Untitled Sermon (4)

Abiy + Sheri-Ann Wedding Notes

Notes for the Rehearsal:

Tape for the wedding party’s spots.Groomsmen cross hands or put them at your sides. Wedding party always faces the bride. If the ring falls, I will pick it up. If the ring gives you trouble (because of nerves), let them adjust it.

Procession

(Come Thou Fount — Kings Kaleidoscope)

Officiant & Groom

Family

Wedding Party

(Great is Thy Faithfulness — Lucius)

Flower Girl

Bride Entrance

motion to stand / “please stand”

Welcome / Prayer

We’re here this evening to witness and to celebrate the joining of Abiy Markos Kaltiso and Sheri-Ann Olivia Peckham in marriage. No better way to begin than to thank the Creator and Sustainer of marriage. Please pray with me.

Heavenly Father, Creator of the Universe and giver of all grace and every good thing, we thank you for giving us life and for giving us the opportunity to share in the joy of Abiy and Sheri-Ann’s wedding. Be honored by this ceremony, celebration, and union of these two. Jesus, they want to serve and reflect you well with their marriage. Help them. We love you, Lord. Amen.

Declaration of Intent

You may be seated.

Before we begin, I want to ask each of you a question:

Abiy,

Do you accept God's gracious gift of Sheri-Ann as your wife, promising to give yourself to her completely and to grow with her in oneness according to God's design and by His Spirit?

Abiy: “I do.”

Sheri-Ann,

Do you accept God's gracious gift of Abiy as your husband, promising to give yourself to him completely and to grow with him in oneness according to God's design and by His Spirit?

Sheri-Ann: “I do.”

Giving Away of the Bride

Who gives this woman to be married to this man?

Father: “Her mother and I (do).”

Scripture Reading

( — Tsedenia Tewodros)

Charge

Nervous?

Don’t worry, it’s my first time, too.

Abiy, dapper. Sheri-Ann, beautiful. Y’all aren’t the only ones who look good.

Take a second to look around and take it all in. See your people. Cherish this moment.

For those of you who are here and don’t know one of these two, I want to fill you in a bit.

Asked each of them a few questions.

1. What was the first thing that got your attention about them?

Abiy

Her soft freckles

Sheri-Ann

- How great he was with people!

- He had this like-able personality that people were drawn to.

- He seemed very approachable, down-to-earth, had great conversation and told THE funniest and most clever jokes.

2. When did you know for sure you wanted to marry them?

Abiy

The first time she groomed my beard and used tweezers to pluck my ingrown hairs. That's love. After that I knew I had to wife her.

Sheri-Ann

Too many to count.

The first time I went to Jamaica after we started dating, cried. It was like he felt more like "home" to me than Jamaica which was a HUGE deal. I made him really mad. He was so patient with me. I knew he’d be a great husband/father.

3. What was a funny or embarrassing moment y’all shared?

Sheri-Ann

I came to Abiy's Halloween house party dressed as Penny Proud and he was on the porch. He asked me if I was there for the party or to trick-or-treat.

Abiy

She came to a halloween party at my house. She walked up to the door with her lil freckles and Penny Proud costume and since I didn't recognize her. I asked if she was here for the party or was a trick or treater. She wasn't amused.

4. As of RIGHT NOW, what characteristic do they have that you are most thankful to have in a spouse?

Sheri-Ann

God-fearing, great leadership qualities and great problem-solving skills.

Abiy

Her consistent long-suffering and compassion to walk with me as I've had to face my deepest fears, pains, and struggles. 

Isn’t that insightful? And so beautiful.

As someone who’s been married a year and a half, I haven’t learned or gone through as much as some here, but I’ve learned and gone through some things. I’ve learned that life happens after the wedding. You both have been very mindful of that along the way.

Today is an event. It’s your leaving and cleaving, to become one flesh. You’ve done so much planning to get ready for today, and from our conversations it has sounded like you’ve felt the tension of remembering to prepare for a marriage, not just prepare for a wedding.

Truth is, the fun of today will end. You’ll drive away from here and begin your life. You’ll have all the fun together. You will become more intimate and more comfortable with each other. The depths of your sin will surface more and more. You will be tempted to grow impatient with each other. You’ll find things to nitpick…develop a regular fight. You both obviously value diversity, but you will be tempted to change the other person…to talk like you, act like you, be like you.

Marriage is about reflecting Jesus, husband and wife serve each other, so that both of them flourish, so that they better serve the Church and the world to see them flourish. Unfortunately, sometimes we let being married get in the way of the purpose of their marriage.

You will feel this, too. What will you turn to, to remind you of the purpose of your marriage? Self-care in order to be the best you? 5 quick steps to making your marriage better?

A lot of things in the world will tell you to work on yourself or focus on yourself, because marriage is about you. As you’ve both learned, living for yourself isn’t rewarding or sustainable.

Three simple things to remember about God and marriage that might help. First,…

Marriage is a gift from God.

In the first few pages of the Bible, in Genesis, God created the first man, Adam. He commanded Adam to be fruitful and multiply, the purpose of which was to spread God’s image bearers all over the world. Adam couldn’t fulfill this mission on His own, so God gave Him Eve. God also gave her as a result of Adam’s “being alone.” Everything God made He said was good, the only thing that fell short of this “goodness” was Adam being without a helper, a partner, a companion.

I’ll get back to the aspect of mission in a second, but God gave marriage to Adam simply as a gift. He sang to his wife the first time he saw he: ABIY. Both of you are floating and deep down you’re singing, just like Adam. You’re reflecting that marriage is a gift to those who receive it.

Ephesians tells us Christ created the Church, the most beautiful, diverse, and unified group of people on the planet. He made a rich community and gives this gift to all who follow Him. You have each enjoyed and benefited from being joined to this body. Now, you are covenanting with another human in the most intimate relationship God has created. You are each receiving a lifelong friend and companion, partner and teammate, servant and shepherd, confidant and refuge. God has given you Sheri-Ann and you Abiy to point each of you back to Himself, His grace, His kindness and care, and His provision for you. Marriage is a gift from God.

[Transition]:

Not only do you receive these things from God, you become them. You’ll each be these things for your spouse, too. So,…

Marriage is a gift to your spouse.

Ephesians also offers a rather large instruction for married folks. Paul described the unity of the Church and told them how to fight for it, to attain it, to keep it, to kindle it. He even zoomed in to do the same for husbands and wives. The interesting thing is how he encourages each party to give themselves to the other. There is no taking care of yourself. Jesus’ care-taking is implied.

If both of you trust Jesus will care for you while you obey His command to serve and give yourself to and for your spouse, neither of you will be able to deny—for long at least—the gift marriage is to your spouse. And know this…if you only hear one thing, hear this. When the worst parts of you surface and you see God’s grace growing and empowering your spouse to continue loving and serving you, you’ll know marriage is a gift for you. You may not believe it’s a gift to your spouse, but God will use the worst parts of you to deal with the worst parts of them.

Marriage won’t always feel good to you, but it will always be good for you. And the hard times in marriage make the sweet times infinitely richer.

[Transition]:

Marriage isn’t lived in a vacuum, though. It’s lived in the context of Jesus’ Church. It happens among neighbors, coworkers, family members, and others. So,…

Marriage is a gift to the Church and the world.

God gave Adam a mission to multiply, spreading God’s image bearers all over the world. Today, God gives us a different Helper in the Spirit for a similar mission in disciple-making. That does not negate the gift marriage is in furthering the cause of Christ. My wife and I fight to multiply our gifts and ministry. When we have children, adopt, foster, love our neighbors, open our home, potentially plant a church, and the copious other ways in which we serve in the world, we are doing more ministry together than we could have done on our own. I’m in seminary in Dallas and I couldn’t live without my wife. This woman is laying herself down for me, for Jesus, and that helps both of us to continue serving our church and our neighbors.

Many people are allowing their marriage to inform the mission instead of the mission informing their marriage. They allow their wants, dreams, and resources to determine their lives. Y’all have said you want to surrender all of yourselves, including your marriage, to Jesus. When you’re both giving your lives to Jesus, you will gradually and continually give your life to others and for the mission. You will reflect submission and sacrifice, and you will reflect Jesus. God will use your marriage for the sake of the Church’s growth and for the cause of making disciples.

When your life is given to God’s Church and mission, petty arguments seem less important. Fighting over towels, piles of clothes, the trash, which restaurant to try on date night…everything seems to be seen more appropriately.

1. It will be easier to love and serve each other, even when you don’t feel like it.

2. You will remember you are teammates.

When problems surface, it is you both against the issue, not each other.

3. You will fight for the diversity and individuality of your spouse,

because you need their gifts and differences to faithfully serve others.

[Transition]:

In conclusion,

Conclusion

your marriage is a gift from God, so it exists for God.

your marriage is a gift for your spouse, so it exists for your spouse.

your marriage is a gift to God’s Church and world, so it exists for God’s mission.

If you focus on these things,

your marriage will be really great for you.

you’ll be extremely satisfied. not always feeling happy, but deeply grateful and matured.

You will both flourish,

you will both benefit the flourishing of those around you,

and God will be glorified.

Remember these, because knowing Marriage is…

God’s gift to you will help you to be grateful.

God’s gift to your spouse will help you to be sacrificial.

God’s gift to the Church and the mission will help you to live for what is eternal.

[Transition]:

With this in mind, are each of you ready for the VOW EXCHANGE?

Exchange of Vows

The Bride and Groom crafted these vows as an act of unity.

[Face one another…Abiy repeat after me.]

Abiy:

I, Abiy Kaltiso, // take you, Sheri-Ann Peckham, // to be my wife, // to have and to hold, from this day forward, // for better, for worse, // for richer, for poorer, // in sickness and in health, // to love and to cherish, // till death do us part, // according to God's holy ordinance; // I pledge myself to you.

I vow to walk with humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with you in love and eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. I vow to love you as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. I vow to love you as my own body - nourish and cherish you. I vow to be faithful to you and to rejoice in you. I vow to be understanding, showing honor to you as a co-heir in the grace of life. I vow to be patient and kind, not arrogant or rude, not irritable or resentful, ever rejoicing with the truth. I vow to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. I vow to forgive you always as God forgives us, and keep no record of wrong. I vow to commit my will to your needs and best interests regardless of the cost. I vow to encourage and challenge you, accept you and show you grace. I vow to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus, to follow Him, and to use our marriage to witness to the world for His glory.

[Face one another…Sheri-Ann repeat after me.]

Sheri-Ann: I, Sheri-Ann Peckham, // take you, Abiy Kaltiso, // to be my husband, // to have and to hold, from this day forward, // for better, for worse, // for richer, for poorer, // in sickness and in health, // to love and to cherish, // till death do us part, // according to God's holy ordinance; // I pledge myself to you.

I vow to walk with humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with you in love and eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. I vow to respect and honor you. I vow to be faithful to you and to rejoice in you. I vow to submit to you, with love and pure conduct.

I vow to adorn my heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle spirit, which is precious in God’s sight. I vow to be patient and kind, not arrogant or rude, not irritable or resentful, ever rejoicing with the truth. I vow to be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger. I vow to forgive you always as God forgives us, and keep no record of wrong. I vow to commit my will to your needs and best interests regardless of the cost. I vow to encourage and challenge you, accept you and show you grace. I vow to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus, to follow Him, and to use our marriage to witness to the world for His glory.

[Transition]:

Every covenant has a sign to remind each party of their responsibility.

Do you have the RINGS?

Exchange of Rings

These rings are symbols of your love for one another and commitment to one another. They are visible reminders to you and all witnesses, that what you have promised, you will do.

[Transition]:

Abiy take Sheri-Ann’s hand, place the ring on her finger, and repeat after me:

With this ring, I pledge to you //

all that I am and all that I have //

until we are separated by death. //

In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

[Transition]:

Sheri-Ann take Abiy’s hand, place the ring on his finger, and repeat after me:

With this ring, I pledge to you //

all that I am and all that I have //

until we are separated by death. //

In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

[Transition]:

As Abiy + Sheri-Ann begin their journey as a married couple, they will be commemorating the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus by taking communion. It is a sign of their commitment to loving and serving Jesus as a unit for the rest of their days.

Communion / Worship

(You’re Beautiful — Lucius)

Pronouncement of Marriage + Kiss

I pray God reminds you constantly of His approval of you and of your union in Christ, and that this reality will fuel your continual laying down of yourselves in service to your Savior, your spouse, and the world. I’m excited to watch how God will continue to use you both to build His Church.

By the authority given to me as a minister of the gospel of Jesus Christ,

I now pronounce you husband and wife.

Abiy, you may kiss your bride.

(Get the flowers)

It is my privilege to present to you for the first time

Mr. and Mrs. Abiy + Sheri-Ann Kaltiso!

Recessional

(Never Letting Go — Wayne Wonder)

Abiy + Sheri-Ann

Wedding Party

Announcements

Thanks: Abiy + Sheri-Ann with their families are so honored you’re here. They want to celebrate with you! So…

Guests: Cocktail Hour in the Ballroom Family: Pictures