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What Does the Bible Say about Bitterness and Resentment?
Where is my life headed?
When you are offended or disappointed by others and allow the hurt to germinate in your heart, bitterness and resentment will take root.
Characterized by an unforgiving spirit and generally negative, critical attitudes, bitterness and resentment are sinful and self-defeating.
They will color your conscious and unconscious thoughts and actions.
Allowed to fester, they will destroy and kill ().
However, they can be dispelled with love.
What Scripture Says
"Make every effort to live in peace with all men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord.
See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many" (,).
"Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you" (,).
"When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he made no threats.
Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly" ().
"Jesus said, Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing..." ().
"For if you forgive men when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
But if you do not forgive men their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins" (,).
"Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.
Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
Live in harmony with one another.
Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.
Do not be conceited.
Do not repay anyone evil for evil.
Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody.
If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: 'It is mine to avenge; I will repay,' says the Lord.
On the contrary: 'If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.'
Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" ().
How to Be Free from Bitterness and Resentment
Like depression and other emotional stress, bitterness and resentment can aggravate or cause physical problems such as arthritis.
You can be affected mentally, spiritually, and otherwise.
Your relationships will always suffer.
God can free you from this sin.
It is an oppressive and destructive emotion having its root in hate, which is likened to murder.
You must repent.
No one can have peace and happiness with such emotions tearing at him.
If you have not done so, ask God to forgive you and to come into your life right now.
He will deliver you from the power of the enemy ().
If you are already a Christian, you should still ask God to forgive you for being bitter and resentful.
Then ask Him to forgive anyone who may have hurt you, and toward whom you are bitter or resentful, even as He forgives you.
Seek to be baptized with the Holy Spirit if you are not already.
Look for opportunities to demonstrate love to the person who offended you.
God forgives and forgets sin.
However, you may have made your best effort to forgive and forget and find that you cannot.
God can help you to cleanse your memory.
Instead of remembering with malice and hurt, remember with forgiveness.
Then go one step further and ask God to forgive your offender.
By forgiving and then asking God to forgive your offender, you release God to bless you and the other person.
As You Pray
Pray in this manner:
Father, I acknowledge that I've held resentment and bitterness against _______________.
I confess this as sin and ask you to forgive me.
I forgive __________________.
Remind me, Lord, to not hold any more resentments, but rather to love this person.
Father, I ask you to also forgive ______________________.
Thank you for hearing and answering my prayer.
In Jesus' name, Amen.
References/Homework
BITTERNESS
ENVY
HATRED
1
MALICE
,
Can God change your life?
God has made it possible for you to know Him and experience an amazing change in your own life.
Discover how you can find peace with God.
You can also send us your prayer requests.
Bitterness, Resentment, and Self-Pity vs. Wholesome Thoughts
Instead of bitterly brooding in self-pity and resentment, feeling sorry for ourselves about mistreatment, God's word can teach us wholesome thoughts.
Introduction:
Many of us tend to brood bitterly in self-pity about real or imagined mistreatment or failures of people around us.
This has often been a problem for me, and I am sure for others too.
Consider some Biblical principles about this subject.
The meaning of the principal terms as we will be using them in the study:
Bitterness – resentful or cynical antagonism or hostility
Self-pity – excessive, self-absorbed unhappiness over one’s troubles, especially problems caused because we believe others have mistreated us or acted improperly.
Resentment – bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly
Note that some of the passages we will study may discuss these concepts or give examples without necessarily using these terms.
Bitter self-pity is closely related to other Bible subjects.
Other related topics include grief, mistreatment, worry, troubles, suffering, anger, depression, vengeance, and hatred.
Much of what we study about this subject should help us deal with these related subjects.
Thinking about our problems is not necessarily wrong, so we will need to examine when it may become wrong.
The Bible gives many examples of people who thought about their problems in order to deal with them.
But in other cases brooding can become harmful or even sinful.
Like anger and many other practices described in Scripture, thinking about our troubles can be good or bad depending on how we react.
So consider with me what we can learn from Scripture about the difference between wholesome meditation and bitter self-pity.
Pray, Trust God, and Meditate on His Word Instead of Brooding.
Examples of Bitter Self-Pity
; ; ; ; ; – Job repeatedly stated that he was bitter because of his suffering.
As a result he complained and blamed God for making him bitter.
God responded by teaching Job to trust God to do right regardless of whether or not he understood.
People who brood over misfortunes often blame God.
Or they may fail to trust that God is in charge and will take care of them.
, – Esau was bitter when he learned that Jacob had deceived their father Isaac in order to receive the blessing that Isaac intended to give to Esau.
As a result, he hated Jacob and determined that, after their father died, he would kill Jacob.
Bitter brooding often leads us to seek vengeance or harm those we believe mistreated us.
– Ahab wanted to buy Naboth’s vineyard, but Naboth refused.
So Ahab went home sullen and displeased, lay down on his bed, turned his face to the wall, and would not eat.
So self-pity may lead us to pout and feel sorry for ourselves when no one really did us wrong.
Eventually Naboth was murdered as a result.
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