one eye than to have two eyes and be thrown into the fire of hell.
10 “Beware that you don’t look down on any of these little ones. For I tell you that in heaven their angels are always in the presence of my heavenly Father.
12 “If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them wanders away, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others on the hills and go out to search for the one that is lost? 13 And if he finds it, I tell you the truth, he will rejoice over it more than over the ninety-nine that didn’t wander away! 14 In the same way, it is not my heavenly Father’s will that even one of these little ones should perish.
15 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. 16 But if you are unsuccessful, take one or two others with you and go back again, so that everything you say may be confirmed by two or three witnesses. 17 If the person still refuses to listen, take your case to the church. Then if he or she won’t accept the church’s decision, treat that person as a pagan or a corrupt tax collector.
18 “I tell you the truth, whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven.
19 “I also tell you this: If two of you agree here on earth concerning anything you ask, my Father in heaven will do it for you. 20 For where two or three gather together as my followers, I am there among them.”
21 Then Peter came to him and asked, “Lord, how often should I forgive someone who sins against me? Seven times?”
22 “No, not seven times,” Jesus replied, “but seventy times seven!
23 “Therefore, the Kingdom of Heaven can be compared to a king who decided to bring his accounts up to date with servants who had borrowed money from him. 24 In the process, one of his debtors was brought in who owed him millions of dollars. 25 He couldn’t pay, so his master ordered that he be sold—along with his wife, his children, and everything he owned—to pay the debt.
26 “But the man fell down before his master and begged him, ‘Please, be patient with me, and I will pay it all.’ 27 Then his master was filled with pity for him, and he released him and forgave his debt.
28 “But when the man left the king, he went to a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars. He grabbed him by the throat and demanded instant payment.
29 “His fellow servant fell down before him and begged for a little more time. ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay it,’ he pleaded. 30 But his creditor wouldn’t wait. He had the man arrested and put in prison until the debt could be paid in full.
31 “When some of the other servants saw this, they were very upset. They went to the king and told him everything that had happened. 32 Then the king called in the man he had forgiven and said, ‘You evil servant! I forgave you that tremendous debt because you pleaded with me. 33 Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’ 34 Then the angry king sent the man to prison to be tortured until he had paid his entire debt.
35 “That’s what my heavenly Father will do to you if you refuse to forgive your brothers and sisters from your heart.”
29 Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.
Proverbs 4:29
6. Tell God and trust Him -
1 I cry out to the Lord;
I plead for the Lord’s mercy.
2 I pour out my complaints before him
and tell him all my troubles.
6 Hear my cry,
for I am very low.
Rescue me from my persecutors,
for they are too strong for me.
When we stop complaining the drama will be reduced.
Questions:
When you're around others who begin to complain, are you eager to join in?
Do you frequently “vent”?
Do others see you as a negative person or a positive person?
Do you find yourself complaining about things that you are allowing?
Are you more likely to say what’s wrong or to get involved with a solution?
Do you complain more than you compliment?
Let’s stop the drama!
When I think about complaining in the Bible, the very first place my mind goes is back to the Old Testament, to think about God's chosen people, the Israelites, who, when they were in captivity as slaves for hundreds of years complained, complained, complained, complained. Then when God did miracle after miracle after miracle ... He issued ten different miraculous plagues to turn the heart of Pharaoh. He parted the Red Sea. He drowned Pharaoh's army. He fed God's people with bread from heaven, water from rocks. Their clothes never ever ran out. What did God's people do? They griped, they whined, and they continued to complain. In fact, it's almost comical to me how much their mindset looked like my family in the middle of London.
In verse 11, when they said to Moses, "Was it because there were no graves in Egypt that you brought us to the desert to die? What have you done to us by bringing us out of Egypt? We were so happy when we were slaves, but now you've brought us out of there. Didn't we say to you in Egypt, 'Leave us alone. Let us serve the Egyptians.' It would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians and then die in the desert." Sounds so much like so many of us. To add insult to injury, Moses said something that should probably stun you into a moment of silence. He said this about our complaining. He said, "You're not grumbling against us." Who were they complaining against? They were complaining against the Lord. Imagine if every time that we complain, it's not just about our circumstances or about the traffic or about another person, but what if in God's eyes, we were actually complaining about him? Perhaps that is the way he sees it.
I want to go ahead and just clarify this and hope that you'll understand that the problem is not the weather. The problem is not the traffic. The problem is not that Netflix hasn't come out with new original content that meets your approval rating. The problem is that we've taken our eyes off of the goodness of God and we've placed our eyes dead center on ourselves. That is the problem that leads to a constant curse of complaining.
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· If you can change your circumstances—Do something about it.
This was the problem with the Israelites. They were negative when they were in captivity. They were negative when they were free because their negative mindset trained them to be even more negative and this is incredibly dangerous. I don't know about you, but I don't want to go through life preconceived to find the bad, when there's already enough bad in the world. I want to train my mind to find that which is good, that which is pleasant, and that which is helpful and hopeful, instead of always focusing on what's negative. When you look at the apostle Paul, the way he lived and what he taught, would communicate these two big ideas. To me, this is the heart of the message, and then I want to unpack it in a way that hopefully will motivate and speak to you in a very powerful way.
· If you can’t change your circumstances—Change your perspective.
Then, by his teaching, he would say this. He would say, "If you can't change your circumstances, then change your perspective." If you can do something about it, do something about it. If you can't change your circumstances, then change your perspective. Change what you say about it. Change how you think about it. Change what you see in those circumstances. This, to me, is so powerful, what he says in . If you remember, he's chained to a Roman soldier. He's awaiting his very possible execution. His dream was to preach the gospel and he's locked up in prison. This is what he says. He says, "But even if ... " I love that phrase. "But even if I'm being poured out like a drink offering on the sacrifice and service coming from your faith, I am glad and rejoice with all of you. So you too should be glad and rejoice with me." Even if I'm being poured out like a drink offering, I am still glad.
What was he saying? He was saying, "You think that I'm the prisoner here? Let me tell you who the real prisoner is. Every eight hours, I get fresh meat, virgin ears. I get someone new. One of the most powerful people in all of Rome chained up to my arm for an eight hour sermon that I write new for each and every one. You think I'm the prisoner here? You've got no idea how God is using what others would see as negative to advance the gospel." In other words, this isn't my plan. This isn't what I would have chosen. There's a lot of reasons why I would probably complain about this, but because I can't change my circumstance, I am changing my perspective. I know that my God works in all things to bring about good according to his purpose to those who love him and are called by his power. I see my God doing something. I don't know who this is going to speak to, but if you're in a place you don't like, you recognize God still has a plan. God still has a purpose. God still has an assignment. It may not be what you'd choose. It may not be what you ever want. It may be the last thing that you would choose. It doesn't mean God can't use it to get the message of his goodness being pushed forward.
Think about it. Paul is chained to a Roman soldier 24 hours a day. I would ask you this. What are you chained to? What are you chained to? Don't say my husband, but maybe it is a very painful relationship. Maybe it's a job situation that you don't know what you're going to do. It could be you're chained to a financial problem. You're in the middle of a hole that you don't know how you're going to get out of. It could be a health issue. The list could go on and on. Let me just say this to you. If you can do something about it, do something about it. If you can bring your A game, bring your A game. If you can pray, pray. If you can work hard, work hard. If you can get counseling, get counseling. If you can seek help, seek some help. If you can get wisdom, get wisdom. If you can turn over a new leaf, turn over ... If you can do something about it, do something about it. If you can't change your circumstance though, change your perspective. Change the way you look at it. Change the way you think about it. Change the words that you speak about it. Rather than complaining about something you cannot change, choose to see God's presence and his power, even in the middle of something you would have never ever asked for.
I love the phrase Paul uses. "Even if". So powerful. "Even if." Even if at this moment I'm being poured out. Even if my life is oozing away. Even if everything that I've wanted to accomplish never comes to pass. Even if I've only got days left on this earth, he says, "Yet I will rejoice." Why? Because in the middle of this thing I never would have asked for, I can see a glimpse of the goodness of God. He's still using me. He's still in me. He's still working through me. He is still good, even though I would have never asked for this.
How do you do it? Just recognize this. You are not the center of the story. When Jesus is the center of your story, it changes how you let your story be told.
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11 and they said to Moses, “Why did you bring us out here to die in the wilderness? Weren’t there enough graves for us in Egypt? What have you done to us? Why did you make us leave Egypt? 12 Didn’t we tell you this would happen while we were still in Egypt? We said, ‘Leave us alone! Let us be slaves to the Egyptians. It’s better to be a slave in Egypt than a corpse in the wilderness!’ ”
Exodus
8 Then Moses added, “The Lord will give you meat to eat in the evening and bread to satisfy you in the morning, for he has heard all your complaints against him. What have we done? Yes, your complaints are against the Lord, not against us.”