Family and Friendship

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ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Welcome
In the midst of Jesus being confronted and responding to the religious leaders — they are in disagreement about the nature of God… things seem o continue to escalate. In the midst of this, Jesus’ earthly family shows up.
Surely, they’ve heard about what’s going on.
They all gather together and head out to find Jesus.
And here, we see several significant realities that are important for life and for faith in God.
If you’re able, please stand with me for the reading of God’s Word.
Matthew 12:46–50 ESV
While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him. But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
We notice (3) significant realities. (1) Jesus is misunderstood by his own earthly family. (2) Jesus Transforms our understanding of Family, and (3) Within this we see a Radical Invitation & it’s Good News!
Jesus, Misunderstood by His Own Family (vs. 46-47)
Matthew 12:46–47 ESV
While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him.
Some manuscripts insert verse 47… Someone told him, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, asking to speak to you” The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016).
the esv excludes it… it’s redundant
As I said, surely, Jesus’ family has heard what’s going on. Jesus is debating with the religious rulers, that’s not cool. Jesus is saying some fairly controversial statements, word is spreading, people are being healed… his family gets word of this.
I am reminded of ...
Mark 3:
Mark 3:21 ESV
And when his family heard it, they went out to seize him, for they were saying, “He is out of his mind.”
Can you imagine? In Mark this happens 10 verses before what we’re reading here in . So, it seems like this happens not long before what we’re reading today.
Mark 3:21 ESV
And when his family heard it, they went out to seize him, for they were saying, “He is out of his mind.”
Sorry everybody… Jesus hasn’t been sleeping well. He doesn’t mean what he’s saying, don’t mind him. We are just gonna grab him and take him home.
What happens between Jesus’ birth and now? Because we need to remember Jesus’ birth… We could read from
The birth of Jesus is foretold to Mary in a dream from the angel Gabriel. We read that in . Mary says:
Luke 1:46 ESV
And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord,
Luke 1:46–47 ESV
And Mary said, “My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior,
Mary is excited, she believes, she is humbled… “Her soul magnifies the Lord!
Lord, I can’t believe you chose me, I can’t believe this is happening to me… This is incredible.
So what happens? Surely, she hasn’t forgot about the prophecy. Surely, she hasn’t forgotten that God has promised to her Jesus
Luke 1:32 ESV
He will be great and will be called the Son of the Most High. And the Lord God will give to him the throne of his father David,
Luke 1:
But here in , she is embarrassed. Things don’t quite like she imagined in her wildest dreams.
When I woke up from the dream where Gabriel spoke to me… this is not what I imagined then.
A lot like us, right?
[EX] We picture something quite different when we set out for ministry and for a life of following God. We have these moments where God seems so near and we are excited and we want to do something important. We move forward and then, what? Reality happens… and we become worried, maybe we waver, maybe we start to doubt! and maybe… God has us right where he wants us!
the fantasy in our head is much different than reality
what we envision in our excitement and ignorant zeal is much different than what is real!
Why? Because ministry always: (1) involves us and (2) other people
ministry, of which we are all called to as Christians — engaging in God’s work — will always be fraught with certain difficulties because we are sinners and we are surrounded by other sinners.
We’re imperfect. And so, (1) we start to serve others and we aren’t thanked. (2) We start to mentor someone and invest a lot of time into a relationship only to be hurt and left with so many unanswered questions…
Mary needs to be reminded that her ministry isn’t about her, it’s about God. God isn’t all that interested in fulfilling Mary’s “wish-dream” but seems much more interested in accomplishing his master plan!
Mark 3:21 ESV
And when his family heard it, they went out to seize him, for they were saying, “He is out of his mind.”
Matthew 12:46 ESV
While he was still speaking to the people, behold, his mother and his brothers stood outside, asking to speak to him.
Mary has a distant memory of the angel and the prophecy, but this isn’t what she expected. Now she’s going after Jesus… “Jesus please stop… you are just causing the religious establishment to become upset. Jesus, you are embarrassing the family. We already had to try and explain the immaculate conception thing, now this… come on, why don’t you come back home.
But Jesus’ family does end up believing… Jesus family does end up worshipping him.
James 2:1 ESV
My brothers, show no partiality as you hold the faith in our Lord Jesus Christ, the Lord of glory.
James is Jesus earthly brother… and here he is worshipping Jesus. Something happened between and .
Jesus’ family isn’t insane. They had their doubts… we sat that in . But after all is said and done, even Jesus’ family worships him as God.
This is another reason I think the divinity, the true lordship of Jesus is so compelling. There are a lot of gurus, teachers, prophets… but not ones that are followed/worshipped by their own family! Why? Because your family knows the TRUE you… you can’t pretend with your family.
And here, in the NT, we see Jesus’ family ultimately worshipping Jesus as the Son of God!
What we can learn?
Like Jesus, sometimes we will be misunderstood by those closest to us! Sometimes we will be called crazy for following after God. Sometimes, it won’t make sense to those close… but if we remain faithful, steadfast and humble… the fruit of our character and ministry will be evident in time.
[EX] Grandpa Thompson
Jesus’Transforms Our Understanding of Family (vs. 48-49)
Matthew 12:48–49 ESV
But he replied to the man who told him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” And stretching out his hand toward his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers!
Okay, what is happening here? Is Jesus disrespecting his earthly family? Disowning them? What is this?
Well, no.
1 John 4:20 ESV
If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen.
Here, referring to family of God… but still, the point is clear.
1 Timothy 3:4–5 ESV
He must manage his own household well, with all dignity keeping his children submissive, for if someone does not know how to manage his own household, how will he care for God’s church?
Here, the Apostle Paul prioritizes the care of the earthly family… so either the Bible or is inconsistent or Jesus is making a point… what is Jesus saying?
Elsewhere, Jesus uses hyperbole to make a strong point similar to this one:
Luke 14:26 ESV
“If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.
Here, Jesus is reorienting and reprioritizing our understanding of family.
Should we disregard family? Is Jesus calling us to literally hate our earthly family? NO.
ALLEGIANCE: The issue here is an issue of ULTIMATE allegiance. Jesus is making the point that… “in comparison to your commitments to God… to being a disciple of Jesus… your love for the world and earthly relationships should look like hate.” Strong, yes. But… that’s the point.
In comparison to our commitment to God… to being a disciple of Jesus… our love for the world and earthly relationships should look like hate.”
Craig Blomberg writes:
The New American Commentary: Matthew 2. Opposition Experienced in Christ’s Mission (11:1–12:50)

Human kinship does not take priority over spiritual kinship, and Jesus is busy ministering to crowds that include his spiritual family.

Leon Morris similarly says:

Jesus is saying that those with whom he is closely associated in the service of God have become “family” to him.

Jesus is not saying that earthly familial ties are unimportant, only that they are not all-important. Doing the will of God is all-important.

So the question for us is:
“Are we engaged in the family of God?”
Engagement?
self-disclosure
honesty
authenticty
accountability
godliness
prioritizing friendship
>>>Jesus prioritized the family of God… I am kind of amazed in studying this… the height of his priority for this!<<<
For us, friendship is something we often do if everything else gets done.
Or, friendship is based solely on utility… “I am friends with people who I work with… or help me get something I want.
If this is you, you’ve missed a central tenant of Christian spirituality! No wonder you feel lonely…
According to Jesus, friendship is one of the most important things in life.
Are you a good friend?
Are you friendly?
A Radical Invitation (vs. 50)
Matthew 12:50 ESV
For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
WOW — two big themes that stand out to me here: DIVINITY & ADOPTION.
DIVINITY
the will of my father in heaven...
Jesus isn’t being discreet here… “You’re in if you do the will of MY father...” Do you catch the possessive… MY father.
But then he adds the qualifier… “in Heaven.This is NOT an ordinary father! If you’re listening to Jesus, you’re realizing, “oh, he’s not talking about a normal dad here…” He’s talking about God… He is saying he is God’s Son.
Jesus is claiming the reality that he is DIVINE, he is God. Truth is in Him… He’s not just some guru or teacher… he is God’s Son!
ADOPTION
Matthew 12:50 ESV
For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.”
my brother and sister and mother...
Wow. Well now we see the invitation! This is adoption. Jesus is saying, “I am God’s son and you will be MY family, my kin, if you do the will of God.
Jesus is inviting his listeners and us into his family, into the family of God!
This is a radical invitation. Essentially Jesus is saying, “you can have a new, personal, and intimate relationship with the creator of the universe.
Summary
This is why divinity and adoption are so important!
Because again, we’re reminded that truth is determined by our view of Jesus! Jesus is the way to life!
And it points, again, to the cross… because Jesus DID do God’s will perfectly… and in that… DID WHAT WE WERE SUPPOSED TO DO…and took the death that we deserved on the cross… and in what has been called “THE GREAT EXCHANGE” gives us his perfect life and takes our penalty of death.
APPLICATION
Jesus prioritized the family of God and we should as well.
church membership: A Community of Christians we are committed and accountable to.
Foundations Classes
Elders/Pastors teaching
keep us from folly
2 Timothy 4:3 ESV
For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions,
the only way to curb this is to be in community (intentional friendship)
Friendship is one of God’s greatest gifts to humanity.
sin isolates persons
sin is parasitic
it sucks the life out of people
because it’s narcissistic
gospel creates community w/ God and others
Are you being a friend? Are you allowing us to be a friend to you?
Jesus is the means by which God adopts us into his perfect family.
Believe!
Follow!
Be a learner!
Take a risk of faith!
Aren’t you tired of the “same old, same old” — “take a risk of faith...” Start looking into this Gospel-stuff for real! Give it a go!
COMMUNITY GROUP REFLECTION:
Why are genuine life-giving friendships so rare nowadays?
In what ways can I grow in being a Christian friend? In what ways can I grow in allowing others to be a friend to me?
Reread . Why is Christian community such a high priority for Jesus?
COMMUNION
L: In the night in which he was betrayed, Our lord Jesus took bread,He gave thanks; broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying: Take and eat; this is my body, given for you.Do this for the remembrance of me.
L: Again, after supper,He took the cup, gave thanks, and gave it for all to drink, saying; this cup is The new covenant in my blood, shed for you and for all people for the forgiveness of sin.Do this for the remembrance of me. Silent Reflection – to prepare our hearts toCome to the Lords table
L: Jesus' death brings us life and this meal reminds us that we are fed by Jesus and forgiven because of Jesus.
C: We rejoice that You have died, have risen, and are now with the Father advocating for us. Amen.
L: With our money, time, and talent we give generously, knowing that through Your Son, Jesus, You have generously given to us.
C: We rejoice that You have given everything and we joyfully give everything back to Your care. Amen.
L: If you believe Jesus died to forgive you your sins you are welcome to come,
L: Come for all is ready
BENEDICTION
Go forth, remembering who you are and to whom you belong. 
L: Peace be with you.
Someone told him, “Your mother and your brothers are standing outside, asking to speak to you”
the esv excludes it… it’s redundant
C: And also with you.
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version (Wheaton, IL: Crossway Bibles, 2016).
the esv excludes it… it’s redundant
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