Happily Ever After02
Happily Ever After
1/5/02 and 1/6/02
Hebrews 13
4 Marriage should be honoured by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.
1 Corinthians 7
1 ¶ Now for the matters you wrote about: It is good for a man not to marry.
2 But since there is so much immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman her own husband.
3 The husband should fulfil his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.
4 The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.
5 Do not deprive each other except by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.
6 I say this as a concession, not as a command.
7 I wish that all men were as I am. But each man has his own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.
8 Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I am.
9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.
10 ¶ To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.
11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
16 How do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or, how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?
17 ¶ Nevertheless, each one should retain the place in life that the Lord assigned to him and to which God has called him. This is the rule I lay down in all the churches.
1Thessalonians 4:
3 It is God's will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality;
4 that each of you should learn to control his own body {Or learn to live with his own wife; or learn to acquire a wife} in a way that is holy and honourable,
-Last week the Lord really pulled on me to touch on the subject of relationships. Often in a sermon I get some thought in my heart and I can tell God is wanting to bring it out.
-Then I woke up Wednesday morning with several sermons. One was this one, “HAPPILY EVER AFTER”.
-That is how movies end, right? That is a picture of the cowboy getting the girl and they ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after.
1. WHAT IS HAPPILY EVER AFTER?
-The first step is to change our perspective and hope from one of fantasy and Hollywood to reality.
-Don’t lower your standards, RAISE THEM. Just adjust them from the cultural point of view.
-Becky and I have talked about how we were looking for that “FEELING” of being in love to overtake our emotions.
-You don’t have the energy to sustain that level of emotional involvement.
-Besides, that is the lowest level of a relationship. That is a great place to begin but you can’t stay there.
-The Scripture in Hebrews says that marriage should be honored. Our culture doesn’t do that.
-The movies and TV shows portray us as dogs trying to hook up with whatever makes our liver quiver.
-Get God’s future and God’s picture in the Bible.
-Before you can receive God’s plan you have to stop looking for that perfect person.
-Some people have a list. THAT IS STUPID TEACHING. This isn’t 4th grade!
-You look at the outward. You don’t know how to pick a husband or wife.
-I heard about a man who was really quiet and wouldn’t ask anyone out. A girl in church was chasing him. She was very pretty. He wouldn’t marry her because she was a blonde. (Go to Wal-Mart and get the blond dye.)
-I had a dream but the more I hung out with God, He changed my dream to a FRIEND.
-I love the idea of God bringing Eve to Adam. Adam didn’t know what he needed but he knew it when he saw it.
Genesis 2
18 ¶ The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."
19 Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name.
20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. But for Adam no suitable helper was found.
21 ¶ So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep; and while he was sleeping, he took one of the man's ribs and closed up the place with flesh.
22 Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib he had taken out of the man, and he brought her to the man.
23 The man said, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called `woman', for she was taken out of man."
24 For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.
25 The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.
-Often we are looking for the wrong thing because of our fantasy.
Ps 68:6 God sets the lonely in families, {Or the desolate in a homeland} he leads forth the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.
-When I lived in Scotland I became very lonely and I realized that I needed to be married.
-Out of that God stirred me to begin to look.
2. WAIT FOR BOAZ, DON’T SETTLE FOR BOZO
Ruth 1
10 and said to her, "We will go back with you to your people."
11 But Naomi said, "Return home, my daughters. Why would you come with me? Am I going to have any more sons, who could become your husbands?
12 Return home, my daughters; I am too old to have another husband. Even if I thought there was still hope for me--even if I had a husband tonight and then gave birth to sons--
13 would you wait until they grew up? Would you remain unmarried for them? No, my daughters. It is more bitter for me than for you, because the LORD's hand has gone out against me!"
14 At this they wept again. Then Orpah kissed her mother-in-law good-bye, but Ruth clung to her.
15 "Look," said Naomi, "your sister-in-law is going back to her people and her gods. Go back with her."
16 But Ruth replied, "Don't urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God.
17 Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the LORD deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me."
18 When Naomi realised that Ruth was determined to go with her, she stopped urging her.
Chapter 3
9 "Who are you?" he asked. "I am your servant Ruth," she said. "Spread the corner of your garment over me, since you are a kinsman-redeemer."
10 "The LORD bless you, my daughter," he replied. "This kindness is greater than that which you showed earlier: You have not run after the younger men, whether rich or poor.
-The story is great. Boaz takes care of Ruth and marries her. In that culture it was very important to have a spouse and children.
-David and Jesus are in her lineage.
-She was looking for the same thing he was looking for, character.
-EXAMPLE IN RHEMA?
-Many of you have stories of how your flesh tried to rule you into marrying someone who fits the bill of the movies.
-Remember sin is to miss the mark. Don’t follow your flesh. Hit the bullseye.
-Bozo is all dressed up on the outside. Boaz had character.
3. WHAT’S ALL THIS TALK ABOUT SEX?
-I was flipping through the other day and it really shocked me how totally focused on sex the TV was.
-God created sex; it is best enjoyed by those in Covenant with Him and a spouse.
-Sex is much more than physical. It is emotional and spiritual.
-The reason the world is so caught up with it is because to them: THAT IS INTIMACY.
-That is the most vital way you can share your life with someone else.
-The truth is, sex is only a doorway to true intimacy.
-Sex is the vehicle you drive to get to real marital communion.
-True communion is sharing your life, not just your body.
-True intimacy is gained by being a Christian because that awakens that part of you.
-Then you share your life with someone that you totally trust.
-Read the Song of Solomon, it will make you blush.
READ THE LIST OF FORBIDDEN BIBLICAL PRACTICES.
-Beyond that, GOD GAVE US ALL THINGS TO ENJOY.
4. WHAT DO YOU DO IF YOUR PRINCE IS STILL A FROG?
-The first step is, DON’T MARRY A FROG. MAKE THEM CHANGE FIRST.
-Isn’t that what people think when they get married, I CAN CHANGE THEM. THEY WILL BE A FROG SOMEDAY.
1 Corinthians 7
10 ¶ To the married I give this command (not I, but the Lord): A wife must not separate from her husband.
11 But if she does, she must remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband. And a husband must not divorce his wife.
12 To the rest I say this (I, not the Lord): If any brother has a wife who is not a believer and she is willing to live with him, he must not divorce her.
13 And if a woman has a husband who is not a believer and he is willing to live with her, she must not divorce him.
14 For the unbelieving husband has been sanctified through his wife, and the unbelieving wife has been sanctified through her believing husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy.
15 But if the unbeliever leaves, let him do so. A believing man or woman is not bound in such circumstances; God has called us to live in peace.
-You may be a missionary in your own home.
1 Peter 3
1 ¶ Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behaviour of their wives,
2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.
3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewellery and fine clothes.
4 Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight.
READ INSERTS FROM INSIGHT FOR LIVING
-Don’t give up. God can do wonderful things if you believe Him.
-Don’t put up with physical abuse for you or your children.
-Sometimes separation is necessary. That isn’t divorce.
5. HOW DO YOU FIND A HUSBAND OR WIFE?
1 Thessalonians 4
4 that each of you should learn to control his own body {Or learn to live with his own wife; or learn to acquire a wife} in a way that is holy and honourable,
-Recognize that only God can fill the void in your life. Husbands and wives can’t.
-Throw away your lust list.
-Don’t claim someone else, they have a free will.
-Don’t date someone you can’t afford to marry. In other words, you know God doesn’t want you to marry them but you keep hanging with them.
-Girls will say about a guy, we are just friends, he doesn’t think so.
-Seek the Lord-He knows where your partner is.
Pr 18:22 ¶ He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favour from the LORD.
(NIV)
Ps 84:11 For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD bestows favour and honour; no good thing does he withhold from those whose walk is blameless.
-50 years from now you will be able to say, this person is a gift from God in my life, sent from Him to challenge, help, and fulfill me as I give myself to them.
THAT, IS HAPPILY EVER AFTER.