God's Purpose for Marriage

Stats Tell a Story

There are 277 divorces per hour, 6,646 divorces per day, 46,523 divorces per week, and 2,419,196 divorces per year.

The divorce rate of those age 50 and older has doubled and for those over 65 it has tripled.

It turned out to be a 200 year old copy of the Declaration of Independence, one commission to be printed by John Quincy Adams in 1820.

After looking it over, he had a suspicion it might be pretty old and potentially rare.

They found an old shoe box that had very ornate oriental vase inside. figuring it was probably worth something, they took it to get it appraised.

The divorce rate of those age 50 and older has doubled and for those over 65 it has tripled.

They were astounded when it was appraised for over $9 million.

Turns out it was

Just 2 days prior it hung on the garage of another man who’s wife had told him to clean out the garage and get rid of the clutter, he had purchased it for $10 10 years before.

One out of every 2 marriages fail.

The document later was sold to an investment firm for $477,650.

Something they had no clue their parents even owned was now going to make them wealthy.

What seemed like an old, insignificant piece of paper was actually a treasure in disguise.

They decided to auction it off and to their astonishment a collection of Chinese collectors began a bidding war.

40 percent of those ages 18-34 believe marriage is obsolete.

The war ended with the vase selling for over $80 million dollars.

Something they

Is it possible that marriage is obsolete, broken beyond repair?

Or maybe we just don’t know how to be married. Maybe we don’t really even know what marriage is.

Things haven’t changed much in 2000 years, Jesus dealt with the same mis understanding about marriage then too.

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The Pharisees ask Jesus if you can divorce for any reason

There were two views amongst the pharisees concerning the understanding of

Was it saying a husband could divorce his wife if he found “anything” indecent with her

One side understood Deu

Or was it saying there must be something “indecent” with her, particularly sexual infidelity.

They were trying to get Jesus caught up in a debate so they could pick him apart.

This, unfortunately, is a common question in our culture as well

How can I get out of this mess?

How can I escape this hopeless situation?

What are my “acceptable options” for moving on?

There are loads of stats on the reason people divorce

Here is one study’s reasons for Divorce today:

Lack of commitment 73%

Argue too much 56%

Infidelity 55%

Married too young 46%

My goal today is not to paint a picture that marriage is easy and that you need to grit your teeth, put a smile on your face and act like everything is okay.

Unrealistic expectations 45%

Lack of equality in the relationship 44%

I also realize that some of the things I am going to say today are going to be hard for some to hear.

Lack of preparation for marriage 41%

Abuse 25%

My purpose today is not to point the reasons for divorce in Scripture, but to, prayerfully, show you the magnificent purpose God has for marriage.

My prayer is that by seeing God’s purpose for marriage that we will fight to restore marriage in our culture and that the marriages represented today (and the ones that will come later) will be stronger as we embrace that purpose in our marriages.

There are many people here today that have gone through divorce:

My goal is not to pile guilt and shame on you over your divorce.

Our God is a God of redemption and the Gospel is good news even when it concerns our relationship histories.

He makes all things new, and my prayer is that God will restore your broken past and redeem your future.

I also realize there are people here today in the midst of the pain and despair of marriages that seem to be hopeless. Two things:

I hope and pray that this message will give you hope, whether or not your marriage survives or not. You have a Father in heaven who loves you and intends to use everything in your life for His glory and for your good. Rest in Romans 8:28

Romans 8:28 ESV

28 And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.

You are not defined by the circumstances of your life.

Your identity is not “a divorcee” — you are a child of God, dearly loved by your father in heaven.

You are not a “broken vessel — In God shows us that He is a God who takes what is broken and makes it new and beautiful.

God hates divorce but He doesn’t hate you.

Go

I pray God will restore you marriage. Keep praying, but pursue Jesus more than your spouse.

My goal today is to answer the question “What is the purpose of Marriage?”

What is Marriage?

If order for me to answer that question we have to understand where marriage comes from.

What

I) Marriage is God’s Creation.

Jesus does something in that we must take note of:

Matthew 19:4–5 ESV

4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?

matt 19:4

He answers the Pharisee’s questions by going back to creation.

There were 2 differing understandings for why you would

Reasons for Divorce today:

Lack of commitment 73%

Argue too much 56%

Infidelity 55%

Married too young 46%

Unrealistic expectations 45%

Lack of equality in the relationship 44%

Lack of preparation for marriage 41%

Abuse 25%

Read

We learn 3 things about God’s design of marriage in this passage:

1) God designed the standards of marriage.

This is a zoomed in account of the creation of mankind.

It started with a man, Adam.

After God had given Adam his duty as the caregiver of creation he tells Adam “You are insufficient, incomplete by yourself, you need someone else, a helpmate.”

He then parades animals in front of Adam, who give each a name, but doesn’t find any of them to be a suitable helpmate.

After putting Adam to sleep, God makes Eve from Adam’s rib and when Adam wakes up he sees her and proclaims “WO-MAN!!”

In Adams words we see the first example of God’s handiwork in the design of marriage.

God designed man and woman and brought them together in a beautiful and God-honoring union.

- God designed man and woman and brought them together in a beautiful and God-honoring union.

God designed marriage to be between One Man and One Woman.

In a culture that wants to redefine marriage, we are not fighting a political war, we are EMBRACING a GOD DESIGNED STANDARD of marriage.

2) God designed the commitment of marriage.

“Man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife”

Marriage is not just a step in a relationship, it is a change of allegiance and a change of responsibility.

Grow up and take responsibility.

Marriage is primarily a picture of God’s love for us.

Co-habitation has grown by 900% over the past 50 years.

This is an issue of commitment.

We want all the benefits of marriage without the commitment.

But research shows that people who co-habitate are 50% more likely to divorce.

not clinging to other women/men, a job, a dream of the future.

He spoke this commitment over the first marriage

“SHALL LEAVE HIS PARENT” Adam didn’t have parents to leave, he didn’t have other responsibilities or allegiances to leave behind.

This was God DESIGNING the commitment.

3) God designed the union of marriage.

Marriage is primarily a picture of God’s love for us.

“the two shall become one flesh”

One flesh is more than, but not less than sex.

One flesh is the binding of two into one.

God made that a part of marriage, you are a part of one another and that is not something to take lightly.

Jesus adds in

Matthew 19:6 ESV

6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.”

God has brought these two people together and made them ONE FLESH.

If your life is not heading in the same trajectory as your spouse or your soon to be spouse, then your marriage is outside of God’s design.

This is why divorce is so painful, it is the tearing apart of two souls that have been knit together by God.

II) Marriage is for God’s Glory

Modern weddings have the tendency to put the focus on the couple and their romantic love for one another.

They become the center of attention and the stars of the show.

The average cost of a wedding in KY in 2018 was $17,357 with the overwhelming majority spent on the reception that follows the wedding.

But what happens after that 3-6 hours is the most significant part of a marriage and the true purpose of marriage.

We wrap the purpose for marriage around the feelings two people have for one another, and when those feelings change we have to start it all over again.

Paul shows us the purpose of marriage in

Read

Paul makes refere

1) Marriage is a picture of Jesus and the Church.

vs 23 - Head of wife as Christ is head of church

vs 24 - submit to husband as church submits to Christ.

vs 25 - Husband love wives as Christ loved the church.

vs 28-29 - Nourish and care for your wife as with your body as Christ cares for His Body the Church.

vs 32 - the mystery is profound, it refers to Christ and the Church.

What is the relationship Jesus has with the Church.

2) Marriage puts on display Christ’s unwavering love for His people.

“Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.”

John 3:16 ESV

16 “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.

Romans 5:8 ESV

8 but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.

Our marriages have a mission: To show those who see them the love of Jesus for His people.

It is not an emotional, romantic love that comes and goes.

The church is not always easy to love.

Your love for your spouse is not a feeling that comes and goes with the passing time or the increase in weight.

You married a person whose body is going to change, whose personality quirks are going to drive you mad at times, whose sin is going to hurt you, whose weaknesses are going to require your patience and help.

But that is the beauty of love, it is a choice we make, a commitment we make every day to love and serve and sacrifice.

3) Marriage is a display of Christ’s unconditional commitment to His people.

Christ will never leave His wife.

John 10:28 ESV

28 I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.

Philippians 1:6 ESV

6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

John 17

Wedding vows often say “for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part...”

I don’t pretend to know your situation, but I know God’s design and purpose for marriage.

You can’t change your spouse, but you can change your perspective and your purpose.

You were not promised a perfect romance and a happily-ever-after.

The purpose of marriage is not our happiness, it is to make much of a holy, gracious, powerful, magnificent, and loving God.

We whom deserve death have been given life in Christ Jesus.

I am not saying stay in an abusive relationship, but

Response:

Pray for your marriage: now or future.

Pray for other marriages in our church

Pray that God would restore marriage and that marriages here would embrace the design and purpose God has for them.