A Heart Set Free 4
A HEART SET FREE # 4
3/16/2002 AND 3/17/2002
(Mid-Life Crisis)
(Credit information from June Hunt-Hope for the Heart)
Psalm 119
32 I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free.
Review
We have been discussing a heart set free and more specifically, solving our identity crisis. We looked at God’s Eternal Purpose, the Mystery of the Ages, and Thinking properly about the new you. We looked at putting off the old self and putting on the new self.
In the future we are going to look at the search for significance. Today I want to approach it from the point of view of solving a mid-life crisis.
EXAMPLE
There is a commercial where a grandpa is talking to his grandchildren. He is looking at their model motorcycle and he starts talking about when he was young and the feeling of the wind in his hair. The grandchildren say, “Did you have a Harley grandpa?” He says, “No, I bought aluminum siding instead.”
-Whether or not he should have bought the Harley, he obviously has some regrets about his choices in life.
-That’s what a mid-life crisis is all about.
-Amazingly I have seen women leave their children for as well as their husband for another man or another life. Men have been doing it for years.
-Even if you are young here today, listen so when you get to mid-life and late life you can say: NO REGRETS.
1. SYMPTOMS OF A MID-LIFE CRISIS
Psalm 102 NLT
A prayer of one overwhelmed with trouble, pouring out problems before the LORD.
1
LORD, hear my prayer!
Listen to my plea!
2
Don't turn away from me
in my time of distress.
Bend down your ear
and answer me quickly when I call to you,
3
for my days disappear like smoke,
and my bones burn like red-hot coals.
4
My heart is sick, withered like grass,
and I have lost my appetite.
5
Because of my groaning,
I am reduced to skin and bones.
6
I am like an owl in the desert,
like a lonely owl in a far-off wilderness.
7
I lie awake,
lonely as a solitary bird on the roof.
8
My enemies taunt me day after day.
They mock and curse me.
9
I eat ashes instead of my food.
My tears run down into my drink
10
because of your anger and wrath.
For you have picked me up and thrown me out.
11
My life passes as swiftly as the evening shadows.
I am withering like grass.
· Sense of loss
· anger
· self-pity
· depression
· anxiety
· fear of aging
· burnout
· feeling trapped
· now or never mentality
· strong desire for change
· attempts to escape in travel or TV or whatever
· trying to dress younger
· preoccupation with your physical body
· withdrawal from close relationships
ETC.
-KRISIS is the word in the original.
-It means a shifting or decision.
-It is a fork in the road. It is a place where a decision must be made.
-Crisis in Chinese is made from the symbols” DANGER/OPPORTUNITY
-A mid-life crisis is a time when someone feels the immediate necessity of re-evaluating your identity, values and goals.
-The changes you make be for better or for worse. It depends on the choices and decisions you make.
-The ROOT CAUSE:
“A feeling that I am trapped in a life that is unfulfilling. I deserve a chance to make changes before it is too late, to discover my own identity and find personal happiness.
-The feeling is: GOD WANTS ME TO BE HAPPY.
-Selfishness jumps up in you and screams to be heard.
-What makes a dad or mom get in a car and drive off and leave their responsibilities and commitments?
Psalm 55
6 I said, "Oh, that I had the wings of a dove! I would fly away and be at rest--
7 I would flee far away and stay in the desert; Selah
8 I would hurry to my place of shelter, far from the tempest and storm."
James 1
8 he is a double-minded man, unstable in all he does.
-RIGHT BELIEF:
My identity is in Jesus. I won’t demand my own desires and dreams. My purpose and identity is hidden in Christ.
David’s Mid-Life Crisis
Acts 13
36 "For when David had served God's purpose in his own generation, he fell asleep; he was buried with his fathers and his body decayed.
-I love using David as an example because we know for sure that he fulfilled God’s purpose.
-That is in spite of a rocky life. He was still a man after God’s heart.
2 Samuel 11 NLT
David and Bathsheba
1The following spring, the time of year when kings go to war, David sent Joab and the Israelite army to destroy the Ammonites. In the process they laid siege to the city of Rabbah. But David stayed behind in Jerusalem.
2Late one afternoon David got out of bed after taking a nap and went for a stroll on the roof of the palace. As he looked out over the city, he noticed a woman of unusual beauty taking a bath. 3He sent someone to find out who she was, and he was told, "She is Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite." 4Then David sent for her; and when she came to the palace, he slept with her. (She had just completed the purification rites after having her menstrual period.) Then she returned home. 5Later, when Bathsheba discovered that she was pregnant, she sent a message to inform David.
6So David sent word to Joab: "Send me Uriah the Hittite." 7When Uriah arrived, David asked him how Joab and the army were getting along and how the war was progressing. 8Then he told Uriah, "Go on home and relax." David even sent a gift to Uriah after he had left the palace. 9But Uriah wouldn't go home. He stayed that night at the palace entrance with some of the king's other servants.
10When David heard what Uriah had done, he summoned him and asked, "What's the matter with you? Why didn't you go home last night after being away for so long?"
11Uriah replied, "The Ark and the armies of Israel and Judah are living in tents,[1] and Joab and his officers are camping in the open fields. How could I go home to wine and dine and sleep with my wife? I swear that I will never be guilty of acting like that."
12"Well, stay here tonight," David told him, "and tomorrow you may return to the army." So Uriah stayed in Jerusalem that day and the next. 13Then David invited him to dinner and got him drunk. But even then he couldn't get Uriah to go home to his wife. Again he slept at the palace entrance.
David Arranges for Uriahs Death
14So the next morning David wrote a letter to Joab and gave it to Uriah to deliver. 15The letter instructed Joab, "Station Uriah on the front lines where the battle is fiercest. Then pull back so that he will be killed." 16So Joab assigned Uriah to a spot close to the city wall where he knew the enemy's strongest men were fighting. 17And Uriah was killed along with several other Israelite soldiers.
18Then Joab sent a battle report to David. 19He told his messenger, "Report all the news of the battle to the king. 20But he might get angry and ask, `Why did the troops go so close to the city? Didn't they know there would be shooting from the walls? 21Wasn't Gideon's son Abimelech killed[2] at Thebez by a woman who threw a millstone down on him?' Then tell him, `Uriah the Hittite was killed, too.' "
22So the messenger went to Jerusalem and gave a complete report to David. 23"The enemy came out against us," he said. "And as we chased them back to the city gates, 24the archers on the wall shot arrows at us. Some of our men were killed, including Uriah the Hittite."
25"Well, tell Joab not to be discouraged," David said. "The sword kills one as well as another! Fight harder next time, and conquer the city!"
-David was: RESTLESS, DISCONTENTED, HE COVERED HIS FAILURE INSTEAD OF CONFESSING IT, HE LISTENED TO HIS FLESH, AND HE WAS IN A VULNERABLE POSITION.
-Compare that to Joseph who ran from Potiphar’s wife. He fled temptation.
2. MOVE FROM CRISIS TO CHRIST
*Face it as a part of life
Ecclesiastes 3
1 ¶ There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace.
What season are you in?
*Accept your mortality
2 Corinthians 4
7But this precious treasure--this light and power that now shine within us--is held in perishable containers, that is, in our weak bodies.[1] So everyone can see that our glorious power is from God and is not our own.
8We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed and broken. We are perplexed, but we don't give up and quit. 9We are hunted down, but God never abandons us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going. 10Through suffering, these bodies of ours constantly share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.
11Yes, we live under constant danger of death because we serve Jesus, so that the life of Jesus will be obvious in our dying bodies. 12So we live in the face of death, but it has resulted in eternal life for you.
13But we continue to preach because we have the same kind of faith the psalmist had when he said, "I believed in God, and so I speak."[2] 14We know that the same God who raised our Lord Jesus will also raise us with Jesus and present us to himself along with you. 15All of these things are for your benefit. And as God's grace brings more and more people to Christ, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory.
16That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are[3] being renewed every day.
*Ask God for His purposes and Goals instead of asking the world
-We sometimes look at a “typical life” and judge ourselves by that.
2 Corinthians 10
12Oh, don't worry; I wouldn't dare say that I am as wonderful as these other men who tell you how important they are! But they are only comparing themselves with each other, and measuring themselves by themselves. What foolishness!
*Eternal values must overcome earthly values
*Make the most of today
-Don’t let your future steal your present.
-We were made to live only in today, not the past or we will be depressed and not the future, or we will be anxious.
Isaiah 40
29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.
30 Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;
31 but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
-John the Baptist is a good example of someone who faced and beat an identity question.
John 1
19 ¶ Now this was John's testimony when the Jews of Jerusalem sent priests and Levites to ask him who he was.
20 He did not fail to confess, but confessed freely, "I am not the Christ."
21 They asked him, "Then who are you? Are you Elijah?" He said, "I am not." "Are you the Prophet?" He answered, "No."
22 Finally they said, "Who are you? Give us an answer to take back to those who sent us. What do you say about yourself?"
23 John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, "I am the voice of one calling in the desert, `Make straight the way for the Lord.'"
-John found himself in Scripture.
-More specifically, he found his identity in relation to Jesus.
-Who are you? What do you say about yourself?
(Possibly read the Marriage Perspective from June Hunt)