Be Kind

Introduction

Ephesians 4:31–32 AV 1873

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tender hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Ephesians 4:31-32

Christians are the most forgiven people in the world. Therefore, we should be the most forgiving people in the world. —Ken Sande, The Peacemaker: a Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict, p. 204

Every moral change a believer makes in his life—referred to as putting off and putting on—is rooted in the experience of his spiritual conversion. The Christian’s walk must conform to the realities of his life:

A new position—member of the body of Christ

A new enemy—the Devil

A new privilege—giving

A new presence—the Holy Spirit

A new peace—forgiveness through Christ

Paul’s final charge to believers in this chapter is to put away bitterness (and all of the various ways it’s displayed), and put on kindness and forgiveness because of experiencing God’s forgiveness through Christ.

Put it Away!

Ephesians 4:31–32 AV 1873

Let all bitterness, and wrath, and anger, and clamour, and evil speaking, be put away from you, with all malice: and be ye kind one to another, tender hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

First of all, Paul commands that bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, evil speaking, and malice be put away. Malicious actions are rooted in bitter attitudes that have developed over time. The major sources of bitterness are reactions towards unjust mistreatments (it’s not fair!”) or unfulfilled expectations (“I’m disappointed!”). These attitudes grow over time and begin to control the heart, eventually contaminating everyone around them.

Hebrews 12:15 AV 1873

looking diligently lest any man fail of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and thereby many be defiled;

It’s like drinking poison in an effort to hurt someone else. The effect of bitterness is seen in the reactions of people to circumstances—wrath and anger. Wrath is a sudden outburst of fury like a volcanic eruption, whereas anger is a slow, internal burning that smolders with rage and resentment. The verbal responses of bitter people include clamoring (vehement shouting at one another) and evil speaking (slander and malicious gossip). Paul commands that these things be put away in an act of repentance, the same response we had at conversion in

Ephesians 4:22 AV 1873

that ye put off concerning the former conversation the old man, which is corrupt according to the deceitful lusts;

Describe various ways in which we can develop bitterness.

Reflect the Lord

Ephesians 4:32 AV 1873

and be ye kind one to another, tender hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you.

Secondly, Paul commands that, because of our new life in Christ, believers are to be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving towards those who we would have been bitter against in the past. Kindness has the idea of being easy towards others. Jesus said,

Matthew 11:30 AV 1873

For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

A tender heart is inclined to deep feelings of pity and concern. Jesus commanded the same idea in

Luke 6:35 AV 1873

But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.

These responses reflect the nature of God’s love and kindness, which He manifested towards us through the sufferings of Jesus Chris on the cross as a sacrifice for our sin:

Titus 3:4 AV 1873

But after that the kindness and love of God our Saviour toward man appeared,

His Rich grace makes forgiveness complete, and therefore we should forgive others as God has forgiven us.

The Bible Knowledge Commentary 4:31–32

be forgiving (lit., “being gracious,” charizomenoi, the participle from the verb charizomai, “to give freely” or “to give graciously as a favor”). The reason for these positive commands is that in Christ God is kind (Eph. 2:7), compassionate (Mark 1:41), and gracious (Rom. 8:32) to believers.

Ephesians 2:7 AV 1873

that in the ages to come he might shew the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness towards us through Christ Jesus.

Mark 1:41 AV 1873

And Jesus, moved with compassion, put forth his hand, and touched him, and saith unto him, I will; be thou clean.

Romans 8:32 AV 1873

He that spared not his own Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with him also freely give us all things?

The word picture here is not lost. The greek word for kind is chrestoi which is very close to

Consider the incredible freedom forgiveness gives to those who have been previously enslaved to bitterness. Past thoughts of hatred and revenge fade away in the crimson flood of Jesus’ blood that cleanses us from all our sins. Tongues that once cursed and fought with others are now used to build up and encourage the discouraged and weak. The new nature in the heart of the believer generates a righteous desire to be reconciled with all of God’s people and to live with them in unity. As we live the new life, let us always be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving to one another. The Son of God not only has forgiven us but also: “hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour ().” The greatest consideration in any interaction we have with other believers is how God has dealt with us in love.

Ephesians 5:2 AV 1873

and walk in love, as Christ also hath loved us, and hath given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweetsmelling savour.

Read , Which announces New Covenant blessings. When God forgives, he chooses to “remember [our] sin no more.” What does it mean, therefore, to forgive?

Read . What are the ramifications when we are angry toward on another instead of forgiving?

In light of God’s forgiveness, discuss why anger, malice, slander, and bitterness are totally unacceptable.

Are any of these sins (anger, malice, slander, bitterness) frequent temptations for you? How can you put these things away?