LOVE IS LIKE THAT

LOVE IS LIKE THAT 1 John 4:7-21 With grateful acknowledgement of these sources of direction and inspiration: the Holy Spirit; the Word of God; Philip Gulley, "Home Town Tales"; Anne Graham Lotz, My Heart's Cry; Max Lucado, A Love Worth Giving; John MacArthur, Jr., The Love of God; John Stott, The Contemporary Christian September 14, 2003 Given by: Pastor Rich Bersett [Index of Past Messages] Open with a five and a half-minute cutting from Philip Gulley's Hometown Tales, Tape One, "The Clothesline." "Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love each other, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. We know that we live in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us. God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. Love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The man who fears is not made perfect in love. We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother." 1 John 4:7-21 Love really is somewhat difficult to define. If you resorted to the dictionary, you'd find 11 different meanings for the word love as both a noun and a verb, and they have to do with everything from God to romance to sex to tennis scores. You just don't learn about such godly virtues as love from the dictionary. Imagine a young man staring into the eyes of a young woman and saying, "I have tender and passionate affection for you as a member of the opposite sex." Somehow that's a bit cold and clinical. The three most common Greek words for love are PHILEO, EROS AND AGAPE. The first is the kind of love that two best friends would have for each other-not a romantic love, but based on commonality, mutual compassion and shared experiences. We don't have an English word that adequately conveys phileo love. Erotic love is what eros love refers to. It is a love of passion. Although its meaning is really wider than sexual passion, its primary meaning has become associated with sexual passion. We get close to the meaning of this Greek term when we refer to sexual intercourse as "making love". The third popular Greek term in the scripture is the word agape. This word suggested to the Greek conversationalist the idea of a deep, spiritual love, a love that was not just mental or emotional, but one that also acted for the benefit of the one loved. This is the word used in the text we just read, and also in every other text in the Bible that refers to godly love. Agape love is absolutely unaffected by whether or not the other person is attractive or sweet. It exists whether or not the person being loved reciprocates love to the loving one. It does not care if it benefits at all from loving the other. It transcends normal, natural love. It is supernatural. The agape-style lover has sacrificed all rights and privileges in order to love and act for the benefit of the one loved. Agape love values and serves the other even if the other person is malevolent, mean and just plain bad. The Bible says that God loves us that way. God demonstrates his own love for us in this: "While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5:8) And we just read 1 John 4:9-10 -"This is how God showed his love among us. He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love, not that we loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." Leith Anderson tells about the time he and his wife went shopping for a used mini van. He spied a 1993 Dodge Caravan that looked flawless, had only 3,000 miles on it and was priced incredibly low. So he talked to the salesman who informed him that the previous owner didn't like the car, had had considerable difficulty with it, and had forced the Chrysler Corporation to buy it back from him under the lemon law. Leith and his wife didn't even look inside the van or test drive it. He said "Over my lifetime I have already had my share of lemons. Why would I want to buy a car up front that has LEMON written on the windshield?" The amazing thing about God is, He loves lemons. He pays top price for lemons! With the blood of His Son's atoning sacrifice he bought us "as is"-while "we were yet sinners"-and paid full book price. Why? Agape! Love is like that-it loves the unlovely, gives to the one who is incapable of giving back, sacrifices for those who have no value (according to others). It may be difficult to define from a dictionary, but godly love is learned by experience. Those who have received the love of God through Christ have it to give to others. Bruce Thielemann tells a story that illustrates the kind of love behavior that naturally issues from the life of someone who has a reconciled and restored love relationship with God. A teaching hospital found one of its young resident students had a marvelous effect on children. They responded to him with delight. They would do things for him and yield to his ministrations in a way that they wouldn't do for any other person on the staff. They assigned a nurse to discover what the secret of this young resident was. It wasn't until the second week when she was on night shift that she found out the secret. It was simply this: Every night on his last round he would kiss, and hug, and tuck in every one of the children. It was in that act of compassion, you see, in that act of sympathy, that he made his contact. And it's this--this sympathy, this compassion that belongs to Jesus--that reaches out to us. It's this about him that charms us more than anything else. Loving because God first loved us (1 John 4:19) is not some religious formula. It is not a test or a required regimen. It is the life that naturally flows from a person who has been so touched by the love of God, so delivered, so transformed, that he can't help but "exude" that same love toward others. It is the life of Jesus at work within us that flows through us to others, almost effortlessly. We have been kissed by the Son and we have been changed. And our lives are transformed as we learn from Him to unceremoniously love and serve others-the lovely and the unlovely, the worthy and the unworthy, good and the bad, those who return love and those who don't. A letter from a 4th grader appear in the newspaper: "Dear Abby: I am ugly - my sister is beautiful; I am dumb - my brother is smart. What should I do?" The best advice was provided by another fourth grader who read the letter and replied: "If you are loved, that's all that matters." Love is like that-it heals the hurting, the forgotten and the downtrodden in this unfriendly world. Todd Wilson has been involved in an Indiana nursing home ministry for the past six years. He meets many great seniors, but one unnamed lady has drawn him a living picture of love: "She stays with her husband, who sits and lies with limbs awkwardly drawn, not talking or responding. She wheels him up and down those halls and sits by his bed as he sleeps. She doesn't read to pass the time, but pulls her chair close, leaning on him. She may be praying for him or shielding him, but it is clear that she loves him. Season after season, she sits, holding her man with no one watching except God and a young man who is grateful for this lesson on real love. Love is like that-it serves, expecting nothing in return. For thirteen years Esther Kim had one dream. The Summer Olympics. She wanted to represent the United States on the Olympic tae kwon do squad. From the age of eight, she spent every available hour in training. In fact, it was in training that she met and made her best friend, Kay Poe. The two worked so hard for so long that no one was surprised when they both qualified for the 2000 Olympic trials in Colorado Springs. Everyone, however, was surprised when they were placed in the same division. They'd never competed against each other, but when the number of divisions was reduced, they found their names on the same bracket. It would be just a matter of events before they found themselves on the same mat, squaring off with one another. One would win and one would lose. Only one could go to Australia, and they both knew it. As if the moment needed more drama, two facts put Esther Kim in a heartrending position. First, her friend Kay injured her leg in the match prior to theirs. Kay could scarcely walk, much less compete. Because of the injury Esther could defeat her friend with hardly any effort. But then there was a second issue. Esther knew that Kay was the better fighter. If she took advantage of her temporarily crippled friend, the better athlete would stay home. So what did Esther do? Esther stepped onto the floor and bowed to her friend and opponent. Both knew the meaning of the gesture. Esther forfeited her place. She considered the cause more important than the credit, and her friend more important than her success. Love is like that, putting others ahead of self. There's another Olympic story-it happened at a "Special Olympics" event in Seattle a few years ago. It was the hundred-yard dash, where nine mentally and physically handicapped children competed against each other. With great anticipation the runners lined up and waited for the gun. They were smiling and full of energy, hoping to win but thrilled just to compete. The starting gun was fired and all nine kids ran down the track as fast as they could. Suddenly one of the boys stumbled and rolled over. A gasp spread through the stands. Then, with no prompting, a little girl with Down's Syndrome stopped, turned around, and went to the fallen boy. She knelt beside him and said, "Here, this will make it feel all better." They she kissed him on the cheek. One by one, the other special runners stopped and returned to the spot where the boy lay crumpled. They reached down and helped him up. Then, arm in arm, all nine of those wonderful kids went toward the finish line together. They all crossed the line at the same time, so that all nine could win. And they really were all winners, weren't they? By now the entire crowd was standing tears glistened on everyone's cheeks as they applauded. They were applauding love delivered when least expected. Brethren, we are all strugglers stumbling toward a finish line. We need help and sympathetic kisses and we need to give love as well as receive it. It is in this way that victory comes. Love is like that. Have we adequately defined love yet? Maybe we could add some local illustrations. Here's what love is like: A few individuals who brave their own self-doubts and enlist for the job of helping to look after, care for and encourage toward maturity some dozen or more adults and whatever children that come with the package. They're called cell leaders and, sure, they'd be a lot more comfortable just taking care of themselves, not worrying about organizing, encouraging, leading (and sometimes putting up with) the small flock they call their cell groups. But they dedicate themselves to their commitment and serve selflessly, week in and week out. They spend hours discipling and praying with others when they could be enjoying some leisure. But love is like that. There are a couple dozen men and women who believe in loving and ministering to not only their own children, but kids from other families, including families where the parents who are willing to send their kids to church but never attend themselves. Yes, these children's workers miss the teaching and fellowship that goes on upstairs, but they sacrifice to help meet the needs in the lives of the children, supplementing the godly teaching that goes on in their homes (or may not). Love is like that. Two or three men who work full-time and overtime on their jobs, come home to mow their own lawns, and yet every week show up to mow the 3 acres of grass around the worship center. What drives people to serve like that when the heat factor bumps three digits? Love for God and His church. Love is like that. Then there are the Ministry Team leaders who dedicate themselves to an area of service and lead a few others in making sure the needs of the body are taken care of. The commitment calls for meetings, hours of work on projects and the necessary intercession for God's leading and power. What is it that motivates people to take on such responsibilities? It is love. Love is like that. There are the generous few who are always ready to help meet a financial need, giving hundreds of dollars a year beyond their tithe to bless others who are facing lay-offs, budget shortfalls and emergency needs. They are like anyone else and they could find a dozen ways to spend that discretionary money, but they have pledged to the Lord to make available the resources He has loaned to them. Why? Because love is like that. There are multiple individuals and families who regularly extend hospitality and offers of friendship to unsaved and unchurched neighbors and coworkers. Sure it would be nice to ignore the needs of others and stay at home looking out for number one. But, obeying the impulse of the Spirit, they reach out in whatever way they can with the hope that they are influencing others toward a decision for Christ. Sometimes the influence has obvious results, most of the time it does not. But they press on. Love is like that. An eighty-six year old man who every week volunteers his time to preach to prisoners in the county jail. Praise Team musicians, vocalists and leaders who could be relaxing with a cup of coffee at 8:30, but are already at the worship center practicing the music they've studied during the week. The ten-year-old boy who delightedly gives ten percent of his allowance and extra money he earns to the missions offering in Kid City. The secretary who is a single mom but regularly offers extra hours to make sure planning, printing and other paperwork is done in a timely fashion. Puppeteers whose shoulders ache from long hours of practice and performance delivering the word of God through their powerful medium. Audio-visual ministry workers who are often working into the late hours after work when no one else sees to make sure things are working smoothly for Celebration and outreach ministries-who are forever plugging and unplugging wires, carrying speakers and equipment and trying to engineer edifying sound for the congregation and visitors. Hospitality Team members who prepare meals, clean kitchens, greet visitors and bless the rest of us with all their behind-the-scenes work. A physically disabled sister who does mountains of printing and library work, making resources available to the rest of us. Finance workers who could be going out to Sunday lunch but dutifully take care of the fiscal business first. Cell interns, serving people in a variety of capacities and preparing themselves for the commitment to serve as cell leaders. Missionaries and Kingdom Expansion Ministry Team members who pray and serve the missionaries, giving of themselves to help the rest of us likewise support and encourage those serving in stations around the globe. They do it all, because love drives them and love is like that. Members from cell groups who visit the sick and the needy among them. Intercessors who spend hours daily praying for the leaders of the church. Kid City teachers, ushers, workers and helpers who stretch their patience thin as they serve the vivacious younger set. Elders who drag themselves out of bed before dawn so they can pray together for the body of Christ before going off to their full time jobs. Men who, with their faithful wives and sacrificial families, spend themselves in prayer and ministry for people. Teenagers who volunteer for anything they can make time for-from delivering flyers to the homes of our neighbors, to childcare, to teaching, and countless other service activities they perform month in and month out. And they all serve with such a pure heart of genuine caring and concern. Love is like that. I love to observe and engage in these things alongside the members of this church family. The motivation you operate in is clearly the love of God. You have taken seriously John's exhortation, Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another….God lives in us and his love is made complete in us. (1 John 4:11-12) When people find themselves unable to do the good works they truly want to do for God, it is because they have not yet partaken of God's love in their own lives yet. Remember, we are motivated and empowered by God's love at work in our hearts. If you have a sincere desire to love people and serve them in the name of the Lord, but you lack the motivation and power, here's your answer: you need to come to Christ as your Savior. You need to let the love of God first envelope and heal you. Then, and only then, will you be free to love others. Husbands and wives, if you're having a hard time loving each other, one or both of you need a renewed, restored and reconciled relationship with your Creator. And He has provided it in the sending of His one and only Son. The question is, will you accept His love? Will you let it heal and renew you? [Back to Top]