Family 5

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We all have a family. We can't aviod them. So we might as well figure out how to live with them. We all want great families. Of course, it's easier said then done… and everyone has an opinion. Culture media, and even other families try to tell us who we should be and how we shoud do it. With so many voices attempting to shape our values, it can be difficult to stay on course and raise famiies that relflect what's most important to us. Whether you're a mom or a dad, a son or a daughter, aunt or uncle, gandma or grandpa, this series will help us all make sure that the people in our lives we call family are well-loved and well-led.

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Intro:

Me - What comes to your mind when you hear the word mercy? Little league - mercy rule. Weak. We have grown up with the understanding that mercy is for the weak and the soft.
Mercy is for the courageous and the strong. All of use need a good dose of mercy.
We can not make it without mercy in our relationships.
Quiz On Mercy
When those I love get some details wrong while telling a story, do I...
… interrupt them and correct them publicly?
OR
… say nothing and let it go, knowing I’ve done the same?
When those I love keeps making the same mistage over and over do I...
… become inrritated and angry with them?
OR
… graciously forgive them and pray for them?
When those I love says or does something I don’t understand, do I...
… assume they have the best motivation for doing it>
OR
… question their motivation or think the worst?
It is hard to be merciful.
Am I more polite with strangers OR the ones I love?
Flunked it. We all need mercy because we are imperfect and live among imperfect people.
(Background)
Matthew 5:7 NLT
7 God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
This text is not saying… if I’m merciful to other people then they will be merciful back to me. i.e. Jesus
Ultimately we will be blesed by God and His mercy.
God’s character = Mercy
What is mercy?
Ephesians 2:4–5 NLT
4 But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, 5 that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!)
Hebrews 4:16 NLT
16 So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most.
God is rich. Love and mercy are cousins.
God gives us what we did not deserve. MERCY. We receive it and now we need to give it.
It is impossible to have relationships without being troubled by the troubles of others.
Ill - marriage troubles, kid troubles
“Mercy is my commitment to live alongside of you in this broken world even though I will suffer with you, for you, and because of you. I will do everything I can to relieve your distress.” - Paul Tripp
Don’t enter a relationship unless you are willing to extend large doses of mercy. Marriage, life group, church
Mercy means...
… you expect suffering in your relationships and are willing to endure it. EXPECT
… you are willing to live with flawed people.
… you resist to temptation to show favoritism.
… you are committed to persevere in hardship.
… you reject a “personal happiness” agenda.
.... you live with a commitment to forgive.
… you overlook minor offensives.
… you do not compromise what is morally right and true. (arg - God’s mercy is what convicts us)
How can we live this out in a practical way?
Mercy...
Is an act of the will - not feeling. You can’t wait to you feel like it.
Luke 6:36 NIV
36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
L
Mercy is a decision that is backed up by my committed actions.
2. Doesn’t judge it help. - mercy doesn’t point a finger they extend a hand. You’ve made your bed now lie in it. You are getting what you deserver. Mercy doesn’t judge it helps.
Proverbs 13:15 NLT
15 A person with good sense is respected; a treacherous person is headed for destruction.
3. Does not overlook wrong. - Not compromise. Walk with them through consequences.
Matthew 18:15 NLT
15 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.
you don’t overlook it. You become resentful, angry and bitter. Mercy deals with it.
Mercy is not about calling wrong right because if wrong were right, mercy would not be needed.
If you overlook wrong you don’t love them. Are you ok with someone correcting you? I’m not for sure that is right.
4. Extends compassion, forgiveness and patience. - Don’t go in with a club but compassion. Willing to come alongside of you.
Colossians 3:13 NLT
13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
The Lord forgave me so I must forgive others.
Why should I be merciful?
God has shown me mercy.
Matthew 18:33 NLT
33 Shouldn’t you have mercy on your fellow servant, just as I had mercy on you?’
2. God commands me to be merciful.
Hosea 6:6 NIV
6 For I desire mercy, not sacrifice, and acknowledgment of God rather than burnt offerings.
3. I am going to need mercy.
James 2:13 NLT
13 There will be no mercy for those who have not shown mercy to others. But if you have been merciful, God will be merciful when he judges you.
4. Mercy brings happiness.
Matthew 5:7 NLT
7 God blesses those who are merciful, for they will be shown mercy.
Our primary calling as a parent or friend is not first to represent God’s judgement, but rather to constantly deliver His mercy.
Psalms
(Hosea mercy story)
Mercy Killers:
Psalm 101:2 NIV
2 I will be careful to lead a blameless life— when will you come to me? I will conduct the affairs of my house with a blameless heart.
Unclear boundaries
Boundary: What is okay and what is no okay. (if you fight over the same things you have no boundaries)
Inconsistent discipline
Unbalanced correction - never notice the good. ie. never full but empty
Unreasonable demands - patient, mercy is unconvient
Unspoken expectations - people can’t read your mind
Undeserved or resolved anger - deal with it
Conc:
If you are going to take your relationships to a whole new level it has to include huge merits of mercy.
Do you need to ask God for mercy? - you can’t give out until you take in.
To whom do you need to extend mercy? Husband, coworker, oldest.
Prayer - I need your mercy. Help us not to forget how kind, loving and gentle you are towards me.
Psalm 32:1–11 NLT
1 Oh, what joy for those whose disobedience is forgiven, whose sin is put out of sight! 2 Yes, what joy for those whose record the Lord has cleared of guilt, whose lives are lived in complete honesty! 3 When I refused to confess my sin, my body wasted away, and I groaned all day long. 4 Day and night your hand of discipline was heavy on me. My strength evaporated like water in the summer heat. Interlude 5 Finally, I confessed all my sins to you and stopped trying to hide my guilt. I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.” And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone. Interlude 6 Therefore, let all the godly pray to you while there is still time, that they may not drown in the floodwaters of judgment. 7 For you are my hiding place; you protect me from trouble. You surround me with songs of victory. Interlude 8 The Lord says, “I will guide you along the best pathway for your life. I will advise you and watch over you. 9 Do not be like a senseless horse or mule that needs a bit and bridle to keep it under control.” 10 Many sorrows come to the wicked, but unfailing love surrounds those who trust the Lord. 11 So rejoice in the Lord and be glad, all you who obey him! Shout for joy, all you whose hearts are pure!
=11

Hosea and Gomer: An Unlikely Love Story

Hosea (not Hosear!) was a preacher—a prophet, really—who lived at a time when religious folks didn't want to hear his message. The Israelites were more interested in worshiping idols than worshiping Jehovah. They were, as the hymn writer put it, "Prone to wander ... prone to leave the God I love."
One day, God told Hosea his bachelor days were up. The problem with the wedding announcement was it came with a dreadful prophecy.
His wife would break his heart. Aware of Gomer's promiscuous reputation, Hosea humbled himself in obedience to the Lord.
As a godly man, he surely had different hopes for marriage—those of pursuing a lover who would share not only his heart but also his faith and convictions.

Hosea Hears Rumors

How many times had he dreamed of late night talks, stolen kisses in the courtyard and holding hands as he drifted off to sleep beside the one with whom he longed to build his future? Instead, he awakened from his marriage vows to emptiness and abandonment. The Bible doesn't say when or how; all we know is that it did happen.
But Hosea began to hear rumors. And his heart began to break.
His beloved was going off with other men. He couldn't even be sure the children she bore were his. Hosea—a broken-hearted father, a betrayed husband and a bewildered preacher—felt like his fragile heart would never recover.
And, then, the final blow ... Gomer's wanderings had drawn her into the wrong company.

Hosea Does the Unthinkable

God told Hosea to do the unthinkable—to go redeem his wife. Gomer was being sold as a slave. Hosea must have cried out to God, "She's thrown my love away. Why should I have to buy back what is already mine?"
Hosea was a faithful husband; Gomer was an unfaithful wife. God is the faithful lover of our souls. We are often faithless, prone to wander.
Hosea and Gomer's story is the story of God and Israel. It is also our story. When we, like Gomer, were enslaved, God bought us back. When we found ourselves stuck in chains we never intended—chains of insecurity, discontentment or fear—God freed us.
When we, by our very nature, threw God's love away, He redeemed us.

God's Unconditional Love and Act of Redemption

When Hosea bought Gomer back, when he redeemed her, he did so with 15 shekels of silver and 5 bushels of barley (). When God redeemed us, He paid the ultimate price with the blood of His Son (, ).
Gomer did not deserve to be redeemed. Her behavior did not merit such mercy. Israel did not deserve God's faithful betrothal. Their unfaithfulness did not merit such mercy. You and I do not deserve salvation. Our sin does not merit such mercy.
Why did God redeem you?Why did Jesus pay the ultimate price for your redemption?Why does God continue to give His unconditional love to a people who continually throw it away?
It's not because we deserve it; it's because His mercy demands it. Aren't you glad God does not treat us as our sin deserves? () God chose you and loves you. This love story is your story. Even if you are faithless, He will remain faithful.
If you are enslaved, God will buy you back.If you are lost, God will find you.If you are ashamed, God will cover you.If you wander off, God will bring you home.If you give up on Him, God will not give up on you.No matter where you are, God sees who you are, and He loves you.
Through the story of Hosea, God tenderly touches your arm and whispers, "Come home. My love sets you free. When you get tired of striving and wandering, I'll be there to draw you to Myself again and remind you who you are in Christ."

How Your Story Connects with Hosea's

That's the message of the whole Bible, isn't it?At a manger in Bethlehem, God entered the slave market where all of us were putting ourselves up for auction, prostituting ourselves and our humanity to a lesser life. But on the cross, Jesus paid the full price for our freedom.
He bought us back.
This is the scandal of God's love—His loving desire to make us His people and the full persons He intended us to be.
God's response to you is the same as it was to Israel. He will heal your faithlessness. He will love you freely. God has written on your very life the words I love you. He values you so much that He enters into covenant with you, redeems you and remains faithful to you.
May we never carelessly throw away what cost God so much. Oh, what love!
Hosea 3:2 NLT
2 So I bought her back for fifteen pieces of silver and five bushels of barley and a measure of wine.
1 Peter 1:18–19 NLT
18 For you know that God paid a ransom to save you from the empty life you inherited from your ancestors. And it was not paid with mere gold or silver, which lose their value. 19 It was the precious blood of Christ, the sinless, spotless Lamb of God.
Psalm 103:10 NLT
10 He does not punish us for all our sins; he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve.
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