Find Purity in Christ that Makes Relationships Flourish
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Dear Congregation of our Lord Jesus Christ,
I h
As God renews us by His Holy Spirit we become people who though once living out of God’s imaging being shattered in us - now more and more we live out of being made according to the pattern of God’s image in perfect humanity, we bear the image of the Son of Man! That’s the beautiful truth of 3rd use of the law and the result of the gospel, why we do good works! We’ve seen how this works in the place we are to give God in our lives, way we are to worship, when and how. Beautiful truth that Jesus shows us in his prayer life, his being in God’s Word, his obedience and service, and loving compassion, brave boldness in standing up for truth - Christ’s Spirit is going to work that model of relating to God in us!
Butthen we switched otthe sedond table of the law and saw that just as hnouring God making him weighty in our lives is the foundatin head from which all the others streams of action to God flows, so too hnoouring the relationships God set up in out lives and in partiicular respecting and working forthe preciousness of others is the fountina from which all other behaviour in our relatinoships is to flow - bitterness, grugdge, jealusy hating, much less outward attack, slander and murder. Spirit has major repair work to do in us, stengthening to live in new way. So too now we see that inthe areao f human sexuality - every single one of us, though created in th image of God to reflect His character and goodness and lto outwardly act promioting his glory and to enjoy himforever. , that sin and the fallenness that it introduced, means taht every signle one of us, married, sigle, young people old people. We all come to this part of our lives with some brokenness and even with sin, and we need not only forgiveness but we need the Spirit of God to re-build this part of our lives that we might live for His glory as male and female, as those en-gnedered by God, recreated after the image of Christ, and as bodies who hva ebeen indwelt by the Holy Spirit and become temples of the Holy Spirit. And the one word for married or single that we are all called to is purity. Sexual purity!
Key Truth: Sexual purity is about sexual desire and behaviour serving the people and purposes God’s created them for!
And though we must get to some basic with definitions that our clture has strayed from, I don’t want to begin with definitions, but rather with the Biblical story.
Again, we must begin with definitions.
A. The Biblical Story presents Marriage Instituted by God as the Context for Sex, Marriage Shattered, and Marriage Redeemed!
God creates the first man in his image. Is he a full image bearer capable of relfecting God and enjoying him without sexual desire or sexual behaviour? The answer is yes. Itis all very good. Is it possible for a person to be unmarried without outward sexual behvoiur, and pure in his or her desire as a aman or am woman - well jesus was. Others lifted up as people fully reflecting God without sex or marriage, adn with purity in their sexual desire. But God then creates Eve from teh rib of Adam and breathes into her the breathe of life - is she fully in God’s image yes. But God engenders her differently and we can see that in this world - need both genders - equal but different and as Paul says in
Nevertheless, in the Lord woman is not independent of man nor man of woman; for as woman was made from man, so man is now born of woman. And all things are from God.
Paul goes back to creation and though he will teach different roles, he is so clear that their is a mutual need in this world for both gender and neither is idnependent, in fact could say more fullly togeeher with both the image of God , than indepnendly seperate if just one gender. And this is part of what God’s Word means when it says in this perfect creation when just Adam was there something was not good, that being alone. Need others, Need man and woman. need community - diversity and unity. But then God by his designs institutes something that we could say is an added bonus to this beatufiul world and that is marriage. It is not something is necessary to reflect God’s image, you are not incomplete without, it is not a command that all must be married. Children, some adults, some who have lost spouses for whatever reason don’t want to, can’t, and sometimes should not marry. And certainly in heaven, we will see that marriage is not a forever state, its not like the Mormon think the end all and be all.
For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven.
But God instituted marriage and gave it as a beautiful gift that would serve His purpose of mirroring his love and creating households taht would not only mirror his love but also even reproduce other creatures that would mirror His image to the world!
Did he not make them one, with a portion of the Spirit in their union? And what was the one God seeking? Godly offspring. So guard yourselves in your spirit, and let none of you be faithless to the wife of your youth.
Now back to the story: God creates man and woman both in his image - we have our task together as his image bearers. But God also opens this possibilty of marriage up - He brings Eve to Adam like a father walking his daughter up the aisle - presents her to Adam - and Adam says - whoah bone of my bone flesh of my flesh - here is one who complememtns me - not from head or toe, but from my side to cherish. NAked and not ashamed - fulness of light and purity clothed -rabbis say. And so with genders, now also sexual desire acted uon and pure giving of them selves - not a self taking but a self giving - and God’s Spirit makes them one - that’s marriage and sexual dsire acted upon in purity for delight and for god’s purposes in a way that glorifies God!
Now what is interesting in God giving His perfect will for this area of our lives si that he doesn’t summarize this law and instuttion for our lives with word zna - to fornicate to commit boroader sex immorality - people that aren’t necessarily married, sexual desire and behaviour outside of the marriage covenant. No God uses the specific word for having sex with another persons spouse. Now of course like murder, that slander, hating, jealousy, manslaughter, recklesss nedagerment of your life or another, - protectin innocent lives later in Exodus, Elv, Deut, later in OT and NT spelled out what speficis are. And so too all sorts of distorted, sinful harmful sexual dsire and beahviour spelled out elsewhere, but what is teh heart of this principle of sexual purity! This is so important to note, the basic principle of sexual purity is taht its not first of all about an individual and their sexual desire or prefences, or behviour. The msot basic principlee of God’s law about sexual prity is taht it is about marriage. It is about about personal reltionships and social relationships.
Now that is very different than what our culture thinks about sexual desire and sexual behaviour isn’t it. Just this past week, CBC, seizedon Mexico, Canadian America free trade agreement, and stqements made by Doug Ford. According to CBC it is irsonsbile and bad science and probably even illegal to hold the idea that their are just two sexes, male and female, and two corresponding genders - male and femlae! Many shades of grey and a whole rainbow of options of how to express teh genders that fit your preference. I don’t want to dbate that herar, but I want you to notice that our culture does not begin withthe covenant context, for which marrriage and sex was designed - the household , covenant reltinhship male and femlebefore the LORD. They begin with individuals and with all of those indivudals with sexual needs and impulses that they must fulfill in their own unique wasys for them to be complete human beings. For many that sexual dsire and fulfillment is their idenitty and it is an indivudal right they are born with.
And where does that bring us as a culture and as it seeps into God’s church family - internet pron for men and women bored with their martial life, too busy for each other, rmance novels escape into, like in jesus days easy divorce that resulted in some living in serial adultery, plygamy. Its led us to people seeking their sexual desire and pleasure and iddnity - without other people, or using other peopel e- hook up cltuure - it’s led to lonely society - taht says sex is for the indivudal outside of marriage. Oneof the sad sideffects of the pill for birth control - not for all but for millions in our land it separeted the idea that sex and marriage were to go hand in hand! Thnk in the sextrade anyone who likes selling their body - some maybe addicted to omeny or to sex itself - but most in that trade often in pain - terribel side effets , Created a world where sexual abuse. where hoomosexuality bisexualtiy bestiality now even robots.
Now think of the context of God giving this law, people of Israel about to enter the pormised land, surroudned by culture where women treated as objects, where relkgion involved prosittiuion, A land they were to take over - and god explictiliy says - don’t take on their detestable practices, abominsations - sex used for anytoher purpose than glorifying me, stenerethening this covenant bond of parteneship and companaionship and le,.ight -of huaband and wife livinng in compelte faithfulness and untiy. Think of the context of teh second giving of the law: God’s poeole literally commited adultery with Midianties.
So why does God speicifually use this word na-af? It is because sex is a crowwinign gift on all the other intimacies that a marriage is supposed to reflect ot hte world. And sex outside marriage is a violation not just of that physical unity but of the whoel relationship it flows out of. And so listen young people, and older people who might say, Well I’m not commiting adultery, i am not using my sexuality in a wa awy that it is with another married perosn and therefore - breaks my marriage -so I must be ok with these other types of sexual immortlity! But the whole point is sexuality is for relatioship, the one God dsigned it for, and when you chose sexual imoorlity, you are chosing to weaknee, attakc and violate the types of relationships God wants for you, both present ones. but also your future relatiships. God forbade all these other types of sexual immoroality because they jeoproadized marriage and future marriage,, band becaus of that they jeoproadize a whoel family and the whole network f relstionship therei, and because itjeopradizing the home the covenant partneship and fiathfulness that kids willb e born into, it is jeoopradizing the Kingdom of God being built among us, across the genreations!
So why does God speicifually use this word na-af? It is because sex is a crowwinign gift on all the other intimacies that a marriage is supposed to reflect ot hte world. And sex outside marriage is a violation not just of that physical unity but of the whoel relationship it flows out of. And so listen young people, and older people who might say, Well I’m not commiting adultery, i am not using my sexuality in a wa awy that it is with another married perosn and therefore - breaks my marriage -so I must be ok with these other types of sexual immortlity! But the whole point is sexuality is for relatioship, the one God dsigned it for, and when you chose sexual imoorlity, you are chosing to weaknee, attakc and violate the types of relationships God wants for you, both present ones. but also your future relatiships. God forbade all these other types of sexual immoroality because they jeoproadized marriage and future marriage,, band becaus of that they jeoproadize a whoel family and the whole network f relstionship therei, and because itjeopradizing the home the covenant partneship and fiathfulness that kids willb e born into, it is jeoopradizing the Kingdom of God being built among us, across the genreations!
So, this is why our NT text states the big deal isn’t just the indivdiual outward behviour, it how our sexual desire or beahviour afect the marriage sna dhousehold that God wants us to support whterher married or unamrried.
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God;
For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each one of you know how to control his own body in holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like the Gentiles who do not know God; that no one transgress and wrong his brother in this matter, because the Lord is an avenger in all these things, as we told you beforehand and solemnly warned you.
Why in termso f the civil punishments for adultery for sexual immorality in OT Israel - these penatlities given for God wehere almost the same as for murder! THe seventh commandment is not just an indiviual command to try to get people to not have armelful sexual desires however we define them, the seventh commandment is even more imoprtanlty about the SANCITTYT Of Marriage. Thoug there is no question sthat sex in marriage in that protected commited giving of each, is good it is not designed first of all just to serve tehindividual pleaure, but the others in self-giving, it is to serve the marriage God builds, it is therefore something that serves God’s church, adn so also serve God’s world!
And so while we may not all be called to marriage, and fi your are it is just for a time, all of us are called to protect marriage for God’s purposes So says:
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.
I’ve told you before how Lewis Smeedes, correctly identifies that defined Christainly adultery is anything that violates a marriage, rips apart covenantla oness of husband and wife. That there are only two typoes of poeople when it comes to sexuality - self-maximaizers who say my desire and satisfiiation my way is what matters - supersize wheir self, pleasure theirneeds, minismize their relationship to God and to others and God’s dfefintaitionand diredction s and good structure. And their are Relationshi-Keepers . And if you are not a relatisihop keeper, really you make other rleatships about a robbery of taking!
And that leads us to the second part that this pcommandment calls us to, not just from sexual immorality, but also to sexual purity. And I would suggest that you’ll never a get aandle on sinful sexual dsire or behavoiour jsut by saying no to them. Just by trying hard. The only way to really deal with sinful sexual dire and behaviour is saying yes ot the purity that Christ sets you free for and gives your the Spirit to Pursue:
B. The Biblical Story presents Marriage Redeemed by Purity in Christ through the Spirit
Now here is a wonder many of us fai to see inthe bible. Story starts in a garden, with a couple, with a marriage. Buthen it unravels and sin right away is pulling marriage apart, Really Satan’s firws ploy, even though right there with each other, he gets busy divdie and conquer. Sin spearates, blame, and struggle for power instead of service in thier diverese roles. Domination and subversion. At the heart of the bilbe is a powerful story that though not pornographic, is erotic. Story about sexual desire and loave and marriage. But if you read those poems, that song carfefully Their is a plot. Where has my lover gone. Don’t awaken love before its time. Problem with in-laws and work. Conflict and miscummunication - Strain and struggle of marriage, but then the end of the book matured commitmed forgivnign, test and true marital love until they come back to that garden, spring time - and theiir love though in a sinful world has been redeemed: And the chorus sings:
Set me as a seal upon your heart, as a seal upon your arm, for love is strong as death, jealousy is fierce as the grave. Its flashes are flashes of fire, the very flame of the Lord.
Mesasge is taht God needs to redeem marriage by re-tooling our hearts - that husband and wives have this kind of love that’s like God’s love for us his peole. And is that kind of Christ-like love that is supposed to work a purity that remakes marriage for Christians. And so as Jesus, upholds and brnigs the seventh commandment back to its fullest intent he says:
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
It is a lie to say taht whatever desire or prefeerence is in my heart, I can only be really happy and find mey true me if I follwo that derise. The heart is deceitful above all thigns. dfolowiong desire willy nilly leads to confusion and river with\out banks, - dstruction. No jesus says this lustful intent is the problem. And when you turn to Christ his Spirit deals with lust that is just self-taking and pays no heed to ultimate good of the other nor to God’s will for your own life. This is why goes onto say:
Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.
For God has not called us for impurity, but in holiness. Therefore whoever disregards this, disregards not man but God, who gives his Holy Spirit to you.
Leon Morris: His sin is seen itn its true light only when it is seen as a prefence for impurtiy rather than the Spirit who is holy. Turning to Christ is being rebuilt with purity, no matter how far you’ve fallen, in Christ that purity is now my idenity - and my heart can’t go whoring after sexual pleassure - my sexuality can only find true expression if in God-blessed coveannt relationship - in pure way he’s dsigned.
Living outo fstep if not sininng notjust against God’s will for others and for marriage and society and your future family, but yourself and Christ who dwells within you: Unique sin against your self and Spirit of purity Christ has given you:
Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body. Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
Within marriage, as well outside of it this means we can’t be dissolute. calvin who had to wait a long time for w awife, and then she got sick , and then his step-kids some marriage trouble - he writes with experience when he says: “You shall not be dissolute. Here the Lrod foorbids any kind of sexual impropritety or immodesty… by marriage alone the Lord joino man and womn. It follows that every other form of union apart from marriage is cursed before him!
Wihtin marriage, as well outside of it this means we can’t be dissolute. calvin who had to wait a long time for w awife, and then she got sick , and then his step-kids some marriage trouble - he writes with experience when he says: “You shall not be dissolute. Here the Lrod foorbids any kind of sexual impropritety or immodesty… by marriage alone the Lord joino man and womn. It follows that every other form of union apart from marriage is cursed before him!
Oppostite of dissolute is ressolute, not just saving yoruself for greatest goal in life - but channel desires for God’s purposes. And this is where there is hope for any who struggle with disorder, disporopitiona sexual dsire. Anyone here - radiant purity in Christ that you can live by
Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
Roamns 13:13-1
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C. The Biblical Story Ends with The Wedding Feast of the Lamb
Need to reiterate what I did at the beginning. Marriage is not forever, and if it is what matters most to people it has become an ideal. Marriage isn’t even ulitamtely just for our good and enjoyment. Marriage is unioni that is supposed to represent the deeper unioin of God with His people.
That’s what Jesus came announcing:
“The kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who gave a wedding feast for his son,
It is not like GOd created the world, male and female, they happened to choose each other and say - why don’twe get together, why don’t we make this relationship marriage -\And then God said neat that’s would be a good way to illustrate the type of relationship I won’t with people. No. Completelythe other way around. God in HIs infitie wisdom and perfect plan and covenant of redemption, God who knew Jessus would be the Lamb Salin so we could say beforethe foundation of the World. God who would choose Iserael in the OT as it were be ahusband towher - and expected the tender love, faithfulness, and the good jealousy spouse are to have to portect their covenant - GOd says I am the Lord your hubsand.
He in His perfect plan when, we had divorced him fallen away, says can’t take you back by my own marriage laws, but I have a new covenant - like Hosea goign to wayward wife - betroth you in … God planning downthe corridors of time - says Jesus will be that great husbandsman - and we His church the bride. Time of betrothal prettymuch over, and the wedding feast aroudn the corner. And God says, I made marriage knowing all this and that isis the unioin with God and His people that will eternaland ultimate - that says - for this time - in this fallen world - I made marriage -with its stresses strains, it scommmitment and forgiveness - it’s joys and trials - I made taht covenant love in marriage to be symbol - that points like a big bill board picture to the wedding feasst of the lamb!
Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out, “Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure”— for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.
And what is the point:
And the angel said to me, “Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb.” And he said to me, “These are the true words of God.”
That is the point, and how each of us hnours and supports, protect marriage as God insittuted, how we use our sexuality only for Gods purposes and glory - it’s to be a sign taht the world says - you really upohod marriage but its because their is a deeper marriage with God that our lives are all about -and that sexual purity you live in - to uphold the instiation of marriage in our society, is a picture of a deeper and broader purity of bleinognig to Christ forever.
