Caring Gently for Each Other
Text: Galatians 6
Title: Caring Gently
Congregation of our Lord Jesus Christ,
Bad doctors make for some real horror stories. Doctors have amputated the wrong limbs, worked on the wrong discs in the back, gone in and removed a healthy kidney while leaving the wrong one. There are even circumstances where the wrong patients have received something as major as a lung transplant.
From what I understand these cases are few and far between. Could you imagine what it would be like if a doctor was notorious for this sort of problem. You go into the office, you tell them that you have a stomach ache and without any further examination or discussion, they put you down on a table for emergency gallbladder removal when all along it was the liverwurst you had for dinner.
You would never go back to a doctor that didn’t take the time to find out what the real problem was. You might even think he really didn’t care at all.
Crazy thing is, in our care for one another as Christians we jump quickly to solutions. You might accuse Christians of not being very gentle in the way we care for those who slide away.
The passage we are looking at this morning is an encouragement for us to care gently for each other. Paul says if someone is caught in sin, but the word he uses assumes that it is probably going to happen. So we could almost read it this way, since we know that you are going to have people in your fellowship that get caught up in sin. Since sin and back sliding and wandering away and all those nasty things are going to be a reality with Christians, do something about it.
We need to do something about it when we see people caught up in sin. That would involve members of our church who are active in the fellowship here, but living a different way the rest of the week. That would include members of our church who are very content to have their names of membership lists of a church, but they do not have real fellowship with the body of Christ, and may not spend any time at all with God.
The way Paul describes the people who get caught up in sin is really quite interesting. The word “caught up” actually means something like interrupted, or diverted. Perhaps a more meaningful word from our context today would be hijacked. Since there are going to be people who’s spiritually lives have been hijacked, Christians ought to be doing something about it.
The word hijacked brings some potent imagery with it from today’s context. Two planes heading from Boston to Los Angeles had a specific flight plan. The air traffic controllers should have been able to follow their path from Boston to Los Angeles with only the usual difficulty. But they knew something was wrong when the planes started to head off of their logged flight path. The planes were hijacked. They were taken off of their flight path then slammed into the world trade center in New York city. Hijacked. Out of the control of the plane, they were taken off course.
That’s the description in this passage of those who backslide and wander away from following Christ. It a description of what sin can often do in our lives as well. The desire to worship and fellowship with God has been hijacked.
What’s been hijacked, must be returned to the proper course again. An airplane flight has the final goal of bringing travelers to some final destination. A hijacked plane will not accomplish its goal of bringing the travelers to their final destination.
Paul says, in the journey of faith of others, we have the responsibility to return them to their flight plan. He says in verse 1 that we who are spiritual ought to restore that person. The ones who are spiritual are all Christians who claim Jesus is their Lord and savior. So you are off the hook if you are sitting here with no faith in Christ. But if you believe… we are called to restore those whose faith has been hijacked. We need to do all in our power to bring ourselves and them back on the right flight plan.
You know which person God has been placing on your hearts. You know who God is calling you to help restore. You know where you need to make a phone call, or send an email for a first contact. You know because God has put them in your hearts to be deeply concerned over the state of their faith.
Last week we talked about how we need to look out for the needs of others. Paul is saying that again here. We need to look out for the ways that we can bring those with hijacked faith back around again to the right flight plan.
How do we do that? In many circumstances it should follow the pattern if someone sins against you in Matthew 18:15-17. Bring it up with them personally. Then bring two or three others along to speak with them. Then bring it to the attention of the church. And the last step would be the discipline of cutting them off. That’s a pattern of care when there is a sin between two people.
Verse 1 says, “If one of you has been spiritually hijacked with sin, you believers, restore him gently.”
The most common mistake we make in trying to restore people to the proper course is being proud of ourselves and not willing to look out for the needs of others. If we actually do start considering the needs of others, the next common mistake we might make is trying to restore them in a way that helps us feel better, but doesn’t really reach the persons need. Like the gallbladder doctor who pats himself on the back for a job well done, while the patient is still sick.
Let me give you a example that could apply to any number of people we know. Duane and Kathy have stopped going to church. It’s a real sore sport for their parents and their close friends at church. When asked about it, they will tell you it goes back to a falling out they had with some certain people in the church. The falling out happened privately, but they feel like this other family from church has been talking about them with others. Finally, the grapevine made sure that everyone at church knew this “secret problem between them. Duane and Kathy were sick of the drama behind it all, so they stopped going to church.
Method of caring #1 would be the harsh approach. Immediately tell them off for not coming to church any more.
Method of caring #2 would be a little more toned down. It often becomes our default method of caring for our family and friends that wander away.
Duane and Kathy’s parents tried to get them to come back to church again by telling them over and over again that they ought to be going to church. But their efforts have been less and less effective. Now, whenever their parents mention church at all, it feels like a guilt trip and Duane and Kathy are quick to ignore them.
Duane and Kathy’s friends have tried to get them to come back, but their friends are frustrated because they have told Duane and Kathy that the drama is gone, no one cares about what happened a few years ago anymore. Its over with, just forget it and move on.
The parents and friends of Duane and Kathy were right in showing that they cared for them and their spiritual wellbeing. But telling someone to come back to church, or trying to explain away the arguments of the other person is more about our need for wanting to do something, and less about knowing the real need of the other person.
In the Partners flyer put out by Diaconal Ministries Canada there is a short article by an anonymous author called Please, just listen!
“When I ask you to listen to me and you start giving advice, you have not done what I asked nor heard what I need. When I ask you to listen to me and you begin to tell me why I shouldn’t fell that way, you are trampling on my feelings. When I ask you to listen to me and you feel you have to do something to solve my problems, you have failed me- strange as that may seem. When you do something for me that I can and need to do for myself, you contribute to my seeming fearful and weak. So please listen and just hear me. And if you want to talk, let’s plan for your turn, and I promise I’ll listen to you.”
That is great advice for gentle care to the deacons. That’s great advice for the elders as they make home visits and visits to people who are sick or lost loved ones. That’s great advice for all of us who know of someone who has been hijacked from the proper course of faith and life because of some need.
Caring gently begins with listening. Mouth shut… no advice. No reasoning away the other persons problem. No jumping to immediately fix whatever the problem is. No quick jump to discipline. Care that hasn’t first listened can’t be gentle care.
Care that hasn’t listened first can’t be gentle care. This is true when ever we care for some one else. Listen first. That’s great advice for us between spouses in a family. That’s great advice for dealing with teenagers or youth. That’s great advice for dealing with coworkers. And today we are reminded how it is the way to start bringing back those who have wandered away. Listen to begin caring gently.
What if listening doesn’t work? What can’t work? If you listened, it worked. If you listened you showed you cared. It might not change the way the other person lives their life, it might not immediately rescue them from the sin, or from their lack of desire to worship Christ. It won’t immediately accomplish anything, but without listening you can’t begin to care gently.
When you listen you will discover that people stop going to church for lots of different reason. There is never a really good reason to stop worshiping Christ with a body of believers, its part of what Christ calls us to. When we stop worshiping we know we are being hijacked. But there are lots of reasons behind not coming to church. Is it something between people. Is it something to do with the institution of the church. Is it about filling up their Sunday with other things? Has something happened that they have lost their love for Christ? Listening helps us know how to help and it is the beginning of caring gently.
This is God’s will from his word. And all God’s people say, AMEN.