The Role of a Christian Wife
Notes
Transcript
Introduction
Introduction
This morning we are heading back to Ephesians chapter 5 and we are going to be talking about the role of wives in marriage and the church.
Now you might ask why?
I told you last week when we addressed the role of husbands, we could talk about you next…ha!
But in all seriousness, there is a role for each of us in marriage and in our homes, in the church and in the relationships God has given us.
God has placed us here, not by accident, but by his will. He has redeemed us, given us a new life. And if you are here today and do not know the Savior, today is the opportunity of a life time.
Now think about our life, when God created Eve, He created a very good person for Adam. She as perfect.
And for us, God has given us a spouse, someone to walk with in this life and hopefully someone that will bless you and encourage you here as you do the same for them.
Now if you are here and not married, God has given great women to walk along side of you as a friend, helper and blessing.
Now last week we looked at three thoughts...
Now last week we looked at three thoughts...
Marriage is God’s institution, in it God has joined man and woman together and founded the home.
Let Christ rule in your hearts… To have a successful life, Christ must rule in your heart.
And finally, husbands I reminded you that you were to love sacrificially. The Bible calls for husbands to love their wives like Christ loved the church and gave himself for her. Husbands must sacrificially love their wives in all things.
This morning we are going to continue this thought for the home. I am going to talk about the role of the wife, but also the home you both must establish and be in agreement about....
So today we return to the book of Ephesians and we will be looking at Chapter 5.
Verses 22-33
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Today I have recapped the passage we began with last week, now it is time to move forward...
1. Be in Right Relationship with One Another as to the Lord...
1. Be in Right Relationship with One Another as to the Lord...
It seems easy to talk about marriage, or the role of a husband or a wife, but honestly it is not…
Why?????
There are so many preconceived notions that often keep people from understanding the true role they play in marriage, in God’s kingdom and in the mission He has called us too.
So lets consider this first thought, Be in right relationship with one another as to the Lord.
What does that mean?
First off, examine your heart. Is your heart right with Jesus. What do we do, how do we make sure it is in the right place...
Ask yourself this question… are you a born again child of God. This truth is where it all begins, are you His child, are you saved, you have asked Jesus into your heart, to forgive you of sin, to be Lord of your life… to save you?
This is crucial to the home, to the marriage and to the family.
That is the first place to begin for husbands and wives…
Now you might ask, can you prove it Preacher… Yep!
Look back with me to Ephesians 5
Verse 15-21
21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
This passage is crucial to the next, you must see what the Apostle Paul is saying here, for it complements the other passage and gives it a fuller meaning. Paul is talking to believers her, men and women.
He tells us to be wise, wise in how we walk. Literally be careful how you live in this world. Paul says not as unwise but as wise.
In a world touched by sin, and a world where the ungodly can hold positions over us, we are to be careful about our actions… as to not bring judgement upon our self.
But how can one do this… A. Be saved, a child of God. But verse 18, Paul gives us another piece of information… Be filled with the Holy Spirit instead of false intoxicants...
I love this phrase: be filled with the Holy Spirit, it is the same phrase used of John the Baptist in , where Gabriel the angel is telling Zechariah of the qualities his son is called to have...
15 for he will be great before the Lord. And he must not drink wine or strong drink, and he will be filled with the Holy Spirit, even from his mother’s womb.
The Holy Spirit is not something we earn, God imparts His Spirit to us for His purposes… at salvation the Holy Spirit comes into our lives. and we are called to be under His control.
Here is a thought for you… want to have a blessed marriage, live under the Holy Spirits control and not ours or someone else.
Friends I believe this with all my heart. I can only be in right relationship with my wife, my children or anyone else if my heart is right, that means salvation. I must be saved and living as unto the Lord, for Him and not myself if I am going to be in the best relationship with others.
Be under His control.
Let me share another passage with you...
15 And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. 16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. 17 And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Listen to Paul here… He is very pointed in what he says..
A. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts… this is your calling in Christ.
B. Let the Word dwell in you… Why, this way you can grow yourself in your walk with Jesus, you can teach others and model Christlikeness to them.
C. Model Jesus in all your ways… What ever you do, do everything as unto Him.
Have you ever thought that the way you live in relationship to your family, your husband or wife, the way you live honors Jesus?
Man that is something awesome, I am honoring Jesus in all things// So men as you love your wives, you are loving Jesus. Wives as you love your husbands you are loving Jesus..
Now it doesn’t get any better than that… Our life in Him counts for everything we do...
Now lets move on.....
2. Submission....
2. Submission....
This by far is one of the hottest topics when someone wants to talk about wives and without a doubt will put their foot not only in their mouth, but all the way down their throat....
So lets go back to our text and see that the Paul is saying and what it means for us...
We hang all of this on verses 22-24,
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
Ok there is text what is being said....
A. First off, there is a natural order of life. The comparison is ultimately Christ and the church (us) we are called to be submissive to Him, to live under His rule, ways… Likewise it is a picture of many things.
1. Husband and wives, 2. Parents and Children and finally 3. Masters and Slaves.
So what does it mean… Lord help me here.... lol
So as the Church lives and has its life under Christ, so wives are to live and be blessed, find life connected to their husband.
I want you to understand the word “rule” cannot function here. As a husband our place is never to rule, lord over our lives. We have a natural order of things, but there is a right and wrong way to live there.
This is ultimately a result of the fall of man, Adam and Eve had a perfect relationship, right? Yes, it was perfect in all things. Then sin entered the world.
Listen to
16 To the woman he said,
“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
Your desire shall be contrary to your husband,
but he shall rule over you.”
Consider if you will that everything was perfect in the garden, no sin, no death, no pain or suffering… but her actions and that of her husband has changed this… Her actions have brought pain and instead of having a incredible life, now life, child bearing, all of life would bear problems…pain
In fact all of creation would share in this....
Even her relationship with her husband had changed… from true equality not submission is brought into consideration. She would be subject to Him...
Now in ancient society, honestly it became that women had no rights, no place, no say.. way back then.... women were more property than equal…
But Christ has changed all of this...
B. Submission is a two way street… What do I mean?
We see in the text that is says plainly… wives are to be subject to their husbands in all things… Verses 22-24
But I want to direct your thought to a passage before this one to help you see something perhaps a tab bit different.
let me take you to verse 15-21
15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil. 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is. 18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit, 19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, 20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
I want you to pay attention to verses 15, 18 and then 21 in particular...
Look carefully how you walk… walk as one wise not as unwise. Be careful how you live and walk in this world. Walk as a child of God, being careful in the world you live.
5 Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.
Women and men… you will have great marriages, relationships, and other points of this wonderful life, no matter what we face… it will be excellent if we live for Jesus in all things.
2. Be will with the Spirit… Truly this goes hands and hands with what we were just talking about… I should be living in a way that I am His each day and the Holy Spirit has the freedom to bless and work within us....
3. Submit to each other in all things.... he role of a husband and wife is that of a team, we are to put each other ahead of our selves, I want my best for Marci and I know she does for me
Let me share
3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
The marriage is not about me… it’s not about her, it is about us! It is about OUR relationship as a couple in front of Christ and then our home. We strive to bless our home by reflecting His love and sacrifice to those under us.
So we work together… Now Marci will tell you, and ladies the Husband is the head of the home. No doubt about that, She trusts me, she allows me to make the final decisions in our home but honestly as a good husband, honoring Christ in all things..
My say… it is and should be a true reflection of our decision. It is our decision.
Do all of this… out of reverence for Christ… verse 21b.
My relationship to Jesus, Her relationship to Jesus is the mark of our lives, as such we together are a apart of the Bride, the Bride of Christ. Our lives are to be led in such a way that in all things we bring honor and glory to Him.
Finally today, thank you. , here is my last thought..
Finally today, thank you.
3. Thanksgiving for the Role of Women
3. Thanksgiving for the Role of Women
I want to say thank you to my wife, and to all the wives here today.. For in each of you, you bless and bring love to our home.
I think of
I want to say thank you to my wife, and to all the wives here today..
Solomon, who I will never understand all the wives and concubines, he tells us this...
10 An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
Why do I say this… wives have an important role in the home and in the church, they are indeed precious and MEN… please do not take them for granted...
An excellent wife… who can find… Solomon reminds us that a “good” wife is a precious, precious thing…
Men, to have a saved wife who loves Jesus and loves you… we are blessed.
There is more value to them than we can ever think or Know....
Solomon says much in this area, but verse 30 tells us..
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
A woman who loves Jesus is the greatest quality of all.
I cannot express what it means to have a saved wife, a wife who loves Jesus.
Men, put your wives above yourself, love them and cherish them. For God has created your help mate and has blessed you with her..
When I think about us, the husband and wife, we are blessed. submit to one another, live for each others best and put Jesus at the top of all things...
1 The words of King Lemuel. An oracle that his mother taught him:
2 What are you doing, my son? What are you doing, son of my womb?
What are you doing, son of my vows?
3 Do not give your strength to women,
your ways to those who destroy kings.
4 It is not for kings, O Lemuel,
it is not for kings to drink wine,
or for rulers to take strong drink,
5 lest they drink and forget what has been decreed
and pervert the rights of all the afflicted.
6 Give strong drink to the one who is perishing,
and wine to those in bitter distress;
7 let them drink and forget their poverty
and remember their misery no more.
8 Open your mouth for the mute,
for the rights of all who are destitute.
9 Open your mouth, judge righteously,
defend the rights of the poor and needy.
10 An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant;
she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She dresses herself with strength
and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor
and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates
when he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;
she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her works praise her in the gates.