I'm Hurt/Offended. Now What?
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Luke 17:
1 He said to His disciples, “Offenses will certainly come, but woe to the one they come through!
It’s not blow up.
It’s not blow up.
Boudreaux joke about dynamite… three lefts make a right
Go do what God called you to do … build the wall like Nehimiah but don’t go down and handle all the issues.
19 Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord.
What do you mean leave room for God?
19 Don’t insist on getting even; that’s not for you to do. “I’ll do the judging,” says God. “I’ll take care of it.”
When we decide to take revenge ourselves, we squeeze God out.
It’s not guess what.
It’s not guess what.
Gossip...
The church is the worst place in the world for this. We gossip and sow chords of discord...
That’s not God’s way...
28 A perverse man stirs up dissension,
and a gossip separates close friends.
Gossip - same Hebrew word used in Exodus when the Israelites were murmuring and complaining… can you believe what Moses is doing? Can you believe what these kids are doing… did you see...
15 “If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.
Privately - not in publically
Matt 18:15
It’s not so what.
It’s not so what.
You kind of minimize it… it’s not that big of a deal.
When we minimize the hurt, it minimizes forgiveness. Forgivness came at a huge price
14 My people are broken—shattered!—
and they put on Band-Aids,
Saying, ‘It’s not so bad. You’ll be just fine.’
But things are not ‘just fine’!
ILL - wash hands .... purell
When people do things to hurt us, it attaches to our hearts. Jesus is our spiritual purell
15 Look after each other so that not one of you will fail to find God’s best blessings. Watch out that no bitterness takes root among you, for as it springs up it causes deep trouble, hurting many in their spiritual lives.
Heb
We need some spiritual detoxification.
God’s Way of Handling Our Hurts
God’s Way of Handling Our Hurts
1. Realize that it affects my relationship with God.
1. Realize that it affects my relationship with God.
How many of you have ever done or said something that hurt someone? Is there anyone who is sitting next to someone who has ever hurt someone?
We judge ourselves by our motives, but we judge others by their actions. We do something and go… that’s not what I meant… I didn’t mean for that to happen and we let ourself off the hook. Someone else does something and we rail on about how they should not have done that.
37 “Do not judge others, and God will not judge you; do not condemn others, and God will not condemn you; forgive others, and God will forgive you. 38 Give to others, and God will give to you. Indeed, you will receive a full measure, a generous helping, poured into your hands—all that you can hold. The measure you use for others is the one that God will use for you.”
Luke 6:37
Listen, when we forgive, that’s when we are forgiven. When we give grace, that’s how we receive Grace… You cannot separate these. When you don’t feel like God is forgiving you, it could be tied to you not releasing and forgiven other people. Maybe it’s because we can’t forgive others.
ILL - kids holding toys and didn’t want to put them down and try to hold a snack… drop it all and throw a fit. He could not receive the snack because his hands were full.
In the same way, we are holding on to hurt and bitterness and we can’t receive the things God has for us.
2. Acknowledge My Hurts.
2. Acknowledge My Hurts.
It’s not clamming up. It’s releasing it to the Lord.
When we hold onto stuff, it will eventually explode. coke bottle when you shake it up. You can’t tell is expolsive, but it is.
2 So I kept very quiet.
I didn’t even say anything good,
but I became even more upset.
3 I became very angry inside,
and as I thought about it, my anger burned.
So I spoke:
Psalm
Be honest. You know you really want to go burn their house down… God knows what you are thinking
9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.
1 john 1:
This is spiritual Purell. When we confess it, it forgives it and cleanses us.
3. Pray.
3. Pray.
We often pray those “get them” prayers.
When we pray right, God takes us and puts his nature in us.
43 “You have heard that it was said, ‘Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ 44 But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,
Matt 5:43:44
Our first response when people hurt us is to pray.
26 And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, 27 for anger gives a foothold to the devil.
We misuse it… We are angry at our spouse so we make the other one talk about it… That’s not what it’s talking about. He saying that we have to take this to God first. When you do that, God will put his spirit to work in your life.
Foothold - give something a comfortable place in your life.
We give him a comfortable place in our lives and it pushes the HS out of our lives. We have to take hurts to God in prayer before we talk to the person about it.
4. Deal with the root - rejection.
4. Deal with the root - rejection.
Satan in the garden… stirred up the root of rejection in them. He led them to think that God was holding stuff back from them.
Here is how it works in our lives. People do something to us and it hurts and we go, why is God allowing this to happen to us. Why isn’t God seeing the hurt they are causing? We isolate ourselves and it builds in our lives.
You will not be free until you learn to forgive.
ILL - Rick Bezet - addicted but the root was un-forgiveness.
ILL - Lady who was blind, but when she forgave her ex-husband, her sight returned.
23 For I see that you are full of bitterness and captive to sin.”
19 Repent, then, and turn to God, so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord,