HALL MONITORS IN THE SCHOOL OF CHRISTIAN MATURITY: PART 2 – KINDNESS

HALL MONITORS IN THE SCHOOL OF CHRISTIAN MATURITY: PART 2 – KINDNESS Colossians 3:12 January 27, 2008 Given by: Pastor Rich Bersett [Index of Past Messages] Introduction There is a great story about a young minister who was preaching at a large church and he was very nervous. This was a rather liturgical church. Every Sunday before he preached, he always spoke the words, “The Lord be with you!” The congregation would respond with the words, “And also with you.” The sound technician was a little slow that morning and had not yet activated the minister’s microphone when the nervous young man stood and said, “The Lord be with you.” No response, so he fiddled with the microphone. The sound snapped on just as the minister said, “There seems to be something wrong with this thing.” The congregation dutifully recited, “And also with you!” How many times have you thought to yourself, there is something wrong with this world? People are just not as nice as they used to be. There is rudeness in public places, and mean talk all around us. Language that once was relegated to smoky bars or spoken respectfully only in a whisper is loudly and unashamedly shared with no respect to the presence of children or others who are offended by it. Eff words, coarse language of all kinds and regular abuse of the Lord’s name are commonplace. This week I read Lynne Truss’ insightful book, “Talk to the Hand,” (itself a crude read, but an insightful expose). She makes the point that we are now fully immersed in what she calls the collapse of civility. You are normal if you are vulgar, and if you are nice to others you are seen as weak and vulnerable to social bullying. Of course vulgar in the original Latin (vulgare) actually meant “commonplace, normal behavior or speech,” but it has come to represent lewd, out of place in mixed company or normal society. A couple of years ago my grandson, Gage, and I went to the Cardinals game and we took the Metro-Link. In our car were four boys—they looked to be between 12 and 15 years—who were using some very vile language at very high volume while they rough-housed in the aisle. I brought to their attention there were a lot of others on the train who did not deserve to have to listen to that kind of language, including my five-year old grandson. With his chest stuck out and a snooty look their leader-apparent let me know in no uncertain terms that they could talk any way they wanted to, and wondered if I thought I could do anything about it. Along with a strong desire to slap this boy’s face, it came to me that no one else had amen-ed my concern, nor had they indicated any desire to be part of an altercation. It also struck me that this is just the kind of kid who might have a knife. Simultaneously I realized that I had stupidly boarded the car farthest from the driver, with no security guard in sight. I backed down, humiliated by a punk kid because I was outnumbered and solo, and especially because of the danger to Gage. I have since resolved to ride only in the front car or in the obvious presence of security personnel. Something died in me that day: it was my confidence in the goodness of people—not only young hooligans, but also people who would stand up in public for what is right. I settled for praying for those boys and reassuring a frightened five-year old that not everyone in the world was bad—though at that moment I had my doubts. Sixty years ago George Orwell wrote in his futuristic book, “1984” that the way society was going the future was going to be like “a boot stomping on a human face forever.” I’ve pondered the metro event many times in the past 10 years and I am still not over the social pessimism it birthed in me. But I have come to one positive conclusion: despite people’s unwillingness to get involved, they are unsettled about our social ills, and the time is right and ripe for God’s people to battle this unholy swell, not with weapons or even more virulent language, but with kindness. These days if you just say “thank you” you’re above average in the grade-book of courtesy. What a great time for the church to rise in a crusade of kindness that will stand in stark contrast to the dark pall of incivility. It’s not only timely, but it is the perfect will of God. Let’s read yet one more scripture on kindness Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly love, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Once upon a time, there was a good and kind king who had a great kingdom with many cities. In one distant city, some people took advantage of the freedom the king gave them and started doing evil. They profited by their evil and began to fear that the king would interfere and throw them in jail. Eventually, these rebels began to hate the king. They convinced the people of the city that everyone would be better off without the king, and the city declared its independence from the kingdom. Soon everyone was doing whatever they wanted and disorder reigned in the city. There was violence, hatred, lying, oppression, murder, rape, slavery, and fear. The king thought: What should I do? If I take my army and conquer the city by force, the people will fight against me. I will have to kill so many, and the rest will only submit through fear or intimidation, which will make them hate me and all I stand for even more. How does that help them—to be either dead or imprisoned or secretly seething with rage? But if I leave them alone, they'll destroy each other, and the pain they're causing and experiencing breaks my heart. So the king did something very surprising. He took off his robes and dressed in the rags of a homeless wanderer. Incognito, he entered the city and began living in a vacant lot near a garbage dump. His new trade was fixing broken pottery and furniture. Whenever people came to him, his kindness fairness and respect were so striking that they would linger just to be in his presence. They would tell him their fears and questions, and ask his advice. He told them that the rebels had fooled them, and that the true king had a better way to live, which he exemplified and taught. One by one, then two by two, and then by the hundreds, people began to have confidence in him and live his way. Their influence spread to others, and the movement grew and grew until the whole city regretted its rebellion and wanted to return to the kingdom again. But, ashamed of their horrible mistake, they were afraid to approach the king, believing he would certainly destroy them for their rebellion. But the king-in-disguise told them the good news: he was himself the king, and he loved them. He held nothing against them, and he welcomed them back into his kingdom, having done by gentle, subtle presence and quiet kindness what never could have been accomplished through brute force or command. Let me suggest four biblical values we will have to trust in, believe in, if we want to put on kindness as Paul instructs us: BELIEVE IN THE VALUE OF KINDNESS You see, it will never do to just give a nod of approval to the virtue of kindness, and say, “That’s real nice, and we ought to practice that sort of thing as often as we can.” The Word of God calls us to a “vocation of kindness.’ This not a matter of committing ourselves to doing two kind acts a week; this is an attitudinal change. When Jesus ministered to people He wasn’t trying to fill a quota. He didn’t satisfy Himself with doing kind things—He was kind. And He calls us to be kind. Well, preacher, maybe you ought to define what being kind is! Okay, to be kind is to be … kind! Don’t tell me you don’t know what being kind is. It’s what the last person who blessed you was being. It’s practicing Matthew 7:12 – In everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. The Bible says God expresses His kindness in His providence toward us. There is no greater expression of that kindness than the giving of His own Son to be our sacrificed Savior. And there is no greater honor we can give Him than to extend kindness to others in His name, thus bringing Him glory. That is His will.There is this story about theological students at Harvard who were preparing for the ministry. They were taking their final examination on the topic of Kant’s Moral Imperative. Immanuel Kant was a French moral philosopher. The final examination for this class gave the students two hours to write their under- standing of Kant’s philosophy on why men do should good to others. He called it his “categorical imperative.” The students wrote furiously for fifty five minutes. Then the bell rang, giving them a short break; the students all went out into the hallway. There in the hallway was another student, not part of their class, sitting hunched over on the floor, disheveled and unkempt. He hung his head down low like he’d just lost his last friend. The ministerial students were busy in conversation with each other, getting a drink of water, taking bathroom breaks. Then they reentered the classroom for the second hour of writing on what it meant to be a morally responsible human being. Weeks later, they received their test results: they had all failed. All the students thought that their test was what they wrote for two hours in the classroom. The professor meanwhile was standing out in the hallway during the ten minute break, grading them on whether they approached the dejected man with mercy or a kind word. Nobody did. BELIEVE IN THE VALUE OF OTHER PEOPLE People in our modern world speak and act toward others in the most discourteous and insensitive ways. Lynne Truss writes that we are in an age of “social autism” in which we no longer see others’ needs but can’t see the value of imagining their value. Blatant disregard for the sensibilities of others is to devalue them as not deserving of respect or consideration. Somerset Maughan was a great author in the early 20th century. It was said that his mother was an exceptionally beautiful woman and his father was quite ugly. Once a family friend asked how such a beautiful woman could have married such an ugly man She replied, "He has never once hurt my feelings." How we view other people is critical to how we treat them. From God’s vantage point, every one is valuable. If you want to obey the Lord in this matter of kindness, you’re going to need a redeemed way of looking at them. Some people can be quite unlovable, making it more difficult to extend kindness to them. Very often we mistakenly prejudge people, and then go on to treat them just like we think they deserve. Remember when you were lost in sin, guilt and your spiritual death sentence? The Bible says that while you were yet a sinner Christ died for you. If God loves sinners and saints alike, what would make you think it’s okay to be prejudiced against either? Some years ago, The Archbishop of Canterbury was rushing to catch a train in London. In his haste, he accidentally jumped on the wrong passenger car and found himself on a car full of inmates from a mental hospital. They were all dressed in mental hospital clothing. Just as the train pulled out of the station, an orderly came in and began to count the inmates, “1-2-3-4…” when suddenly he saw this distinguished looking gentleman there wearing a business suit and a clerical collar and he said: “Who are you?” The answer came back: “I am the Archbishop of Canterbury!” And the orderly said: “5-6-7-8.” Here’s a very simple idea, right from the pages of Corinthians: ask the Lord to help you look at every person you see as someone for whom He died. Some of you will remember Dr. Paul Tournier was a Swiss psychiatrist, a man of profound spirituality and a committed Christian. He wrote these profoundly sensitive and beautiful words: "Take me seriously, Even if I don't have a college degree, take me seriously. Even if I'm a laborer, take me seriously. Even if I am a woman, take me seriously. If I'm an immigrant, take me seriously. Even if I have no money, take me seriously. Or if I'm a little child, take me seriously. Recognize me as a person with something valid to say. Take me seriously. I am not a nobody. I am a somebody." Kindness is not for those who deserve it, but for those who need it. It is the perfect will of God, as exemplified in the earthly life and ministry of Jesus, that we would be kind toward others. And we are precisely because they are valuable human beings made in His image, damaged though they are by sin, they are worthy of the redeeming blood of Christ. And, through the testimony of our kindness, they may well come to discover His love for them. I am hoping to capture some of the breadth of the Bible’s teaching on kindness beyond our key verse in Colossians. So I feel that I should add that our kindness should extend also, and perhaps particularly, to those who are our enemies. When Shannon Ethridge was 16 years old, an act of forgiveness and love changed her life forever. While driving to her high school one day, Ethridge ran over Marjorie Jarstfar, a woman who was riding her bicycle along a country road. Marjorie died as a result, and Ethridge, who was found completely at fault by authorities, was consumed by intense guilt. She contemplated suicide several times, but she never took her life because of the healing response of one man: Gary, Jarstfar's husband. Gary forgave the 16-year-old asking the attorney to drop all charges against her, saving her from a probable guilty verdict. Instead, he simply asked that Ethridge continue on in the godly footsteps that his wife had taken. "You can't let this ruin your life," Gary told her 20 years ago. "God wants to strengthen you through this. In fact, I am passing Marjorie's legacy on to you." Gary's act of forgiveness showed Ethridge the amazing love of God. Today, Ethridge is the bestselling author of several Christian books, including one entitled Completely His: Loving Jesus Without Limits, written to help wounded and guilt-ridden women to find hope in the Lord. If you value people as God values them, Matthew 25 teaches, every act of kindness to them is an act of kindness to the Lord. Inasmuch as you did it to one of the least of these… BELIEVE IN THE VALUE OF SMALL OBEDIENCE'S The pre-requisite of being kind is being humble. When I am humble I realize that I am no different from the other people to whom I am called to be kind are. When I am impatient, begrudging and stingy toward others I am essentially saying I am better than they. I may in fact be better off at the moment, but every one of the character flaws, immaturity issues and tough circumstances I see in others are reflections of the same things I go through. The humble heart will not judge, but will remember how kind God (and others) were to me when I needed them. When faced with a God-given opportunity to share kindness with someone, the Christian can simply ask himself, What would it be like if I were broke, or depressed, or hurt, or lost a loved one, or was going through a divorce, or struggling with a temptation that seemed to have me beaten? Eric Hoffer wrote that “Kindness can become its own motive. We are made kind by being kind.” I think what that means is that whenever I don’t feel like being kind, the problem is in me. In that case I am called as a Christian to push through, be kind and perform kindness in the name of the Lord, and in that obedience I can believe I will become even kinder. So kindness demands of us a humble mindset—again, so biblical! When God has His people walking in humility and gratitude for His kindness toward them, it’s a very natural thing for them to be kind to others. It just happens. If you’ve been a Christian for 10 or 20 years and you have not yet learned to be kind, you’ve been skipping school! Kindness is the fruit of His indwelling Spirit. The other thing about kindness is it is not the virtue of superheroes. Kind people, precisely because they already understand theirs is to put others above themselves, are not out to become famous or honored for their kindnesses. A person who does kind-looking things in order to be noticed and applauded was anything but kind. You see, God’s plan is to impress those who don’t yet know and love Him by using the small acts of kindness done by those who do. Please never think that the small acts of obedient kindness you perform are insignificant. They are massively important in God’s economy. The effect of a single act of kindness and mercy is immeasurable. William Wordsworth said, The best portions of a good person's life are the little, nameless, unremembered acts of kindness and love. Drop a pebble in the water, And its ripples reach out far, And the sunbeams dancing on them, May reflect them to a star. Give a smile to someone passing, Thereby making his morning glad, It may greet you in the evening When your own heart may be sad. Do a deed of simple kindness, Though its end you may not see, It may reach like widening ripples Down a long eternity. Conclusion Do your little bit and trust God to make the ripples. Review your life today. Scrutinize yourself to see if the fruit of kindness is becoming daily more evident. Not so much Am I doing kind things more and more, and if not I need to get on the stick. Deeper than that—Am I becoming kind? Is the Lord’s work in my heart manifest? Insofar as it is, thank God and ask Him to make you even more kind. If it is not, bring Him a penitent heart and an honest request: Renew a right spirit in me. This teaching, all that you just heard, will mean nothing to you or to God’s kingdom if you don’t take it to heart. Your God and your Redeemer calls you to a radical commitment to Him and His purposes through your life.       [Back to Top]