CHOICES, CONSEQUENCES, & CONFLICT

Genesis 13:1–18 ESV

1 So Abram went up from Egypt, he and his wife and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the Negeb. 2 Now Abram was very rich in livestock, in silver, and in gold. 3 And he journeyed on from the Negeb as far as Bethel to the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Bethel and Ai, 4 to the place where he had made an altar at the first. And there Abram called upon the name of the Lord. 5 And Lot, who went with Abram, also had flocks and herds and tents, 6 so that the land could not support both of them dwelling together; for their possessions were so great that they could not dwell together, 7 and there was strife between the herdsmen of Abram’s livestock and the herdsmen of Lot’s livestock. At that time the Canaanites and the Perizzites were dwelling in the land. 8 Then Abram said to Lot, “Let there be no strife between you and me, and between your herdsmen and my herdsmen, for we are kinsmen. 9 Is not the whole land before you? Separate yourself from me. If you take the left hand, then I will go to the right, or if you take the right hand, then I will go to the left.” 10 And Lot lifted up his eyes and saw that the Jordan Valley was well watered everywhere like the garden of the Lord, like the land of Egypt, in the direction of Zoar. (This was before the Lord destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah.) 11 So Lot chose for himself all the Jordan Valley, and Lot journeyed east. Thus they separated from each other. 12 Abram settled in the land of Canaan, while Lot settled among the cities of the valley and moved his tent as far as Sodom. 13 Now the men of Sodom were wicked, great sinners against the Lord. 14 The Lord said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, “Lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward, 15 for all the land that you see I will give to you and to your offspring forever. 16 I will make your offspring as the dust of the earth, so that if one can count the dust of the earth, your offspring also can be counted. 17 Arise, walk through the length and the breadth of the land, for I will give it to you.” 18 So Abram moved his tent and came and settled by the oaks of Mamre, which are at Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.

INTRODUCTION:

1. Every day we make choices.

We choose what we are going to wear, what we are going to eat, what time we will leave.

We choose how we will spend our time, what we will say, how we will respond.

We make hundreds, if not thousands of choices every day.

The people who make good choices succeed, those who make poor choices don’t.

2. The choices we make determine the path we travel…and the choices we make determine the enjoyment we experience in living.

In other words, choices have an effect on our lives…Or we could say consequences.

And as we will see in this passage - choices that have been made can also lead to conflict between people…which is a consequence.

3. So tonight, as we study this passage we are going to learn about making good choices, dealing with the consequences of sin & handling conflict.

1) Consequences of Sin

1. Your Past Sin Will Impact Your Present Life

The truth is what you’ve done in the past will often impact you in the present.

It’s the principle - you reap what you sow.

Galatians 6:7–8 ESV

7 Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap. 8 For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.

Abraham went down to Egypt…which wasn’t God’s will…and in this chapter we see him dealing with the consequences.

Abraham went down to Egypt…which wasn’t God’s will…and in this chapter we see him dealing with the consequences.

The wealth that he had accumulated wasn’t a blessing but a curse.

It's creating conflict between his herdsmen & Lot's herdsmen.

Lesson

Worldly possessions acquired by worldly means often lead to worries.

In other words, the person who lives for this world will constantly be worried about their money & possessions.

For example - the person who invests their money in the stock market will constantly be checking to see how the market is doing…and depending on how well the market is doing that day will often determine what mood they’re in.

This is why in - Jesus tells us not to lay up treasures on earth…but rather lay up treasures in heaven.

Then He goes on to say - “do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on.” ()

NOTE: Jesus understood that worldly possessions is the cause of much of our worry.

In our passage tonight - the worries that came with the possessions of Abram involved division and disunity.

NOTE: Whenever God blesses us, He adds no sorrow with it.

Proverbs 10:22 ESV

22 The blessing of the Lord makes rich, and he adds no sorrow with it.

We also see in this chapter that he is having to deal with a situation that goes back before he ever went to Egypt.

When God blesses, there is no regret.

When God blesses, there is contentment…happiness…and peace.

2. We also see in this chapter that he is having to deal with a situation that goes back before he ever went to Egypt.

Lot’s presence is creating a problem for Abraham.

Lot should have never been permitted to travel with him.

God told Abram to leave his family behind…and that meant everyone except for his wife.

Why he allowed Lot to go along with him - I don't know…but it's creating a problem for him?

If he had obeyed completely then…he wouldn't be dealing with this problem now.

Lesson

One way or another God's will is going to be done.

It could have been done by Abram in Ur, but it wasn't.

So, God providentially brought an irritation and competition between Abram and Lot which forced a separation to occur.

NOTE: Sooner or later, God’s purposes will come to pass.

If we don't see the need for obedience, God will create one…You can count on it.

(Illus. Jonah)

NOTE: Abraham is having to live with the consequences of his disobedience…and so will we.

Sin will have consequences.

They may not show up immediately…but they will show up.

We will reap what we have sown.

2) Dealing with Conflict

As a result of his disobedience…and making a wrong choice to go to Egypt…Abram has now brought about conflict between himself & Lot.

So, how does Abram avoid this conflict?

A. Choose Relationships over Rights

Abraham chose to keep the peace…rather than demand his own way.

He was the eldest…and the chief of the clan and he had a right to choose whatever land he wanted & could have let Lot take the leftovers.

God had promised the land to him…not to Lot.

However, he chose the relationship over his own rights.

Gen. 13:

Genesis 13:8 ESV

8 Then Abram said to Lot, “Let there be no strife between you and me, and between your herdsmen and my herdsmen, for we are kinsmen.

“we are kinsmen”… “we are brothers”

In other words, “there is more that unites us than divides us.”

He practiced humility…and he preferred Lot over himself.

Rather than ruin a relationship over a piece of land…He practiced humility & he preferred Lot over himself.

Philippians 2:3–4 ESV

3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.

NOTE: Conflict is usually a result of selfishness…Conflict arises b/c we want things our way…but to end conflict, we can't demand our own way.

NOTE: Conflict is usually a result of selfishness…Conflict arises b/c we want things our way…but to end conflict, we can't demand our own way.

So much strife could be avoided in the family and in the church if we would put a premium on our relationships, set aside our rights, and let the Lord take care of us.

Be Obedient 3. Things (Gen. 13:5–18)

The spiritual Christian does not insist on his or her own rights but gladly yields to others.

NOTE: A lot of strife & division could end in most churches if we would remember that we are united in Christ…

B. Believe that God will take care of you

Abraham let Lot choose first and we see that Lot chose what appeared to be the best land…which means that Abraham was going to have to trust God to take care of him.

B/C Abram had preferred Lot over himself…he was going to have to live by faith…and believe that God would provide for him.

By laying aside his rights…he was going to have to believe the promise that God had made to him.

NOTE: Conflict at times will place you in situations where it seems like others will benefit more than you…and when that happens, you have to believe that God will take care of you.

When you prefer others over yourself in order to avoid conflict & keep peace…you must trust that God will take care of you.

Genesis 13:14–15 ESV

14 The Lord said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, “Lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward, 15 for all the land that you see I will give to you and to your offspring forever.

Genesis 13:14 ESV

14 The Lord said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, “Lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward,

After Lot left…God speaks to Abram again & reaffirms His promise to him to take care of him.

Notice this - God speaks only after Lot separates from Abram.

God hasn’t spoken to Abram since …before his disobedience.

But now that Abram has returned to God…Lot is gone & Abram is in the will of God again…God speaks to Him again.

Lesson

It should be our aim & goal to maintain unity…and keep peace.

Romans 12:18 ESV

18 If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.

Rom. 12:

Romans 14:19 ESV

19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.

Hebrews 12:14 ESV

14 Strive for peace with everyone, and for the holiness without which no one will see the Lord.

3) Making Wise Choices

1. Since we are always making choices…we need ask ourselves...

How do we make good choices…wise choices?

How do we make choices that honor & please God?

NOTE: Our choices shouldn’t be to satisfy ourselves.

As best as we can - we should discern God’s will & choose in line with His will for our lives.

2. So, how do we do that…Let me give you 3 principles for making good, godly choices.

A. Make choices which Value Godliness over Greed

By faith, Abram had already renounced everything visible and opted for the unseen promises of God.

So he had no need, as Lot did, to choose by sight.

You will notice in the passage that there is a deliberate contrast between verses 10 and 14.

In verse 10, Lot lifted up his eyes and chose the land which looked the best to him.

He took off for the good life and left Abram literally in the dust, where there had just been a severe famine.

In verse 14, as Abram is standing there wondering if he did the right thing…and God tells him to lift up his eyes and look in every direction.

All the land he can see will be his.

NOTE: Lot chose by sight and ended up spiritually and financially bankrupt.

He escaped Sodom with the clothes on his back and fades out living in a cave.

The things he saw and got didn’t bring him the lasting happiness he expected.

Abram chose by faith, not by sight, and ended up spiritually and financially blessed.

Lot lived for greed and came up empty…but Abram lived for God and came up full.

The question we need to answer is this - How can we know whether we are under the influence of greed?

Charles Simeon, a godly 19th century British pastor, offered three helpful criteria for evaluating ourselves (Expository Outlines on the Whole Bible [Zondervan], XII:469-471).

First, we may judge ourselves by the manner in which we seek the things of this world…

If we find ourselves thinking more about the things of this world and how to get them than about God - or if the thought of having them brings us more pleasure than our thoughts about God - or if we are willing to violate our conscience or neglect spiritual duties to pursue those things, then we are governed by greed.

Second, we may judge ourselves by the manner in which we enjoy the things of this world…

There is nothing wrong with enjoying the things God provides us. But, if we start thinking, “If I just had such and such, I would be happy,” or if we think that by getting so much in the bank, we will be secure from the trials of life, then we’ve shifted our trust from God to material things, and we are governed by greed.

Third, we may judge ourselves by the manner in which we mourn the loss of the things of this world…

Christians are not to be devoid of feelings...But here Simeon is getting at the principle which enabled Job, when he lost all his worldly possessions, to say, “The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

It enabled Paul to be content with much or with little, because Christ was his sufficiency.

NOTE: If our joy rides on our possessions or if we are filled with anxiety and grief if we lose them, then we are more governed by greed than by God.

B. Make choices which Value Fellowship with God over the Approval of the World

Lot has often been criticized for moving to Sodom, but it's often not mentioned that both Abram and Lot lived in corrupt cultures.

To compare the Canaanites with the Sodomites is like comparing Stalin with Hitler.

The Sodomites rated a 10 on the wickedness scale, and the Canaanites a 9.5.

So you have to ask, “Why did Abram remain untainted, but Lot became corrupted?”

The answer is in verse 18.

Genesis 13:18 ESV

18 So Abram moved his tent and came and settled by the oaks of Mamre, which are at Hebron, and there he built an altar to the Lord.

We see again the two things that marked Abram’s life of obedient faith, the tent and the altar: Abram the pilgrim, just passing through; and, Abram the worshiper, bearing witness to a pagan world.

We see again the two things that marked Abram’s life of obedient faith, the tent and the altar: Abram the pilgrim, just passing through…and, Abram the worshiper, bearing witness to a pagan world.

NOTE: You don’t ever find Lot building an altar in Sodom, and he traded in his tent for a townhouse.

He settled in Sodom and blended in with their corruption.

He became popular & sat on their city council.

But Abram lived in fellowship with God and became known as the friend of God.

On thing that I want to point out from the story of Abram & Lot is that you never find Lot building an altar.

He seems

NOTE: As Christians, we always face a tension: If we pull out of the world too far, we lose our witness because there is no contact.

But if we blend in with the world, we lose both our fellowship with God and our witness to the world.

Jesus was the friend of sinners, but He was never tainted by their sin because He put a premium on fellowship with the Father and He never sought the approval of the world.

He was in the world with a clear sense of His mission, to glorify the Father and to seek and to save the lost.

If we want to line up with Abram rather than with Lot…we’ve got to be people of the tent and the altar, pilgrims and worshipers, here to bear witness.

We must put fellowship with God above the approval of the world in all our decisions.

C. Make choices which Value God’s Eternal Promises over Immediate Pleasure

Lot’s choice of Sodom was based on what would bring him quick gratification, but he didn’t take into account God’s promise to Abram about the land.

After Lot moved to Sodom, the Lord reaffirmed His promise to Abram and even expanded on it (13:14-17).

F. B. Meyer says that God wanted Abram “to feel as free in the land as if the title deeds were actually in his hands” (Abraham [Christian Literature Crusade], p. 50).

God wanted to give Abram a graphic picture of what it means to possess by faith what God had promised…even though it wouldn’t be an actuality in Abram’s lifetime.

NOTE: As believers we are to live by faith in the promises of God.

When we face decisions, we take God into account and make those decisions in line with His promises and principles…not the immediate gratification of the flesh.

We deny ungodliness and worldly desires in light of the blessed hope of Christ’s return (), trusting that His promises concerning eternity are true.

Jesus said, “Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be added to you” ().

Most of us want to seek the other things first and add the kingdom of God later in our spare time.

The next time you face a decision that involves a major commitment of your time or a move to a different location, make the decision based on how it will affect your own and your family’s commitment to the kingdom, not on financial factors alone.

If the extra hours and the move will bring you more money, you need to ask, Why do we want more money?

Is it so we can give more to missions…and more to God’s work.?

If the bottom line is that you want more money because you want more things, then you’re not seeking first God’s kingdom.

Lesson

What You See is Not Necessarily what You Should Seek

It’s dangerous to base decisions on what you see alone.

Think about this - Satan tempts us with what we see.

Like a colorful lure on the end of a fish hook, the enemy seeks to catch people through what is seen.

Your flesh lusts after what is seen and so it creates a situation where we become susceptible to the temptations of Satan.

Satan tempted Eve with what she saw ()…Achan went to his ruin because he sought after what he saw ()…Satan tempted Jesus with what he put before Him to see ().

If we choose based only on what we see…it will lead to trouble.

Lot chose based on what he saw…and he never considered what it would cost him.

He saw the financial benefits to his decision…but never considered how it would effect him spiritually.

2 Peter 2:8 ESV

8 (for as that righteous man lived among them day after day, he was tormenting his righteous soul over their lawless deeds that he saw and heard);

He also never thought about how his decision would effect his family - he lost his wife…and his two daughters seduced him & caused him to commit incest.

He also never thought about how his decision would effect his family - he lost his wife…and his two daughters seduced him & caused him to commit incest.

NOTE: Just b/c something looks good doesn't mean that it is good.

Lot found that out the hard way…and too often we do as well.

NOTE: If possible, never make a decision by sight alone.

What you see isn’t always what you get.

In other words, looks can be deceiving.

Be Obedient 3. Things (Gen. 13:5–18)

Abraham’s eyes were on the holy city of God (Heb. 11:13–16), and he went on to walk with the Lord and inherit blessing. Lot’s eyes were on the sinful cities of men, and he went on to worldly success, spiritual failure, and a shameful end.

Where are you looking this evening? Are you looking to heaven… or to the world?

This is important b/c - Where you look will determine how you live.

Lesson

Lesson

Prayer should be play a vital role in every decision that we make.

Abram had an altar & spent time with God…but you’ll notice in & 13 that Lot is never said to have an altar.

There isn’t any hint that he ever spent time with God or sought God about anything he did…He had no altar…He had no period of waiting on God.

And look where he ended up.

Exploring Genesis: An Expository Commentary 1. Restrained by God (13:10–13)

A man who is weak in his devotions and worldly in his desires will inevitably be wrong in his decisions (13:11–13).

If it weren’t for …you would think that Lot was a lost man.

By his actions & choices…he certainly doesn’t look to be a righteous man…but the bible says that he was.

However, the point I want to make is this - Had Lot sought God I believe things would have been different in his life…Had he been a man of prayer his life could have turned out differently...

NOTE: When we fail to seek God, we will make a lot wrong decisions in life.

Prayer must be a priority in our decision making.

CONCLUSION:

1. Examine the choices you make b/c they will have consequences… one of which may be conflict.

2. And if you’re faced with conflict tonight - do what you can to resolve it.

Let’s pray!