Biblical Marriage 1

18 Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” 19 Now out of the ground the Lord God had formed every beast of the field and every bird of the heavens and brought them to the man to see what he would call them. And whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. 20 The man gave names to all livestock and to the birds of the heavens and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper fit for him. 21 So the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the Lord God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, “This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

It was started by God.

Gen 2.18

Perfect

loving

kind

merciful

it was started before the fall Genesis 1-2

Adam was totally uninvolved in the institution of marriage.

Gen 2:21

Since it was Gods design and not mans...

it must conform to His expressed will and not mans

man is not free to redefine, denigrate, or abandon it

It is continuously exalted in Scripture.

Gen 2.22-23

Proverbs 12.4, 18.22, 31.10-12

1 Corinthians 7

Hebrews 13.4

Ephesians 5

When you think about marriage as positive you will talk about it as positive!

Luke 6.45

Picture

Marriage is a Picture.

Ephesians 5:22–33 ESV

22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. 25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Eph 5:32

The husband is to portray Christ

By:

as head he is to be most responsible [5.23]

as servant, he is to be most sacrificial [5.23]

as lover, he is to be most giving [5.25]

immediate needs [5.26]

long term goals [5.27]

encouraging reciprocal love [5.28-30]

The wife is to portray the Church

By:

submitting to the leadership of her husband [5.22]

respecting her husband [5.33]

loving her husband [Titus 2.4]

Therefore divorce and the things that lead to is destroy the picture. Avoid it!

Even if married to an unbeliever

Progressive

Marriage is progressive.

Genesis 2:24 ESV

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.

Leaving

Does Not Mean:

This does not mean to abandon or forsake ones parents.

Neither does it demand a geographical move.

1 Tim 5.8

This Does Mean:

settle past conflict

recognizing the “TPT” principle

making your marriage partner the primary human relationship

assuming financial responsibility

Cleaving

Means to “weld together”

The basis of marriage is commitment, not love.

God views this commitment as very important.

Malachi 2:10–16; Matthew 19:3–9

Weaving

God intended marriage to defeat loneliness.

God wants you and your spouse to function as a team.

[achieved by]

the same goals

the same motives

continual communication

personal growth

a bit of creativity

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Biblical Principles of Sex

Three important reasons for studying the subject of sex.

Our culture endorses a wrong view of sex and sexual relations.

Many believers have been influenced toward unbiblical views of sex.

God’s Word speaks often about the right and wrong view of sex and sexual relations.

Sex Quiz

True or False

Sex should be part of discussions about gospel centered living? T/F

God intended sex to be fun, satisfying, and desirable for the husband and the wife? T/F

It’s ok to make excuses in order to avoid sexual relations with your spouse? T/F

Selfishness in sexual relations is forbidden by scripture? T/F

Women should not initiate sexual relations? T/F

Whatever is mutually enjoyable and fulfilling to the couple and does not violate biblical principals is proper in the context of the bedroom? T/F

Having sexual relations that are pleasing to God is highly dependent on the overall marital relationship? T/F

Biblical truths regarding sex.

The creation story explains that sex is a gift from God.

According to Genesis, there was something wonderful about two genders of male and female in the mind of God. Man and woman were to be closely joined together. Therefore:

Sex was designed as a means of procreation; the very means by which mankind would carry out the commands to “be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth.” Gen 1:26-29

Sex was designed as a relational concept as a part of companionship. Gen 2:18-25

Sex, enjoyed within the biblical guidelines, brings glory to God.

1 Corinthians 10:31 ESV

31 So, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.

A biblical worldview will include the belief that sex;

was created by God

is encouraged by God

and ultimately brings God glory when enjoyed by a husband and a wife within the bonds of covenant marriage.

Therefore, our conversations about sex must include the positive values that God designed in addition to the more commonly discussed condemnation for ungodly substitutions.

Sex is a duty for both spouses with an emphasis on giving.

1 Corinthians 7:2–4 ESV

2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

What we see here is:

Each person has a duty to fulfill. [3]

The focus on the duty is on giving to the other person. [3]

The husband and the wife have equal authority over their spouse’s bodies. [4]

Not self seeking.

Seek to serve.

The three concepts of duty, authority, and giving are very important. Questions…?

Intended for Pleasure by Ed Wheat

Application of these Biblical teachings.

Scripture opposes self centeredness in our relations.

Scripture opposes any type of premarital sexual contact.

Scripture opposes pornography.

Scripture opposes homosexuality.

Sex should be enjoyed regularly in marriage with breaks only for prayer.

1 Corinthians 7:5 ESV

5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

Four biblical guidelines from this passage for refraining from sexual relations.

There is mutual consent.

There is a predetermined and prearranged period of refraining.

There is a goal and a focus on one’s prayers.

The period of refraining is terminated by sexual relations.

Wise principles for how frequent a husband and wife should engage each other.

Enough to keep each other satisfied.

Enough to avoid temptation.

Sex should be celebrated and passionate.

When it is we will experience...

Satisfaction in ones own spouse. [Prov. 5.15-19]

A husbands passionate pursuit of his wife. [SOS 7.1-9]

A wife’s passionate pursuit of her husband. [SOS 5.10-16]

Attitudes that these biblical truths correct:

Taboos

Perversions

Possible challenges related to accomplish these steps:

Media

Past events

Steps to help us implement these biblical principles.

Husbands

Regularly communicate with your wife.

Seek to romance your wife and make her feel special. [Date her, Woo her]

Provide and be concerned about her interests. [both in the bedroom and out of it]

Be the spiritual leader in your home.

Resources:

Exemplary Husband - Stuart Scott

Intended for Pleasure - Ed Wheat

Wives

Seek to grow in your love for your husband because of your love for Christ.

Seek to be attractive to your husband.

Be available rather than make excuses.

Pursue your husband rather than simply waiting to be pursued.

Resources:

Feminine Appeal - Carolyn Mahaney

Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God - Carolyn Mahaney

Creative Counterpart - Linda Dillow

Excellent Wife - Martha Peace

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