Family chat part 2

FAMILY CHAT PART 2

PART 2

NOW I AM COMING TO YOU FOR THE THIRD TIME, AND I WILL NOT BE A BURDEN TO YOU. I DON'T WANT WHAT YOU HAVE—I WANT YOU. AFTER ALL, CHILDREN DON'T PROVIDE FOR THEIR PARENTS. RATHER, PARENTS PROVIDE FOR THEIR CHILDREN.

I WILL GLADLY SPEND MYSELF AND ALL I HAVE FOR YOU, EVEN THOUGH IT SEEMS THAT THE MORE I LOVE YOU, THE LESS YOU LOVE ME.

INTRODUCTION

Good Morning Southpointe, We are in this series Family chat and I hope that each family is doing their part not just to win this great furniture over here but to enrich their family life.

The family culture is so strange, the northern, the southern, the western, and eastern.

We all have different way on raising our families. But I am pretty sure that at one time in your life what Apostle Paul is saying here to this church, you have been in his shoes.

Apostle Paul is talking to the church of Corinth and He is very disappointed in their actions and their lifestyle.

For I am afraid that when I come I won't like what I find, and you won't like my response. I am afraid that I will find quarreling, jealousy, anger, selfishness, slander, gossip, arrogance, and disorderly behavior.

Yes, I am afraid that when I come again, God will humble me in your presence. And I will be grieved because many of you have not given up your old sins. You have not repented of your impurity, sexual immorality, and eagerness for lustful pleasure.

This is what I want to put in the context of this subject. Apostle Paul is the father of this church, the people attending this church are like his children.

He has told them over and over about giving their lives to God and becoming all that God wants them to be. And how they should be living and the moment he is not around then they will go back to living in disobedient.

I believe that there’s not a parent thru out history that at one time or another, has or will be feeling the same way that Apostle Paul was at this time.

One of the strange dynamics in family life is that when children grow up they often repeat the mistakes of their families.

Apostle Paul was not always a good guy.

One of the strange dynamics in family life is that when children grow up they often repeat the mistakes of their families.

The truth is that what we know about marriage and parenting for good or bad we learned in our homes.

The end result is that dysfunctional families can create dysfunctional families often for generations.

I believe that this is at least a part of what the Bible is speaking of when it says in

'The LORD is slow to anger and filled with unfailing love, forgiving every kind of sin and rebellion. But He does not excuse the guilty. He lays the sins of the parents upon their children; the entire family is affected—even children in the third and fourth generations.'

You know that I am a big Charlie Brown’s fan

One of the strange dynamics in family life is that when children grow up they often repeat the mistakes of their families. The truth is that what we know about marriage and parenting for good or bad we learned in our homes. The end result is that dysfunctional families can create dysfunctional families often for generations. I believe that this is at least a part of what the Bible is speaking of when it says in , that God visits “…. the iniquity of the fathers on the children to the third and fourth generation” (NKJV).

Which way is your Deck Chair Facing?

There’s something about the cartoon strip, "Peanuts" that will make you laugh but also make you think.

There’s something about the cartoon strip, "Peanuts" that can evoke a chuckle while simultaneously piercing our conscience. That’s what happened to me when I discovered a profound message in one of Charles Schultz’s comic strips.

Charlie Brown was sitting in a deck chair near the front of a large boat when Lucy walked up. And she said "Some people go through life with the deck chairs facing forward, gazing out where they are going and others go through life with their deck chair facing backwards, looking at where they’ve been."

She then paused and looks directly into Charlie Brown’s sunglasses she asked him, "Charlie Brown, which way is your deck chair facing?"

Charlie Brown responded simply, "I really don’t know—I’ve never been able to get my deck chair unfolded!"

When it comes to the directions that we are set up for our family, it is very important in the direction the deck chair faces. It is toward God or away from God?

Your Family Values are being formed.

Today I want to help you build values that reflect Godly influence. It isn’t going to be easy – but its not impossible if you understand what you face and what you must do.

Hanging By a Thread by David Boehl

We face a real challenge. About a generation ago the demographic group known as the Baby Boomers started an experiment in life. This experiment was based on new and different values. They broke from “traditional” values and they were based on new ideas and new freedoms which have been promoted, pushed, and hyped with unrelenting enthusiasm and energy.

Politicians, educators, lawyers, doctors, business executives, Hollywood filmmakers, book publishers, newspaper and magazine editors, perhaps even some key religious leaders, have all been engaged in selling us these new values.

David Boehl in an article called “Hanging by a Thread” laid these values out in seven statements:

1. Personal happiness the main goal

Personal happiness, fulfillment, and independence are the highest goals for any person.

2. Marriage for life old-fashioned

The idea of marrying someone for life is old-fashioned.

Divorce is not harmful, but should be encouraged if couples are not compatible. We should not worry about how divorce affects children; they have a remarkable ability to adapt to hardship.

3. Traditional roles are confining and outdated

Women should be encouraged to pursue careers and personal fulfillment, and it is unfair to view men as leaders of their homes.

4. Teenagers should make their own choices

Parents should be encouraged to begin ’letting go’ of their children as they begin adolescence. Then these teenagers can began to make their own, independent choices.

5. There is no such thing as absolute morality

We encourage each individual to experience sexual freedom by setting aside biblical morals regarding premarital sex, extramarital sex, and homosexuality. We must embrace tolerance for any lifestyle an individual chooses.

6. Question all authority at every opportunity

7. The influence of Christianity should be eliminated from public life

Reaping the Whirlwind

For they have sown the wind, and they shall reap the whirlwind

There is nothing that is new with these values and ideas. Hosea preached about the same kind of problems in his day – and that was over 2500 years ago.

There is nothing all that new with these values and ideas. Hosea preached about the same kind of problems in his day – and that was over 2500 years ago.

Over those 2500 years cultures have risen and fallen. Societies have been built and then decayed. Nations have been established and then ruined. The values of the people made all the difference.

The further away from Godly values the more likely the society is to be wrecked like a ship on a rocky coast.

In this message today I’d like to give you three steps to take that will help you unfold the deckchair and face it toward God!

His serious, seven-page speech was trivialized by focusing on one sentence in which Quayle criticized the television character Murphy Brown. The real substance of Quayle’s speech went mostly unreported.

For example: When we were young, it was fashionable to declare war against traditional values. Indulgence and self-gratification seemed to have no consequences.

Many of our generation glamorized casual sex and drug use, evaded responsibility, and trashed authority."

Dan Quayle, 1992

For making this statement and taking this position he was marginalized and treated as a dunce, stupid, foolish, and a dunderhead.

In this message today I’d like to give you three steps to take that will help you unfold the deckchair and face it toward God!

Let us determine that we will build our families on values that are God directed and life giving.

1. Remember My Words

Deut 11:18 "So commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these words of mine. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders.

When Moses said this he spoke to a nation of people who had escaped from Egyptian slavery. They had lived there for 400 years. That’s a long time to build up cultural identity and to buy into social values that were different than God’s values.

When Moses said this he spoke to a nation of people who had escaped from Egyptian slavery. They had lived there for 400 years. That’s a long time to build up cultural identity and to buy into societal values that were different than God’s values.

Moses is saying to the Israelites that they are to trust God and His words not the superstitions and foolishness of the past ways.

Moses is saying to the Israelites that they are to trust God and His words not the superstitions and foolishness of the past ways.

Our primary source for God directed values is His word. He has given us two great foundational statements. The first is the Ten Commandments.

They missed the point but understood the importance of God’s teaching!

Our primary source for God directed values is his word. He has given us two great foundational statements. The first is commonly referred to as the Ten Commandments.

1) No other gods before God 2) Create no image of another god 3) No abuse of God’s name 4) Work six days and rest one 5) Honor your Father and Mother 6) No murder 7) No adultery 8) No stealing 9) No lying about your neighbor 10) No coveting of anything your neighbor possesses.

The 10 Commandments with a promise of good and long life

No other gods before God

Create no image of another god

No abuse of God’s name

Work six days and rest one

But Jesus comes along and He really simplify it:

Honor your Father and Mother

No murder

No adultery

Jesus replied, "'You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.'

No stealing

This is the first and greatest commandment.

No lying about your neighbor

A second is equally important: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'

The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments."

No coveting of anything your neighbor possesses

Jesus summed up all of the core values and teachings in two powerful statements. Here is all the law.

But when you read Exodus and Deuteronomy you don’t get a nice little list that is easily chiseled on a set of stone tablets.

What exactly was chiseled on stone and carried by Moses from the mountain is uncertain. It obviously outlined a set of basic standards that formed the core values of the entire nation of Israel.

In the entire law you will find many promises from God of how living according to these standards will bring you both good and long life on the earth.

Here is the fundamental foundation of a way to live and in truth it is the cornerstone of western law.

But there is another foundational statement

1st Step: Remember My Words

This is the first and most important command.

And the second command is like the first: ‘Love your neighbor as you love yourself.’

All the law and the writings of the prophets depend on these two commands.”

Jesus summed up all of the core values and teachings in two powerful statements. Here is all the law.

It’s simple. It’s powerful. It’s direct. It’s so important to live this ourselves because you can’t teach something that you are not living out.

2. Teach them to your children

Deut 11:19 Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up.

It’s clear that God expects us as parents to teach our kids about His values and His ideas in every aspect of life. Values are not just taught but they are caught.

It’s clear that God expects us as parents to teach our kids about His values and His ideas in every aspect of life.

Values are not taught in a classroom. Values are caught the same way you catch a virus, pick up the smell of smoke at a campfire.

You don’t teach values you marinate like you do a piece of meat. You soak it in the sauce until it picks up the flavor.

You don’t teach values you marinate like you do a piece of meat. You soak it in the sauce until it picks up the flavor.

So I am asking you to write out your own family value list, this is your discussion point for this week and post some of your list to your Facebook post.

It could be around 45 words statement about your family value.

For example:

We openly admire God! We focus our lives around Jesus’ church and His people.

Dennis Rainey’s Family Values List

Dennis Rainey is a Christian author and speaker who has done his best to marinate his kids in God’s Values for his family.

Sensing a lot of confusion about what "family values" are, local newspaper editor made a challenge: "

Send a 45-word statement about your thoughts on family values." So one night he, his wife, Barbara and his kids wrote out what they thought their family values were—what they as a family felt was important, The words starting popping like premium popcorn and Dennis’s son, Samuel acted as the scribe to wrote it all down. This is the list.

Another teacher and author came up with another list of his family’s core values. Actually he’s not nearly as famous or so important. But now that we are past the parenting age and into the grandparenting age – I can now speak with some authority without as much fear about my kids showing me up! And when the grandkids mess up – it’s not my fault!

Rick & Donna Stacy’s Family Values

We openly admire God

Gabe and “Arrgh” Now where did he get that? We all know – but it took Rob a few days to figure it out! Eventually he went “arrgh” and then went – Oh!

It’s not the big things – it’s the little things consistently displayed in your life. That’s why you don’t are not to curse God and you don’t give your worship to another idol…Apathy toward God and neglect of worship is the seed of sin

We focus our lives around Jesus’ church and His people

We bring our tithes. We give our time. The church is the center of our lives and we love it here with our church family!

If you come to church & then go home griping and complaining about what happened at church, chances are pretty good your child will grow up as a pagan.

You know, kids are pretty good at picking up on inconsistencies in our lives. If you come to church & pray, & then go home & cuss like a sailor; or if you come to church.

You will tear down any testimony you have for the Lord Jesus Christ if you don’t respect the church, which is His body.

Or it could be some like this: We remember what we are to be about: People – not stuff; Giving – not consuming; and Serving – not demanding.

We live in a dangerous world – be wise and watchful. Don’t make the mistake of thinking that everything out there aimed at your children is benign and safe.

Know the word of God and compare it with what we’re seeing around us.

Listen, if we don’t protect our kids today we’re exposing them to moral cyanide. There is a cultural war going on the likes of which are incredible. So monitor what they watch on television. Know what they’re being taught at school. Listen to their music and ban what you need to ban from your house. We banned a lot of music from our home and MTV was blocked from our TV – period and without apology.

We remember what we are to be about: People – not stuff; Giving – not consuming; and Serving – not demanding

Let me encourage you to sit down with your spouse and your kids and talk about your family values.

When we “mess up” – we “fess up” and keep moving God’s way.

This week Donna and I had a conversation about who we are giving our best to. Somehow she thought that she should get my best.

I had come home tired and beat several days in a row and she was – appropriately – feeling like maybe I should save some of my best time for her.

I had to make a promise to do better.

There will be times you need to talk with your kids – that’s why we tried very hard to make supper time the gathering, sharing, telling, connecting time for our family. Everyone got a chance every supper time to tell about what’s been happening in their corner of the world.

Let me encourage you to sit down with your mate and your kids and talk about your family values. You might even want to make a list – at least think about what you want your family to be about!

3. Write them on your doors and gates.

Deut 11:20 Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates,

Deut 11:21 so that as long as the sky remains above the earth, you and your children may flourish in the land the LORD swore to give your ancestors.

I don’t believe you need to write on your houses the core values of your family.

The ancient Egyptians had the lintels and doorposts of their doors and gates inscribed with sentences indicative of a favorable omen and this is still the case, for in Egypt and other Mohammedan countries, the front doors of houses (in Cairo, for instance) are painted red, white, and green, bearing conspicuously inscribed upon them such sentences from the Koran, as “God is the Creator.”…Moses designed to turn this ancient and favorite custom to a better account and ordered that, instead of the former superstitious inscriptions, there should be written the words of God, persuading and enjoining the people to hold the laws in perpetual remembrance.

Again, I don’t believe you need to write on your houses the core values of your family. There is a house on Dobie Road that apparently disagrees with this view. I’m not sure what’s going on here!

Still we are to mark our lives with the Godly values. When you fill your minutes with core values surrounding God’s values and they become hours. The hours become days. The days become weeks. The weeks become months. The months become years. The years become a lifetime – good, rich, and without regret.

I do believe we should write our family value on the doorpost and gates of our children’s hearts.

Michael W. Smith said this about his father. "WHEN MY DAD COMES UP missing at a dinner party, I always know where to find him: in the kitchen. He’ll be in there, apron around his waist, washing dishes.

God made husbands and wives to become one body and one spirit for his purpose—so they would have children who are true to God.

That’s just one example of his servant’s heart. Serving seems to come naturally and effortlessly for my father. I remember one time he was working in the garage and he saw an elderly lady carrying a bag of groceries by our house.

Michael W. Smith is a very popular contemporary Christian soloist. Here is what he said about his father. "WHEN MY DAD COMES UP missing at a dinner party, I always know where to find him: in the kitchen. He’ll be in there, apron around his waist, washing dishes. That’s just one example of his servant’s heart. Serving seems to come naturally and effortlessly for my father. I remember one time he was working in the garage and he saw an elderly lady carrying a bag of groceries by our house. He immediately went out to help her. Time and again, I’ve watched him drop whatever he was doing to help someone carry a bag of groceries, fix a car or repair a broken appliance. I hope someday I’ll be as good at serving others as he is. If that happens, I’ll have to say, ‘I learned it from my dad.’"

He immediately went out to help her. Time and again, I’ve watched him drop whatever he was doing to help someone carry a bag of groceries, fix a car or repair a broken appliance.

I hope someday I’ll be as good at serving others as he is. If that happens, I’ll have to say, ‘I learned it from my dad.’"

I like the story of a little boy who was asked if he believed in God. He answered, “Well, yes I do.” When asked why, he said, “Well, I guess it just runs in the family.”

I like the story of a little boy who was asked if he believed in God. He answered, “Well, yes I do.” When asked why, he said, “Well, I guess it just runs in the family.”

I hope it runs in your family, too.

But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.

Oh this is your memory verse for this week>